FOX in The Hen House

Y’all knew that one was Ah-Comin’, didn’t Yuhs? Now where’s Foghorn Leghorn, I Say, I Say?

 

First ‘n Foremost, suppose I should remind Y’all that I’m apparently a card carrying member of les Miserables, Wee-Wee…

 

As its old news now that the FOX Corporation has acquired one third ownership in Penske Entertainment, i.e.; IndyCar, the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and IMS Productions.

 

And that FOX is excited to bring Innovation to IndyCar’s, Supercharge its potential, Make its Drivers and IndyCar Household names, along with telling us great stories about the Sport All year round…

 

As some of that’s true. And let’s just same some I’ve Embellished upon…

 

Overall, I’m really not sure what to make about this surprising development that “Dropped” on Thursday, July 31st.

 

funniest bit in the press release is the quote from El Capitano’, nee Roger Penske or simply RP’. About the long-standing trust and shared vision for the future in this partnership with FOX is perplexing to Mwah…

 

Hang on uno momento, how do you have long-standing trust with a company; Err Corporation you haven’t even been working with for one year?

 

But now they’re tied at the Hip and FOX will be helping to guarantee energizing IndyCar’s future, Spew! Can Y’all say Rucky Dawgs’ and Checkers or Wreckers, Yeehaw! Or Playoffs and All Star race?

 

Why not incorporate ‘Ol Uncle Bernaughty’s desire for sprinklers on-track at F1 circuits? Or scheduling races during the afternoon’s Monsoons, eh?

 

As FOX started off this new relationship swimmingly Y’all! As I’d had no clue what the “Programming” Delay was during the Portland IndyCar race, when the start was delayed 15mins.

 

Having subsequently learned via David Land that many Folks in TV Land were rightly peeved with FOX! Having bumped IndyCar over to FS1 as the Live Golf match went long, Four!

 

Along with some local FOX Affiliates dropping the race entirely. Most notably Chicago, where David Malukas and Dale Coyne Racing Hail from. In favour of a Chicago Bears NFL Pre-season game instead! Uhm, let that sink in Y’all, BARF!

 

Along with FOX gaining a multi-year broadcasting rights extension, I doubt the season’s calendar will expand anytime soon, i.e.; begin sooner or end later, since FOX has the Day-Toner’ 500 and Football bookending IndyCar’s take it or leave it schedule…

 

Another entertaining part of this acquisition is how the whole FOX airing the entire season on Network TV was supposed to increase viewership; hopefully to one million viewers average outside the Indy 500 race. Yet FOX is actually averaging less than NBC did.

 

As FOX had its sixth consecutive broadcast of less than 800,000 viewers at Laguna Seca, and I couldn’t see how this trend doesn’t continue for the Portland broadcasts. Which it did, dropping from 734k to 708k viewers, whilst no idea how Milwaukee did?

 

Still not sure how FOX is going to “energize” IndyCar going forwards? Or how their metrics claim a 31% increased growth for year over year broadcasting?

 

On the positive side, selling a third of Penske Entertainment perceivably shores up its weakest link, i.e.; marketing and promotion of the series. But the other strange comment from FOX CEO Eric Shanks, which I heard on David Land’s Youtube Channel. Was about the potential for “Storytelling” of IndyCar year round, Say What?

 

How do you do that when your Hyper-energized racing series is Hibernating for Half the Freakin’ year? Having already begun its long winter’s slumber before Labour Day, Chirp-Chirp, Bueller?

 

What little I’ve read and listened via Podcast on FOX becoming a vested partner in IndyCar, tends to make me believe that Roger will never sell IMS. And wishes to keep in the “Family” for generations to come. And with a 66% controlling interest, that sounds feasible to Mwah for the time being. But who knows, Eh?

 

As I “See” this basically as a way for Roger to insert a “Poison Pill” into others trying to buy Penske Entertainment into the future, along with getting somebody to do the marketing work His team is Failing at currently…

 

Since as Marshall Pruett notes, FOX now has a vested interest financially to make the series grow, in order to please its Shareholders, and their bottom lines.

 

My only question is what happens if FOX decides its not going well and wishes to divest itself from IndyCar in the future? Although I’d guess there would be some sort of buyout clauses in their contract?

 

Now I’ve gotta go find my Coastal.com Tristan Turbo’ Vautier Cheap Sunglasses from Mother speedway, cause’ the Futures so Bright! 

IndyCar, Be Afraid! Its Football time again

“Johnny said you play a pretty good Fiddle, now let me show You How its done!” Hut-Hut, Arkansas!

 

Obviously, this No Fenders rant is pointless! But I felt like uncorking it anyways…

 

As two songs crystalized upon my internal Jukebox after that Oh, so clever title sprang to mind! Since none other than the late Larry McMurtry said He couldn’t write the book until He had a title for it…

 

Thus Wasted Days and Wasted nights first flashed upon my radar. But thinking more about the fearful 869lbs Gorr-rillia’ that IndyCar’s so scared to go up against. Instead Charlie Daniels Devil Went Down to Georgia seemed more Apropos. Since after all, think Georgia’s Football country, Y’all?

 

Having said it before, I’ll stand firm on my conviction that IndyCar sold its Soul to FOX for its latest TV Broadcast deal. For which the crammed down our gullet July portion of the calendar saw FOX only average 734,000 viewers for the Toronto IndyCar race. Last seen on Terrestrial TV Wayback’ in gory 2019, when the NBC Sports Broadcast netted a stark 504,000 viewers. Before NBC showed Oh Canada the love yearly, by making Toronto its only Peacock streaming race of the season.

 

As the hoped for silver bullet of inking FOX as the new television partner, was that the network FOX TV Broadcasts would result in a viewer ratings surge to above the magic One million viewer threshold weekly, Which we know didn’t happen.

 

As Toronto was FOX’s fifth  consecutive race during summer without an audience over 800k. Netting FOX eighth races under 800k, albeit four races above One million viewers.

 

Arse-suming Laguna Seca kept FOX’s streak of under 800,000 viewers going…

 

Average FOX Broadcast equals 829,000+ to date, through 12 races, not including this year’s Indianapolis 500. Compared to NBC’s 38 (2019-2024) non-conflicting races vs. NASCAR, the Indy 500, weather delays, NFL or COVID-19 season averaged 998k plus. Which drops to 935,408 for races going up against opening weeks of NFL. football.

 

While NBC’s six non-conflict telecasts last year averaged 932,833 to FOX’s 829,833 = Over 100k less FOX viewers to date! Which I’d say will not improve with the doldrums, Err Dog Dazes ‘O August fast approaching. Uhm, where’d they go Vern?

 

NBC’s 2024 tally dips to an average of 868k plus when factoring in last year’s Nashville finale vs. Week 2 of NFL Football, Urgh! Which was still approx. 40k higher than FOX’s tally through Toronto…

 

Look, I get it, which doesn’t mean I have to like it! That we’ll never go back to IndyCar’s Heyday’s of CART. Which for example the 1990 CART PPG IndyCar World Series also featured 17 races. Beginning on April 8th at Phoenix International Raceway. And ending on October 21st at Laguna Seca Raceway, with effectively a Double Header. Due to the Marlboro Challenge race running on Saturday.

 

With two new races added that year, both being street races at Denver and Vancouver, with Pocono being dropped due to safety concerns.

 

Although 30 years ago, the IndyCar season began another 17 race calendar on March 5th at Miami’s Bicentennial Park. And concluded the season on September 10th at Laguna Seca. With seven street races, six Ovals and four road course races.

 

Hmm, don’t Y’all just love when history gets in the way of your rant? As perhaps this six months on/off thingy’ Aint’ so new, Eh?

 

Yet IndyCar is never going to improve their ratings until they figure out how to improve the schedule away from its yearly Famine-Feast-Famine routine. As everyone knows All about the ridiculous six month Hibernation. Followed by two or three races with three week gaps between them, Blah-blah-Blah. For which I’d say the 1995 calendar was way more “balanced” and flowing nicely, without any momentum killing gaps upon it.

 

Then slamming half of the season between May to June. A weekend off and then another five races over four July weekends, before limping to the finale on August 31st, Crickets! Is never going to grow your desired audience…

 

And let’s not even get started on one of IndyCar’s worst Buzzwords. Can Y’all say Date Equity? With it being time to play Wackamole again…

 

I also  understand we cannot compare IndyCar to NASCAR or Groan, Formula 1, who’s sweeping the nation with it Real Housewives of F1 reality TV Show. Be still my bleeding Heart. What will they do with the demise of Chris Horner, eh?

 

But its funny how IMSA’s still got a few races left on their calendar, i.e.; Battle on The Bricks (Sept 21st) and Petit Le Mans. (Oct 11^th) While the NHRA’s still racing until November 16th at Pomona, the conclusion of its 20 race season. Even with the litany of Pigskins being tossed round, Illegal Formation – tweet!

 

As believe it or not? Thars’ some of us who only follow Motorsports. Meaning its good to have other racing series to follow in IndyCar’s absence. Especially since IndyCar has gone into its winter’s slumber, and won’t see its shadow for another Freakin’ six months, Sigh!

 

As what’s that ‘Ol saying about Out of sight, Out of mind! Which ironically, Davey Hamilton said the very same thing during the Laguna Seca race, regarding the shortness of the IndyCar season…

 

(TV Ratings Source: Indianapolis Star, Nathan Browne)

Sugarplums, Rainbows and Splenda Sweetness abound at Milwaukee

As where’s Good ‘Ol Homer Simpson to say MMM-MMM, Sprinkles?

 

Whale’ lookie Tahr Folks. My Cable TV Bill just keeps going up and up, Bastardoes! As welcome home Tomaso, we’ve tacked on an additional $7.00 to your overpriced bill, Jackarses!

 

Hmm, what’s my Cable TV provider’s motto? Oh yeah, Spectrum, We Care!

 

So guess it’s a good thingy’ I “watched”, Err listened to over half of Saturday mornings practice session from Milwaukee on FS1 during a leisurely breakfast. But  I just don’t get any “excitement” or Buzz listening to the Booth boyz’, especially Wee Willie Buxom’, aka Will Buxton, or Kevin Lee.

 

Even with FOX owning a third of the series, which I hear they threw IndyCar under the Bus at Portland by moving the race to FS1 since the Live Gold game was going long. As all that IndyCar Radio would say was it was a programming problem when the start was delayed 15mins from 12:22 to 12:37PM Pacific, FOUR!

 

As even Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary ellen asked me why hadn’t they started the race yet? Which I listened to in its entirety via IndyCar Radio on one of the Islands in the Puget sound’s “Archipelago”. Accessible only via Washington State Ferry (WSF) fleet of “Timeless” boat, which even sometimes run on schedule, Toot-tooth!

 

As for Milwaukee, as much as I’d liked for  Palou getting win #9 w’; having boldly told boss Cheep’ He was going to win. Have to say I was Rootin’ for William Steven Power or ScottyMac’ to win instead.

 

As I thought it would be Hilarious for Power to win His second race of the season and really make Penske squirm!

 

Although it was Kyffin Simpson making DJ WillyP’ squirm instead, when giving Him the Kyff-Dog’ Swerve, Youch!

 

While once again I was Rootin’ against my Numero Uno IndyCar Driver Pato Who? During Qualie’, wanting to “See” Davey Malukas “Break His Duck” and claim His first IndyCar pole. Which the Chicago lad came Oh, so tantalizingly close to. Until Alex Palou did what He’s done All season long, claiming His sixth pole of the season, Boo!

 

As this left me begging the question. What would you take? A one year extension at Penske, knowing your toast afterwards. Or a two year deal with Rahal Letterman Lanigan Racing As it sounds like RLLR clearly wants Power; with Sparky’ making way for the Man from Down Under…

 

Whilst it sounds like it’s a foregone conclusion that Penske will take David Malukas next year, even if He claims to be on a two year contract with Foyt. Which would leave Foyt in a Huge Hole for its second car’s budget! Especially since Team Penske is footing the bill for Malukas’s ride.

 

As Marshall Pruett pointed out that Penske hasn’t taken a young driver with zero poles or wins in 40 years! And yes, Scott McLaughlin was a rookie with zero IndyCar poles or wins. But He was a multi-times Supercars champion with some 57 W’s if I remember correctly.

 

With Pruett noting in His August 8th Racer Silly Season update. For which I was still waiting for the website reboot to be upgraded to the Web Content Accessibility Guideline (WCAG) standards “promised” by the time I returned home; Uhm, Oopsadaisy, Butterfingers!

 

Noting how perhaps Jacob Abel could “Backfill” the second Foyt seat? Although perhaps Sparky’, nee Devlin DeFrancesco could take His pocketbook there?

 

For which perhaps, All of this will merely be conjecture by now? Although DJ WillyP’ politely told Ryan Marin on the winners podium at Portland that He wouldn’t know until after Nashville…

 

As Milwaukee turned into a day ‘O firsts Sunday. Beginning with Mexican Salvador de Alba scoring His maiden Indy NXT win, leading wire-to-wire! With Andretti Global claiming a clean sweep of the podium. Including runner-up Dennis Hauger securing the Indy NXT and Rookie Of the Year (ROY) Championships.

 

Then after Alex Palou had led a staggering 195 of 250 laps. A momentary light shower producing sprinkles on-track set the stage for a dramatic end to the Headliner’s event.

 

As Ed Carpenter Racing’s (ECR) Christian Rasmussen, who’d incurred a speeding penalty earlier, along with ECR teammate Alexander Rossi and others, bolted on fresh Firestone rubber.

 

Thus Rasmussen splendidly carved His way thru the field, making mincemeat of the competition. Before brazenly shooting past race leader Palou to lead the final 16 laps enroute to His first career IndyCar win!

 

As the victory was Oh, So Sweet for Rasmussen driving the Splenda car! Giving ECR its first IndyCar win since I believe Rinus VeeKay won on the IMS Road Course Wayback’ in 2021?

 

As Palou said Himself during His podium interview, Rasmussen simply had fresher rubber and Congrats to Him! With Rossi finishing a disappointed fourth. Giving ECR two Top-five finishes on the legendary Milwaukee Mile!

 

As how can you not be Happy seeing another first time winner in victory lane, Eh? As Congrats Christian Rasmussen! 

The Tomaso files: More McMurtry musings

As no more cowboy Jokes here…

 

Yeah, Y’all may be saying why am I scribblin’ about Larry McMurtry on No Fenders, Eh? But He does have a slight connection to automobiles, in the sense He loved road trips for much of His life. Not to mention renting the latest Lincoln or Cadillac for these Coast-to-coast jaunts…

 

As Larry would routinely ask His uncle or somebody where does Highway 271 go to? Apparently the only major road passing His Grandfather’s ranch in Archer City. To which whomever He asked? Would always grunt derisively and say nowhere…

 

Following High School graduation, Larry entered Rice University in Houston, when admission was free to white students. Although Rice had warned Him that His math skills were deficient. And following His first year, He transferred to University of North Texas. Being closer to home, where He also had a High School Buddy attending. Graduating with a BA in 1958, before returning to Rice for His MA in 1960.

 

Larry also was a Wally Stegner Fellow between 1960-61, where His classmates included Ken Kesey, Wendell Berry, Peter S. Beagle and Gurney Norman in Stanford’s Creative Writing Center. Honing His Fiction writing skills, and presumably working upon what would become His first published novel Horseman, pass By, also in 1961.

 

McMurtry notes that Ken Kesey entered the classroom and made a Beeline to the front of the room, letting the rest know He intended to be the class’s Alpha male, albeit Kesey and McMurtry would be friends for many years.

 

Returning to Houston in 1963, taking teaching roles at Texas Christian University (TCU) and Rice. Larry would be visited by Kesey and the Merry Pranksters in Kesey’s psychedelic painted converted school bus enroute to New York city for the 1964 World’s Fair. As this adventure would later be chronicled in Tom Wolfe’s 1968 novel The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test, about the 1960’s Counter Culture revolution.

 

McMurtry called the decade between Terms of Endearment and Lonesome dove His most fallow period of writing, publishing just three novel. Which if I have them correctly? Are Somebody’s Darling, (1978) Cadillac Jack (1982) and The Desert Rose. (1983) With some critics denoting these three books as the Trash Trilogy, Youch!

 

As Larry Himself notes that He started and stopped on the writing of Lonesome dove three times. And at some 900-1,200 pages was taking seriously long to develop, especially since the Cattle drive had another 1,000 miles to go…

 

McMurtry was a raconteur of food and enjoyed going out to dinner for a good meal with beautiful women. As He was good friends with both Cybill Sheppard and Diane Keaton to name just a few.

 

Larry wore large polo shirts to hide his increasing girth and when in Archer City, had a cheeseburger for lunch everyday at the local DQ’. (Dairy Queen)

 

Sometime in Fall of 1991, after a typical day’s activities of writing five to ten pages and moving books from His ranch house to His Archer City bookstore. Larry hit a cow on a gravel road, which He claimed was normal in rural Texas…

 

The next day He stopped at His Internist to get some medicine for a cough that wouldn’t go away, thinking it was from lugging around dusty books. The Doctor said He didn’t look so good and ordered an EKG, before saying OMG, you’re having a heart attack!

 

Yet the room He was in was so small they couldn’t get the stretcher into it, but wouldn’t allow Him to walk out of the room. So the stretcher had to be disassembled, before the starstruck ambulance driver drove off a high curb after learning it was the author of Lonesome dove He was transporting! Causing the IV bags to jostle and the needles pull upon Larry strapped on a gurney…

 

Next, an Angiogram was performed, with Larry watching on a four inch screen the insides of His heart, learning He had at least three major arteries blocked and needed immediate bypass surgery! But McMurtry needed to finish the book He was writing first, The Evening Star an immediate sounded like six months to Him. Which sounds like a typical writer to Mwah…

 

On December 2, 1991 after much convincing by His Doctors, telling Larry He’d feel fine right up until the day He keeled over! McMurtry underwent quadruple heart bypass surgery, where He was put on a heart lung machine; to continue blood and oxygen while the heart is stopped. And then His heart was removed from His chest cavity and put into a cooler at 28 degrees Celsius while doctors rerouted His veins past the major blockages, grafting veins from His feet or legs.

 

four hours later, they simply reinstalled His heart and with everything re-attached, shocked His heart back into beating and “buttoned” Him up!

 

As I must say that this analogy comes from watching myriads of TV car builder shows made me instantly think of when they go to fire the new engine for the first time. And that I had to re-read this section a second time for clarity…

 

Since the first time I heard the part about removing His heart when listening to the book in the evening, I kind of got the creeps wondering to myself is this how they performed my open heart surgery? Although I’m 98% certain that my heart wasn’t removed from my body, but it’s a very chilling thought afterwards…

 

 Even stranger yet is how McMurtry simply rested for ten days at His Georgetown dwelling before resuming life as normal, i.e.; driving to Texas for Christmas, albeit avoiding His mother as much as possible! And then just going back to His normal working life of running a rare book store, writing, etc. As this seems very odd to me, especially since I couldn’t do anything initially, besides sleep! Along with zero strenuous activity for the first eight weeks…

 

Thus, He lived nearly another thirty years after having quadruple heart bypass surgery at the end of 1991. And suffered from great depression following His surgery before writing Streets of Laredo with writing partner Diana Ossana.

 

As Diana was instrumental in bringing Him out of His “funk”, with McMurtry recovering at Her house in Tucson. And would transcribe Larry’s written draft written in Her kitchen onto the computer.

 

As Larry initially would write five pages a day on an old typewriter, and during His initial recovery period would write 90mins each morning.

 

Interestingly, Larry McMurtry married Norma Fay Kesey, the widow of Ken Kesey in 2011, in His hometown of Archer City. Larry was 74 and Faye was 76.

 

Ken Kesey was the author of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, which ironically just celebrated the movie’s 50th anniversary on July 13th &16th. When the re-released movie was shown on limited theatres in Washington and Oregon. Although supposedly this was occurring nationwide.

 

Wasn’t aware that Michael Douglass was the producer of the film, which stars Jack Nicholson and Danny DeVito.

 

As the movie was nominated for nine Oscar awards, although Douglass said He had to work very hard to get Nicholson to attend the awards ceremony. As Nicholson had been nominated five times and failed to win five times previously.

 

Striking out on the first four nominations, Nicholson began lambasting Douglass, who said Hang in there Jack. Before the movie swept the five “biggies”, i.e.; Best Picture, Director, Actor,, Actress and Screenplay.

 

Which had only occurred once before in 1934 for It Happened One Night. And only once since for Silence of the Lambs. (1991)

 

Kesey grew up in Springfield, Oregon and graduated from the University of Oregon, and was a longtime resident of Eugene. Before dying at age 66 in November, 2001.

 

While McMurtry was a prolific writer, with some 40 novels alone written. Not to mention His massive screenplay writing career for both film and television.

 

As McMurtry’s novels adapted for film garnered 34 Oscar nominations, and won 13. Including McMurtry and Diana Ossana co-winning for Best Adaptive Screenplay for Brokeback Mountain in 2005.

 

As Larry made His portion of His acceptance speech wearing jeans and cowboy boots underneath His tuxedo jacket. Thanking His typewriter and urging everyone to support books, for which without, there would be no stories.

 

And this doesn’t even include all of the Emmy nominations and awards His Lonesome Dove mini-series and television work received… 

Cornholed, Again!

And He misses the Pile…

 

Yeah, know Y’all are saying where’s my riveting Canadian GP or Gateway IndyCar race reports eh? But Yuhs know how I roll here in Nofendersville…

 

Once again, I got Cornholed! Just over a fortnight ago, (Sunday, June 1st) when chaos was breaking out in Barcelona, ci!

 

Supposedly ESPNews was replaying the Spanish GP at 2:30PM. (Pacific) As I long ago stopped getting up at Oh Dark 30 for Formula 1, Ole!

 

I turned Thy Telie’ on early, since I often aim the remote the wrong way and have to play the turn the cable box on game, being Blind Y’all…

 

Yep, Thar was some riveting Cornhole game being played, which I must say is like my trying to watch a Darts match, with the bean bags going womp-womp-womp! Followed by what sounded like somebody calling a High School tennis game TV announcers noise.

 

Without knowing the time, 2:30PM came ‘n went, and when I finally checked the time since this riveting Cornhole match was now onto another game, it was 2:43PM. And in the words of George Crybaby’ Russell, What The Flock? Language George, the FIA doesn’t like cuss words, Tsk-Tsk!

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2021/04/welcome-to-formula-ones-pariah-club.html

 

Hmm, may be the F1 replay won’t start until 3:00PM? Since the Emilia Romagna rebroadcast had a similar problema, with some college sports program running 20mins extra before somebody apparently woke up and began the F1 replay. Which I “watched” an hour of the Max parade before going to bed…

 

Checking my Zap-2-It TV guide again for the umpteenth time. Since it was past 3PM and Cornhole was still going strong, with the scintillating score being 8-6, Urgh! It said that ESPNews was also replaying the Spanish GP at 7PM. And even though I’d accidently heard who the winner was, Sigh! I thought I’d watch it anyways, since this is the only reason I keep my outlandishly overpriced Spectrum Cable TV service. Now that Fox Sports has taken over MotoGP and doesn’t replay it until the middle of the night, but I digress…

 

Nope, Stee-rike Two! As there was some riveting womens college baseball game going on, in the middle of the fifth inning involving Arkansas I believe, Swell! So I just went and “watched” Err listened to the Youtube Highlights “package” instead. Since I’d waisted far too mucho time trying to catch the Gory F1 replay!

 

Guessing y’all know what happened in the closing stages of the Spanish GP race highlights, ci?

 

But once again, I missed All of the Fireworks surrounding who I’m now calling Max Blunderhead! Being just one more blatant example of why I don’t like Maximus Hothead! And I totally agree with 2016 F1 World Champion Nico Rosberg’s assessment that Verstappen should have been given a black flag for purposely ramming Russell! As a ten second time penalty doesn’t send a severe enough message to a driver well known for His outrageous, and dangerous driving antics…

 

Have scribbled previously that I’ve never disputed Verstappen’s driving talent. It’s just His unrealistic behaviour of a toddler throwing His bottle out of the pram whenever He doesn’t get His way on-track that rankles me!

 

As His petulant spearing of Russell after having been told by His race engineer to give George the place back seems reminiscent of Senna deliberately crashing Prost at Suzuka! Or Michael Schumacher squeezing Rubino’, nee Rubens Barrichello into the wall at some 180mph at the Hungaroring in 2010! Where the German received a ten place grid penalty for the next race at thee Mighty Spa’; Spa-Francorchamps for His reckless, Err Ruthless driving behaviour.

 

Which like I’ve said before, Senna and Schumacher are the two closest drivers Max Blunderhead seems to emulate on-track, meaning I should be a fan of His…

 

And how can you not enjoy Max’s off track candidness? Saying that Red Bull teammate Yuki Tsunoda is not a pancake! In regards to the Japanese driver completely struggling with the diabolical RB21 chassis, for which Liam Lawson was demoted from, and arguably should have never been so hastily promoted to the Big Bullx’ outfit after only eleven Grands Prix experience…

 

Or Max saying He’ll bring some tissues next time after Russell’s remarks regarding His driving antics.

 

Yet Maximus Hothead’s temper tantrum is inexcusable, and once again Red Bull is doing nothing about it! Since what would be the draconian punishment to Tsunoda, Lawson or the other ‘lil Bullz’ (Racing Bulls) rookie driver Isack Hadjar for disobeying a direct order from the race team?

 

Max needs to be sat down for one Grand Prix if the sport really wishes to set the proper example for not tolerating such egregious driving behaviour! Where the Austrian Grand Prix minus Verstappen would definitely send a message! Or at the very least, a ten grid place penalty at Montreal.

 

Thus, I found Thyself hoping Maxwell silver Hammer would pick up one more needed penalty point at Circuit Gilles Villeneuve to enforce a one race ban at Spielberg. Although knowing Maxwell Silver Hammer’s to shrewd for that…

 

Yet it serves Max right that He won’t secure a fifth consecutive F1 world championship this year, since He doesn’t deserve it!

 

Meanwhile, thanks to F1 being on the eastern seaboard, and Indy being a night race. I actually got to “watch”, Err listen to most of the Canadian Grand Prix live on Thy Telie’, i.e.; both Friday practice sessions, Qualie and the race.

Apparently the word Lando Norris was using over the weekend on Il Notre Dam was inevitable. Which surely, I should have expected it would be inevitable for Max Blunderhead and George F-bombs R Us Russell to be on the front row together again for Sunday’s race.

 

Max was very “Cool” in the post qualifying interview with Jack Vanilla, aka Jacques Villeneuve. Replying He always wants to be on pole…

 

Then Russell was a Cheeky Bugger! And  I’m 86% certain the crowd Booed Him when He said He’s got a few more points on His license to play with. For which all I could say was Youch!

 

Or as ‘lil Davey Malukas used to say during the Team Penske Bus Bros dazes’, shots fired!

 

And then during Martin BillyBob’ Brundle’s legendous’ Grid Walk, Brundle cheekily told Carlos Sainz Jr. I promise you Carlos, your not late as He went scurrying by, Youza, good one Martin!

 

Yet the race was anti-climatic at the front with Russell leading wire-to-wire from pole, with Max second and Kimi Antonelli scoring His maiden podium.

 

While all of the fireworks occurred on lap 67 of 70 when Norris made an ill-advised overtaking attempt upon McLaren teammate, and F1 championship points leader Oscar Piastri. With Norris shunting and Piastri finishing fourth after a cautionary pitstop to change tyres, at least that’s what I thought I heard the Sky sports Pundits say? With the race finishing under caution… 

Traipsing thru the Penske Racing Museum, Again

Scott McLaughlin’s 2018 Supercars Championship winning Ford Falcon on display in Scottsdale. (The Tomaso Collection)

 

As no jokes about ScottyMac’ needing His Ford Falcon to bounce off the walls at Mother Speedway. Or Team Penske’s travails during Ye Month ‘O May…

 

In what’s become a cherished tradition during every visit to The Valley of The Sun, once again your Humble No Fenders Scribe Tomaso was blissfully ensconced in the Penske Racing Museum this past March.

 

Some three weeks plus after my latest visit, I suddenly found myself wondering if my recollection of my inaugural visit was correct? To which I’m happy to say it was fairly spot-on nearly twenty years later. Albeit it was actually November 30, 2005 when I first set foot inside the Penske Racing Museum thanks solely to Blogmeister Miguel taking me there. Having seen El Capitano talking to Ye ‘Ol Windbag Dave Despain on Wind Tunnel the same year from the museum…

 

Although it slays me now, I guess I really shouldn’t be surprised that I launched a nine page story on my first visit to la Museo some 13yrs ago. For which if you’re inclined. Whale’ Yuhs better be Damn well inclined or comfy if you’re gonna read All Gory 4,253 words written in Thy No Fenders Post, Aye Karumba!

 

http://www.nofenders.net/2012/04/penske-racing-museum-inaugural-visit.html

 

Arriving at 1PM, Blogmeister Miguel and I accidently walked into the adjoining Aston Martin dealership, where we were immediately met by a friendly Salesman curtly asking if He could help us? To which Miguel seeing the rest of our party waving at us thru the glass walls, said I guess the museum is next door…

 

The first IndyCar chassis encountered was Josef Schlick’ Newgarden’s 2023 Indianapolis 500 winner. Followed by His 2017 Championship winning mount. Other various IndyCars sat on display, including two Norton Gould Rick Mears cars. Mears 1984 No. 6 “Yellow Submarine” Indy 500 winner. Whilst Snowbyrd MJ’ read to me the information plaque upon Tom sneva’s racecar that He set the first official 200mph lap at the Brickyard in.

 

Gil de Feran’s 100th race winning Reynard/Honda resplendent in Team Penske’s long standing Marlboro white with Dayglo red also graced the museum’s main floor. Being the car that won El Capitano His “Ton” of IndyCar victories, becoming the first ever IndyCar team to do so.

 

Along with Newgarden’s 2023 Indianapolis 500 winner, there were a further three chassis I’d never “seen” before. One being the red No. 12 Verizon of Will Power, the Aussie’s 2022 mount that He won the final Detroit Grand Prix on Belle Isle, along with that year’s Astor Challenge Cup aboard. Nee 2022 IndyCar Series title.

 

Both Blogmeister Miguel and Artiste Dave were “wowed” by and audaciously bright neon lime green IndyCar bellowing to Symone’, nee Pageantry’, aka Simon Pagenaud. Being Simon’s 2019 Menard Indianapolis 500 winner.

 

The fourth and final “New” car that initially stumped me as Snowbyrd MJ’ said it was the #17 of ScottyMac’s, Huh? Turned out to be Scott McLaughlin’s No. 17 Ford Falcon FG X racecar that He campaigned for FordDJR Team Penske between 2017-18. The last Falcon model raced Down Under in V-8 Supercars.

 

As it makes sense that the car that Mclaughlin first came tantalizingly close to winning the 2017 Supercars Championship with, and then securing the first of His three consecutive Supercars titles in 2018 with, is now proudly on display in Scottsdale.

 

https://www.v8sleuth.com.au/mclaughlin-reunites-with-first-supercars-title-winner/

 

Also, initially I was Cornfuzed’ over why Newgarden’s 2023 Indy 500 winner wasn’t the same chassis that He used to repeat winning in 2024? And I still hadn’t figured it out some three weeks later, until No Fenders Offical’ Photographer Carpets came up with a close answer. Whale’, at least He pointed Mwah in the right direction…

 

Having “read”, err listened to the IndyStar’s article on the gala reopening of the IMS Museum, which includes the Penske Gallery. Replete with the 1988, 1994, 2009 and 2024 Indianapolis 500 winning chassis on loan. Along with Penske Racing’s first Indianapolis 500 entry, Mark Donohue’s 1969 Lola T152. And the winner from El Capitano’, aka roger Penske’s very first trip to Mother speedway in 1951.

 

Do Y’all know the answer to this riveting trivia question? Time’s up, put them pencils down…

 

Yep, that’s right, the 2024 Dallara DW12 chassis featured the new for that season’s Hybrid Energy Recovery System, (ERS) adding some 100lbs to the ageless DW12 racecar. Having made it’s 200th start at St Pete one year ago!

 

Although IndyCar didn’t introduce the Hybrid ERS system until Mid-Ohio in July, 2024. I’m 86% certain that the 2024 Dallara DW12 was decked out with the new magnesium bell housing/transmission casing and other ERS ancillaries, minus the ERS unit…

 

Hence, Arse-suming this Dallara DW12 also included the auxiliary “plumbing” systems. Most notably the right hand side ERS cooling radiator, that Chevrolet teams used the “blocker” plate , louver or whatever they’re called at the Thermal Club this year to negative effect. When the increased temperature sent the ERS into “limp” mode to preserve itself from overheating!

 

Or was it simply the fact that I heard sometime this May that Penske simply pulls every Indianapolis 500 winner out of service for posterity’s sake to be displayed in perpetuity?

 

Naturally, as time marches on, and we’ve just wrapped up another vaunted “Month of May”. Especially with how crazy this year’s race was! I’m beginning to forget what else was on hand? Although I know Mark Donohue’s 1973 IROC Porsche 911 Carrera RSR was there. Along with El Capitano’s 1963 Catalina NASCAR Tintop’.

 

Whilst Snowbyrd MJ’ told me that the 1972 Hurst Oldsmobile Pace Car was on display. Although I don’t remember if Donohue’s 1972 McLaren M16 Sunoco Indy 500 winner was on display?

 

And although I knew it wouldn’t be there, I was still disappointed that one of the Porsche Penske Motorsports Porsch 963’s weren’t present. Then again, Id Arse-sume that the All conquering No. 7 will once day in the future grace the Penske Racing Museum.

 

And that’s just a slice of what was Thar’, since I didn’t even mention Joey “Sliced bread” Logano’s 2015 Daytona 500 winning Pennzoil Ford fusion, or All of the “Eye Candy” outside the museum… 

Domination, Indeed!

Although that’s not the word that came to mind…

 

What can I say about the utter domination of two drivers this past weekend, Eh?

 

As IndyCar Radio’s Mike Gravelly’ James kept saying the word domination when describing Alex Palou’s performance at thee Barbers’. As I’d say that Palou took the Barber shears to His competition! Leading a Mega’ 81 of 90 laps at Barber Motorsports Park in Leeds, Alabama Sunday.

 

As I simply marveled over Palou’s domination, cruising home to a 16-plus seconds lead, for which all I could say was the word Annihilation!

 

And if you thought the IndyCar race was boring, well, I fell asleep just past the halfway point of the Miami Grand Prix! Although the first 13 laps were certainly exciting! And how can you not appreciate Verstappen’s tenacity, Eh!

 

But as Sky Sports F1 lead pundit Kroftie’, aka David Kroft said later on. The two McLarens were in another Post code Sunday at the Hard Rock Stadium! And Oscar Piastri’s winning by 36+ seconds over Mercedes third place George Russell was total Annihilation!

 

As I’d thought that Palou had put a Beatdown on the IndyCar field, which He did! Now leading the championship by 60 points over unlikely second place Christian Lundgaard. But what does Piastri’s tour de force say about Formula 1? Claiming McLaren’s first three-peat by a driver since Mika Hakkinen during 1997-98, Crikeys!

 

Ironically, I heard ScottyMac’, aka Scott McLaughlin musing sometime over the weekend about Clean Air, as there’s those words again…

 

While you’d have to give Lewis Hamilton an A+ for sarcasm during the Miami Grand Prix. First telling His Ferrari team to have a Tea break while they’re at it! Regarding swapping positions with teammate Charles Leclerc.

 

And then when told to let Leclerc back by and having to wait for Him to overtake. When Lewis’s race engineer told Him that Williams Carlos Sainz was 1.4 seconds behind. Hamilton quipped do you want me to let Him by too? 

Another lost weekend of Shouting

As Are, You, Excited Now? Speak up you frothing Announcers…

 

Hmm, why did that title make me immediately think of an ‘Ol Rush song titled Between the Wheels, and the words Another Wasteland, Eh? Although it’s actually “another War, Another Wasteland and Another Lost Generation”, Righto Geddy…

 

“To live between the Wars in our time

Living in real time

Living in Good times

Holding on to Yesterdays,

 

You know how that Rabbit feels

Going under your speeding wheels

Wheels can cut you down

But the Wheels of time

Just pass you by”

 

 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cj1eUnNOvpY

 

Spent the entire weekend of April 11-13 consuming four separate motor racing series, i.e.; IndyCar, IMSA, formula 1 and MotoGP, Gulp! With my primary focus upon Indy Cars at The Beach’, ergo Long Beach. Along with the IMSA Sprint race which featured the return of Robert Wickens; beginning with Friday’s first IndyCar practice session.

 

Catching half of Saturday morning’s second IndyCar practice on (Fox Sports) FS1, as FS2 pulled Ye ‘Ol Switcheroo. Bumping the MotoGP Sprint race to that afternoon in favour of showing us more Bassmasters, Fish On!

 

Then IndyCar’s Qualie’ session capped off by the 140mins IMSA Sports Car “Sprint” race.

 

Next I “watched”, Err listened to the Bahrain Grand Prix Sunday morning, followed by the Long Beach Grand Prix and the nightcap being MotoGP’s delayed airing of the Qatar Grand Prix.

 

Now perhaps it’s just Mwah, but All of these races seemingly blurred into one long set of Boring motor races! Especially both F1 and MotoGP, the latter definitely not worth waiting until 9PM Pacific to watch, Urgh! As what did Raymond Hando say about late race start times ruining your day?

 

So, I didn’t catch the Australian Grand Prix, other than listening to the Highlights package. Being the most exciting of the season’s first four races, largely due to inclement weather, i.e.; passing rain shower…

 

Yet Formula 1 has largely been processional, even though I’m happy that Oscar Piastri has won twice from pole. Other than I hope He won’t get too swell-headed over thinking He can win the championship. As He’d be smart to ask His manager Mark Handlebarz’ Webber how that worked out Yas Isle 15 years ago!

 

Cannot say that IndyCar has been Uber exciting either, albeit at least there’s been passes for the win, even if Alex Palou won the first two races, followed by second place at Long Beach, where effectively Kyle Kirkwood led wire-to-wire from pole.

 

As it’s funny how at least the DW12 seems more capable of following other racecars and allowing for passing, but is this a biproduct of Firestone’s different rubber coumpounds?

 

Whilst Pirelli makes a range of different compound tyres for Formula 1, the choice of five various compounds in this range seems to be too small for meaningful tyre performance drop-off. As just consider how many drivers ran a one stop race at Shanghai…

 

As it’s even more funny how the current F1 chassis regulations introduced in 2022 were specifically designed to allow for the trailing car to run closer behind and encourage passing! Yet the ten F1 Constructors designs has seemingly converged to the point that this is no longer applicable.

 

Making a Farce of Formula 1 further, is the FIA instituting a mandatory second tyre stop at Monaco this year, to artificially induce some passing upon the narrow streets of Ye Principality, where overtaking is nye impossible…

 

Meanwhile, Team Penske and it’s factory Porsche 963’s have been untouchable. With the team’s No. 7 entry having won the first three races, Yawn! As don’t know if Long Beach was their second 1-2 finish?

 

Whilst Ye Pinball Wizard’, aka Marc Marquez returned to His domineering, winning ways in Qatar. Claiming His fourth, consecutive pole, along with four consecutive Sprint races on the trot. Plus His third Grand Prix win in Doha, Yawn!

 

Oops, what about the Shouting you might be saying? As I just don’t understand why the various TV Announcers think they need to Shout at us to get excited?

 

Although I did tune-in to my very first dosage of the new FOX TV announce lineup. For which I must say, Will Buxton seemed completely, totally out of place!

 

While Jack Harvey didn’t seem “Stiff” to Mwah, just think it’s His dry, British accent coming across…

 

As my favourite Announce Duo of the weekend was IMSA Radio’s John Heindhaugh and Ryan Marin during the Long Beach Sprint race. As Marin manages to interject enthusiasm without shouting or screaming. And Heindhaugh’s always entertaining.

 

Whilst the King of Screamers Kroftie’, aka Sky sports f1 lead Pundit David Kroft was doing His usual bit to keep me awake thru another boring F1 race!

 

And I don’t wanna say that the Long Beach IndyCar race was boring, But! Even Mark Gravelly’ James didn’t bother shouting euphorically over Kirk Kirwood winning, which speaks volumes to Mwah.

 

Yeah, it’s gonna be a Gory long, Hard season of motor racing, if this it what will typically transpire the rest of the year, outside that ‘lil ‘Ol Oval track at 16th and Georgetown. Provided we Don’t have more multiple faux Red Flag stoppages, or some Golf game on Thy Telie!

 

Then again, I suppose a boring race weekend is better than NO racing at all, Eh?

 

Partial song lyrics from: Between the Wheels by Rush. From their 1984 Album Grace Under Pressure.