Friday, September 6, 2019

IndyCar vs. Formula 1, Portland v Spa

As this is One. This is Two, which is Better? One or Two? This is One, this is Two...

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A year ago now, I scribble that IndyCar's were Far More Compelling than F1, for which once again I felt this way following this past weekend's Double Header.

Even though One fellow Blogger described Portland being pretty much A Snoozer, I for one found it far more interesting vs. the fairly processional Belgian Grand Prix being run at the Mighty Spa Francorchamps, albeit I delighted in the outcome!

As I musta' been Jonesin' for some Open Wheel Racing action? Particularly Formula 1? Since I got up at Bloody DARK-30 both Saturday & Sunday to watch; Err listen to the action live, since somehow I had a feeling this would be a good opportunity for my newest Numero Uno Formula 1 Driver Charles Leclerc, who according to F1 Grizzled Journo' Joe Saward some call Chuck Luh-Cluck; Hya! Could finally Break his Duck; Quack-Quack!

As Thee Monegasque Spanked everybody en route to his third F1 Pole Saturday, with his Wingman 'lil Syd Viddle', aka Sebastian Vettel giving la Scuderia a Front Row lockout ahead of those Pesky silver Arrows.

Even more surprising is the Stat that Leclerc's now Out qualified his four-times F1 World Champion the last Six races in a row!

Yet on this side of Ye Atlantic, Uhm Pacific Ocean, once again the NBC Booth Boyz' were tirelessly Submerging themselves with Non-stop Waves 'O Euphoria Over Colton Herta winning another Pole Position; BARF!

As Newsflash to Leigh Diffey, Paul Tracy and Oh Yeah, Colton's Main Cheerleader Townsend Bell. Uhm, some Dude named FAST EDDIE', aka Ed Carpenter currently has More Career Poles than Herta Jnr' does, HELL! Both Graham Rahal and Gasp, even Marco Andretti have More Career Poles; KAPISHE!

As what do Colton Herta and Danica Patrick have in common? They've both Only won One race...

Getting Up Justin-time' to listen to thou whole Gory F1 Pre-race Dribble, I was surprised to hear Bloody Martin Billybob' Brundle seek-out 'N chat with JPM, nee Monty', aka Juan Pablo Montoya during his Pre-race Grid Walk.


As Montoya seemed somewhat cagey when being asked about his involvement with Racing Point F1, Huh? But even better yet was his typical Hipness when being questioned over winning Thee Mythical Triple Crown.

As Montoya Coolly noted I Don't Talk About it when Brundle noted he seemed to have a better chance of winning the Triple Crown. As JPM just casually said, well I did finish third in Class my first time at Le Mans, and it would be nice if it happens, but I Don't really focus on it.

To which 'Ol Kenny Sargent of Speed Freaks Fames would say B-A-M! Take that Alonso! As I've even noticed Simon Pagenaud saying Montoya's got a Better Chance of pulling it off vs. Fredrico Suave'...


As it's pretty funny how ultimately Seb Vettel would play Blocking Back, Err Tail gunner for Leclerc, who basically led Wire-to-Wire, albeit some slight shuffling due to Pit-stops. As I was hoping he'd win and got a Wee Bitamyte Nervous when 'Ol golden Child', nee Lewis Hamilton began nipping at his Heels towards the very end of the race.


Then Thar was Portland, which I'd been waiting for All weekend long, and had to agree with 'Ol Pt', aka Paul Tracy that Thee Graminator', nee Graham Rahal did pull a Bonsai move Uber reminiscent of the late Greg Moore's. When the Kanuck' went Bombing Down the inside a la Rahal and wiped out seven cars, which I witnessed in person.

Although at least Graham was Man enough to say on Live TV, I Screwed Up! I Don't know What else to Say, other than I Screwed Up! (Ahem Ryan, Did Yuhs Hear that Bully-Ray?) As the first 10-laps were under caution after Rahal ultimately took out five cars; Aye Karumba!

And then back to Yellow on Lap-14 for Ryan Hunter-Reay's Brain-fade against his Andretti Autosport team-mate Alexander Rossi; WTF? As I thoroughly enjoyed the part about Jack "Bloody Nige!" Harvey Clapping Sarcastic Applause directly to Hunter-Reay after being unceremoniously Crashed Out!

As some may classify this race as being a Snoozer, but Hey! Wadda Yuhs expect when One-third of the Field get's eliminated in the first 14-laps? Which Tank Goodness it wasn't the Lights race, since that would have eliminated the entire Grid; YOUCH!

Yet my most favourite part of the entire race was when I Bellowed Out loudly at Thy Telescreen, You Just Got Schooled!

Laughing in grotesque Delight over Colton Herta having run his tyres off under the relentless pressure of Five-times and Reigning IndyCar Champion Scott Dixon hounding him for the first 30-plus laps! Who shot ahead by five seconds the following lap after passing the teenage sensation...

Although it wasn't to be Dixon's day, as suddenly without warning his Battery Quit! Seeing Will Power inherit the lead, for which the Aussie' was pretty non-committal over whether or not he'd have had anything for the Kiwi?

As Power held on, even with the field being packed-up with the race's final caution falling with 8-laps remaining, when Santino Ferrucci retired from his first race of the season.

Seeing Will effectively hold the lead the final four laps to the Chequered Flag to claim his 37th Career victory, tying him for sixth-place Overall, alongside Sealmeister B', aka Sebastain Bourdais.

Although I'll admit that the Kid' Colton did finish fourth, Dutifully Holding Station behind Alexander Rossi, although Josef Newgarden finished P5 and effectively sealed his second IndyCar championship. And Yeah, I know, I know. Thars' Bloody Stupid Double Stuff Bonus Points on Offer; Whatever!

Although he'll have to wait a few weeks now to Skate Away at Laguna Seca to claim his second Astor Cup...