Cornholed, Again!

And He misses the Pile…

 

Yeah, know Y’all are saying where’s my riveting Canadian GP or Gateway IndyCar race reports eh? But Yuhs know how I roll here in Nofendersville…

 

Once again, I got Cornholed! Just over a fortnight ago, (Sunday, June 1st) when chaos was breaking out in Barcelona, ci!

 

Supposedly ESPNews was replaying the Spanish GP at 2:30PM. (Pacific) As I long ago stopped getting up at Oh Dark 30 for Formula 1, Ole!

 

I turned Thy Telie’ on early, since I often aim the remote the wrong way and have to play the turn the cable box on game, being Blind Y’all…

 

Yep, Thar was some riveting Cornhole game being played, which I must say is like my trying to watch a Darts match, with the bean bags going womp-womp-womp! Followed by what sounded like somebody calling a High School tennis game TV announcers noise.

 

Without knowing the time, 2:30PM came ‘n went, and when I finally checked the time since this riveting Cornhole match was now onto another game, it was 2:43PM. And in the words of George Crybaby’ Russell, What The Flock? Language George, the FIA doesn’t like cuss words, Tsk-Tsk!

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2021/04/welcome-to-formula-ones-pariah-club.html

 

Hmm, may be the F1 replay won’t start until 3:00PM? Since the Emilia Romagna rebroadcast had a similar problema, with some college sports program running 20mins extra before somebody apparently woke up and began the F1 replay. Which I “watched” an hour of the Max parade before going to bed…

 

Checking my Zap-2-It TV guide again for the umpteenth time. Since it was past 3PM and Cornhole was still going strong, with the scintillating score being 8-6, Urgh! It said that ESPNews was also replaying the Spanish GP at 7PM. And even though I’d accidently heard who the winner was, Sigh! I thought I’d watch it anyways, since this is the only reason I keep my outlandishly overpriced Spectrum Cable TV service. Now that Fox Sports has taken over MotoGP and doesn’t replay it until the middle of the night, but I digress…

 

Nope, Stee-rike Two! As there was some riveting womens college baseball game going on, in the middle of the fifth inning involving Arkansas I believe, Swell! So I just went and “watched” Err listened to the Youtube Highlights “package” instead. Since I’d waisted far too mucho time trying to catch the Gory F1 replay!

 

Guessing y’all know what happened in the closing stages of the Spanish GP race highlights, ci?

 

But once again, I missed All of the Fireworks surrounding who I’m now calling Max Blunderhead! Being just one more blatant example of why I don’t like Maximus Hothead! And I totally agree with 2016 F1 World Champion Nico Rosberg’s assessment that Verstappen should have been given a black flag for purposely ramming Russell! As a ten second time penalty doesn’t send a severe enough message to a driver well known for His outrageous, and dangerous driving antics…

 

Have scribbled previously that I’ve never disputed Verstappen’s driving talent. It’s just His unrealistic behaviour of a toddler throwing His bottle out of the pram whenever He doesn’t get His way on-track that rankles me!

 

As His petulant spearing of Russell after having been told by His race engineer to give George the place back seems reminiscent of Senna deliberately crashing Prost at Suzuka! Or Michael Schumacher squeezing Rubino’, nee Rubens Barrichello into the wall at some 180mph at the Hungaroring in 2010! Where the German received a ten place grid penalty for the next race at thee Mighty Spa’; Spa-Francorchamps for His reckless, Err Ruthless driving behaviour.

 

Which like I’ve said before, Senna and Schumacher are the two closest drivers Max Blunderhead seems to emulate on-track, meaning I should be a fan of His…

 

And how can you not enjoy Max’s off track candidness? Saying that Red Bull teammate Yuki Tsunoda is not a pancake! In regards to the Japanese driver completely struggling with the diabolical RB21 chassis, for which Liam Lawson was demoted from, and arguably should have never been so hastily promoted to the Big Bullx’ outfit after only eleven Grands Prix experience…

 

Or Max saying He’ll bring some tissues next time after Russell’s remarks regarding His driving antics.

 

Yet Maximus Hothead’s temper tantrum is inexcusable, and once again Red Bull is doing nothing about it! Since what would be the draconian punishment to Tsunoda, Lawson or the other ‘lil Bullz’ (Racing Bulls) rookie driver Isack Hadjar for disobeying a direct order from the race team?

 

Max needs to be sat down for one Grand Prix if the sport really wishes to set the proper example for not tolerating such egregious driving behaviour! Where the Austrian Grand Prix minus Verstappen would definitely send a message! Or at the very least, a ten grid place penalty at Montreal.

 

Thus, I found Thyself hoping Maxwell silver Hammer would pick up one more needed penalty point at Circuit Gilles Villeneuve to enforce a one race ban at Spielberg. Although knowing Maxwell Silver Hammer’s to shrewd for that…

 

Yet it serves Max right that He won’t secure a fifth consecutive F1 world championship this year, since He doesn’t deserve it!

 

Meanwhile, thanks to F1 being on the eastern seaboard, and Indy being a night race. I actually got to “watch”, Err listen to most of the Canadian Grand Prix live on Thy Telie’, i.e.; both Friday practice sessions, Qualie and the race.

Apparently the word Lando Norris was using over the weekend on Il Notre Dam was inevitable. Which surely, I should have expected it would be inevitable for Max Blunderhead and George F-bombs R Us Russell to be on the front row together again for Sunday’s race.

 

Max was very “Cool” in the post qualifying interview with Jack Vanilla, aka Jacques Villeneuve. Replying He always wants to be on pole…

 

Then Russell was a Cheeky Bugger! And  I’m 86% certain the crowd Booed Him when He said He’s got a few more points on His license to play with. For which all I could say was Youch!

 

Or as ‘lil Davey Malukas used to say during the Team Penske Bus Bros dazes’, shots fired!

 

And then during Martin BillyBob’ Brundle’s legendous’ Grid Walk, Brundle cheekily told Carlos Sainz Jr. I promise you Carlos, your not late as He went scurrying by, Youza, good one Martin!

 

Yet the race was anti-climatic at the front with Russell leading wire-to-wire from pole, with Max second and Kimi Antonelli scoring His maiden podium.

 

While all of the fireworks occurred on lap 67 of 70 when Norris made an ill-advised overtaking attempt upon McLaren teammate, and F1 championship points leader Oscar Piastri. With Norris shunting and Piastri finishing fourth after a cautionary pitstop to change tyres, at least that’s what I thought I heard the Sky sports Pundits say? With the race finishing under caution… 

F1: Alonso officially Starts His 400th Grand Prix

Frederico Suave’s name atop the IMS Scoring pylon.  (The Tomaso Collection)

 

“It’s a New, Endurance Record!”

 

Its strange how Formula 1 celebrates any and all milestones. Since initially I was slightly Cornfuzed over All of the hubbub commemorating Frederico Suave, aka Fred Alonso’s 400th Grand Prix weekend at Mexico City.

 

Especially since I’d already noted to Thyself that Alonso’s 400th Grand Prix Start, which is the more significant number to Mwah wouldn’t occur until December 1st at the Qatar Grand Prix.

 

Nonetheless, the number 400 be it Grands Prix weekends or Starts is absolutely mind blowing! Although I’d argue that this truly staggering statistic has been significantly watered down by the fact that Liberty Media has pushed the number of Grands Prix per season to an insane 24! And is seeking to nudge it to 25, WTF!

 

Conversely, I find it somewhat surprising that I still vividly remember Fernando Alonso’s Minardi PS01 chassis. Running a somewhat long in the tooth European badged Ford VJ Zetec R 3.0-litre normally aspirated V-10 lump’. For which its funny reading how the engine rated at 735bhp @16,000RPM’s was considered “obsolete!” Or definitely not cutting edge…

 

Having seen this tidy, mustashioed Minardi racecar in person at Indianapolis during His rookie Formula 1 campaign for the Minnowesqe back markers during the 2001 Formula 1 season. Along with another Ice Cream eating Finnish F1 rookie named Kimi Raikkonen.

 

Its funny reading how Oliver Bearman, Liam Lawson and Franco Colapinto weren’t even born yet! Or that Oscar Piastri was born the year Alonso began in formula 1. Or that Lando Noris and Guanyu Zhou were only two years old. And the list goes on and on…

 

Won’t try recapping Fernando’s entire Formula 1 career, or racing career in general, since it would take way too many pages. Since I still cannot scribble a short story here upon No Fenders. Nor do I know how much content my loyal readers want?

 

But I do tend to recall that Alonso took a year “off” following that Minardi campaign as Renault’s test driver; being the former Benetton F1 Team. And then in 2003, although I don’t recall the venue anymore, Alonso had a massive shunt, totally destroying His Renault racecar in shades of that horrific looking crash Martin Donnelly endured!

 

Alonso quickly became the scourge of Formula 1 for Mwah, since He ended Herr Schumacher’s F1 reign by having the audacity to become World champion back-to-back in 2005-06. And quickly became known by the moniker anointed by Blogmeister Miguel, Ferdi the Putz!

 

Although I knew the die had been casted that day when Michael Schumacher was powerless to get around Alonso at San Marino, with Alonso winning ahead of the German on Home soil…

 

Next Alonso, whom I’ve been calling Frederico Suave for years now, spent an acrimonious year at McLaren with Bosom Buddy Lewis Hamilton. For which I think we All know haw that went, Ci!

 

Alonso slinked back to Renault, who were on the decline for 2008-09, before moving to la Scuderia. Driving for Ferrari between 2010-14. With one of my favourite memories being Alonso unable to get around the lowly F1 rookie Vitaly VO5’ Petrov, ironically driving for Renault. And Alonso wildly gesticulating at Petrov was No. 1 after losing the 2010 F1 World championship to ‘lil Syd’ viddle, aka Sebastian Vettel!

 

Then there was the ill-fated move to McLaren Honda for 2015. Where Alonso famously complained about the Honda PU being worse than a GP2 engine! Even though Honda and its Red Bull Power Train derivative Power Units (PU) have been Uber successful since 2021!

 

Fernando then moved back to le Reggie for His Formula 1 return in 2021, albeit the team had now been rebranded as Alpine. With Alonso on a two year contract, being “ousted’ when the team thought it had successfully elevated Oscar Piastri to a race seat…

 

Fernando moved to Aston Martin for 2023, where He’s currently under contract until 2026, when He’ll become 45 years old!

 

As Alonso’s last Formula 1 Pole was secured at the 2012 German Grand Prix. With His latest win coming at His Home Spanish Grand Prix in 2013, both driving for Ferrari. With the Smarmy Spaniard currently ranked seventh overall with 32 career wins and 22 career Poles to date.

 

As I’ve gone “Hot ‘n Cold” over Alonso during His amazing racing career, mostly cold…

 

Although I thought it was great when Mclaren’s Zakery’ Brown and Alonso decided to skip the 2017 Monaco GP in favour of a “One-off” Indianapolis 500 entry with Andretti Autosport. As the Fernando mania was great for IndyCar! And Alonso was very impressive, before His Honda lump’ went Kuhblamoe with 21-laps remaining!

 

Yet it was even sweeter when What’s His Name, Err Kyle Kiser had the audacity to Bump Alonso from the field for the 2019 Indy 500 in the Minnowesqe Juncos Racing entry!

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2019/05/indy-500-dragonslayers.html

 

As Alonso’s reputation for Mwah was forever tarnished during Renault’s Crash Gate, when teammate Nelson Piquet Jr. deliberately crashed in order to trigger a Safety car deployment! Allowing Alonso to ultimately win the 2008 Singapore Grand Prix.

 

While I’ll admit I had to look it up to see if I remembered correctly that He was also involved in Espionage Gate? Better known as Stepney Gate,when in 2007, McLaren was fined a record $100 million for Nigel Stepney trying to bring Ferrari Intellectual Property to Woking. Whilst Renault got off with a knuckle wrap for its IP improprieties…

 

Alonso’s also had a knack of wearing out His welcome, with His three year McLaren contract mutually ended after one season. Or leaving Ferrari early, along with also departing McLaren early a second time, after His interest waned at the underperforming F1 outfit.

 

Alonso has also spent time in Sports Cars, both in IMSA and the FIA World Endurance Championship. (WEC) Having won the 2019 Rolex 24 driving for Wayne Taylor Racing. Along with the 24 Heurs du Mans back-to-back with Toyota between 2018-19. And winning the 2018-19 WEC Le Mans Prototypes (LMP) title with co-drivers Sebastien Buemi and Kazuki Nakajima.

 

As Alonso claimed the mantle for most Grands Prix starts when overtaking Kimi Raikkonen in 2022. For which the Finn had surplanted Rubens Barrichello, the first driver to make more than 300 Starts. While Alonso could conceivably become the first to a staggering 450! But Aston Martin would have to extend His contract even further…

http://www.nofenders.net/2022/10/f1-alonso-moves-into-p1.html 

Pato Who, Indeed!

If you thought this May’s Kroger promotion in Indianapolis was Big. You should have seen the phalanx ‘O Fans in Mexico City awaiting me Mark! (The Tomaso Collection)

 

“What Has Brown Done for You lately” Mark?

 

Even though supposedly Pato Who? And Penske’s Chief “Entertainment” cough-Cough! Officer Mark Miles have “Buried the Hatchet”. I’d like to think that Miles has woke up and Smelled the Fiesta! Even if it was for a “Formula 1” driver, its still Nuts!

 

Since have you ever heard of Fans arriving twelve hours before a racing driver arrives for a promotional event at a Shopping Mall the day before the weekend’s track activities begin?

 

While its priceless that McLaren Boss Zak Brown was wearing a Pato Who? Ballcap during Pato’s one hour (Free Practice) FP-1 session Friday at the Autodromo Hermanos Rodriguez, Ole!

 

As Y’all can read All about it in the link below written by the AP’s Jenna Fryer.

 

https://www.winnipegfreepress.com/sports/autoracing/2024/10/28/pato-oward-takes-mexico-city-by-storm-proving-the-indycar-driver-can-carry-series-in-home-country 

Hey Mark Miles, Did You See Pato Who in Mexico?

Yuhs know, IndyCar Chief “Excitement” Officer’s favourite Driver…

 

Initially planned to pen my two pesos worth about IndyCar’s Mega’ Charter system’s announcement in a No Fenders post title Charter This! As I’m mildly intrigued over how the 23XI Racing and Front Row Motorsport Anti-trust lawsuit plays out…

 

Although as Racer’s Marshall Pruett has previously noted. IndyCar’s Charter is like a plain Cheese pizza with zero toppings right now!

 

Thus, instead I found myself more inspired to scribble something about my Numero Uno IndyCar driver now affectionately known as Pato Who? As perhaps Y’all have seen the billboard in Indiana on I-465.

 

As Patricio Pato’ O’Ward just made His latest Formula 1 (Free Practice) FP1 outing for McLaren in Mexico City’s Autodromo Hermanos Rodriguez, Ariva-Ariva-Ariva!

 

As Pato wound-up P13 with a time of 1:19.295 vs. twelfth place teenage sensation Andrea Kimi Antonelli. With the 18yr old recording a lap of 1:19.200 for Mercedes.

 

The next quickest “rookie” was Aston Martin’s Felipe Drugovich P18. With Robert Shwartzman 19th for Sauber and Oliver Bearman dead last in P20 for Ferrari. While positions 14-17 were filled by Haas’s Kevin Magnussen, Alpine’s Pierre Gasly, Lance Stroll in the other Aston Martin and Williams Alexander Albon respectively. Although Albon was caught-up in a collision with Ollie’ Bearman.

 

Yet Lando Norris, whose McLaren O’Ward was driving sounds like a total Prick! Saying Pato knows what He’s there for, testing! And He’s not supposed to damage the car. And we could have chosen anywhere for Him to test at, so He should be happy its in Mexico…

 

O’Ward first came upon my collective radar during His 2018 Indy Lights tilt, when I was rootin’ for the Mexican to beat Andretti Autosport teammate Colton Herta for the title, which Pato did!

 

After making His IndyCar debut at the 2018 season finale at Sonoma for Harding Racing. Where Pato qualified an impressive fifth and finished ninth! Following a lack of funding, Pato was released from Harding Steinbrenner Racing and moved to Carlin.

 

Following a very brief, abortive IndyCar beginning with Carlin, remember them Y’all? Pato joined the Red bull Junior Driver Academy with hopes of joining Formula 1. Yet due to the miniscule (2018) Indy Lights field, Pato’s championship points were cut in half, leaving O’Ward unable to qualify for the necessary FIA Super license.

 

Hired to drive for Arrow McLaren SP in 2020 alongside Oliver Askew. A one Mr. Zakery Brown promised Pato a Formula 1 ride if He won an IndyCar race, which O’Ward promptly did at Texas Motor Speedway, His debutante IndyCar win just two days shy of His 22nd birthday!

 

Pato got His first taste of F1 in a demonstration drive at Laguna Seca in November, 2021 behind the wheel of Mika Hakkinen’s MP4/13. With the Double World Champion on hand to give advice…

 

In December, O’Ward tested the team’s current McLaren MCL35 chassis during the yearly Abu Dhabi season finale Young Guns test, where He finished a very impressive fourth fastest!

 

For Fall, 2022, Pato, along with some IndyCar Hotschue’ named Alex Palou carried out two test sessions for McLaren in Barcelona and Austria. Then Pato made His Free Practice (FP) session debut at Abu Dhabi that December.

 

O’Ward made another Free Practice outing the following year once again at Abu Dhabi, a circuit He must know fairly well now, ci? Before being named as one of McLaren’s reserve drivers this year. Even though O’Ward’s Day Job is firmly cemented in IndyCar’s.

 

Thus by my unofficial reckoning, Pato’s FP-1 outing at Mexico City marks the first time two Mexicans have been on a Formula 1 circuit simultaneously since fellow countrymen Checo’, nee Sergio Perez and Esteban Gutierrez raced in the 2016 season finale Abu Dhabi Grand Prix, Ole!

 

Ironically Gutierrez, remember Him Y’all? Also hails from Monterey Mexico, a la O’ward. With the former Sauber and Haas F1 driver Gutierrez having raced for Glickenhaus Racing in the FIA World Enduance Championship. (WEC) Along with CrowdStrike Racing by APR in IMSA’s LMP2 category during 2023. Whilst I’ve got zero clue what Gutierrez is up to this season?

 

As Pato says its been a dream of His to race on Home soil for quite awhile now, and I can only surmise that He received a warm reception in Mexico city, even if everybody showed up to root for Sergio Perez. As who knows? Pato will probably drive an F1 car again for McLaren, since He’s got nothing on His calendar until next March…

 

As that was before I read the news that O’Ward will now run His Arrow Mclaren IndyCar in a demonstration run during next January’s Formula E Mexico City E-Prix event. Along with also sampling one of McLaren’s Formula E racecars also in a demonstration run. Did you hear that Mark Miles, Ole!

 

Whilst Pato desperately wishes to participate in next year’s inaugural Mexico City NASCAR Cup event, for which I haven’t checked if it clashes with His Day Job? Along with oddly, His Boss Zak Brown mentioning O’Ward contesting the Day-Toner’ 500 some day… 

Still just One Seat remaining in Formula 1?

As whose got the Biggest Wallet of All?

 

Leading up to the United States Grand Prix at the Circuit Of The Americas, nee COTA weekend. Scuttlebutt suggested that current Sauber F1 driver Valtteri Bottas was on Pole to retain His seat another year at Sauber. Being the lone, unconfirmed seat for the 2025 F1 season. With the seat remaining open after Carlos Sainz, Jr. rejected Audi’s offer, and went to Williams instead for 2025.

 

Although some had said not so fast Valtteri! With the likes of the promising Formula 2 points leader Gabriel Bortoleto being mentioned. Along with current Williams F1 rookie sensation Franco Colapinto. With Mick Schumacher being a perceived longshot.

 

Next, an even more distant long shot was added to the “Spin cycle”. With current Haas F1 driver Kevin Magnussen’s name being mentioned…

 

Interestingly all three of these Young Turk’ drivers are “tied” to other Formula 1 outfits. With Bortoleto being a McLaren Development Driver member, and Colapinto a Williams F1 Academy driver. Whilst Mick is the current Mercedes GP test and reserve driver. Along with being a current Alpine Sports Car Pilote’ in the FIA World Endurance Championship. (WEC)

 

Yet initial scuttlebutt claimed that Bortoleto and Colapinto weren’t available, even though Williams F1 Boss James Vowels has said He’s open to loaning out Colapinto next year; naturally for the right price!

 

While former Formula 1 driver Christian Danner has told Schumacher to go to IndyCar if “Plan A” doesn’t work out! And Hans-Joachim Stuck advises Mick against joining the Sauber/Audi project.

 

As it’ll be somewhat interesting to “See” how this pans out. Or will it just be anti-climatic with the obligatory press release telling us how excited Bottas is to get to work at Sauber next season? For which we all hold our breaths, as Mattia Binotto says He’d like to confirm the second driver by mid-November…

 

Meanwhile in other Audi ownership news regarding Sauber. Surely you’ve all read or heard that management shook up the pecking order during this summer. With the dismissals of Audi’s Sauber project manager (CEO) Andreas Seidl and Sauber Chairman of the Board Oliver Hossman.

 

Installing former Ferrari Team Principal Mattia Binotto as the new team leader. As Binotto, who shortly turns 55 becomes it’s Chief Operation and Chief Technical Officer. While Gernot dollner replaces Hossman as Chairman of all Sauber companies.

 

Longtime Red Bull Racing F1 member, and the team’s current Sporting director Jonathan Wheatley, whose been at the team forever! Will become Sauber’s new Team Principal next year. As the staff exodus from Red Bull continues. Hmm, like Rats leaving a Sinking Ship?

 

Whilst two more key team additions have been announced. With former Ferrari F1 Sporting director and strategist  Inaki Rueda, who previously worked with Binotto. As Rueda will become the team’s new Sporting Director, punting Beat Zehnder to a role with the legacy side of Sauber.

 

While Giampaolo Dall’Ara will become the team’s new Race Engineering boss at the Hinwil factory. Not to be cornfuzed with the legednous’ Giampaolo Dallara, the 87yr old proprietor of Dallara Automobili.

 

As Dall’Ara is a former Sauber employee who’s been running His own consulting company since 2016, according to Racer’s Chris Medland.

 

Now the only question remaining, is can Sauber pull itself up from last upon the F1 Grid?

 

But that was before reading more scuttlebutt regarding Liam Lawson’s arrival at Racing Bulls as Daniel Ricciardo’s replacement. Suggesting it could trigger a contest between the Kiwi’ and RB teammate Yuki Tsunoda, to potentially become Max Verstappen’s teammate next year. As the rumours persist that Checo’, aka Sergio Perez is still on shaky ground regarding His new two year contract extension. With Red Bull’s Pied Piper Chris Horner sending mixed signals about will He, won’t He return next year?

 

While there was quite the kerfuffle upon social media over what appeared to be Lawson giving Perez the middle finger at 300 clicks’. (186mph) With the Kiwi’ youngster telling Checo He’s Number One in Mexico City, Ole! As the two protagonists fought over P17 on the grid…

 

Thus, if one of the two Racing Bulls drivers were promoted, this would leave a seat open for current FIA F2 and Red Bull Junior driver Isack Hajar. So may be there’s still two seats not confirmed for 2025 yet? You make the call.

 

While the latest rumour over the Brazilian Grand Prix weekend was that McLaren has agreed to release Gabriel Bortoledo from His contract in order to go to Audi on a long term deal. As Sauber made official what had been reported on Wednesday, November 6th, selecting Bordoleto as Nico Hulkenberg’s teammate beginning in 2025.

 

Meaning that “serve” has moved to Red Bull to decide over who’ll partner Max next year? With Horner having dropped by the Williams Hospitality “Villa” over the Brazilian Grand Prix weekend to chat with Team Principal James Vowles over Franco Colapinto’s availability… 

Two Top Racing Teams Implode!

Or should the number have been three?

 

Alright, it wasn’t quite that bad, but I had to come up with some clever title, Eh?

 

As sorry if you’re still looking for some riveting IndyCar recap of our latest Oval race, as I’ve got Zip, Nada Nothing! Since I’ve still got the weekend of Toronto and the Hungaroring on my mind…

 

It was Uber funny how Mark Gravelly’ James, IndyCar Radio’s lead announcer jumped All over how Kyle Moyer, Scott McLaughlin’s strategist had been saying during the red flag period at Toronto. How the team All works together, and All of the drivers get on with each other. As it’s All for one, i.e.; Team Penske, Blah-Blah-Blah…

 

As that was before Wilbur’ “Mr. Ed” Power made a Boneheaded decision to attempt passing teammate ScottyMac’ in Turn-5 where nobody had been able to pass!

 

As I absolutely loved how McLaughlin sarcastically clapped as Power went by before climbing into the AMR safety vehicle! Not to mention McLaughlin rightly being still Hot under the collar when interviewed after the race’s end!

 

With Davey Hamilton belabouring the point repeatedly how Power went from being 33-points behind points leader Alex Palou, to now being 49-points adrift. (Following Toronto) Not to mention All three Penske’s being inside the Top-10 before resuming racing after the red flag….

 

Oh yeah, almost forgot about the G-R-R-reat Josef Newgarden  self inflicting another wound upon His wilting championship hopes! As Schlick’ ran wide or off track at race’s end and finished P11, the highest finishing Penske. As Power was P12 and McLaughlin thru NO fault of His own, was scored one lap down in P16.

 

Whilst how ‘bout that “Davey” Malukas in the Oh Kanaduh’ Tragically Hip mobile, aboard the No. 66 Meyer Shank Racing entry. As Malukas finished sixth, His first Top-10 of His truncated season…

 

While I still marvel over Theo Pourschair’s Madcap scramble across thoust Gory Puddle from France to the Toronto paddock with 62mins to spare! Before being the highest finishing McLaren in 14th.

 

Meanwhile, Colton Herta serenely led 81 of the 85-laps, effectively leading wire-to-wire! His first win in 41 races, since the spring Indy GP of 2022, Yikes!

 

Dixon went from P15 to third and Palou went from P18 to fourth! With three Ganassi cars in the Top-5, with Marcus Armstrong fifth. While All three Penske’s summarily imploded due to self-annihilation…

 

Meanwhile you could definitely say that the Unga-Boring’, ergo Hungarian Grand Prix was anything but boring this year!

 

Although I must confess I fell asleep midway thru the race’s encore presentation on le Deusch’, nee ESPN2 Sunday evening. And thus missed the whole McLaren pitstop shenanigans. Which basically boiled down to the team not firmly explaining to Lando Norris their intent of Him resuming second after this final pitstop!

 

As Racer’s Chris Medalin’s pointed out. The Delta between pitstops at Budapest is 20 seconds. And Lewis Hamilton who was coming like a freight train had carved the gap down to 22.5 seconds when McLaren told Lando to Box-box-box! Thus leaving Norris out any longer would have conceivably saw Sir Lewis jump the Mclaren for second place…

 

I was rootin’ for Oscar Piastri to win His maiden Grand Prix. But with Norris’s indignant self preservation over the final twenty laps reaching a crescendo. I have to say that Piastri’s win felt overly anti-climatic to Mwah!

 

And then there was vintage Maximus’ Hothead on display thru the entire race. Beginning with Max wingeing over His in-car radio about having to give second place bact to Lando after advancing with an off-track pass. As Verstappen got more ‘n more cranked up All race long, boiling over with His poorly judged pass upon Hamilton for third place! Seeing Max’s Red Bull getting airbourne; No Red Bull gives you wings Jokes here! Before Verstappen was forced to settle for fifth place. Ooh, poor Max. And no, I’m not gonna F-Off Max!

 

As understandably, but not deserved. Piastri was subdued over the radio and during the podium interviews following His first win. As McLaren really made a mess of this! But I enjoyed hearing the Australian National Anthem being played for the first time in several years. Since I didn’t bother to “watch”, Err listen to DannyRic’s (Ricciardo) Monaco victory in 2021… 

Porsche’s modern day Open Wheel Racing exploits

With Stuttgart triumphing in Formula 1 briefly…

 

The 1980’s were heady times for Porsche, with it’s multi-pronged foray’s into single seater racing, a discipline that Stuttgart wasn’t renown for…

 

Thee Ronster’, aka Ron Dennis shrewdly enticed Mansour Ojjeh, owner of TAG Electronics to foot the bill for a brand new 1.5-litre turbocharged engine. Although McLaren’s Nicholson massaged Cossie’ (Cosworth) normally aspirated 3.0-litre DFV V-8’s were still competitive vs. the turbo revolution in 1982. Obviously the writing was on the wall…

 

The 90 degrees 1.5-litre V-6 Porsche designed engine, built to McLaren’s Technical Director John Barnard’s tight packaging specifics, in order to mate to it’s revolutionary MP4/2 chassis were ultimately fast-tracked with a hastily converted MP4/1E racecar for the end of the ’83 F1 season, making it’s debut at the Dutch Grand Prix.

 

The McLaren MP4 was the first carbon fiber composite racecar to compete in Formula 1, for which the MP4/2 was an evolution designed specifically for the TAG-Porsch turbo engine, since it’s predecessor had been built for the aging Cosworth DFV V-8.

 

Upon the firing of thee “Professor”, aka Alain Prost from Renault, Dennis immediately snapped up the Frenchman’s services in favour of Wattie’, aka John Watson. And with Prost joining Niki Lauda, the rest was History!

 

And although initially Porsche was weary of having it’s name upon the engine due to fears of uncompetitiveness. Obviously this quickly changed, as Prost and Lauda won a total of eleven races, with Prost outscoring Lauda 6-5. Yet it was Niki “The Rat” Lauda winning the 1984 F1 World Championship by a solitary point ahead of teammate Prost!

 

McLaren would also win the first of two, consecutive F1 Constructors Championships with the TAG-Porsche engine that season. With the Woking based outfit utilizing updated MP4/2B and MP4/2C chassis for the 1985-86 Formula 1 season.

 

Prost would claim His first F1 Drivers titles in 1985, before clinching a second consecutive crown in ’86. With “The Professor” ultimately outscoring Lauda 16-6 for wins over the duo’s three years before Lauda retired from F1.

 

For ’87, Prost got a new teammate, with ‘lil Stevie Johnson, aka Stefan Johansson joining McLaren for one year. Yet the once dominant TAG-Porsche V-6 turbo was nearing the end of it’s lifecycle, especially with Honda’s V-6 turbo becoming a real threat!

 

Alas, McLaren could only muster three wins with it’s MP4/3 in 1987, all by Prost vs. Williams/Honda’s nine. Along with two more Lotus/Honda victories for a total of eleven by the Japanese rival! In what would be the final year of competition for the TAG-Porsche lump’.

 

As McLaren would score 25 wins and seven Poles enroute to three F1 Drivers titles and two Constructors Championships between 1983-87.

 

When I think of Porsche and Indy Cars, I immediately think of the iconic green and white Quaker State March Porsche that Teo Fabi drove during the late 1980’s. For which I’ve kept an unbuilt Monogram? 1:24 or 1:25 scale plastic model kit forever, which I’d planned to build when I still had my eyesight! Yet I’m getting ahead of myself.

 

Porsche actually planned to race at the Indianapolis 500 in 1980, in a purpose built IndyCar chassis. As Ted Field commissioned Eagle IndyCar Designer Roman Slobodynskyj to pen His Interscope IR01.

 

This single seater chassis was intended to be powered by a air cooled Flat six turbocharged variant akin to what the Porsche 935 was powered by. And not being a stressed member engine, the IR01 consisted of a tube frame rear end “cradle” to house the Porsche engine.

 

Originally running to stock block turbo boost regulations of 55-inches. Word got out about how fast the racecar was, after setting an unofficial lap record at IMS sister track Ontario during testing! With fellow USAC competitors effectively lobbying USAC to reduce the Porsche’s boost to 48-inches and effectively neutering the Porsche’s “advantage”. With Porsche quickly pulling the plug upon this effort.

 

Porsche returned to IndyCar in earnest in the Fall of 1987, with the project led by the late Al Holbert.

 

As Porsche introduced it’s own carbon fibre chassis dubbed the 2708 in 1987. Which made it’s debut at Laguna Seca wit big Al’ (Unser) at it’s controls, finishing a quiet P24 after retiring on lap-7.

 

Yet Porsche quicky dropped it’s own 2708 IndyCar chassis for a March 88C customer chassis the following season. With Teo Fabi scoring six Top-10 finishes and a best of fourth at Nazareth enroute to tenth overall during Porsche’s first Full season campaign.

 

As the Porsche North America IndyCar entity reached it’s zenith during the 1989 CART PPG IndyCar World Series season. Once again with Teo Fabi as it’s driver.

 

Yet during Porsche’s most successful season Al Holbert wouldn’t get to witness Teo Fabi scoring Porsche’s first Pole position ironically at my Home track of Portland International Raceway during the 1989 Budweiser/G.I. Joes 200. Or Fabi subsequently scoring Porsche’s lone IndyCar victory also from Pole at the Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course later that summer.

 

As Holbert would perish in a private plane accident after taking off from Columbus, Ohio following the IMSA Columbus street race on September 30, 1988. With Teo Fabi finishing an impressive fourth overall in the championship during the ’89 IndyCar season.

 

Porsche then expanded to a two car entry during it’s final IndyCar season (1990) with Fabi being joined by “Gentleman John” Andretti, with the duo racing in white and blue Fosters livery.

 

Yet John Andretti could only muster tenth overall in the championship with a pair of fith place finishes at Cleveland and Vancouver, BC.

 

With Fabi scoring one Pole at Denver and the team’s solitary podium, a third place finish at the Meadowlands enroute to P14 in the standings. Before Porsche withdrew from IndyCar at season’s end.

 

Porsche then made one last, dismal attempt at returning to formula 1 for the ’91 season, which spectacularly failed! Providing what Alan Jenkins, then Footwork Arrows Technical Director says was basically a “reheated”, warmed-over V-12 lump!

 

Claiming the 3.5-litre normally aspirated V-12 unit was nothing more than two old 90-degrees V-6 turbo motors mated together minus the turbocharging units.

 

Yet the Porsche 3500 V-12 motor was reportedly overweight, lacked Horsepower and suffered from Oil starvation, with Footwork failing to qualify for half of the races entered that season! Before the team dumped the Porsche V-12 in favour of customer Cosworth DFR V-8’s instead.

 

As Porsche has since solely focused upon Sports Car racing, although it’s planned attempt to return to F1 in 2026 as an engine supplier to Red Bull ultimately failed due to Stuttgart wanting a 50-50 partnership with Red Bull. Whilst Seester’ VW owned Audi has bought the Sauber F1 Team, which will become a Full werks’ Audi effort in 2026… 

RETRO: McLaren, Sixty Years in the Making

Although I think they’ve already run All of their special tribute liveries celebrating this milestone. And should just be in customary papaya at Austin and Las Vegas?

 

I first thought about this milestone in May when Arrow McLaren ran it’s four Indianapolis 500 entries with distinctly different, but enjoyable “throwback” liveries Honouring it’s 60th Anniversary. With each of it’s three fulltime IndyCar drivers running an unique livery mimicking it’s winning Le Mans, Monaco and Indy 500 victories.

 

And since I haven’t really been paying much Attenzione to Formula 1, I’d forgotten that this year’s F1 chassis designation is MCL60, also in deference to you know what…

 

Although I did muse to myself that it had been worth getting up early to “watch”, Err listen to the British Grand Prix just to hear the roar of the partisan, Sellout crowd’s delight of McLaren’s Lando Norris taking the lead over Max Verstappen! Even if everybody knew it would be short lived.

 

Yet I find it bemusing that nowhere can I find the actual date in 1963 when Bruce McLaren Motor Racing Ltd was founded. As it’s just sometime in Bloody 1963. Which ironically was a busy year with the “Birth” of Lamborghini, plus the debut of the Porsche 911 Panzerwagon.

 

Whilst Bruce McLaren would have just celebrated His 86th Birthday this August 30th. Being just over a half year  younger than El Capitano’, nee Roger Penske. As Roger would sell His Zerex Special Sports Car to McLaren at the end of 1963.

 

Yet instead of recreating another crooked wheel. I’ll simply point Y’all towards an old Bruce McLaren No Fenders tome instead…

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2010/06/bruce-mclaren-40-years-after.html

 

Bruce McLaren made His team’s debut at the 1966 Monaco Grand Prix, making me wonder what they’ll do to celebrate that? Going onto score McLaren’s first of an eventual 183 Grands Prix victories to date at the 1968 Belgian Grand Prix.

 

Yet McLaren’s early dominance came in Sports Cars instead, in what forever will be remembered as “The Bruce & Denny Show!” When Bruce and teammate Dennis Hulme, the 1967 Formula 1 World Champion decimated the Can Am Championship between 1967-1971. When those Uber Nasty ground poundin’ McLaren seven litre, or perhaps eight litres? Chevrolet Big Block Can Am monsters were nearly unbeatable! Before Roger Penske’s Porsche 917’s dethrowned them…

 

Sadly Bruce died in a testing accident at Goodwood behind the wheel of a McLaren M8D Can Am car, with Teddy Mayer taking over the team. As Mayer would lead Mclaren to it’s first Formula 1 Drivers and Constructors titles in 1974 with Emmo’, nee Emmerson Fittipaldi. While James Hunt went onto win the ’76 F1 Drivers title.

 

McLaren also dabbled in Indy Cars during the 1970’s, winning the Indianapolis 500 three times. First with Penske Racing and Mark Donohue in a McLaren chassis in 1972. Before Lone Star JR’, aka Johnny Rutherford won outright for Mclaren in 1974 & 1976.

 

Yet the team fell on hard times and, first quit IndyCar at the end of 1979. Next in ‘81, at title sponsor Marlboro’s insistence, McLaren merged with Ron Dennis’s Project 4 Racing outfit, which competed in Formula 2, Formula 3 and the BMW Procar Championships. With Dennis becoming Team Principal before ultimately buying out it’s other partners.

 

Dennis coaxed Niki “the Rat” Lauda out of retirement in ’82, guiding McLaren into becoming a Formula 1 Juggernaut.

 

As McLaren with F1 Designer John Barnard brought the first All Carbon composite chassis to the sport in 1984. The same year that began a remarkable stretch of seven F1 Drivers and six F1 Constructors Championships between 1984-1991.

 

As Niki Lauda, Alain Prost and Ayrton Senna were the winning drivers. First using the successful TAG-Porsche 1.5 litre V-6 and Honda V-6 Turbos thru 1988. And then Honda’s normally aspirated V-10 and V-12 lumps’, before Honda withdrew from Formula 1 at the end of 1992, sound familiar?

 

 

Another dry spell passed in 1998-99 when Mika-the-Finn’ (Hakkinen) won the F1 World Championship back-to-back aboard Adrian Newey “penned” racecars.

 

Newey left McLaren for Red Bull in 2006 and still leads the Design Office today, with Red Bull becoming a major force in formula 1 ever since.

 

Whilst let’s not forget 2007’s Spy Gate episode, when Mclaren was fined a record $100 million by the FIA for having had illegally obtained Ferrari technical documents. Along with being stripped of that year’s Constructors standing!

 

Or how Fernando Alonsos and Lewis Hamilton’s infighting lost McLaren the World Championship to former McLaren driver Kimi Raikkonen, now wearing Scarlet (Ferrari) Overalls…

 

And then in what’s been McLaren’s last Hurrah to date. Thee Ronster’s (Dennis) final driver prodigy Lewis Hamilton won the first of His eventual seven F1 World Championships in 2008, being McLaren’s latest Championship!

 

Dennis and then one of it’s other major McLaren Shareholder Mansour Ojjeh, who Dennis had initially sold 50% of McLaren to in 1983, had a falling out reportedly in 2013. Which effectively led to Ron Dennis being pushed out of the company He’d resurrected in 2014.

 

Having  previously ceded day-to-day control of McLaren to Martin Whitmarsh in 2009. And having lost a bitter lawsuit to resume control of McLaren in 2016, Dennis sold the remainder of His Shares in 2017, ending the Dennis era. After having failed to win the Board’s backing for His resuming control of McLaren…

 

Zak Brown was made Executive Director of the McLaren Technology Group in November, 2016, and CEO of McLaren Racing in 2018.

 

As I feel there’s no reason to rehash McLaren’s failed bid with Werks’ Honda Power Units between 2015-18. When Fernando Alonso who’d returned to McLaren a second time infamously called them worse than a F2 engine over His In-car radio! Although ultimately Honda Power Units have now won the last two F1 World Championships and soon to capture their third consecutively with Red Bull…

 

Yet McLaren has only one one Formula 1 race at Monza with DannyRic’, aka Daniel Ricciardo at Monza in 2022, nine years after Jenson Button’s final victory while driving for McLaren.

 

Yet McLaren’s current F1 lineup of Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri are currently making waves, and are one of the few teams to at least give Max Verstappen and Red Bull something to think about…

 

Across thoust Bloody Puddle Stateside, Zakery Brown’s IndyCar exploits are well known in the never ending Alex Palou dispute, one of the 43 drivers Brown’s inked contracts with!

 

Having returned McLaren to IndyCar initially in 2017 with a “One-off” for Alonso at the Indianapolis 500 driving for Andretti Autosport.

 

Then first parterning with Sam Schmidt and Rick Peterson’s IndyCar team thru taking effective control in 2022 when purchasing 75% of then Arrow McLaren SP. With grand ambitions of becoming one of IndyCar’s “Big four”.

 

McLaren is also involved in Extreme E and Formula E, not to mention it’s fantastic road cars, which I’d Arse-sume was Dennis’s vision of turning McLaren into another Ferrari. As the company’s certainly come a long way from the “Garragist” era of Bruce McLaren’s humble beginnings some sixty years ago… 

F1: Verstappen’s Win Streak Ends!

Push ‘em Back Carlos, Way Back!

 

Ah, doesn’t Singapore seem like such a long time ago, Eh? Especially after that vengeful, utterly Dominant weekend Smackdown MaxiMillions’ just Threw down upon us at Suzuka!

 

Although as I still, somewhat bask in the afterglow, or is that Aspen Glow? Two immediate thoughts following the Singapore Grand Prix came to mind. First I couldn’t even remember when I last “watched”, Err listened to a Grand Prix? Which I believe it must have been the Canadian Grand Prix at Circuit Gilles villeneive Wayback’ on Bloody June 18th!

 

Along with is it wrong to wanting the Pole sitter to lead wire-to-wire? Especially after “Switching Off” from following Formula 1 for two months for this very same reason. Ergo the MaxiMillions factor…

 

I’m a Huge Fan of Carlos Sainz, Jr. for several reasons. As the Spaniard just seems to keep His Head down and get on with the job without All of the wingeing the Brat Pack does! Not to mention He seems to be treated like a Number Two driver at la Scuderia. Thus my desire for Carlos to win from Pole at Singapore!

 

Not to mention how Uber’ refreshing it was for Verstappen to not only not be a factor for the race win, along with barely being mentioned during the broadcast. But the icing on the cake was Max being legitimately passed on-track by five different drivers; George Russell, Lando Norris, Lewis Hamilton, Charles Leclerc and Esteban Ocon when dropping back from second to seventh!

 

Still don’t quite understand Sky Sports Pundits Kroftie’, aka David Kroft and Martin BilyBob’ Brundle’s comments about Ferrari sacrificing Leclerc to ensure a win when the Monegasque was dutifully following Sainz in second place. Although may be this had something to do with Sainz masterfully managing the gap, since I thought they said His lead was only 0.7-seconds ahead of Leclerc at this point of the race? As Leclerc was the only driver in the Top-10 to start on Soft tyres vs. everbody else on mediums.

 

Although reportedly Ferrari told Leclerc first they needed Him to drop behind by three seconds, and then further told Him they needed it to be a five second gap.

 

On lap-20 the Safety Car came out for Williams Logan Sargeant who Hit the wall! Seeing the leaders dive into the Pits, with Ferrari and Mercedes Double Stacking their drivers, notably to Leclerc’s detriment. While the two Red Bulls stayed out, seeing Max and Checo’ (Perez) inherit P2-4.

 

Yet Sainz still led when the Safety Car pulled off on lap-22 and began His Master Class performance of driving as slow as possible to keep His lead, but preserve His Hard tyres, intending to nurse them to the finish…

 

And then things got interesting when the Virtual Safety Car (VCS) was deployed on lap-43 for Ocon’s smoking Alpine, having limped off track. As Mercedes rolled the dice and decided to go for broke! Pitting both drivers on lap-44 for fresh medium Pirelli rubber whilst Sainz, Norris and Leclerc stayed on-track.

 

On lap-50 Carlos held a slim 1.3 second lead ahead of Norris; 5.5 seconds on Scuderia teammate Leclerc, and 9.8 seconds over Russell with Hamilton 12.6 seconds adrift. Yet the two Silver arrows were cutting sizeable chunks of time each lap, with Russell and Hamilton some 1.5-2 seconds quicker per lap! As believe it was lap-53 when I began crossing my fingers and chanting Carlos! Since the Mercedes were ah-Comin’ Fast, and I really wanted Sainz to win!

 

First Russell, and then Hamilton passed third place Leclerc, whose tyres were shot. And that’s when it got Uber’ sstrange for Mwah! As I unexpectedly began chanting Lando-Lando-Lando! Whom happens to be one of the F1 Brat Pack members I dislike…

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2022/10/formula-ones-brat-pack-young-turks.html

 

As lap-59 of 62 saw Sainz holding a razor slim 0.7-second lead over Norris. Who in turn was holding up Russell and Hamilton, with the top four only 1.7 seconds adrift! As Norris masterfully held off Russell, with Hamilton heard on His in-car radio telling George (Russell) to Hurry Up!

 

But it was all for naught, as Russell brushed the wall on the final lap before crashing with Sainz leading Norris across the stripe with Hamilton third. And it was interesting hearing Norris during the podium interview repeatedly saying that Sainz had been generous with DRS, letting Lando stay within the required one second gap to enable the Drag Reduction System to work. Which the Englishman thought not only helped Him hold off Hamilton for second, but helped Carlos win also…

 

Leclerc held onto fourth and Verstappen finished fith. While I was most impressed with AlphaTauri rookie Liam Lawson who finished an excellent ninth, scoring His maiden Formula 1 points in only His third F1 race.

 

And with Lawson’s more experienced teammate Yuki Tsunoda pulling off on lap-1, surely this just adds more pressure for AlphaTauri to retain the Japanese driver next year…

 

Sainz definitely lived up to His nickname of “Smooth Operator” by controlling the race while making His Hard Pirelli tyres last 42-laps! With Carlos popular win ending Verstappen’s consecutive win streak of ten races, and Red Bull’s run of 15 consecutive W’s. While Carlos took His second victory for Ferrari, and the Prancing Horse’s first W’ since Leclerc’s win at Austria last July.

 

As now the $64k question is will Max go back to dominating the remainder of the F1 calendar, or can Ferrari, McLaren and Mercedes continue Harrying Verstappen and keep Red Bull off the top step of the podium?

 

Hmm, why is that ‘Ol Supertramp song Dreamer, You know You’re A Dreamer popping into my Head right now?