Domination, Indeed!

Although that’s not the word that came to mind…

 

What can I say about the utter domination of two drivers this past weekend, Eh?

 

As IndyCar Radio’s Mike Gravelly’ James kept saying the word domination when describing Alex Palou’s performance at thee Barbers’. As I’d say that Palou took the Barber shears to His competition! Leading a Mega’ 81 of 90 laps at Barber Motorsports Park in Leeds, Alabama Sunday.

 

As I simply marveled over Palou’s domination, cruising home to a 16-plus seconds lead, for which all I could say was the word Annihilation!

 

And if you thought the IndyCar race was boring, well, I fell asleep just past the halfway point of the Miami Grand Prix! Although the first 13 laps were certainly exciting! And how can you not appreciate Verstappen’s tenacity, Eh!

 

But as Sky Sports F1 lead pundit Kroftie’, aka David Kroft said later on. The two McLarens were in another Post code Sunday at the Hard Rock Stadium! And Oscar Piastri’s winning by 36+ seconds over Mercedes third place George Russell was total Annihilation!

 

As I’d thought that Palou had put a Beatdown on the IndyCar field, which He did! Now leading the championship by 60 points over unlikely second place Christian Lundgaard. But what does Piastri’s tour de force say about Formula 1? Claiming McLaren’s first three-peat by a driver since Mika Hakkinen during 1997-98, Crikeys!

 

Ironically, I heard ScottyMac’, aka Scott McLaughlin musing sometime over the weekend about Clean Air, as there’s those words again…

 

While you’d have to give Lewis Hamilton an A+ for sarcasm during the Miami Grand Prix. First telling His Ferrari team to have a Tea break while they’re at it! Regarding swapping positions with teammate Charles Leclerc.

 

And then when told to let Leclerc back by and having to wait for Him to overtake. When Lewis’s race engineer told Him that Williams Carlos Sainz was 1.4 seconds behind. Hamilton quipped do you want me to let Him by too? 

F1: Yumps' abound at COTA!

As what's that song 'bout Watch Out for those Trees?

Ah, thou life 'O luxury of being Ye Basement Dwelling Blogger! Hey! Turn the Gory lights back On; Hya! Which is why I'm just posting this now...

As I spent Friday loungin' about 'N watching; Err listening to both of Friday's Free Practice sessions from the Circuit Of The Americas, nee COTA.

Where not only was it unseasonably cool, with the day's first practice starting with a temperature of 48deg-f before warming up during FP2.

Whilst the topic of the day was the track's ultra bumpiness, for which per Tipicali, Golden Child, nee Lewis Hamilton was heard via his In-car radio proclaiming This is the Bumpiest Track in the World! To which Sky Sports Pundit ANT', nee Anthony Davidson Quipped back before Hamilton's comment ended, No it's Not, Sebring is!

Some Formula 1 Drivers Don't like COTA's Bumps, others think Pretty Cool

Hmm? CoInky-dense' that one of the track's loudest critics over the Bumps being Unacceptable is starting from Pitlane after being penalized for missing the Weigh-bridge.

Since Don't recall 'lil Syd Viddle being as Harshly Penalized when he tore-up the Weigh-bridge's scales when he was having another Hissy Fit in Brazil last year

Next, I thought the 10:55AM Pacific F1 Programme listed on ESPNews was going to be Qualie', but instead I enjoyed the rare treat of watching Formula One's FP3 Saturday Third Practice session instead.

As the three Announcers; Err Sky Sports F1 Presenters 'N Pundits spent several minutes covering Sergio Perez's severe punishment. Noting that not only had the Mexican Driver Not stopped at the Weigh-bridge, apparently missing the lights, and continued to his Pit Stall. But then the Racing Point mechanics fitted some, but not All four Pirelli "P-Zero" tyres to Sergio's racecar, which is a definite No-No!

Therefore for these various rules infringements, the Race Stewards were Forced to impose the Harshest Penalty available per the FIA Rulebook, which both former Formula 1 Drivers ANT' and Paul di Resta dually noted were Overly Harsh. Along with David Kroft concurring, and All three suggesting the rules needed to be tweaked.

As apparently, although Vettel's temper-tantrum Antics seem far more Egregious! Once again getting Off with a simple Slap upon his wrist, Uhm, being Fined. The Application of the Rules seems to continue being very inconsistent...

Oops! Sebastian Vettel Threatens to Run Over Steward, is Fined for Breaking Scales

Meanwhile, back to Friday's TV coverage, where Pitlane Reporter and Funnyman Ted Kravitz opened his monologue 'bout it perhaps being (Max) Verstappen's Redemption, saying was it Idaho, Ohio? Where Shaw shank Redemption was? Which led into Kroftie', nee David Kroft saying it's in Maine, it's a Steven King Horror thing. To which ANT' chortled back it's scary enough being with Kroftie'; Botta-Boom!

Yet the Horror Show has to be the track's Nasty Bumps, as the tarmac's steadily gotten worse each year, and the F1 Drivers all noted it had gotten way worse from just one year ago, with the worst spots being Turns 9, 12 and 19, along with a nasty bump exiting Pitlane! While Turn 5 was also causing Headaches for the F1 Drivers.

And I say Yumps 'cause David Kroft kept mumbling on 'bout the correct pronunciation for Houston, which immediately reminded Mwah of my past IndyCar Villain Hulio's losing a Series title when crashing hard over a Bump in the Houston Reliant Park's Stadium parking lot.

Otay, think may be Castroneves just toasted his transmission; Err Gearbox as can't really remember, other than Scott Dixon went on to capture his then second IndyCar Series Championship in 2013 thanks to HULIO's Houston retirement.

Not to mention that I believe that's the Germanic vernacular for what it's fame Nordschliefe, nee Nurburgring's full of over its 175+ corners, Ja Volt!

And the frivolity continued with Kravitz doing an in-depth bit upon DannyRic's "One Off" Helmet livery honouring the Aggies', with a nicely done Texas Longhorns themed Helmet.

To which at least Kravitz didn't try pretending to know what the Number 12 on the motif represented. Saying may be it's for Texas being the 12th State? Or 12th Legislative District? As I groaned NO!

Since I find it Funny I know the answer, since I Ain't a Stick 'n Ball Fan, but have lived in the Land of Thee 12s' forever!

So Wrongo David Kroft! It Ain't for the number of College Conference Teams, but as the Seattle Seahawks know. Since pretty sure they had to pay Texas for the rights to continue using the No. 12, which is synonymous with the 12th Man being The Fans! As our Americre' Football has 11 players on the Gridiron...

And speakin' of Americre', our Formula 1 Team Haas certainly didn't have a great day. As once again it was Romain Grosjean into the Barriers Friday! ruining his new Front wing which Sky Sports Pundit Karun Cowboy' Chandhok noted looks eerily similar to Scuderia Ferrari's Front wing from the beginning of the season.

As I totally Fail to understand why the Haas F1 Team chose to keep Romain another year instead of signing Nico Hulkenberg? As what type 'O Kryptonite for Herr Goonter' does the Frenchman keep in his firesuit's pockets? Since Grosjean just seems to have Peaked a longtime ago now, and I just Don't buy this continuity Babble...

Grosjean refuses to Blame Cool COTA Bumps for Crash

And then the wheels started falling off la Scuderia's wagon, becoming worse 'N worse as the weekend wore on. Since first on Friday, a throttle sensor apparently Done Packed Up! On Chuck LuhCluck's (Charles Leclerc) Ferrari due to those Nasty Yumps!

Which apparently wasn't the only issue Ferrari was surrounded by, since Arch Nemesis Red bull sought a technical clarification upon what it felt was a Rules loophole that la Scuderia was exploiting?

A lot of Noise

Then during Saturday's final practice session, Leclerc immediately stopped his chariot after reporting something's wrong with the engine! Forcing the team to scramble to install a new PU, nee Power Unit prior to Qualifying.

But at least the Monegasque didn't have to take a 10-place Grid Penalty, since Ferrari was able to install an Older Spec PU, which afterwards, the Team would claim was the reason for Leclerc's lack of optimum Horsepower during the race.

Since Team Principal Mattia Binotto and Leclerc both took exception to Max Verstappen's public comments 'bout Cheating...

Ferrari rejects Allegations, Charles Leclerc Hits Out at Max Verstappen

Oh Yeah, almost forgot. I spent the majority of the race Yelling at the Telescreen for Valtteri Bottas to Not let his most esteemed team-mate Golden Child win the Bloody race!

For which although the Finn did, nobody will remember this since Lewis Hamilton claimed his sixth F1 Driver World Championship by finishing runner-up, with Red Bull Bad Boy Verstappen rounding out the Austin F1 Podium.

Leclerc trundled home P4, behind his Bosom buddy Max, with the Dutch Lightning Rod's team-mate Alexander Albon rounding out the Top-5 finishers, whilst Vettel retired with a broken rear suspension. Which apparently Ain't Nothin' compared to his contrataumpts at Sao Paolo...

F1: Talking Cats, Tyre Compounds and Formula Fords

Along with All of the other typically Free Flowing Tidbits Tossed Out over the somewhat Casual, laid-back Friday's Free Practice sessions...

Although this year's Mexican Grand Prix second Free Practice (FP2) session was anything but laid back for Alexander Albon, who had a mighty Shunt, at what 'Ol Kroftie', nee David Kroft somewhat interjected was at a "Pedestrian" 65mph; WHUMP!

Although to be Fair to Messer Albon, who's Hands Down, my Favourite F1 Rookie this year. Lance Stroll also crashed his Racing Point F1 car, causing the first Red Flag period of the Day.

And due to Mexico City's extreme Altitude, with the figure of 2,240 Meters - which I can still hear 'Ol Professor (Steve) Matchett saying is "New Money." And in "Old Money" is 7,350 Feet.

Thus, the Thin Air coupled with the mornings FP1 Session being relatively cool, along with a "Green Track," having rained the night before caused major consternation for all of the runners trying to see how the various Tyre Compounds, i.e.; Soft-Medium-Hard worked out?

As Kroftie' noted how he just didn't think the Soft rubber would last for a One Stop race, and was hoping for a Two-stopper instead. While Theodore, Not Lenny! Kravitz; Hya! Sky Sports Jovial F1 Pitlane Reporter tried tying the extra stop theory to also helping cool the Brakes...

To which Kroft Dryly noted that the Brakes reach a maximum of 1200C' as in Centigrade temperature, which he said was the same for molten Lava!

Yet, suppose somewhat since I cannot See the Formula 1 Cars Onscreen... I enjoyed the Bits 'O Humour Thrown into the Broadcast's veritable Spin Cycle.

As Johnny Herbert was Brilliantly Cheeky' over his pouring Salt in 'Ol ANT's, nee Anthony Davidson's wounds! As Herbert laid it on overly Thick, with a wide Paint-brush; Err roller! Proclaiming he was the Best Driver Ever to Win in Formula Ford's! Regarding a viewer's Tweet asking if Thar were any F1 Drivers today who cut their teeth in the Feeder Series?

As Johnny cheerfully said, sorry but the Best Ain't Anthony Davison; Hya! As Kroftie' jokingly said too bad we can't read Ant's reply!

And it's really hard finding any definitive information upon Ye Intrawoods', other than Herbert won the 1985 British Formula Ford Festival, ahead of 100 Competitors!

Johnny Herbert: Worst Car I ever Drove - Formula flawed

As Kudos to Johnny for ultimately making it to Formula 1, even if his true potential was never realized - due to his massive racing accident at Brands Hatch, which massively damaged his legs & feet!

Since I still recall reading somewhere a million years ago how even after Johnny returned to racing, bits 'O rubber 'N Ash-fault were still seeping out of his feet a year later when being a Formula 1 Rookie for Benetton. And perhaps even years afterwards?

Johnny Herbert's Career

But the Funniest Quip of the Day's two TV Broadcasts was when Messer Kroft read another viewers Tweet 'bout the practice being so Boring it put his Cat to Sleep!

To which it was not only Brilliant that Kroftie' read this out loud, but his answer was priceless. Dryly inquiring What do you Talk to Cats about?

Although perhaps Thars Somme-thun' to this Sleepy Felines thingy' after all? Since after Maximus Hothead went Max Agro', first playing Bumper Cars with Golden Child; Whahhhh! Max raced me Hard...

Abrasive Max Verstappen is one of F1's Biggest Assets, but Mexican Grand Prix Shows both his Best and Worst Sides

And then Slicing his tyre against Valtteri Bottas Front Wing Endplate; Ro-Ro! Along with la Scuderia toasting Charles Leclerc's race strategy once again; SHEISA!

Hmm, Seriously? Did I really read that Ferrari was covering Red Bull Racing's No. 2 Alexander Albon's Pit-stop? And were truly worried 'bout Albon unexpectedly winning?

Nope, as the race once again settled into another procession. As Claudio' later inquired how I'd enjoyed the F1 Parade? I replied that I'd fallen asleep somewheres shortly after Golden Child Whinnied 'bout were Mercedes sure they'd put him on the right tyre strategy?

And continued inspecting thou insides of my Eyelids until that riveting Top-3 Drivers interview by Bloody Jense', as Seb', you must be Disappointed not to be able to be on the Top Step of the Podium today...

F1: Ferrari Horses round Under Singapore lights

As what's that 'Ol Sayin' my late Awntie Harriet would Say? Oh Yeah Somme-thun' about The east end of A Horse going West!

Ah, where to begin Kiddoes? As I could mention the sheer insanity of being Blind 'N Sitting in the Dark for the evening's Encore Presentation of a Night race on the City Streets 'O Singapore, which I wryly mused to Thyself is akin to a Triple Negative, El Correctomundo?

Or the part about Damn, that Monegasque Guy sure gets extremely Hot underneath His Balaclava! Making me think of a French Dude with the last name of Grosjean; Aye Karumba!

As I Don't wanna say that the Singapore Grand Prix was a Boring race, albeit mostly processional. Yet instead being a very tactical race of Chess, and who'd Blink First?

Yet this coupled with the TV Pundits focusing upon irrelevant scrums over Positions 14-15-16, and Not being able to S-E-E a Gory Damn thing Occurring On-track, I found my mind Ah-wanderin' per Tipicali.

Thus I took extra notice to the few tidbits Messer Kroftie' threw out during the Sky Sports regurgitated ESPN2 Broadcast, which I knew wasn't gonna be Purdy', especially since we began with le Duesh' chopping off the first 5+ minutes fluff, including the Parade lap. As it was simply Lights Out when the Show began.

Huh? How did Danny Ric', nee Daniel Ricciardo end-up starting P20? Since I know he Qualified P8 on Saturday...

Daniel Ricciardo Fumes over Qualifying Disqualification at Singapore Grand Prix

OH SHIT! Here comes Duh Mothers shoe Polish lady... As we'll return One lap from where we left Off when we "Immediately" resume, Righto Sister?

According to David Kroft, Thars Nothin' Wrong with your TV, that is an Alfa Romeo leading a Grand Prix. As it was Kimi Thee Iceman' Raikkonen's Under-study Antonio Giovinazzi leading his first Grand Prix  ever. Being the first time since the 1983 Belgian Grand Prix at Spa Francorchamps for an Alfa Romeo to lead a Grands Prix; CRIKEYS!

With The Professor' Alain Prost giving Renault a 1-3 finish, with his Junior birdman Eddie "The Mouth!" Cheever third, and Ferrari's Patrick Tambay sandwiched between the two Reggies'

Even more Amazing was the tidbit thrown-out proclaiming it was the First time since Silverstone 2015 when Team Willy' (Williams F1) led the race. Becoming the First time in 4+ years that anybody besides the Top-3, i.e.; Mercedes, Ferrari & Red Bull have led a Grands Prix; SHEISA!

Along with Kroftie' belabouring the factoid  that 'lil Syd Viddle, aka Sebastian Vettel hadn't won a Grands Prix in 392 Days, since Spa 2018!

Sebastian, Leclerc's Faster than You!

And although it was the first time Ferrari's won 3 Races in-a-row since 2008 as the Stats piled-on. Obviously Monsieur "chuck LuhCluck," nee Charles Leclerc, who'd done everything he'd been instructed to by la Scuderia. The 21yr old Monegasque had ample rights to be overly Peeved with how Ferrari had shuffled him to P2 behind Vettel!

For which I swear it was Ferrari Team Boss Mattia Binotto Apologizing in Italian to Leclerc on the Cool-down lap, as the TV Broadcast was rightly having a field Day playing In-Car radio messages...

And whilst I totally believe Leclerc got 100% Hosed! I really couldn't argue with good 'Ol Martin Billybob' Brundle's ARSE-Sessment' of curtly pointing out they (Ferrari) got a 1-2 (finish( instead of a 1-3 due to strategy...

And how come nobody's talking about Valtteri Bottas once again getting told to be the Dutiful Wingman? First being instructed to go Slow in hopes of holding up the grid so Golden Child could possibly catch back up to his rivals. And then further being instructed to Hold Station behind Hamilton to races end.

As once again it Hit Me like A Two Ton Heavy Thing! Feeling somewhat Disillusioned over Formula  1's Machiavellian Team Orders state, making the word Corporatocracy spring to Thy Lips for the very first time regarding thou sport of F1!

As I've had to remind a few Friends that it's the Constructors Championship that only interests the Formula 1 Teams due to its massive Payout scheme of multi-millions each season, and the Drivers championship DON'T Pay Anything!

And Team Orders are nothing new, as Austria-Gate, (2002) Felipe, Fernando is Faster than You and Bloody Hell! Vettel's infamous Multi-21 Affair immediately spring to mind!

Instead I think that it's Team Orders are more Blatant; Err they're just way more transparent nowadays, and I've got to begrudgingly admit, Drivers are just the means to the Teams Financial success.

Which makes it somewhat Harder to Swallow, since I've always had passion for Open Wheel Racing hinge upon individual Drivers accomplishments and not the team's. Even though I'm fully cognizant it's a Team sport, that still Doesn't mean I like seeing a Driver get Screwed for the Team's Benefit!

As what will Vettel's legacy be? Since according to Reuters he's being paid the exorbitant sum of AU $36m per season. Or is that $36 million Dollars? Pounds or Euros? While Ferrari's gonna give Leclerc a  raise to $9m next year vs. his current paltry $3m salary?

Since it appears Vettel's  currently making four times as much as Leclerc, and Ferrari's surely wondering what they're getting for Vettel's services? I'm left ponderin' is Messer Binotto simply trying to Balance his Charges, instill confidence in Sebastian, or simply trying to establish clear Team Orders regardless of who's the better Driver?

Or is it really as simple as getting better Overall results for the coveted Constructirs Cup? And who knows what we'll be talkin' about after Sochi? Where Hopefully Leclerc will be victorious!

IndyCar vs. Formula 1, Portland v Spa

As this is One. This is Two, which is Better? One or Two? This is One, this is Two...

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A year ago now, I scribble that IndyCar's were Far More Compelling than F1, for which once again I felt this way following this past weekend's Double Header.

Even though One fellow Blogger described Portland being pretty much A Snoozer, I for one found it far more interesting vs. the fairly processional Belgian Grand Prix being run at the Mighty Spa Francorchamps, albeit I delighted in the outcome!

As I musta' been Jonesin' for some Open Wheel Racing action? Particularly Formula 1? Since I got up at Bloody DARK-30 both Saturday & Sunday to watch; Err listen to the action live, since somehow I had a feeling this would be a good opportunity for my newest Numero Uno Formula 1 Driver Charles Leclerc, who according to F1 Grizzled Journo' Joe Saward some call Chuck Luh-Cluck; Hya! Could finally Break his Duck; Quack-Quack!

As Thee Monegasque Spanked everybody en route to his third F1 Pole Saturday, with his Wingman 'lil Syd Viddle', aka Sebastian Vettel giving la Scuderia a Front Row lockout ahead of those Pesky silver Arrows.

Even more surprising is the Stat that Leclerc's now Out qualified his four-times F1 World Champion the last Six races in a row!

Yet on this side of Ye Atlantic, Uhm Pacific Ocean, once again the NBC Booth Boyz' were tirelessly Submerging themselves with Non-stop Waves 'O Euphoria Over Colton Herta winning another Pole Position; BARF!

As Newsflash to Leigh Diffey, Paul Tracy and Oh Yeah, Colton's Main Cheerleader Townsend Bell. Uhm, some Dude named FAST EDDIE', aka Ed Carpenter currently has More Career Poles than Herta Jnr' does, HELL! Both Graham Rahal and Gasp, even Marco Andretti have More Career Poles; KAPISHE!

As what do Colton Herta and Danica Patrick have in common? They've both Only won One race...

Getting Up Justin-time' to listen to thou whole Gory F1 Pre-race Dribble, I was surprised to hear Bloody Martin Billybob' Brundle seek-out 'N chat with JPM, nee Monty', aka Juan Pablo Montoya during his Pre-race Grid Walk.

Hot Rumour: Big Spending Racing Point F1 Team Adding Montoya as Driving Coach

As Montoya seemed somewhat cagey when being asked about his involvement with Racing Point F1, Huh? But even better yet was his typical Hipness when being questioned over winning Thee Mythical Triple Crown.

As Montoya Coolly noted I Don't Talk About it when Brundle noted he seemed to have a better chance of winning the Triple Crown. As JPM just casually said, well I did finish third in Class my first time at Le Mans, and it would be nice if it happens, but I Don't really focus on it.

To which 'Ol Kenny Sargent of Speed Freaks Fames would say B-A-M! Take that Alonso! As I've even noticed Simon Pagenaud saying Montoya's got a Better Chance of pulling it off vs. Fredrico Suave'...

Montoya more likely to Win Triple Crown than Alonso, says Pagenaud

As it's pretty funny how ultimately Seb Vettel would play Blocking Back, Err Tail gunner for Leclerc, who basically led Wire-to-Wire, albeit some slight shuffling due to Pit-stops. As I was hoping he'd win and got a Wee Bitamyte Nervous when 'Ol golden Child', nee Lewis Hamilton began nipping at his Heels towards the very end of the race.

Leclerc is only Sixth New F1 Race Winner in last 10 Years

Then Thar was Portland, which I'd been waiting for All weekend long, and had to agree with 'Ol Pt', aka Paul Tracy that Thee Graminator', nee Graham Rahal did pull a Bonsai move Uber reminiscent of the late Greg Moore's. When the Kanuck' went Bombing Down the inside a la Rahal and wiped out seven cars, which I witnessed in person.

Although at least Graham was Man enough to say on Live TV, I Screwed Up! I Don't know What else to Say, other than I Screwed Up! (Ahem Ryan, Did Yuhs Hear that Bully-Ray?) As the first 10-laps were under caution after Rahal ultimately took out five cars; Aye Karumba!

And then back to Yellow on Lap-14 for Ryan Hunter-Reay's Brain-fade against his Andretti Autosport team-mate Alexander Rossi; WTF? As I thoroughly enjoyed the part about Jack "Bloody Nige!" Harvey Clapping Sarcastic Applause directly to Hunter-Reay after being unceremoniously Crashed Out!

As some may classify this race as being a Snoozer, but Hey! Wadda Yuhs expect when One-third of the Field get's eliminated in the first 14-laps? Which Tank Goodness it wasn't the Lights race, since that would have eliminated the entire Grid; YOUCH!

Yet my most favourite part of the entire race was when I Bellowed Out loudly at Thy Telescreen, You Just Got Schooled!

Laughing in grotesque Delight over Colton Herta having run his tyres off under the relentless pressure of Five-times and Reigning IndyCar Champion Scott Dixon hounding him for the first 30-plus laps! Who shot ahead by five seconds the following lap after passing the teenage sensation...

Although it wasn't to be Dixon's day, as suddenly without warning his Battery Quit! Seeing Will Power inherit the lead, for which the Aussie' was pretty non-committal over whether or not he'd have had anything for the Kiwi?

As Power held on, even with the field being packed-up with the race's final caution falling with 8-laps remaining, when Santino Ferrucci retired from his first race of the season.

Seeing Will effectively hold the lead the final four laps to the Chequered Flag to claim his 37th Career victory, tying him for sixth-place Overall, alongside Sealmeister B', aka Sebastain Bourdais.

Although I'll admit that the Kid' Colton did finish fourth, Dutifully Holding Station behind Alexander Rossi, although Josef Newgarden finished P5 and effectively sealed his second IndyCar championship. And Yeah, I know, I know. Thars' Bloody Stupid Double Stuff Bonus Points on Offer; Whatever!

Although he'll have to wait a few weeks now to Skate Away at Laguna Seca to claim his second Astor Cup...