Thursday, April 30, 2020

AUTOS: Droning on 'bout Rolls Royces

John Lennon’s mostly forgotten Psychedelic Rolls Royce Phantom V. (Image source:
As I'd sure like having that Tommy-mobile' as my personal chariot! Now if I could just find some change in thou Bloody seat cushions, Chuh-Ching! Or should that be Tilt? Especially since I Ain't No Bloody Pinball Wizard...

Suppose it's largely due to having read; Err listened and then just serenaded Y'all with my epic No Fenders Who I Am tome regarding The Who's Pete Townshend that I had those somewhat faded Rolls Royces Customized by British Rockers on thou Noggin', Eh?

Although it turned out to be the Band's Frontman roger Daltrey instead of Messer Townshend who'd been asked to put his personal touches upon not one, but two Rolls Royce Wraiths, for which once again thoust world 'O FauxNetics' initially Fooled Me! Since Lucy' coos Wraiths like Raifs to Mwah, causing me to get Fooled Once Again; Hya!

As it's the Tommy-mobile' Wraith that most interests Mwah, for which was Auctioned off for Charity Wayback in 2017, reportedly fetching some $208,000+ Quid; Err Gory Sterling Pounds for The Teenage Cancer Trust. For which both of Messer Daltrey's customized Wraiths benefitted this Charity.

Whilst on a side note, I find it entertaining to Mwah how refreshing I find The Who's A Man in A Purple Dress song, which seems virtually new since it Ain't ever played upon Ye Radio, even if it's now nearly 14 years old, Yikes! 

But try finding out any definitive information on the entire collection of nine One-off' Rolls Royce Wraiths to be completed. With the only other pair being mentioned in the original Car and Driver magazine's article on thou initial batch 'O four being by Ray Davies of The Kinks and Giles Martin, son of Sir George Martin - known by some as Thee Fifth Beatle...

Since it's Sad that nearly three years later after having first learned of this project via said Car and Driver article, that I cannot find out anything substantive further on who the other five Wraiths were done by? Other than I did spot something mentioning The Stones Ronnie Woods being involved in this project...

Yet customized Rolls Royces-- aren't exactly anything new, since I immediately Flashed Back upon Arguably the most famous customized Rolls, having actually seen it in Thy Flesh in my younger years! 'Ol John Lennon's Psychedelic Rolls royce Phantom V on Display at Expo '86 Up North Eh! In Bloody Vancouver, BC.

As I'm not sure which is worse?  The fact that somewheres' 34yrs later in another Shoebox in Thy Bungalow by The Sea languishes that paper Passport Book given to everybody with blank pages to stamp All the Exhibits you'd visited. Which naturally Lennon's Rolls Royce made thou Cut. Uhm, Passed Ye Audition, Eh!

Or having attended on what unbeknownst to Mwah And Snowbyrd MJ' would be the event's largest single day crowd of 212,000 Gory Spectators; Aye Karumba!

Since somehow, I Don't think those Days are coming back Anytime Soon, Eh?

Tuesday, April 28, 2020

A Prince, Slowhand' and A Pair of Ecclestone's

Ah, where's 'Ol Dirty Harry when Yuhs needs him to sort out this Sordid Tale? Like Did's I Fire Five Shots or Six? And I Didn't shoot No Deputy...

Yeah, you're probably All getting tired of my constant Droning on 'bout the never ending mist of Synchronicity Shrouding thoust Isle 'O Nofendersville...

But it's funny how it's constantly Zapping Mwah, akin to static electricity! Having just scribbled briefly 'bout 'Ol Slowhand, aka EC' or Eric Clapton being chummy with 'Ol Uncle Bernaughty, ergo Bernard Charles Ecclestone, and Shuhzamm!

Clapton's name first came alight for Mwah most recently when transfixed whilst reading; err listening to Pete Townshend's most enjoyable memoir Who I am, where he notes helping EC' battle his Heroin Addiction, including putting together a Benefit Concert  to entice Slowhand' back into making his Gee-Tar "Gently Weep!"

As this show was billed as The Rainbow Concert, appropriately taking place at London's newly anointed Rainbow Theatre in January 1973, in what originally was The Finns bury Park Astoria Cinema in 1930.

And was Billed as Clapton's Comeback concert following his playing Hiatus during this portion of his battling various Addictions...

Also having now just learned that The Who's Long Live Rock song was in Deference to a Concert at this cherished London landmark...

But that's just the Prequel to this No Fenders rant, since what Peaked'; Hmm? Where'd 'Ol Dan-Dan-Danicker' G-O? Whilst ironically thoust Disco Queen 'O IndyCar's was once Unflatteringly compared with kitchen Appliances by none other than that Dastardly Uncle Bernaughty! But I Digress...

Nope, what Peaked my interest in the Vanity Fair article was the inclusion of the name Ecclestone, albeit ultimately both Bernie and Petra play Supporting Roles in thou Sordid Tale of Forgeries!

As Petra Ecclestone, Bernie's youngest Daughter currently, since I've just learned his latest wife Fabiana Flosi is expecting to make the 89yr old former F1 Supremo a Poppa again, Yikes!

Hmm, somehow I cannot picture the 89yr old Billionaire getting his Hands Dirty changing Nappies'; Oh Never Mind!

Uhm, back to Petra who married a British Bloke named James Stunt Wayback in 2011, where none other than Slowhand' was one of the many musical guests at the couple's Fairytale wedding that Bernie shelled out $19 million for; Aye Karumba!

As Petra wanted to have the Biggest, Splashiest Mansion in La-La Land' for the couple - Shilled out $85m in Cash, Sight Unseen for The Manor! Reportedly Los Angeles's largest home at a whopping 57,000 square feet and formerly the home of Aaron and Candy Spelling. Petra subsequently sold the property in 2019 for nearly $120m.

Petra also introduced Hubby Jimbo' into thou rarefied world of Art, whom reportedly took like A Duck to Water in not only learning about the masters, i.e.; Rembrandt, Monet, Dali, Picasso, etc, but also began his passion for collecting and profiting upon Art acquisitions.

Yet how the mighty fall, Eh? Since after Petra Divorced James in 2017, the Billionaire has seen his world come ah-crashin' Down mightly, for which not surprisingly he Blames Uncle bernaughty!

But Y'all are saying where does the Prince come into this? And Prince Who?  Well that's where the story get's juicy for Mwah, as Messer Stunt who claims to be a good Buddy of the Prince of Whales, a bloke named Charles is Arse-sumedly now Persona Non Grata with Thee Prince!

As Stunt, for which some are claiming his last name is most apropos for this Caper! Began by James loaning 17 pieces of cherished Artwork to Prince Charles Prince's Foundation Charity, for which several pieces were promptly put on display at Dumfries House in Scotland in prominent locations.

Yet Scandal Broke out in Fall, 2019 when that British Rag The Daily Mail Broke the Headlines that Prince Charles had been Scammed! With four pieces of this loaned collection being Fakes!

And although James called Bernie and Petra Nasty Names during the Divorce proceedings,
including calling Bernie a nasty four letter C-word in court! Alas, once again Uncle Bernaughty who's No Stranger to Court Trials comes out Smelling like a Rose!

As who did James think he was Dealing with? As Ecclestone Senior's Nom de Plume "the Teflon Man" should have been warning enough! After all didn't he know that Bernie Bought his way out of a Bribery Trial in Germany for a cool $100 million when?

Whilst obviously Nobody pulls A Fast One upon the Royal Family! As long live Rock indeed!

Wednesday, April 22, 2020

BOOKS: Who Am I Exerts

See Me, Hear Me? Hopefully this is the Rolls Royce Wraith that The Who's Frontman Roger Daltrey customized in 2017 for Charity, featuring The Who's Tommy's album cover on its hood, Err Bloody Bonnet! (Image source:
Tell me Who Are You? I really wanna know Messer Townshend…

So what does a Blind Word Butcher do when he’s Ah-waitin’ the arrival of his new Confuzer’, prior to the un-anticipated vast learning curve he knows he’ll be Painfully Forced to suffer thru? Especially when taking an eleven days sabbatical away from spending far too much time upon Zed Confuzer?

Yeah, your humble No Fenders Scribe Tomaso reverted to the far easier & enjoyable recreation of listening to The Who’s "Guiding Light" Pete Townsend’s Autobiography that only took him a mere 17yrs to complete; CRIKEYS!

Although now I’ve learned its actually speeled Townshend, Righto? Which Lucy', my veritable Screen Reader enjoys pro-nouncin' as Towns Shend, Ack! Especially when Yuhs live in thoust world 'O FauxNetics' - Yuck-Yuck-Yuck...

As I'm tryin' to poond' out Ye foundations for this No Fenders story before it All Slips Away, having finished this most excellante Book Wayback on February 29th, a day after Mario Andretti's 80th Birthday; But I Digress...

The book quite thoroughly chronicles Pete's entire life up to the date of publishing, now eight years ago. Beginning with his fraught childhood of being sent away by his parents following World War II, along with his musical talent apparently coming from his Pops', who played in a Royal Air Force (RAF) Band.

But for Mwah, the book doesn't really start until he meets later Band-mates John Entwistle at school, since I believe Pete mentions John taking him underneath his protective Wing' at age 12, while latter Frontman and Singer Roger Daltrey is a menacing competitor with his own Band.

For when Pete nervously goes to see about playing in Roger's band, is confronted by a stunning Blonde crying on her way out, and tells Pete to tell Roger it's either Her or his Band!

And the rest as they say is History, as Pete soon became the lead guitar player for Roger's Band, with Daltrey becoming the singer, although I think per Tipicali, a la Neil Peart joining RUSh', the Band really didn't go anywheres' until the addition of Keith Moon...

As I simply devoured this CD Audiobook which is appropriately read by Pete Townshend himself, largely part of what made it so enjoyable! With his never ending self induced chuckles. Weighing in at 15-Discs and some 19hrs long, I finished it in a week's duration since I simply couldn't wait to find out what happens next!

And while I totally enjoyed Townshend's self-effacing prose over how the Band and his life progress over the years, I was most taken with a few Nuggets gleamed from his tales.

The first bit should be obvious why I've enjoyed it so much, along with the fact of learning about a totally unknown musician, albeit he passed away way too soon at the age of 42 Wayback in 1977!

The narrative begins with Pete describing how he and his then wife Karen attend a Jazz Club in London I believe, circa 1968 to hear this Fantastic Musician named Roland Kirk, who amazingly played multiple instruments at a time, primarily a trio of personally modified saxophones, albeit equally adept on the piano.

near the front whispered in his wife's ear I wish he would quit playing the piano - and go back to playing saxophones with his (Jazz) Band.

Which Pete then claims Roland menacingly looked at him and dually when back to playing with the Band while sending several sneering glances afterwards his direction to which Pete hollered Sorry Row-land' in typical British sardonic wit. Swearing somehow Kirk heard his whisper!

A year later in Boston Me Thinks? Ironically the very same Roland Kirk would be The Who's Opening Act at the Funky Boston Tea Market concert venue, which reportedly had a very short lifespan between 1967-70, albeit it's latter location now reputedly is the sight of a House of The Blues concert venue.

But back to those three nights in Boston, where Kirk opened on the first leg of The Who's Tommy Concert Tour of 1969-70, for which these concerts took place in early May of '69, prior to Woodstock...

Pete regales us by saying after the first night's show, Kirk came storming into the Dressing Room and Growled where's the Skinny White Mother Fucker who sang about me being Deaf Dumb and Blind! To which Townshend said he stayed totally quiet and didn't say anything, but apparently Kirk heard him breathing and grabbed Him, to which Pete said Sorry Row-land.

Kirk than exploded once again and Yelled Damn, you're that Skinny White Mother Fucker who Didn't like my Piano Playing a year ago! To which Pete then tells us how Roland stuck around to listen to the entire Tommy Concert All three Nights.

Oh yeah, Did I forget to tells Yuhs what makes this so memorable to Mwah? In case you didn't know, the late Roland Kirk, who later went by the name Rahsann Roland Kirk was totally Blind! And had been so since he was two years old. As Pete also mentions how Kirk assails him with his Quip of I may be Blind, but I sure Ain't Deaf or Dumb!

As Messer Townshend then laments how musicians listen, Blind People apparently listen Acutely!

Interestingly, and after the fact, since it's not in the book. I learned that some Funnyman Extraordinaire and former Tonight Show Host named Jay Leno was Kirk's Opening Act Wayback in '75 and Roland took pleasure in announcing Here's A Brother Who Knows All 'bout...

Roland's also credited with pioneering the throaty, talk induced breathy Flute playing style that inspired some Bloke by the name Ian Anderson. Who'd go onto great Fame carving out his own musical career as Frontman for the Rock 'n Roll Band Jethro Tull! Arse-sumedly best known for Thar Hit Song Aqualung...

Another interesting tidbit was Pete discussing his looking for inspiration spiritually, which I enjoy knowing isn't the typical Christian Doctrine. As Townshend began his longtime association with the teachings of Indian Spiritual Guru Meher Baba in 1967, and I believe he was planning to visit him in India, but Baba Died before the trip commenced.

Then once again finding myself tying life to racing, I've since mused how Townshend's nearly career ending wrist injury made me think of Robin Miller's Hero Herc', nee Jim Hurtubise. For whom I tend to recall chose to have his hands molded to grip a steering wheel after savagely injured in a Fiery Wreck!

As Pete recalls how he'd sailed one of his sailboats to a remote island to join Karen and was involved in a nasty bicycling accident, for which he'd borrowed to ride across the island.

Yet after hitting a nasty bump and being thrown from said bicycle, which subsequently ended up striking him hard as he laid on the pavement!

The surgeon he'd been rushed to gave him two choices. He could have his wrist permanently set for either strumming a guitar or holding change!

As Townshend notes strumming's vertical and holding change in your palm's horizontal, for which obviously Pete chose to continue being able to play a guitar - Fortunately for us!

While the Book covers various facets of Kieth Moon's Antics, regaling us over his Holding Court with a Harem of Young lasses', with the funniest bit for Mwah being how Keith wasn't scared at all by the Wood-be Punk Rockers acting Tough Guys routine. When Pete mentions how Moon took him for a ride in one of his limos' along with Tough-boy Billy Idol one night.

Whilst John Entwistle basically played like a Statue on Stage, but his fingers were always flying and his Bass rhythm was profoundly solid and seemingly made more with less! For which I'm now quite infatuated by John's standout Bass playing on such Who tracks like The Real Me. For which I can definitely understand a few of his many nicknames, i.e.; The Ox and most certainly thunderfingers!

As it's funny how it took reading; Err listening to the Book to Discern that the One & Only Who album I own is arguably one of their less impressive one's. Having thought for over 30yrs, Huh? That it was a Pete Townshend Solo album I'd purchased, Arse-sumedly since I've always associated the Who with Roger Daltrey's signature vocals.

As I'd say that the Eminence Front song is the 1982 It's Hard album's Biggest Hit Song for an album that Daltrey was not only critical of, but claimed that it was the only song worth releasing on the whole Bloody album; YOUCH!

Ironically It's Hard would be the final Who Studio Album Entwistle played on before his shock Death in 2002 in lost wages' aka Las Vegas at Age 57 the night before the Band was slated to begin its latest Tour of North America.

In another tiny Karmic wafting 'O Serendipity, little did I know that two Decades later, having bought this record specifically in '86 on vinyl since I liked the eminence Front single - so much When I purchased my one and only Stereo System, a Kenwood Rack Stereo system which I know Randall, Thy No Fenders Moniker King coolly called Bitchin' Wayback when...

That I'd attend my One 'N Only Who Concert at the Key Arena in Seattle, WA. Although it will forever be The Coliseum to Mwah. When Claudio' and I attended The Who's Endless Wire Tour on Oct 11, 2006, supporting the Band's first Studio Album since It's Hard, 24yrs prior.

It was a great concert with Roger Daltrey, Pete Townshend & his Brother Simon on Rhythm ("Backing") guitar. John Rabbit' Bundrick on Keyboards and Zach Starky on Drums.

Although I tend to mostly just remember as being Blind and trying to climb the stairs to our seats towards the end of the opening act without stepping on too many people's feet, Yikes! Playing Thru...

But we were All their for Thar Greatest Hits, for which I do still remember Teenage Wasteland and Won't Get Fooled Again being played. Along with Pinball Wizard and probably Eminence Front? And may be from the new album A Man in A Purple Dress?

"Meet the New Boss,
Same as the Old Boss,
No-No, We Won't Get Fooled Again!"