Thursday, August 29, 2013

German Renaissance in IndyCar racing?

While I’m always remotely interested in who’ll make the annual Silly Season roster - both in Indy Cars and Formula 1, to which I’ve previously scribbld how I find the names ‘TK Follow-your-Schnoz Kanaan & thee Mayor ‘O Hinchtown, aka James Hinchcliffe to be some pretty B-I-G names you’d not necessarily expect to be in the mix for the 2014 Driver Merry-go-Round, of which thee OLD-est IndyCar Blogger has written 'bout in;

Nevertheless I’ve been more curious about the following Questione that’s been bouncin’ round in my cranium lately ever since reading of Lucas Luhr’s debutant IndyCar race outing at "2 Infineon 'N Beyond;" Hya!With Luhr scheduled to take to the wheel of Sarah Fisher Hartman Racing's No. 97 (second) entry at Sonoma, CA last weekend. With the daunting Questione being:

Who was the last German IndyCar driver to race in Indy Cars?


TIMES UP! Put 'Dem No. 2 pencils down... Hmm? Does anybody use a No. 2 pencil anymore? But I digress...

As it seems that drivers from Der Fatherland tend to stay away from racing single seaters in America, tending to stick to Formula 1 instead, as according to 'WICKEDpedia, there's apparently some 55 names listed as F1 drivers...

As Lucas Luhr's another Kick Ass BAD ARSE German racing driver who's made his name predominantly in Sports Cars racing to date, ironically having just watched him win the ALMS race at thee famous Road America behind the wheel of the dominating Muscle Milk Racing team with German co-driver Klaus Grath - with Luhr lamenting how sad it would be to not be racing the LMP1 chassis for a long time at Elkhart Lake after taking his fifth victory of the season.

As although Luhr began his motorsports career like most European drivers by racing Go Karts, successfully winning many trophies and ultimately capturing the 1994 European Karting championship before transitioning to single seaters, Lucas instead made the choice to become a Porsche factory driver and has scored multiple class victories at Sebring, Daytona and Le Mans, along with multiple championship titles including the Porsche Carerra Cup and ALMS GT category.

Then later in his Porsche Factory Driver career, he became one of The Captain's (Roger Penske) hired guns chauffeuring those awesome Porsche RS Spyders... Before switching to rival Audi's camp in 2008 and then ultimately winding up in the American Le Mans Series, which will be swallowed whole in the Grand Am-ALMS Sports Car mergification next year, hence prompting team owner Greg Picket's exploratory venture into Open Wheel Racing...

To Find Out what My Answer was to thy Questione Above, see:

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Miller Moves On...

Couldn't think of anything catchy for the title lead-in here, since I didn't want to be accused of being... Hmm? Certainly there's a story-line intertwining 'R, aka Robin Miller and Pamela Anderson, Ashley Judd, etc, right? As I'm sure that thee 'Ol Curmudgeon of Open Wheel Racing would have something clever to say about Anderson's becoming a team owner, I dunno; like being hands on or something?

And even though Miller himself personally didn't get fired from SPEED, nevertheless, Robin, Marshall Pruett, Dave Despain and Adam Alexander are just some of the talent let go with the demise of the once great racing channel's ARSE-simulation into another FUCKING Stick 'N Ball TV outlet...

 Thus it's good to know that Racer had the sense to pick-up Miller & Pruett  for their IndyCar section, although I'm not sure who's who of this Odd Couple? Hya!

And you can also now visit for Miller's vaunted weekly Mailbag colum...

'Monty Making Comeback?

So I heard 'bout the news via Curt Cavin's IndyStar piece (8/19) about how Juan Pablo Montoya had contacted Mikey Andretti about a possible ride in Indy Cars next year, to which Mikey said "HELL YEAH!" ("BRING IT ON!") Provided he can find the necessary sponsorship.

Yet what I find interesting 'bout the article is how Andretti is trying to figure out how to slot all of his potential drivers into rides next year, as Mikey's still waiting to hear back from Go Daddy on whether or not they want to renew 'Hinches contract? As thee Mayor 'O Hinchtown (James Hinchcliffe) is currently free to negotiate with other potential teams, i.e.; Chip Ganassi, etc.

Plus there's Marco most assuredly set to remain with the team, Ryan Hunter-Reay has  a contract and E.J. "What, Me Worry?" Viso most likely to keep his ride due to his CITGO sponsorship, while there's some Up & Comer named  Carlos Munoz looking to graduate to the B-I-G CARZ next year.

All of which made me  scream... Then why doesn't Gary Peterson of AFS fame simply start-up his own two car operation? That way Mikey could keep his current four car operation with AFS as his satellite team and then they'd just have to figure out who drives for who if Montoya  and Munoz join the party...

Yet the interesting part is that obviously thee 'Cheepster has different designs for his fourth seat alongside Charlie Kimball at the 'G2 squad, otherwise you'd think he'd already have inserted Montoya there... And NO! I won't make any jokes about Montoya's backside being too large to fit in an IndyCar, after all which is how he got the nickname 'Mac, right? Which of course reminds me of somebody named Nige; Hya!

Yet it almost seems that by Mikey going public so early, that Juan Pablo won't be landing there, but then who else in the IndyCar paddock might be willing to gamble upon the Columbian? Hmm? Why is my gut telling me that Monty may become the new Barracuda Ambassador? As it would be a definite boost for Bryan Herta and what type better driver could be sponsored by Barracuda, eh?

As somehow I cannot see Montoya driving for 'lil Napoleon's (Tony George) team; Err Eddie Fuzzy Wuzzy Carpenter, John "Print This!" Barnes or whoever else is left in the paddock, since after all, all Monty wants to do is drive for a winner!

Anyone for Aerokits?

Chirp-Chirp, is this thingy on? As Gee Wally, guess what? Looks like Indy Cars may finally get around to introducing the much vaunted Aerokits, which I've firmly affixed as thee Body-by-Mennen AFX Aurora Aerokit era... As really, you're gonna be able to waltz into your local GM or Honda dealership and buy one of 'Dem swoopy looking Honda-Honda's? Or Chevrolet-Chevrolet; Err Chevrolet's? As this whole concept is STUPID!

Monday, August 26, 2013

A Day of Questionable Officiating?

So I totally understand the call, as in obviously priority number one is Pit Crew safety, and the fact that I cannot see - means I couldn't see the supposed waywardness of the Penske tyre changer who Scott Dixon called out for making a DICK move by purposely walking into his car... Yet it seems pretty interesting how two drivers were going Banana's in the Booth, with a third saying it was dirty pool - while Penske Team President Tim Cindric seemed pretty nonchalant about the whole affair and flatly said; I have NO idea if it was on purpose, you'll have to ask him....

And I'm happy that Will Power finally got the monkey off his back over his victory drought, but I was rootin' instead for Justin 'B-I-G UNIT Wilson to get around his ex-Champ Car competitor which seemingly would have been justice for Race Control taking away a probable victory from Dixon; yet haven't the Penske boyz been victims of crew mistakes before?

And although the Penske crew member in question seemingly was carrying his tyre perhaps awkwardly, nevertheless  I just can't believe that he or anybody on Pitlane would purposely walk into a speeding car!

Yet perhaps part of the issue was the multitude 'O painted pit box lines? Since apparently the difference between the 'RASSCAR boxes and the IndyCar boxes were confusing to thee casual fan...

Meanwhile, earlier in the day at the mighty Spa-Francorchamps, Pastor 'Wyldthing Maldonado seemingly got away with another bad, bad move, as I personally feel that Maldonado should have been slapped with a 10-grid spot penalty for Monza for simply turning into the pits upon an unsuspecting Paul di resta, instead of simply being given a Drive-thru penalty, since as the announcers said, Maldonado's race, and more importantly Di Resta's races were already ruined.

But back to Sonoma, which certainly was anything but boring, as in NO Snorhoma today, right? The race simply left me with a bad taste in my mouth, since if 'HULIO (Castroneves) goes on to win the championship this year, I'll not be impressed at all, since to date his single win came with a car penalized Post-race for a technical infraction and Dixon was possibly victimized of massively cutting into Hulio's points lead, and thus I now find myself firmly rooting for Dixon to overcome this dark cloud of controversy and win his third championship; as after all, whatever happened to the driver with more race wins being crowned champ?

While I take exception to 'Crash Gladys's comment towards being sick 'N tired of race fans simply believing everything that the announcers say... Hey, if you're visually impaired and the sunshine in California is so bright that you cannot S-E-E the cars clearly upon your television screen, then you're kinda between a rock and a hard place, eh? Yet shame upon the reporters who are just doing their jobs by shoving microphones into the faces of angry racecar drivers immediately after an incident and then needling them incessantly about did he do I-T on purpose?

So I'm not sure what the answer is, as I totally believe that as Statmann Carutherz pointed out, the first and only priority should be the safety and well being of the humans on Pitlane trying to dance about hurtlin' metal & carbon fibre 650bhp missiles and the rules ARE the rules, i.e.; any vehicular contact with either equipment, tyres or crew members is an automatic penalty!

As another valid point Statmann brought up is the unintended consequences of said hit tyre gaining momentum and potentially hitting the offending driver or unsuspecting crewmen on Pitlane, as  let's recall what happened when Mark Webber's Red Bull was released prematurely without its wheel securely attached in Germany - as fortunately the FOM Cameraman survived  being struck by the errant tyre, albeit with broken bones and a nasty concussion... While the team was quickly fined $30,000 Euros for the releasing of an unsafe racecar!

So while I still think that Maldonado should get a penalty for his erratic ontrack driving, I have to say that I find myself agreeing with Beaux Barfield's ultimate call upon Dixon, with perhaps the only thing being questioned is whether there should be some sort of perceived tyre removal procedures on Pitlane? Although I think instead IndyCar should mandate the overhead air hoses instead of chucking about Air guns if we're gonna get into safety procedures on Pitlane...