F1: Where will Horner go Now?

And can Red Bull turn around its Sinking Ship?

 

Have to say it came as a surprise to Mwah, reading the news over Christian Horner, the Pied Piper of Red Bull Racing being released of His duties as CEO effective immediately on Wednesday morning, July 9th.

 

Horner, alleged of “Bullying” and sexually harassing a female Red Bull employee, His personal assistant at the start of the 2024 Formula 1 season, in which the Daily Mail is calling a sext texting scandal, claims that Horner has gotten His “Cumuffins”, which I find overly rich…

 

As Horner was cleared twice from this sexual harassment allegation by two separate Barristers, and had seemed to weather the storm, especially after Max Verstappen won His fourth, consecutive World Championship last year.

 

While I do not condone any form of sexual harassment, I find the Hypocrisy of one of His fiercest critic, once fondly known as Jos the Boss Verstappen dubious at best! Since Verstappen Senior seemed to be spearheading the charge for Horner’s dismissal over a year ago.

 

As why is no one writing about Jos’s former multiple Domestic Assaults? Having surrendered to Dutch police in January 2012, spending two weeks in Jail for Attempted Murder! Having supposedly tried to run down His former girlfriend, before being released due to lack of evidence.

 

This followed His ex-girlfriend being taken to hospital in November, 2011, after physical beating by Jos. For which the former 24 year old girlfriend, when Jos was 39 said had happened before.

 

Not to mention being fined and given three months suspended jail sentence in 2008 for domestic violence against his ex-wife, Max’s Mum. Or being convicted of Assault for breaking a man’s skull at a Karting track some ten-plus years prior…

 

Although I’m in no way defending the Dutchman’s unscrupulous antics. I’m now wondering if the Headline about the team imploding if Horner remained in power after the sex-texting scandal by Jos, stemmed from His personal experience?

 

Like Him or not, Horner led Red Bull to eight F1 Drivers and six Constructors Championships over His twenty-plus tenue as leader of Red Bull. Not to mention 124 Grands Prix victories in 405 starts, the fourth most ever by a Formula 1 team.

 

Therefore, at age 51, I cannot see Horner being finished in F1, and three current F1 teams jump out immediately to Mwah as possible landing destinations. Even though it sounds like Horner is on mandatory “gardening Leave” for the moment.

 

Horner has been rumoured to be on Ferrari’s radar previously, which He’s turned la Scuderia down previously to stay at Red Bull. Seeing currently embattled Team Principal Frederic Vausser landing the job.

 

But if F1 Pundit Ralf Schumacher is correct over Horner not appreciating criticism, then Ferrari seems like a bad fit. Since the Italian press is constantly castigating Scuderia Ferrari over its poor performance, and continuously demanding the dismissal of whomever is in charge! Not to mention uprooting wife Geri Halliwell and family to Italy.

 

No, for Mwah the two most likely future destinations would seem to be either Alpine or Cadillac.

 

The move to Cadillac would be brilliant, giving them instant creditability. Not to mention somebody in charge with a winning pedigree. Although not sure how this would work out for current boss Graeme Lowdon?

 

Although again, the TWG Group seems intent on running the F1 operation out of its Fishers complex in the future, implying that Horner would need to move to another country. Unless perhaps Lowdon became Deputy Team Principal and oversaw the Stateside operation?

 

While I’d say the most logical choice would be Alpine, provided it gave Horner a long enough leash to turn the franchise around. Since they’ve got a nasty habit of dumping leadership routinely!

 

Although reportedly, Horner is good friends with HMS Monogram’, aka flavour Flav’, nee Flavio Briatore, who may be quick to snap up the services of His friend?

 

Whilst what about Steve Nielsen? Just confirmed as the team’s new Managing Director, effective September 1st. As Nielsen will be responsible for day-to-day operations.

 

But being a truly British team based at Enstone, and supposedly with updated premises, this would be the most convenient for Horner. As who knows where it could lead?

 

While you’d have to think that Aston Martin’s a longshot, since I think there’s already too many Cooks in the kitchen! And how would Adrian Newey feel about re-uniting with Horner?

 

As only time will tell where Messer Horner lands, provided He does return to Formula 1 in the future, which feels inevitable to Mwah…

 

Meanwhile, Laurent Mekies, previous Boss of Racing Bulls takes over as CEO of Red Bull Racing. As the Frenchman began His Formula 1 career with Arrows, and engineered several F1 drivers at Minardi and Scuderia toro Rosso. He spent a brief stint as the FIA’s Safety Director and Deputy Race Director. Then moved to Ferrari as its Sporting Director before becoming Racing Bulls Team Principal.

 

Alan “Bat” Permane becomes Racing Bulls new Team Principal. Which will be interesting to see how the ‘lil bulls progress?

 

As Racing Bulls were currently tied for seventh place with Aston Martin on 36 Markers apiece, in the vaunted Constructors Championship before Mekies moved to Red Bull. With Sauber vaulting five points ahead to sixth, thanks to Nico Hulkenberg’s excellent third place finish at Silverstone. 

F1: What’s Going On at Alpine?

And who’s really in charge?

 

While IndyCar is Brickyard centric right now, with only eyes for Mother Speedway. As I’ve typed many times before, Motorsports never sleeps!

 

Alpine has long been Renault’s sports car brand and the two firms have long associations with Formula 1. With Alpine’s dating back to 1968 and Renault first being a Formula 1 Constructor in 1977.

 

Renault has been in and out of Formula 1 many times, with it’s zenith being double world champions, i.e.; winning both Drivers and Constructors titles back-to-back in 2005-06.

 

With the team’s low point being 2008’s Crash Gate, for which a disgruntled Nelson Piquet Jr. divulged the following year when sacked by Flavio Briatore…

 

Diehard f1 Afficionados will know that Renault bought Benetton in 2000, and became the Renault F1 Team in 2002. Before morphing into the Lotus F1 Team in 2012, then Lotus Renault GP, or visa versa? Next becoming Renault Sport F1 Team in 2016 and finally Alpine in 2021.

 

The team has had much staff turnover since becoming the BWT Alpine F1 Team, with then team principal Cyril Abiteboul leaving after their transition from Renault to Alpine. As Davide Brivio, former Suzuki MotoGP team boss took over for Abiteboul, albeit with mixed results.

 

In January 2022, Marcin Budkowski, who’d risen to the role of director at Alpine, previously Renault’s executive technical director. And non-executive director Alain Prost both left the organization. With Otmar Szafnauer, previously Aston Martin’s F1 team principal, taking over the same role at Alpine.

 

Meanwhile Bruno Famin was hired to lead Renault’s Power Unit organization at Viry-Chatillon. And somebody named Oscar Piastri replaced Daniil Kvyat as test driver, as we all know how that worked out, El Correctomundo!

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2022/08/i-will-not-be-driving-for-insert-race.html

 

In July 2023 Laurent Rossi was replaced by Philippe Kreis as CEO, before Szafnauer and longtime employee Alan “Bat” Permane, having risen to Sporting Director were “let go” following the Belgian Grand Prix. With Chief Technical Officer Pat Fry leaving at the end of the year for Williams. Which are just some of the staff exodus over the past four years…

 

Monsieur Famin, who’d taken over as team principal was replaced by Oliver Oakes during the 2024 F1 Summer Holiday and began as team principal at last year’s Dutch Grand Prix on August 25th. Which brings us full circle to the latest management shakeup.

 

As Renault hired the highly controversial HMS Monogram’, aka Flavio Briatore to an executive advisor role last May, having already noted Briatore’s role in Crash Gate, not to mention Benetton’s legendous’ “trick” Option 13 launch control on the B194 chassis that Michael Schumacher drove to the first of His eventual seven F1 world championships…

 

Briatore signed Franco Colapinto as one of the team’s reserve drivers this January. for which I tend to recall that before the season began, scuttlebutt suggested that Jack Doohan was only guaranteed six Grans Prix races, with cynics suggesting this was why Doohan’s F1 debut was pushed forward to last year’s season ending Abu Dhabi GP.

 

Naturally, Oakes shock resignation was confirmed just days following the Miami Grand Prix; Tuesday, May 6th. One day prior to Alpine making official Doohan being replaced by Colapinto on a five-race deal beginning at Imola, with the team’s statement saying nothing more would be said regarding Oakes sudden departure.

 

Yet 24 hours later, Briatore, now the acting team principal felt the need to comment further, claiming Oakes departure had nothing to due with Doohan’s demotion to reserve driver and Colapinto’s insertion into the Aussie’s race seat. And was of a personal nature instead. For which that all seems a wee Bitamyte’ too convenient, or just plain good ‘Ol CoInky-dense, eh? Since rumours suggest that Oakes felt under minded by Briatore’s drivers decision…

 

Yet two days after Oakes resignation, it was reported that His younger brother William Oakes, age 31 had been arrested by the Metropolitan Police on the charge of transferring criminal property. Claiming that He had a large amount of cash in His possession when detained nearby Silverstone, where Hitech Racing’s located.

 

As William is listed as a director of Hitech Racing, founded by older brother Oliver, with the latter not being implicated of any wrong doing.

 

Whilst I’m doing my best to stay away from the previous majority owner Dmitry Mazepin angle to this story. Yes, that’s former Haas F1 driver Nikita “Mazaspin’s” father…

 

Although it’s also been pointed out by Racer’s Chris Medland that the writing for Doohan as been on the wall ever since Colapinto was signed to Alpine’s cast of rotating test and reserve drivers due to His sizeable sponsorship backing from Argentina and previous race pace at Williams last season.

 

But I simply do not understand how a rookie F1 driver is supposed to flourish in such a hostile environment! Since Doohan was Alpine’s first Driver Acadamey member to actually graduate to a race seat, albeit briefly. Meaning is it worth being an Academy member after all?

 

Since former Alpine Academy member Christian Lundgaard is doing quite nicely in IndyCar now, currently lying second in the championship – when I began scribbling this.

 

Alpine currently sits ninth in the vaunted F1 Constructors championship, only ahead of Sauber, who are in a transition year before becoming the Audi Werks’ outfit next season.

 

As Briatore, who’s now 75 is tasked with making Alpine into a winner once again, albeit for Mwah, it’s completely sacrilegious over Alpine becoming a Mercedes customer team next year! But that’s another story waiting to be laboriously poonded’ out here on No Fenders…

 

As can Alpine ever claw it’s way back to the sharp end of the grid? Since they’ve only one once as a F1 Constructor, when Esteban Ocon took an unlikely victory at the Hungaroring in 2021.

 

Prior to that, Renault hadn’t won a Grand Prix since the 2008 Japanese Grand Prix as a constructor. Albeit Red bull ran le Reggie’s 2.4-litre normally aspirated V-8 enginesas a customer between 2010-2013 enroute to four consecutive doubles championships, i.e.; F1 Drivers and Constructors titles… 

Japan’s Next Wave?

Although will any of these prospects succeed to the Pinnicle of Motorsport?

 

As my working title was Japanese Drivers Logjam…

 

Japan has a long, storied history with formula 1. As the very first Japanese driver to Enter a international Federation Internationale de l’Automobile (FIA) sanctioned race fifty years ago was Hiroshi Fushida, who failed on both of His entries with the uncompetitive Maki Engineering F101 normally aspirated 3.0-liter Ford-Cosworth DFV V-8 racecar.

 

Hiroshi’s Cossie’ lump’ “Done blown Up!” at that year’s Dutch Grand Prix, for which the team didn’t have a spare motor! And then He failed to qualify (DNQ) at the 1975 British Grand Prix.

 

Hiroshi also contested the SCCA’s Can Am and Trans Am series Stateside. And made history alongside countryman Tetsu Ikuzawa, when they became the first two Japanese drivers to compete in the 24 Heurs du Mans. Driving a Mazda  Wankel rotary powered Sigma MS73 (SARD) in the 1973 event.

 

Japan’s first Formula 1 race was the epic 1976 Japanese Grand Prix at Fuji Speedway, where a further four Japanese drivers entered their country’s inaugural Grand Prix; Masahiro Hasemi, Kazuyoshi Hoshino, Masani Kuwashina and Noritake Takahara.

 

Although reputedly Kuwashina’s sponsorship Cheque failed to materialize, scratching Him from competing, i.e. DNS. (Did Not Start) Being replaced by Hans Binder.

 

Whilst Hasemi, Hoshino and Takahara all contested the race, becoming Japan’s first three Formula 1 drivers. Although I’d surmise this accomplishment was totally overshadowed by that year’s Mega’ F1 Drivers championship showdown between Niki Lauda and Jame Hunt, which is wonderfully documented in ‘lil Ronnie Howard’sexcellent Rush movie…

 

Kazuyoshi Hoshino’s nickname was “The Fastest Man in Japan”, which is pretty “Heady” suff!

 

Reportedly there have been 21 Japanese drivers to attempt a Grand Prix to date, with 18 making starts. Which I won’t attempt chronicling! Other than three have stood on the third step of the podium. First Aguri Suzuki in1990. Followed by arguably Japan’s “Greatest” driver Takuma sato in 2004. And finally K-Squared’, aka Kamui Kobayashi in 2012. With Kamui now firmly established as a Sports Car star; including a World Endurance Championship (WEC) title and 24 Heurs du Mans and Rolex 24 wins to His credit.

 

Currently, Yuki Tsunoda is the only Japanese driver competing in Formula 1, entering His fifth season driving for thee ‘lil bullz’, aka Racing Bulls. Which you’d have to say that Tsunoda’s inclusion in Formula 1 is backed by Red Bull’s engine, Err Power Unit (PU) supplier Honda. Even if Honda “withdrew” from full Factory F1 involvement at the end of 2021.

 

Yuki did finish a very respectable fourth overall in FIA Formula 3, and third overall in Formula 2 with Four poles and three wins before graduating to then AlphaTauri in 2021. Yet with Honda becoming Aston Martin’s Werk’s PU supplier beginning next year, the only option I “See” for Tsunoda is becoming one of Aston Martin’s reserve drivers.

 

But Felipe Drugovich, the 2022 FIA F2 champion has been the team’s reserve driver since 2023. And obviously neither Fernando Alonso or Lance Stroll seem intent on departing Formula 1 anytime soon…

 

Ironically, Tsunoda turns 25 one day after Helio Castroneves 50th birthday on May 10th…

 

Ritomo Miyata who turns 26 this August, appears to be Japan’s best bet for joining the F1 Circus in the future. As Miyata will contest His sophomore season of F2 this year driving for ART Grand Prix. (#15) Having finished P19 overall last year for Rodin Motorsport.

 

Ritomo is a member of the Toyota Gazoo Racing (TGR) Driver Challenge programme, along with being a multiple title winner. Having won both the Super formula and Super GT Championships in 2023. Along with the 2020 Super Formula Lights and 2016-2017 Japanese Formula 4 titles.

 

Miyata was diagnosed with Autism early in life and is an ardent “gamer”. Having won some 500 iSports races!

 

Thanks to Toyota’s technical partnership with the Haas F1 Team, Miyata tested a Haas VF-23 at Jerez recently. Where race drivers Esteban Ocon and Oliver Bearman ran one day apiece, with Ritomo getting valuable “Seat-time” at the end of each day.

 

Although Miyata’s trajectory seems aimed more for eventual Hypercar duty in the WEC for Toyota, unless a seat on the Formula 1 grid opens up…

 

Although Ayumu Iwasa, who currently competes in Super Formula might have something to say about that . As the 23yr old Red Bull Junior Driver and Honda Formula Dream Project member has already tallied two seasons in formula 2. Finishing fifth and fourth overall respectively between 2022-23. And finished fifth overall last year during His rookie Super Formula campaign.

 

Ayumu helped make “Waves” at last year’s Japanese grand Prix, driving in His first Free Practice outing during FP1. Driving alongside Racing Bulls “teammate” Tsunoda. Having last tested for RB during last year’s Abu Dhabi Young Drivers test.

 

Ryo Hirakawa (Age 31) is a Toyota Werks’ (TGR) FIA World Endurance Championship driver, having won two WEC titles along with the 2022 24 Hours of Le Mans. And was announced this January as an Alpine F1 test and reserve driver.

 

As I’m guessing the latter has something to do with team principal Oliver Oakes and Hitech Racing’s involvement with TGR in it’s Junior Open Wheel Racing categories. As Hitech TGR competes in both the FIA Formula 2 and Formula 3 Championships.

 

Interestingly, and this is purely conjecture on my part. But this arrangement gives Toyota two possible paths to future Formula 1 involvement. But that’s just pure conjecture Folks!

 

Lastly, Kakunoshin Ohta made His IMSA GTP debut at this year’s Rolex 24 as part of Meyer shank Racing’s No. 93 Acura ARX06 entry. As the 25yr old Japanese Sports Car driver will also drive the No. 93 at this year’s Watkins Glen and Indianapolis endurance rounds.

 

Kakunoshin also recently tested for era Motorsports, aboard it’s No. 18 LMP2 entry during the Pre-Sebring 12 Hours test in February. And was slated to ad further LMP2 outing to His busy 2025 schedule.

 

Then naturally, as I was putting this story to bed, word came that indeed Ohta would race for Era Motorsports at both the Sebring 12 Hours and later Road America races in the LMP2 category. With HRC US further cementing it’s “ties” with Era Motorsports in a collabourative effort to promote young Japanese drivers to Sports car racing. As Era has already restored previous Acura Sports Car prototypes for Historic Racing…

 

This is just further speculation. But with HRC US (Honda Racing Corporation) President David Salters recently noting how Honda would like to take it’s Acura GTP racecar to Le Mans, could we see Iwasa or Ohta as part of the drivers lineup? 

Presenting the 2025 Formula 1 Senior Member Rookies

Although a total of four Grands Prix Ain’t exactly a large sample size…

 

It has been a very long times since I can recall such an abundance ‘O Formula 1 rookies joining the grid. Which according to my informal archives, last occurred nine seasons ago in 2017. As Pierre Gasly and Lance Stroll remain upon the F1 Grid. Whilst the 2019 and 2023 seasons saw four F1 rookies apiece. With 2019 featuring the top three F2 finishers: Lando Norris, George Russell and Alexander Albon. Whilst 2023 F1 rookies Liam Lawson and Oscar Piastri remain on the grid…

 

Oliver Berman

Team: MoneyGram Haas F1 Team

Nationality: United Kingdom

Birthplace: Havering, London

DOB: May 8, 2005; Age: 19

Car No. 87

 

Believe that “Ollie”, aka Oliver Bearman is still a rookie, albeit having made three starts last season, substituting for Carlos Sainz Jr. at Ferrari and Kevin Magnussen at Haas. As His three Grands Prix starts excluded Him from participating in the Post Abu Dhabi Young Drivers test.

 

Ollie’ began racing Go Karts at age seven, capping a very successful Karting career in 2020, before graduating to Single Seaters.

 

Bearman made His racecar debut in the 2020 ADAC (German) Formula 4 series and scored His maiden win at the Hockenheimring. Later that year He made His debut in the Italian F4 series and also claimed victory at Vallelunga.

 

Twenty Twenty-One was a magical year for Bearman, as the Bloody brit’ dominated the Italian F4 Championship, sweeping the title with eleven wins! And then claimed the German F4 Championship title with a further six victories.

 

The following year, Oliver graduated to the FIA formula 3 Championship, driving for Prema Racing alongside Jack Crawford and Arthur Leclerc. Bearman wound-up third overall and claimed one W’, the Sprint race at thee Mighty Spa, aka Spa-Francorchamps. He also became a Ferrari Academy driver that year.

 

For 2023, Ollie made the step up to FIA Formula 2, continuing with Prema, alongside Mercedes Junior Driver Frederik Vesti. Bearman would claim sixth in the championship with four wins, including an impressive “double” at Baku. Becoming just the fourth F3 rookie to win both Sprint and feature races on the same weekend.

 

Continuing with Prema, now partnered by Mercedes Junior driver Andrea Kimi Antonelli, Bearman had a disappointing season, finishing 12th overall with three Sprint race wins to His credit.

 

Bearman missed the Jeddah and Baku rounds due to deputizing as reserve driver in F1. First in a last minute call-up for Carlos Sainz Jr. having an emergency appendectomy, where He finished a sensational seventh for Ferrari!

 

Next Bearman scored points again as Kevin Magnussen’s substitute at Azerbaijan, where the Dane’ was serving a one race ban. Finishing P10 for Haas. Then slithered home P12 at Sao Paolo after being given a 10 second penalty for colliding with Williams Franco Colapinto.

 

Jack Doohan

Team: BWT Alpine F1 Team

Nationality: Australian

Birthplace: Gold Coast, Queensland

DOB: January 20, 2003; Age: 22

Car NO. 7

 

Yes, Jack Doohan is the son of five times GP500 Grand Prix Motorcycle World Champion Mick Doohan. Interestingly, Jack began Go Karting at age nine with a go Kart given to Him by none other than  Michael Schumacher!

 

After a successful Karting career, Jack made His single seater debut at age 15 in 2018, when competing in the F4 British championship. Racing for Arden alongside Red Bull Junior Driver Dennis Hauger, Doohan finished fith overall with three wins.

 

Next Doohan raced in the F3 Asian series, finishing Vice Champion, Er runner-up twice consecutively. Along with racing for Double R Racing in the Euro Formula Open series.

 

Doohan then graduated to the FIA formula 3 Championship for 2020, where He had less than stellar results driving for HWA Racelab. The following year He moved to Trident, where one of His teammates was David Schumacher, son of Ralf.

 

Jack made history at the Spa-Francorchamps round by becoming the first driver to win two races in a weekend. Yet ultimately lost the F3 title to Dennis Hauger; who will contest His rookie Indy NXT campaign for Andretti global this year

After contesting the final two rounds of that year’s Formula 2 season, Doohan raced His first full FIA F2 season for Virtuosi Racing alongside Marino Sato in 2022. Doohan scored three poles and three wins enroute to sixth overall in the championship.

 

For 2023, Jack remained with virtuosi and finished third overall on the strength of two poles and three victories, before leaving F2 at season’s end.

 

Having been a Red bull Junior Driver between 2017 and 2021, Doohan switched to the Alpine Academy for 2022, and got His first taste of Formula 1 machinery in Qatar that year. Making His Free Practice (FP) debut at Mexico City, and then again at Abu Dhabi. Also participating in that year’s post Abu dhabi Young Drivers test.

 

Continuing His testing duties for Alpine the following year, Jack was named as the team’s reserve driver for the 2024 F1 season, before making His Formula 1 debut at the season finale Abu Dhabi Grand Prix for the ousted Esteban Ocon.

 

Not sure why I felt compelled to track Doohan’s F1 debut outing, other than I suppose I was curious how He’d acquit Himself? Thus recording the following weekend’s positions, beginning with Friday’s (Free Practice) FP1 outing: P19-19-14-20-15.

 

Thus finishing 15th in His first Grand Prix, where He dorve the team’s No. 61 entry, Arse-sumedly it’s reserve car number.

 

As now the pressure surely rachets up, with the season commencing Down Under on Home soil in Bloody Melbourne, March 16^th, Righto? Where the Aussie’s will be delirious over having two of their Mates’ on the Formula 1 grid… 

Alpine Swaps Drivers

But they weren’t trading Barbs like two Others were!

 

Following the finish of the Qatar Grand Prix, Alpine F1 severed its contract with Esteban Ocon, making way for the Frenchman to participate in the post-Abu Dhabi Grand Prix test session with His new team, Haas. For which Ocon posted on His Instagram account that He hadn’t wanted it to end this way…

 

Yet lost in all of the hubbub surrounding Bosom buddies Max and George. Arse-sumedly is graduate Alpine F1 Academy driver, and current reserve driver Jack Doohan making His Formula 1 race debut at this weekend’s season finale Abu Dhabi Grand Prix.

 

The 21yr old Aussie’ Doohan has scored a total of six wins and five poles during His two seasons in Formula 2 between 2022-23. Including winning from pole on Yas Isle in His final F2 race outing.

 

What interests me most is Racer’s Chris Medland noting that this perhaps is a tryout towards seeing if Doohan will indeed be racing for the Alpine F1 Team next year in earnest?

 

Even though He’s been announced as Pierre Gasly’s teammate for next season. Apparently there’s still the possibility of Franco Colapinto replacing Doohan?

 

Although Colapinto’s stock has taken a hit due to His abundance of crashes lately. Which ironically is why Williams jettisoned Logan Sargeant…

 

As this race outing allows Jack Doohan time to prepare for His Formula 1 career before racing Down Under at Melbourne for the start of next year’s F1 season, where you’d Arse-sume He’ll be under much media scrutiny – being His home race.

 

And yes, Jack is the son of five-times (MotoGP) GP500 World Champion Mick Doohan.

 

So keep an eye out for car number seven, since I’m pretty sure the Aussie’ will be overlooked this weekend. With the media focusing upon that “Yapping little Terrier” instead, Hya! 

F1: Alonso officially Starts His 400th Grand Prix

Frederico Suave’s name atop the IMS Scoring pylon.  (The Tomaso Collection)

 

“It’s a New, Endurance Record!”

 

Its strange how Formula 1 celebrates any and all milestones. Since initially I was slightly Cornfuzed over All of the hubbub commemorating Frederico Suave, aka Fred Alonso’s 400th Grand Prix weekend at Mexico City.

 

Especially since I’d already noted to Thyself that Alonso’s 400th Grand Prix Start, which is the more significant number to Mwah wouldn’t occur until December 1st at the Qatar Grand Prix.

 

Nonetheless, the number 400 be it Grands Prix weekends or Starts is absolutely mind blowing! Although I’d argue that this truly staggering statistic has been significantly watered down by the fact that Liberty Media has pushed the number of Grands Prix per season to an insane 24! And is seeking to nudge it to 25, WTF!

 

Conversely, I find it somewhat surprising that I still vividly remember Fernando Alonso’s Minardi PS01 chassis. Running a somewhat long in the tooth European badged Ford VJ Zetec R 3.0-litre normally aspirated V-10 lump’. For which its funny reading how the engine rated at 735bhp @16,000RPM’s was considered “obsolete!” Or definitely not cutting edge…

 

Having seen this tidy, mustashioed Minardi racecar in person at Indianapolis during His rookie Formula 1 campaign for the Minnowesqe back markers during the 2001 Formula 1 season. Along with another Ice Cream eating Finnish F1 rookie named Kimi Raikkonen.

 

Its funny reading how Oliver Bearman, Liam Lawson and Franco Colapinto weren’t even born yet! Or that Oscar Piastri was born the year Alonso began in formula 1. Or that Lando Noris and Guanyu Zhou were only two years old. And the list goes on and on…

 

Won’t try recapping Fernando’s entire Formula 1 career, or racing career in general, since it would take way too many pages. Since I still cannot scribble a short story here upon No Fenders. Nor do I know how much content my loyal readers want?

 

But I do tend to recall that Alonso took a year “off” following that Minardi campaign as Renault’s test driver; being the former Benetton F1 Team. And then in 2003, although I don’t recall the venue anymore, Alonso had a massive shunt, totally destroying His Renault racecar in shades of that horrific looking crash Martin Donnelly endured!

 

Alonso quickly became the scourge of Formula 1 for Mwah, since He ended Herr Schumacher’s F1 reign by having the audacity to become World champion back-to-back in 2005-06. And quickly became known by the moniker anointed by Blogmeister Miguel, Ferdi the Putz!

 

Although I knew the die had been casted that day when Michael Schumacher was powerless to get around Alonso at San Marino, with Alonso winning ahead of the German on Home soil…

 

Next Alonso, whom I’ve been calling Frederico Suave for years now, spent an acrimonious year at McLaren with Bosom Buddy Lewis Hamilton. For which I think we All know haw that went, Ci!

 

Alonso slinked back to Renault, who were on the decline for 2008-09, before moving to la Scuderia. Driving for Ferrari between 2010-14. With one of my favourite memories being Alonso unable to get around the lowly F1 rookie Vitaly VO5’ Petrov, ironically driving for Renault. And Alonso wildly gesticulating at Petrov was No. 1 after losing the 2010 F1 World championship to ‘lil Syd’ viddle, aka Sebastian Vettel!

 

Then there was the ill-fated move to McLaren Honda for 2015. Where Alonso famously complained about the Honda PU being worse than a GP2 engine! Even though Honda and its Red Bull Power Train derivative Power Units (PU) have been Uber successful since 2021!

 

Fernando then moved back to le Reggie for His Formula 1 return in 2021, albeit the team had now been rebranded as Alpine. With Alonso on a two year contract, being “ousted’ when the team thought it had successfully elevated Oscar Piastri to a race seat…

 

Fernando moved to Aston Martin for 2023, where He’s currently under contract until 2026, when He’ll become 45 years old!

 

As Alonso’s last Formula 1 Pole was secured at the 2012 German Grand Prix. With His latest win coming at His Home Spanish Grand Prix in 2013, both driving for Ferrari. With the Smarmy Spaniard currently ranked seventh overall with 32 career wins and 22 career Poles to date.

 

As I’ve gone “Hot ‘n Cold” over Alonso during His amazing racing career, mostly cold…

 

Although I thought it was great when Mclaren’s Zakery’ Brown and Alonso decided to skip the 2017 Monaco GP in favour of a “One-off” Indianapolis 500 entry with Andretti Autosport. As the Fernando mania was great for IndyCar! And Alonso was very impressive, before His Honda lump’ went Kuhblamoe with 21-laps remaining!

 

Yet it was even sweeter when What’s His Name, Err Kyle Kiser had the audacity to Bump Alonso from the field for the 2019 Indy 500 in the Minnowesqe Juncos Racing entry!

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2019/05/indy-500-dragonslayers.html

 

As Alonso’s reputation for Mwah was forever tarnished during Renault’s Crash Gate, when teammate Nelson Piquet Jr. deliberately crashed in order to trigger a Safety car deployment! Allowing Alonso to ultimately win the 2008 Singapore Grand Prix.

 

While I’ll admit I had to look it up to see if I remembered correctly that He was also involved in Espionage Gate? Better known as Stepney Gate,when in 2007, McLaren was fined a record $100 million for Nigel Stepney trying to bring Ferrari Intellectual Property to Woking. Whilst Renault got off with a knuckle wrap for its IP improprieties…

 

Alonso’s also had a knack of wearing out His welcome, with His three year McLaren contract mutually ended after one season. Or leaving Ferrari early, along with also departing McLaren early a second time, after His interest waned at the underperforming F1 outfit.

 

Alonso has also spent time in Sports Cars, both in IMSA and the FIA World Endurance Championship. (WEC) Having won the 2019 Rolex 24 driving for Wayne Taylor Racing. Along with the 24 Heurs du Mans back-to-back with Toyota between 2018-19. And winning the 2018-19 WEC Le Mans Prototypes (LMP) title with co-drivers Sebastien Buemi and Kazuki Nakajima.

 

As Alonso claimed the mantle for most Grands Prix starts when overtaking Kimi Raikkonen in 2022. For which the Finn had surplanted Rubens Barrichello, the first driver to make more than 300 Starts. While Alonso could conceivably become the first to a staggering 450! But Aston Martin would have to extend His contract even further…

http://www.nofenders.net/2022/10/f1-alonso-moves-into-p1.html 

When IndyCar takes a Back seat to Football, Again!

This Ain’t the car that Jimmy Harbaugh drove during the 2013 Indianapolis 500, albeit He did play for them during the 1990’s. (The Tomaso Collection)

 

Will the Alpine F1 Team run a Chiefs tribute car if they win another Super bowl?

 

Even though He’s only got half as many Super bowl rings as “Joe cool” has. Tonight’s Kansas City Chiefs starting QB Patrick Mahomes of the defending Super Bowl LVIII Champions has done what Joe Montana couldn’t! Even though it always seemed weird for Montana to be wearing a Chiefs uniform…

 

Canadian born actor Rob Reynolds leads an investment group along with fellow actor Rob McElhenney. With Otro Capital, RedBird Capital Investments and Maximum Effort Investments having bought a 24% share of Alpine F1 for $200m Euros ($218m USD) last year.

 

Also involved in the investment group are Kansas City chiefs Super bowl winning Quarterback Patrick Mahomes and Tight End Travis Kelce. Which would explain why Mahomes was on the Grid during Martin Billybob’ Brundle’s Formula 1 Grid Walk during this year’s Miami Grand Prix in May.

 

With Mahomes, Kelce and may be What’s Her Name? Oh Yeah, Taylor Swift joining MaxiMillions’ (Max Verstappen) as part of debutante F1 winner Lando Norris’s entourage that evening…

 

Other investors in this Star Studded group include actor Michael B. Jordan, professional Golfer Rory McIlroy and Olympic Boxing Gold medalist Anthony Joshua.

 

 

Terrible Tom, aka Tom Brady – 7X super bowl Champion is a minority owner in the FIA World Endurance Championship (WEC) Hertz Team Jota. Who run a brace of customer Porsche 963’s in the series premiere Hypercar class. As the team’s number 12 entry is directly taken from the past signal caller’s (QB) jersey worn during His playing days.

 

Ironically, it was the same No. 12 that scored Porsche’s first privateer victory at this year’s Six Hours of Spa race at Belgium’s legendous’ Spa-Francorchamps circuit. Where Callum Ilott, Will Stevens and Richard Lietz were victorious!

 

Whilst interestingly, the “list” price for a customer Porsche 963 is reportedly $2.9 million, Aye Karumba!

 

Lastly, since it’s now the fourth quarter on this No Fenders dribble and I’m running outta gas! Antonio Williams, a former Buffalo bills and New York giants NFL running Back. Along with a brief stint with the BC Lions of the Canadian Football League and currently a Free Agent. Invested in the SS-Green Light Xfinity Race team and driver Joe Graf Jr. in 2021, when still a member of the bills organization.

 

Williams, from North Carolina has been a NASCAR fan forever, and met Graf thru a mutual Acquaintance.

 

And that’s just some of the current and past names I’ve “Squirreled” away over the past several years now, after several False starts!

 

As say goodbye to IndyCar racing in September. Thanks to the new & improved FOX TV Dealio’, Frick!

 

As guess I’m one of the few who doesn’t give one iota over Freaking Football! Or any other “Stick ‘n Ball” sports.

 

Is it March, Yet? Hut-Hut, Oh Never Mind! 

F1: Farcical Qatar Grand Prix

No Uncle Bernaughty’, Max isn’t the Greatest! And why should I believe anything you say after your latest Tax Cheating scandal! For which I thoroughly enjoyed ‘Ol Martin Billybob’ Brundle give Yuhs the Mickey during His Sao Paulo Grid Walk…

 

Yeah, I know I’m late to thee party once again, but simply haven’t been able to Back-time posting this. And it still seems relevant since we’re off to another Desert, albeit I Don’t expect the same Heat issues in Nevada…

 

Thanks to Qatar being a night race, although it didn’t help much temperature wise! Which I’ll get to shortly. I was able to “watch”, Err listen to Qualie’, the Sprint race and the Grand Prix in their entirety here upon Ye West Coast, with action beginning at 9:55AM Pacific.

 

Although it’s always strange holding qualifying on a Friday, which once again MaxiMillions’ (Max Verstappen) claimed His tenth Pole position of the season, Yawn!

 

Although the Podium interviews was the funniest part of the whole weekend for Mwah! While the female “moderator” was interviewing then third place Oscar Piastri. She said mid sentence; we’ve just been told you’ve been demoted to sixth place for exceeding track linits, but it’s been lovely interviewing you…

 

Saturday’s Sprint race was enjoyable simply because the driver I’m becoming most intrigued upon, ergo rookie Aussie’ Oscar Piastri won.

 

Whilst I think it’s fitting that Verstappen won His third title during a Sprint race that was carried on ESPNews, Crickets?

 

But as everybody knows and probably remembers, it was the race circuit itself, along with the brutally Hot weather that garnered All of the Attenzinoe!

 

Being a brand new racing surface, the first time the fresh Ash-fault’ had been raced upon, along with the extreme temperatures, naturally the oil rose to the surface. As I thought I even heard Verstappen saying the track had Mucho “Slippery Liquids” upon it! As where are Yuhs Uncle Bobby? With Maximilian saing it made them look silly! Making me wonder if this was a contributor to the countless track limits violations?

 

While the pyramid shaped kerbs were worrying to Pirelli, with track limits being altered by simply painting them, along with Pirelli mandating a three stop race and a maximum of 18-laps on any tyre compound.

 

All of which made me immediately think of Michelin Gate! Y’all know that farcical 2005 United States Grand Prix at Indianapolis. Remember that Y’all?

 

And although overall this was handled much better. According to F1 Grizzled Journo’ Joe Saward, Pirelli had warned the FIA of these exact issues back in January.

 

With the maximum 18-lap strategy requiring drivers to go flat out and run Qualie’ laps every lap! Along with temperatures exceeding 50 Celcius in the cockpit = more than 122 degrees Fahrenheit with the race lasting One Hour and 28 minutes! It’s simply amazing we didn’t have any serious racing accidents due to the drivers physical conditions whilst roasting in this sauna for nearly ninety minutes!

 

Obviously you’ve heard or read about Lance Stroll, Esteban Ocon and both Williams drivers Heat related issues. Whilst I thought I heard Fernando Alonso asking for a bucket of cold water to be poured upon Him during His pit stop being denied over His In-car radio. Since I recall Sky Sports F1 lead presenter Kroftie’, aka David Kroft musing about the Ice Bucket challenge…

 

While Fernando’s Aston Martin teammate Lance Stroll gets some sort of award for worst behaved F1 driver of the weekend! Beginning on Friday when forcibly shoving His trainer out of His way when being instructed for the mandatory F1 driver weighing, after Lance had failed to advance out of Q1’.

 

Then Lance was one of two F1 drivers helped into an ambulance following the race. Wit the Kuhnuck’ later stating that He’d been drifting in and out of consciousness during the race due to His blood pressure dropping due to the extreme Heat!

 

With the FIA investigating Stroll for breech of driver “Etiquette” at Qatar, and it’ll be interesting to see if anything comes of this?

 

Naturally, Stroll got off with a Slap upon His Hand after apologizing to the FIA, and was simply given a reprimand…

 

Alpine’s Esteban Ocon revealed following the race that He’d vomited inside His Helmet twice during the race due to the excessive Heat!

 

While the Williams duo of Alex Albon and Logan Sargeant suffered the worst! As Albon also needed to be assisted to an ambulance immediately following the race before being treated for excessive Heat exposure! While Sargeant retired during the race while suffering from Dehydration due partially to having fought Flu-like symptoms during the Grand Prix weekend.

 

And Mercedes George Russell was spotted driving down the straights? With His Hands off of His steering wheel while trying to fan any shread of air to cool His body! And the list goes on and on. As Verstappen even joked about anybody needing a wheelchair? While Piastri laid on the Green rooms floor with McLaren teammate Lando Norris all waiting to go back out into the Heat for the podium celebrations…

 

As Norris, Russell and Ferrari’s Charles Leclerc All said that the race had hit the threshold for Heat and something needed to be done to ensure this not happening again!

 

Whilst many F1 Fans have called for Qatar to be scrapped. But we All know that Ain’t gona happen! Especially if the rumours of Liberty Media receiving $45 million per year for it’s ten years contract!

 

Since Liberty Media seems to agree with the former F1 Supremo Bernie Eccelstone about How the show must go On!

 

Oh Yeah, almost forgot. Max Verstappen won His third F1 World Championship in-a-row, Yawn! As can you say rinse, lather, repeat for the next two years? Thanks to engine development being “Frozen” for Red Bull’s benefit until the new E-E-E-lectricfied’ Power Units are introduced in 2026, Boring! 

A Brief look at this year’s Formula 1 Rookie Crop

But who’ll ultimately come out on Top between these three Rookies?

 

Logan Sargeant

Williams Racing

Car No. 2

DOB: 12/31/00, Age 22

 

Florida’s Logan Sargeant becomes the first Yank’ Driver in Formula 1 since 2016 Indianapolis 500 Rookie winner Alexander Rossi’s very brief five race stint for Manor Marussia F1 in 2015. As Sargeant finished fourth Overall in last year’s FIA Formula 2 Championship to secure the necessary points to secure His requisite FIA Super license. For which if accomplishing, then Williams Team Principal Jost Capito had promised to elevate Logan to an F1 drive at Williams, as the departing Nicholas Latifi’s replacement.

 

And instead of rehashing what I already scribbled here upon No Fenders, I’ll direct Y’all to my previous Logan Sargeant tome instead.

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2022/10/fia-f2-americas-next-formula-1-driver.html

 

Nyck de Vries

Scuderia AlphaTauri

Car No. 21

DOB: 2/6/95, Age 28

 

For Mwah, Nyck de Vries is the most underrated of our trio, or more likely most overlooked. As the totally deserving Dutchman looked set to not get a proper chance in Formula 1.

 

As De Vreis won the 2019 FIA Formula  2 Championship and then went on to win the 2020-21 Formula E Championship for Mercedes. Along with winning both the 2014 Eurocup Formula Renault 2.0 and Formula Renault 2.0 Alps titles.

 

De Vries got His chance to finally debut in F1 at last year’s Italian Grand Prix, substituting for Williams Alex Albon who needed an emergency Appendectomy operation!

 

Where Nyck dually impressed everybody with His ninth place finish, scoring two F1 points in His maidn Grand Prix. Subsequently being snapphed up by Red Bull, whose got some other “Dutchie” on it’s books. As the departing Pierre Gasly’s replacement alongside Yuki Tsunoda. For which I’ll be interested to see if De Vries outperforms the “Veteran” Tsunoda.

 

Oscar Piastri

McLaren F1 Team

Car No. 81

DOB: 4/6/01, Age 21

 

Oscar Piastri made News last year during Formula One’s Summer Break, when the Aussie’ informed Alpine He wouldn’t be driving for them!

 

Like many FIA Formula 2 Champions, Piastri who won the 2021 title was spending a year on the sidelines as Alpine’s Test and Reserve Driver, and was expected to fill Fernando Alonso’s seat in 2023 initially. As Alpine had to make a decision on who they’d keep this year, for which we All know Alonso solved that by unexpectedly jumping to Aston Martin.

 

Yet Alpine hand’t done enough to keep it’sYoung Gun, and ‘Ol Zakery Brown who made waves on both sides of the Atlantic secured Oscar’s services as DannyRic’s, aka Daniel Ricciardo’s replacement, for which the FIA’s Contract Recognition Board subsequently ruled in McLaren’s favour.

 

Piastri, a potential F1 Prodigy, won the Formula Renault Eurocup, Fia Formula 3 and FIA Formula 2 Championships consecutively between 2019-2021. And I think He’s the first driver since Charles Leclerc to win the F3 and F2 titles back-to-back?

 

Thus it will be interesting to see how much the young Australian can push McLaren’s Superstar driver Lando Norris, who seemingly hasn’t been challenged by a teammate yet? Although I think Carlos Sainz, Jr. must have given Him a Hard time before moving onto Ferrari. While I still Don’t understand what happened to Ricciardo at McLaren…