Saturday, February 6, 2010

‘Coppers pining for ARCA race

Apparently four members of Everett’s “Finest,” a.k.a. ‘Duh Fuzz just couldn’t contain themselves in anticipation of DannaCars RALLY- RALLY- RALLY-BIG Racin’ debut thingy…

As NOPE! They weren’t on ‘Dare way to a Dunkin Doughnuts Shop… Nor racin’ off to be first in line at the Krispy Cream Outlet Store… NOPE! They were in Hot Pursuit of ‘Juan ‘O ‘Dem Bad Boyz, Bad Boyz, watch-ya gonna dooze? Who apparently was tryin’ to do his best Dukes ‘O Hazzard impersonation. Getter Done!

Having allegedly stolen a parked Pick’em Up Truck, the Sno-Homer Suspect led Police on a wild car chase, which resulted in NOT 1, BAM! Err 2-CRASH… Oops-a-dasy SMASH 3! WHAM-4! Count-em 4 ‘Copper Carz crashin into One-another… By golly Ociffer… I think you’ve sunk my Battleship?

In a scene that woulda made the Keystone Cops proud, the suspect abandoned the Pick-em Up Truck and tried fleeing the scene on foot… As the 4 ‘Coppers converged upon the scene simultaneously, with the first two crashin’ into each othere…
While the third struck the pursuing Ociffer on foot and thus breaking both of his wrists and ‘Juan knee, while a second ‘Copper broke two fingers when his air bag deployed upon striking a concrete flower box upon swerving to miss the carnage of three other wrecked Cop Carz! As all four Ociffer’s were then taken to nearby Hospitals.

No word on whether or not the episode will air upon SPEED’s Hit series ‘CRACKED! Err, I believe its titled ‘Jacked? Oh that’s rite, ‘Dare busy with some Roundy-round shows this weekend…

Police Blotter: Everett, WA

1 comment:

  1. This hopefully was caught in its entirety on one of the dash cams and is then put on YouTube via the freedom of information act. Could be a $10,000 candidate on America's Funniest Videos too!!!