Friday, October 29, 2010

Will The Incredible Hulk have to go back to his Day Job next year?

Although I don’t think he’s actually done anything super spectacular to earn the moniker The Incredible Hulk, nevertheless 2010 Formula One German Rookie Nico Hulkenberg has done a very decent job for Team ‘Willie this season.

Thus it’s somewhat disappointing to read the current scuttlebutt suggesting he’ll be dropped by Williams Grand Prix Engineering next year in favour of another Rookie named Pastor Maldonado, the 2010 GP2 Champion. As reputedly Maldonado has precious wheelbarrows ‘O Dinero from his Venezuelan state oil company (PDVSA) connections which will serve Williams well next year when key sponsors RBS, (Royal Bank of Scotland) Phillips and Air Asia all walk away, with Mr. Pastor rumoured to possess a staggering cheque written for $15m...

Maldonado to test for Williams

Yet, I’ll guess that the younger Hulk (Hulkenberg) will remain in Formula 1 next year as there appears to be a few seats still available, i.e.; Renault, Lotus, Mercedes and Virgin. But I’d expect Vitaly Petrov to retain his Renault drive for the same reasons as Williams taking on Maldonado, while if I were Tony Fernandes I’d snap-up the young German as ‘KOVY’s (Heikki Kovalainen) teammate for 2011... Although I’d be happier to see him replace the sports elder Statesman DER TERMINATOR, nee M. Schumacher... As I find it hard to fathom that Mercedes wishes to invest three years in the 41yr old multiple World Champion. I mean, isn’t the whole concept of F1 to win either the Drivers or Constructors Championships – preferably both! As I’d love to eat Decklen’s ‘Kangaroo Hat if Herr Schumacher mythically captured his eighth Drivers Crown... But I simply don’t think he’s as hungry for success as Messer Hulkenberg is...

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Lloyd Shines On ‘bout Testing

I have to admit its pretty amusing to see how many fellow Bloggers are now commenting ‘bout Don Kay’s ‘lil Autosport Radio Show, which I’ve been listening too for the past 3yrs...
Thus, I tuned-in once again this Tuesday to listen to Alex ‘PINK Lloyd & Brett Barnhart; Huh? Yuhs means Brian “Braveheart’s” got an older brother also working for the Indy Racing League? As apparently the elder Barnhart is a member of Indy Cars Pit Tech crew which are responsible for Policing ICS Teams rules observance during the racing weekend.

And although I like Alex Lloyd, there’s something ‘bout his monotone droning on in TeamSpeak which seems to grate upon me... Although I found it amusing to hear him ‘Politicking for the inclusion of more testing, noting how previously IndyCar rookies would come into the season with a year’s worth of testing mileage under their belts before going racing full time... With Alex noting how difficult it had been for him to come off the sidelines this year by claiming he’d been merely sitting on the sofa the past two seasons...

To which Don Kay quickly quipped: “That’s NOT all you’ve been doing!” In reference to the fact that The Lloyd’s are expecting child number three on Nov. 12th, their first boy – having had two girls previously. As Don’s quip did garner a rare chuckle from Alex...

And it was entertaining how the entire interview went without any mention of Alex’s teammate - The Wanderin’ Milka, Milkalicious or formally known as Milka Duno... Hmm? Is this part of the ICS departure campaign already?

And I know that the lack of testing in Motorsports is continued to be spurned by the current Global economic plight. But it just seems like a travesty to Mwah. I mean can’t some sort of happy medium be struck? As I believe RASSCAR is going to allow testing to begin again next year, while Formula One has upped its Pre-season Testing allotment from four dates to six.

As I believe that Indy Car previously allowed rookies to test for Teams by giving them extra mileage incentives, which hopefully is carried over for next year? Although I can’t recall there ever being test drivers per sei in Indy Car, it would be nice to see an extra Open Test session or two added to the season. Perhaps hosting two 3-day outings at “Warm” weather venues that aren’t on the Indy Car Series calendar, like VIR, Road Atlanta or Sebring... Or run at Sebring first and the Barber (Barber Motorsports Park) second – in order to miss something called COLD temperatures before kicking off the 2011 ICS season March 27th at St. Petersburg. (Florida)

Then they could run a single 3-day outing on an Oval in the Mid-season, some where’s after Indy, eh? Perhaps some ‘lil Bullring Oval named Milwaukee in order to get the fans & teams ready for its return to the calendar...

And it would be nice if the “powers-to-Be” could send a skeleton TV crew to cover perhaps the final day’s outing of said Open Tests? Or GASP! Perhaps stream it live on le internets via my most tempernental website... Or at least send a couple of the IMS Radio Broadcast crew to cover it “live” via that Super Dooper” webcast thingy!

But these are just some mild suggestions... In regards to Messer Lloyd noting how he and Dale Coyne Racing (DCR) had already burned-up their 2010 testing mileage allotment – like almost all teams have, I’d ASSume? And therefore IndyCar will be going DARK until 2011.

Meanwhile, I’ve resisted the temptation of mentioning perhaps doing an east coast & west coast Pre-season test, simply since the words of Go-Kart Owner Jay “Funnyman” Howard still resonate in my noggin ‘bout how much it would COST in Diesel alone! Although I was thinking about that great little track fondly known as Laguna Seca as my west coast venue; as HELL! Why NOT even throw in the (wishful) idea of at least hosting a Mid-season “Twisty” Open test at someplace called Portland International Raceway? RO-RO! There I go again MISTER CARPETS... (Hey, I can still dream ‘bout it – right?) And when I say the words Open, I mean it should be open to the public, as Sufferin’ Succotash; Indy Car dearly needs to offer their product to EVERY market possible and to any potential future fans... Even those most coveted 10yr olds – even if they bring their 40-something parents along with them...

If you wish to check out the entire Autosport Radio interview with Alex Lloyd & Brett Barnhart – then visit the link below,
Autosport Radio Show – October 24 edition

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Pinballing Gran Primo Piloto’s get Penalized at Korean Grand Prix

Force India’s Adrian Sutil and Scuderia Toro Rosso’s Sebastien Buemi have both come under the wrath of the F1 Stewards after the most auspicious Korean GP and have been given 5-Grid spot penalties for the forthcoming Brazilian GP, with the penalty to Sutil being more important – since Force India is fighting to hold off Williams for sixth place in the Constructors Championship with just two rounds remaining...

Sutil and Buemi get Brazil grid penalties

Hey Virgin! Guess who’s building a new Wind Tunnel...

Just couldn’t resist the jab to Virgin’s Solar-plexus; Hmm? Are you supposed to punch a Virgin in the stomach? OOPS! Sorry ‘bout that somewhat clever Virgin knock, eh? But I digress...

Just noticed the tiny news blurb that Team Lotus 2.0 has announced plans to build a brand new Wind Tunnel at its English premises whilst the squabble for control over the Lotus moniker in formula 1 rolls on... But I’m guessing that Mike Gascoyne is probably the happiest ‘Bloke ‘bout this news, since he’ll be able to remain on home soil for the time being...

Lotus announce plans for a wind tunnel at UK base

Monday, October 25, 2010

Surprise-Surprise! Race Legends event gets Red flagged

Just before I left for my sojourn in Arizona, I received the very kOOL Scandinavian Raceways F1 Nostalgia pamphlet I’d left by accident at the museum in the mail – Thanks to Tanja for getting another and then mailing it all the way from Vaxjo, Sweden to Mwah... And thus, I thought I’d drop “Ticko” a line and see how it went. So you can imagine my surprise when visiting The Race Legends website, I discovered the event had been postponed until 2011 due to economic concerns...

The Race Legends AB retagsrekonstruktion
The company has for the last two months been working intensively to solve the economic situation due to the cancelled and postponed event in Anderstorp. In order to ensure its survival, it was decided in the Stockholm City Court September 7, 2010, upon application by the company’s principals, to put the company in reorganization. This means that all who have demands on the company, both businesses and individuals, will be contacted by a designated administrator shortly. The main focus of the reorganization is that the company will survive and be able to operate properly.
Source: The Race Legends

So perhaps I’ll haveda run off to Anderstorp next May? Uhm? Oh yeah that’s right, I think there’s some little racin’ thingy going on at The Brickyard then, eh?

You can check out my Scandinavian Raceways F1 Nostalgia Museum & Race Legends stories in:

Swedish Day Trippin’

F1 Racing Legends set to invade Anderstorp

Back to the WET Stuff!

When you’re Strange,
Faces come out of the RAIN!
When you’re Strange,
People remember your name?
(When you’re Strange: Lyrics by The Doors)

So there’s nuttin’ quite like being back in the “Jet City” (Seattle) on another bleak, dreary, blustery and overly WET day; CRIKEYS! Which reminds me, a contingent of those ‘BIG BOYZ of Indy Car Fame traveled ‘Down Under to race some Tin Tops in the Australian V8 Supercars series recently... BUTT! Having enjoyed a 10-day respite from ze Confuzer, I have absolutely NO idea of how that event went or almost anything else in Der ‘Vurld ze Motorsporten – Ja Volt!

And NOT that I’m suggesting that Y’all do anything of the sort, please... As after all - ALL of us ‘Vurd Botcherers in BloggerLand are countin’ upon your continued support... Yet it was a nice break away from ze keyboard ‘N stuff... So I haven’t quite gotten back into le Grind; although we did stumble into some PickemUp Truck racing thingy recently... Oh Wait! They’re Turnin’ Left again... Yee Haw!

And I do have a somewhat funny story to recount shortly ‘bout trying to record the just completed inaugural Korean GP... Which I decided to try watching live on the “Tellie” into the very DARK ‘Wee hours of the morning Sunday... Can you say EMBARRASSMENT? At least that’s what somebody should be, i.e.; EMBARRASSED! Since I know that soon to be 80yrs OLD Uncle Bernaughty (Ecclestone) DON’T give a CRAP as long as the race goes on and he gets his 14-figures wired into his account before the Green flag drops!

But C’mon Clowns! That had to be the most ill-advised inaugural Grand Prix hosted in many Moons, eh? As I fell asleep somewhere’s between 1AM-onwards West Coast-Arizona-Seattle-Pacific Time; Oh Never Mind! As I let the show roll-on with 10-laps remaining, in total DISGUST after Master ‘Zebb’s “Reggie” lump when ‘KUH-BLAMOE! F%%K!!! Son ‘O a Bitch! That Frillin’ Fredrico won as I DEJECTEDLY turned off the TV at 2:01AM as soon as that SMUG S.O.B. crossed the line feeling totally GUTTED! Whale probably not as GUTTED as Sebastian felt, eh? SHEISA! (SHIT!) As now the Formula 1 Championship is turned upside down once again; Aye Karumba! As I really wish I knew who it was in the Paddock who recently said he thought Fred Alonso would win the title ‘cause he knows EVERY DIRTY TRICK in the Book! (‘Nuff Said, Eh!)

So now I’m off to see what in Tar nations the Bloggeratzi has been spoutin’ off ‘bout lately... Although I did manage to hear on the news recently that The Judds were goin’ back on tour; Hmm? I’d haveda think that Mr. Dashley has secured enough ‘Coin this season to see out the year for Mrs Dario, right? Unless perhaps Ashley needs to ante up some Dinero for their Trophy room’s Wing, eh? As I’m certain she’ll need to come up with a all new d├ęcor to go along with that Naked Man on the Unicycle; Hya!

Now hopefully I can get this posted before the wind blows out the power!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

ICS:Dario’s Dance ‘N Flash Grenades... Or Heroes vs. Villains?

Now that the IZOD Indy Car Series season is over, and ALL of my channeling, along with a healthy dose of No Fenders Feel Good MoJo heaped upon the “Toowoomba Toranadoe,” nee Will Power, which as Y’all know didn’t do the trick – SHEISA! It seemed like the opportune moment to scribble away some thoughts about the current cast ‘O IndyCarz, eh? Especially with the ‘Predicament TK “Follow your Schnoz” Kanaan currently finds himself in: Can Y’all say Free Agent?

What Should Tony Kanaan do?

As mentioned before, I haven’t got ‘Juan DAMN thingy against Dario “REO Speedwagon” Franchitti, as Clyde asked me whilst in Tacoma over the Homestead weekend; I thought you liked Dario? As I’d rooted for him in years past, but lost a bit ‘O respect for the Flying Scot when I felt he threw his Pit crew underneath the proverbial ‘Bus.


Yet, as I’m guessing most of Yuhs know... I am most happy to see ALMOST anybody win in Indy Cars these days, apart from the two drivers I DESPISE the MOST + a third driver who I DON’T wanna see in victory lane because of his Primary sponsor... As I felt it the “Right-time” to mention this after previously reading ‘Geo Phillips piece about NOT liking Sam ‘I AM Hornish Jr. Who I’ve only rooted for in two different situations; otherwise he’s always sorta bothered me and I cannot say I’ve ever been a huge fan ‘O his...

Making An Unpopular Confession

The first time I took a Shine On to the ‘Hornster was way back in the Dark Dayzes of what many refer to as The Split! As this is the first time I can recall paying any attention to the Indy Racing League beside during the Month of May... As I was absolutely pulling 100% for Mr. Hornish to win the Championship for the “LowBuck” Panther IRL Team (Circa ’02) OVER then newly anointed DEFECTOR Penske from CART... With the second time only being pleased to see him defeat “Marky Marc” (Marco Andretti) at The Brickyard – Hey! After all, he’s an Andretti; YIKES!

Thus the only two drivers I currently DESPISE with great SCURGE is a former Dancin’ FOOL and somebody Y’all know as Princess... Who I’ve taken a liking to calling DannaWho? While I’ve kept my thoughts upon DannyBoy ‘SPIKE Wheldon’s primary sponsor’s presence in the IRL to myself; Kapishe?

Thus the news about Tony Kanaan’s Primary Sponsor 7 Eleven leaving Indy Car in 2011 was a minor surprise, as after all, at least AA Team Owner “Mikey” (Michael Andretti) has previously confessed how keeping sponsors in 2010 ‘N Onwards was gonna be challenging... Hmm? Perhaps he knew of this outcome along with IZOD’s departure?

As Y’all gotta feel a Wee Bit for TK, who seems to be following in the footsteps of somebody named The Chrome Horn, eh? After all, Paul Tracy stayed loyal not only to CART/Champ Car – but Team Owner Gerald Forsythe... And look where it got him! As The Schnoz turned down the ‘Cheepster’s offer in August, 2008 (for whatever reason; could it have been Moohlah?) And re-signed with Andretti Green Racing for a further 5-years, when he coulda taken Wheldon’s TCGR seat instead; which as we all now know Dario’s taken full advantage of!

Thus I’ll Speculate a little, with hopes of THE ‘DAWG NOT accusin’ Mwah of Speakin’ outta his Tailpipe; CRIKEYS! As where can TK go now? As I’ve already read ‘Juan pundit’s thoughts upon a second Panther Racing seat being his best option... OH FUCK! Just as long as that DOESN’T include any whoring for the Nat’l Guard! (Leave it to DannyBoy please!)

While it’d be a Coup for Team England, nee Dryer & Reinbold to add him to their fold, as Justin ‘BIG UNIT Wilson and Mike Conway could reap his considerable Oval track prowess, eh? While the only other Squad I could see benefitting from Kanaan’s Talent – Whale they all could benefit, Err willing to step up to the plate is De Ferran Dragon Racing, with a Darkhorse opportunity being a Satellite Team of TK and Adam Carroll at AFS Racing. Although I hear that Dale Coyne might be looking for a replacement for his No. 18 Racecar? And CITGO could surely pick up Kanaan’s hefty retainer, right?

Yet You’d haveda say that Tony Kanaan’s one of the “Good Guys” in Open wheel Racing and definitely deserves another good opportunity in the eve of his IndyCar career; sorta like Paul Tracy does! As I just hope TK doesn’t get the Oriel Servia shuffle; Aye Karumba! Yet I feel pretty certain that Kanaan will return to IndyCar in 2011 after listening to The Kevin ‘N Cavin Show recently.

And while trying to stay loyal to my MAN ‘THE BIG UNIT, nee Justin Wilson, I haveda admit I’m quite enamoured by Will Power...

Power has already WON!

Friday, October 15, 2010

Off to Arizona in the Ultimate ride...

Whale Otay... So that’s NOT exactly the vehicle I’m Travelin’ Southwards in, but suffice it to say; perhaps it’ll be an early Treat for Mwah... Instead of a Trick, eh? May be the story below is a trick?

Oh Canada, Oh Brother: the GP Limo for six

Thus, I’m off to Arizona and will try to post when possible. – whilst awaiting delivery of my new Ferrari; Hya! Alas Mr. Saward, guess I won’t be joining you in Korea, but may be I can go “Kick some Tyres” once again at Penske’s ‘Mega Dealership in Arizona, eh?

New Ferrari SA unveiled

Here comes the Germans

Having just missed out upon another Oktoberfest – Ja Volt! (Sept. 18 – Oct. 3, 2010) What better time then to squeeze in another long forgotten story flounderin’ round in another No Fenders Wormhole, eh?

Thus, with the surprising return of the TERMINATOR, nee Herr Schumacher, (at the beginning of the year) along with “Quick Nick’s” (Heidfeld) signing at the reconstituted Sauber F1 Team for the remainder of the season, we’ll have a staggering six Formel Ein Deutschland “Hot-Schue’s” on the grid in 2010. (For a second year in-a-row...) Or to put it in an even more illuminating light; we’ll see One Quarter (25%) of the Gran Primo Piloto’s coming from Der Fatherland, Ja-Ja!

(1) Sebastian Vettel - No. 5: Red Bull-Renault
Although Master ‘Zebb has gone to somewhat great pains to make sure Y’all DON’T call him “Baby Schuey…” Nevertheless Michael’s prodigy appears to be the next “Voonderkin” to claim the Formula One spotlight, as I’d consider him currently the Numero Uno German ‘Shue in F1 along with becoming a future Vruld Champion.

(2) Nico Rosberg - No. 4: MERCEDES GP
This seems apparent as Herr Schumacher continues struggling on with his Mercedes MGP W01 chassis and has been thoroughly Outshone by the younger Nico Rosberg, who’s Out qualified ‘N Outraced Michael 12-3 (as of Singapore) this season, as all that’s lacking from Nico’s CV is a maiden Grand Prix victory...

(3) Michael Schumacher - No. 3: MERCEDES GP
Whale, I’d definitely haveda say that DER TERMINATOR’s return has so far to date been a BUST! As Michael at multiple times has seemed DESPERATE to keep the young ‘Whippersnapperz at bay... Not to mention a DISPICABLE SQUEEZE JOB put upon his former No. 2, Err Wingman ‘Rubino (Barrichello) at Hungary this summer! Hmm? Did Y’all think he’d forget his devious ways!

Yet, I suppose its worth mentioning that no less then reigning World Champion ‘JENSE (Button) has pointed out how the Mercedes chassis was an evolution of the BRAWN (“BeeGee”) BGP01 which was designed to suit the Englishman’s ultra-smooth style and NOT ‘Schuey’s Go karting rough ‘N tussle methods...

(4) Timo Glock - No. 24: Virgin Racing-Cosworth
I’m ranking The Glockster above the next two simply for the fact that he’s driving a brand new Racecar, NOT to mention a lowly Virgin that is a 100% CFD affair and the Team couldn’t even design the Fuel Tank to the right dimensions to ensure full race distances at the beginning of the season...

(5) Nick Heidfeld - No. 22: Sauber-Ferrari
Funny enough, this is actually ‘Quick Nick’s third job of the year; having begun as the Mercedes GP Test & Reserve Driver, which offers virtually NO driving duties these days... Before he leapt at the chance to be the Pirelli rubber tester... And then did a “Swap-ola” with Pedro De la Rosa in order to return to a Formula 1 race seat, albeit for the final five races of 2010. Which I’m assuming Nick’s hoping to use as a Springboard to catch another Team’s interest for next year now that Sauber has announced the signing of 20yr old Mexican F1 Rookie Sergio Perez as Kamui Kobayashi’s teammate in 2011.

F1: Perez A Boost For Austin Race Says Hellmund

(6) Adrian Sutil - No. 14: Force India-Mercedes
Although ‘YO ADRIAN’s been performing pretty well this season, and is tipped as a possible replacement for the Mighty ‘Schuey at Mercedes in 2011... If the Scuttlebutt’s true? Sutil seems to still be somewhat erratic and mistake-prone...

GP2 Asia Schedule Announced

Although I believe there’s one remaining round left in this year’s “Main” GP2 Season to be held in conjunction with the Abu Dhabi GP weekend, nevertheless the forthcoming 2011 GP2 Asia calendar has just been release; Click Here.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

The Ultimate Indy 500 Starting Grid!

This is all over ze internets... And splashed about Bloggerland DAMN YOU ‘DAWG! As once again Messer Pressdog has beaten me to the punch, but what a COOL picture, Eh! As it musta been a most monumental planning task, as IMS Hall of Fame Museum director Ellen Bireley claims: “I don’t think we’ve ever emptied the Museum...”

(2010 Indy 500 Centennial Grid; Source:

Indy 500 winners take to the track again

And I found the picture in Daniel’s story on the Official IndyCar Blog, see: An early Morning at the Track

Bernie Bags Russia

After decades of being spurned by Mother Russia, Uncle Bernaughty, nee Mr. Bernard Ecclestone has finally seen his desires come true with today’s announcement that his Bosom Buddy Vladimir has signed on the dotted line...

As reportedly Mister B and Rooskie Supremo Vladimir Putin were in Sochi to announce the formal signing of a contract for the Sochi Grand Prix, which will be held from 2014-2020. And defacto circuit designer Herman Tilke has already laid out another “Tilkie” cookie-cutter venue to pound ‘round the 2014 Winter Olympics grounds, as hopes are to see the resort town ‘Morph into another Monaco...

Russia to join F1 calendar in 2014

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Webber laps Korean Circuit

Now that the Korean GP is officially “ON,” you may wish to check out the following “Virtual” lap of the KIC track narrated by Red Bull Racing’s Mark Webber...

A lap around the Korean circuit by Mark Webber

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Hey Joe! Where’s uze goin’ with that Laptop?

Apparently Grizzled ‘Journo Joe Saward is getting upon his Hobby Horse again... Or perhaps has just been pulling too MANY All-nighters covering the Japanese GP live from Suzuka Circuito, eh? As his latest Digs towards us “Virtual ‘Vurd Botcherers” sounds a little bit like one of Open Wheel Curmudgeon Robin Miller's rants; YIKES! As in it AIN’T REAL unless you’re actually live in “Living Colour” getting’ the story straight from the venue... As hey Mr. Saward, I’d much rather be behind the wheel of the Red Bull RB6 then shuttling racing rubber back ‘N forth to their respective Garage! As I totally get the Spitfire vs. Ack Ack battalion analogy... Just remember NOT all of us have the capability, means or ability to cover the Grand Prix Circus from the racing track – and go Gallivanting around the Globe!

But please keep up the good work – which I look forward to each ‘N every morning. And have fun in Korea...

Ah-h-h, R & R…

Howard and McLaughlin win Go Karting Enduro

Whale! Finally a small bit ‘O Good News for Jay “Funnyman” Howard, whose IndyCar career certainly seems to be a bit of a struggle, eh? As buried in the IndyStar was news of Howard & Co-driver Bill McLaughlin Jr. Having just won this year’s RoboPong 200 Go Kart race at the New Castle Motorsports Park... To read the full story, click here.

Shane Hmiel Critically Injured in Sprint Car Crash

Heard ‘bout this just prior to going south, as this seems like not only a terrible blow for the Hmiel’s – MOST notably Shane... But also the Terre Haute Action Track, which is under the Stewardship of DHK Promotions: A joint venture between Brian Dorsett, Davey Hamilton and Mike King. (Who are trying to revive the track back to profitability and keep its Doors open for Motor Racing events...) As I certainly DON’T think it’s their fault or the track’s. As it just sounds like a very FREAKY racing accident that has caused Shane Hmiel to be placed in a medically induced Coma to combat his brain swelling – SHIT! As I really enjoyed the interview Messer Shane did with Don Kay earlier this year on Autosport Radio.

As obviously – hopefully he’ll recover from this frightening incident quickly; as I still do NOT understand how his USAC Silver Crown Sprint Car’s Roll cage could be completely torn off; SHEISA! So get BETTER soon Shane!

Shane Hmiel on "long road to recovery" after surviving frightening wreck

UPDATEAccording to Don Kay: Shane has successfully undergone both neck and back surgeries – as both were broken and has NO discernable brain injuries!

Korean Grand Prix gets Approval

With all of the rule bending ‘N bending over backwards to make sure that the inaugural Korean Grand Prix would go ahead this year as planned... You really had to believe that it would ultimately get rubber-stamped by the FIA, as after all what official Sponsor role does LG hold with the FIA? Thus although the ‘Ash-fault is extremely fresh... Who Yuhs gonna call Charlie? As Uncle Bernaughty had already told the world that the Korea GP was a GO – END of Story; Kapishe! Which means Charlie Whiting’s hands were basically tied behind his back as he coolly pronounced the circuit to be “Satisfactory.” (“Wink Wink – Nudge Nudge”) And thus the Show will go On! So looks like you’d better pack your bags Joe...

Green Light For The 2010 Korean Grand Prix Following FIA Inspection

Daly to test for GP3 Teams

Spotted this over at Junior Open Wheel Talent, as Ryan has pointed out that Rising Open Wheel Star Conor Daly will test for two GP3 teams in the near future, which means we could see another ‘Yank contesting the European waters in 2011...

Conor Daly set to test GP3 car with Manor Motorsport and Status Grand Prix

Sunday, October 10, 2010

DON’T look behind the Curtain...

Err, actually I meant I CANNOT look at ze internets... As I haven’t yet watched the recording of the Suzuka Grand Prix, albeit I did watch the entire Qualifying session, the Pre-race and the actual start up to the very first SPEED commercial break before calling it a night...

So it’s kinda funny having to remain in a “Virtual” News Blackout whilst trying to squeeze-in the Japanese GP – Hopefully sometime Monday, Eh! When I’ll try watchin’ le Memorex – which I taped in the wee hours of Sunday...

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Suzuka Memories

Sounding like a broken record; it’s hard to believe that your Humble Scribe was last at Suzuka Circuito six years ago... As all of the talk ‘bout the impending wet stuff, nee precipitation in the form of a massive 2-inches made me flash back to that most adventurous trek to Suzuka in the most appalling conditions! Which I laboriously scribbled ‘bout in: Suzuka, 2004.

After having driven all the way from Sasebo to Suzuka – with the rain’s intensity increasing the closer we got to the track. Hey! I CANNOT see anything ahead of me – our Driver proclaimed! We were shocked to be told by our Super Host Yasushi: “Suzuka; NO go! Qualifying CANCELLED due to Typhoon...” WTF? As little did I know I’d be on hand for History being made two years in a row, as the year prior DER TERMINATOR, a.k.a. Michael Schumacher would clinch his record breaking sixth World Championship there, albeit with somewhat of a dubious drive, Pinballing his way home to eighth place.

And it seems somewhat Karmic or Symbiotic that Bruno Senna’s maiden Formula 1 outing at the Japanese Grand Prix would be on the 20th Anniversary of his late Uncle’s (Ayrton) purposely spearing his Arch Nemesis “the Professor’s” (Alain Prost) Scuderia Ferrari emblazoned with the No. 1 in retaliation for the year’s prior incident when Prost collided with Senna at exactly the same locale in order to clinch his third World Championship; which Professor Matchett & ‘Hobbo both referred to as: The Prost-Senna chicane. Which I believe is actually denoted as the Casio Triangle...

Thus it was interesting to hear “Willie Buxom’s” testimonial of riding in a Two-seater with Bruno in Abu Dhabi over the Singapore – Suzuka break... (Talk ‘bout living a Charmed life, Eh!) As Messer Buxton explained how nauseating the ride was; with Senna wanting to demonstrate how VIOLENT a modern F1 car is, as the ‘Backmarkers all struggled to drive a Pig ‘O a Racecar whilst looking in their mirrors all race long! And their 2X Seater’s ‘Grunt was only equivalent of a modern day GP2 Asia chassis; CRIKEYS! (As Bruno was 6-seconds adrift of Vettel in Friday’s Practice 2...) So it would be nice if Mr. Buxton could scribble out his thoughts ‘bout this on The Buxton Blog...

Senna not worried about F1 pressure

Whale at least Bruno’s Part time teammate Sakon Yamamoto was back alongside him... Naturally “Just-in-Time” for the Japanese GP, as the SPEED Boyz – namely David Hobbs pointed out just how overly twitchy the Hispania chassis looked Ontrack as Sakon slithered about; Aye Karumba!

Whilst the most entertaining? Story of Friday’s SPEED commentary was about the Scuderia Toro Rosso Mechanic who was fired after the Singapore race for having simply mopped up Jaime Alguersuari’s water leak some 5hrs prior to the event... Before Alguersuari was forced to start from Pitlane at Singapore as the Mechanics thrashed to make repairs on said leaky radiator; OOPS!

And a la Singapore, the Red Bull Duo was once again Untouchable during the first two Practice sessions, with Master ‘Zebb leading Mark Webber, followed by “The Krakow Kid” (Robert Kubica) and “Fredrico Suave.” (Alonso) While ‘JAGUAR (Hamilton) walloped the wall in FP1, ripping off his Left front suspension and causing a ‘Mega rebuild of his chassis. Which allowed him only a scant 8.5min Ontrack in the Afternoon session... But as Bob Varsha pointed out: Who was fastest in Singapore before Qualifying and the Race? Yep, Yuhs guessed it... Seb Vettel, who seemingly got dusted off by Alonso; SHEISA!

2010 Drivers ChampionshipP1) Mark Webber; 202 points
P2) Fernando Alonso; 191 pts
P3) Lewis Hamilton; 182 pts
P4) Sebastian Vettel; 181 pts
P5) Jenson Button; 177 pts
(As of Round 15 – Singapore)

Thus having awaited F1 Debrief on SPEED; what the HELL! I might as whale stay-up for Qualifying, eh? Especially since I’d like to find out Weather or NOT! They’re able to squeeze in the three ‘Qualie sessions. CRIKEYS MATES! PULL YOUR ARSES OUT AND CANCEL THE BLOODY THING! After Clyde & I both lamented last weekend how we’d like to be at Suzuka this year... I’m thinking may be it was best to not be SOAKING WET! SHEISA! I mean C’mon Uncle Bernaughty – Pull the Plug... As what a shame for those Zillions of ‘Mega Devoted Japanese Fans – Who ALL should be given a refund!

So I’m guessing History will repeat itself? As Messer Buxton interviewed RBR Team Boss Christian Horner who said: “We’re ALL looking at the same weather radar picture – and it doesn’t look like it breaks ‘til 8PM.” (Saturday night) So why all of the STUPID delaying tactics Bernie... OOPS! Guess I’ve prattled on long enough ‘bout that, right? Just tell me when to reset the BLOODY ‘Ol VCR - Otay?

So having scampered off to finish poondin’ out this mesmerizing story... I missed the final moments of the SPEED Qualifying Broadcast... But at 11:39PM West Coast/Seattle Time; Oh Never Mind! The Powers to be finally realized they could NOT Postpone any further what had been obvious to everyone on Pitlane. As Will Buxton chatted up his new Mate Bruno Senna during the rain delay, where Senna quipped: “With this much rain I think we’d need a hull and a propeller on the back...” (To go anywhere) So Qualifying will be held on a Sunday for the second time in F1 history, slated for 4hrs prior to race... As I have NO idea when SPEED will air this?

Qualifying to take place on Sunday

So, who’ll win the Race? And will ‘Aussie Mark Webber still be leading the Drivers World Championship? You Make the Call – As I think I’m off to Tacoma once again...

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Cool Ben Spies Videos...

(Ben Spies; Source:

On a lighter note from the tragedy of Jesse Phibbs: I’ve just stumbled upon the latest two video clip interviews with “Captain kOOL!” Nee Ben Spies, where he talks extensively ‘bout his Indy and Aragon MotoGP races... Check it out!

Ben Spies Interview on Indy and Aragon MotoGP

Indy Flat track Rider Succumbs to Injuries

IndyStarz’ Kurty Cavin has just reported the sad news that 21yr old Canadian Flat track Rider Jesse Phibbs has perished from his Head injuries suffered during the Indianapolis MotoGP weekend, during Saturday night’s Flat track event at the Indiana State Fairgrounds...

Motorcycle racer in Fairgrounds crash dies from injuries

F1: Paddock Notes - October 7th Edition

Originally I had broken this down into three separate stories... But the amount of “Breaking News” just never quite ends, eh? As not only does Formula 1 NEVER Sleep; Nor does Motorsports, and thus here goes the first installment of what may become a new No Fenders winter segment?

F1 vs. CO2?
As those Fine Folks of Law & Order would say, this story is literally ripped right from the Headlines... Albeit I spotted it at Grizzled ‘Journo Joe Saward’s Grand Prix Blog instead, and it’s an interesting tease ‘bout what the Williams F1 Team has been doing to lower its Carbon Footprint the past few years...

How to be an environmentally-friendly F1 team…

And speaking if Williams; Suzuka will formally conclude the Rubens Barrichello 300th Grand Prix Victory Tour – So nice job ‘Rubino!

Rubino to Crack 300 GP Barrier

Sauber inks Perez and Telmex, while Kobayashi looks forward to going Home
Another rumour comes true... As the Sauber F1 Team, which in Football lingo is in a Rebuilding mode; as Peter Sauber seeks to revamp his Minnowesqe Team from its former Bavarian Auto Giant Days, has just announced the inking of 20yr old Mexican GP2 runner-up Sergio Perez, who brings along with him the Richest Man in the World’s Telmex backing... As Perez will partner “K-Squared,” (Kamui Kobayashi) beginning in 2011...

Perez will become the first Mexican Gran Primo Piloto in Formula 1 since Hector Rebaque drove for Uncle Bernaughty’s (Ecclestone) Ownership of Brabham in the early 1980’s.

Cinco de Mayo

It’s also worth noting that rising Mexican F1 Hopeful Esteban Gutierrez, whose also under contract to Sauber, is also sponsored by Telmex: Thus is Gutierrez an insurance policy or Odd Man out; or is he potentially Kobayashi’s future replacement?

Meanwhile Kamui Kobayashi whose just been anointed as a Japan Honourable International Ambassador, a Sports Tourism Master; Aye Karate! (Hya!) Is looking most forward to competing in his inaugural Home Grand Prix at Suzuka this weekend, where he burst upon the Formula One scene a year ago as Timo Glock’s substitute...

Q+A with Kamui Kobayashi

Lotus Racing announces new Drivetrain partner
Not surprisingly, on the heels of the current Lotus Racing F1 Team and Cosworth announcing the Official early disolvement of its 3-year contract for Engine supply; Lotus has now announced that it will become a Red Bull Technology (RBT) Customer for 2011 and onwards. RBT will supply Lotus Racing with Gearbox and Hydraulics package to mesh with the Customer Renault Engine it will be running in 2011, so watch for Team Lotus 2.0 to potentially make waves next season, as I’ll be looking forward to ‘KOVY mixing it up with the Big Boyz...

INDYCAR: Paddock Notes - October 7th Edition

I’m sure Y’all have heard the recent news that 7 Eleven has decided to withdraw its title Sponsorship from Tony Kanaan’s No. 11 Andretti Autosport IndyCar for 2011, leaving TK potentially without a ride next season... As “Mikey” (Michael Andretti) has apparently told Kanaan he’s free to seek employment elsewhere as he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to keep Tony in the AA fold next year... As Kanaan who’s reportedly making some where’s north of $3.0 million a season must be second guessing his decision to not sign with TCGR, eh?

Obviously TK just vaulted to the front of the line for desired Drivers in IndyCar for 2011 – Which could see him land elsewhere. Just hope he doesn’t get the Oriel Servia treatment! While THE ‘DAWG also notes how I might haveda drop the moniker ‘The IZOD Dude outta Ryan Hunter-Reay’s name next year...

Holy Schnikes: TK, Danistar and RHR Sponsorship REEEEMIX
Highcroft To Join IndyCar?
As I noted in my Petit LeMans Postscript Tuesday, I caught the first whip of “Symone,” (Simon Pagenaud) and NOT “Simona-Simona,” (Simona De Silvestro) who prefers to not be called the Swiss Miss... During Simon’s taped interview upon Speed Freaks Sunday night – where he divulged he’d been testing an IndyCar and laid out the following scenario that SPEED’s Marshall Pruett has just written about.

INDYCAR: Highcroft Eyes Limited 2011 Campaign
KVRT Aligns with Sullivan for Indy 500
Though they may wanna rethink the Team’s name to “Krash Vulnerable Rebuilt Tubs;” Hya! Hey, I’m just Joshin’ here Folks... As I’m a Fan of Vasser, Viso ‘N Sato, albeit not overly keen upon Kevin K... Whale Otay, perhaps I’m just jealous of ‘Ol Smiley Face, eh? (NOT!) But I digress, as ICS Curmudgeon Robin Miller has just written how the Figure-8 Champions ‘O IndyCar have announced a one car partnership with James “Sully” Sullivan; Hmm? Where do I know that name from? And SH Racing for the 2011 I500.

INDYCAR: KV Partners With SH Racing For Indy 500

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

ALMS: 2010 Petit LeMans Postscript

(Doran Ford GT-R; Source:

Whale it almost seems like an afterthought this year, as in previous year’s there’s been the wonderful influx of Starz from the IndyCars... Or was that CART with the BIG NAME STARZ ‘N Indy Racing League’s got ALL of the Cars; Oh Never Mind!

As it would have been fun to have actually seen the mighty Audi R15’s and Peugeot 908 HDI FAP’s in person, eh? As these two Auto Giants once again went head-to-head for the Overall victory, which would become a Peugeot 1-2 sweep after reading of the most bizarre explanation for losing a race... As suddenly Dindo Capello needed to pit his No. 7 Audi R15 as he reported his Ballaclava was slipping from its helmet insert and blocking his vision; Aye Karumba! As the unexpected Pitstop put the Audi 1-lap behind, eventually having to settle for the Podium’s final step...

Team Peugeot Total takes 1-2 at Petit Le Mans

Who’s ‘Dat?There was some Cat name Rene Villeneuve listed in the Planet LeMans spotter Guide; Huh? As I went to his website and had “Lucy” (My esteemed Screen-reader) read his “Bio,” which didn’t’ seem to shed any light upon any Genealogical links to Jacques ‘N Gilles... As it appears he’s just somebody else flaunting a famous Sir name, eh?

Franchitti DoubleAnd while Elder Brother “REO Speedwagon” (Dario) was garnering all of the press for winning the 2010 IndyCar Championship, the younger Marino was part of the three driver lineup for Highcroft Racing, with David Brabham and Simon Pagenaud who finished fourth Overall and took the LMP2 Class victory along with the P2 Championship. Giving Highcroft its second consecutive Championship with its various guises of Honda ARC chassis, after having defeated De Ferran Motorsports for the LMP1 title last year...

Interestingly, in his taped Speed Freaks interview Sunday night, “Symone” (Pagenaud) divulged that he has been testing an IndyCar and is hopefully going to be able to race in the Indy Car Series in 2011, albeit he wouldn’t say with who or for how many events...

Battle Royale
Yet my interests laid most closely with the ‘Mega Scrum set to occur in GT2, which appeared to be the most fiercely contested class in the ALMS Season Finale... As I was most interested in years past what would have been a proud Ford Flotilla, as there were three Doran Design Ford GT’s entered along with two TaTa Motors Jaguar XKR’s running under the Rocketsports banner.

Doran Ford GT-R

As it would have been fun to see Ye ‘Ol “SaidHead” (Boris Said) mixin’ it up in the GT2 trenches; as Said was entered alongside Brandon Davis and Townsend Bell in the ACS Express Racing No. 10 Doran Design Ford GT which sadly was listed as DNS, (Did Not Start) with no further details given. Going to ACS’s website only revealed that the Team is owned by Mike Davis, who I believe is an ex-Trans Am Piloto? And that the Team was using Petit LeMans as a tune-up for the 2011 ALMS season.

And the other four “Feurd” variants faired little better as Paul Gentilozzi’s Jaguar’s XKR’s both suffered early race maladies and both retired fairly early into the race, whilst the Robertson Racing Ford GT No. 40suffered from accident damage. But the “Privateer” Team was making a bit of it’s own history by entering a pair of the striking Ford GT’s for the very first time ever as the ‘Seester Car, the No. 04 which suffered a starter problem finished as the highest ranking member of this Quintet, finishing 19th Overall and seventh in class.

Meanwhile the Corvette Boyz snatched their debut GT2 victory on the very final lap when the leading Risi Competizione Ferrari of Tony Vilander ran out of fuel, dropping to third-in-class, while Scotty Sharp’s Extreme Speed Motorsports Ferrari F430GT vaulted into the Classes runner-up position.

And Meesh will undoubtedly be pleased to know that her ‘Hero “Booby Ray-X’s” (Bobby Rahal) Rahal Letterman Racing’s BMW Squad won the Manufacturer’s title with a fourth place finish...

Monday, October 4, 2010

INDYCAR: Homestead Thriller – Sorta, NOT!

Whale Otay, I’ve spent the past Day-and-a-Half consoling myself... As I have absolutely nuthin’ against Dario “REO Speedwagon” Franchitti; BUTT! As Y’all ready know – I was simply rootin’ instead for the “Toowoomba Toranadoe,” a.k.a. Will Power to become this year’s Indy Car Series Champion...

Trekking Southwards to (“Aunty”) Harriet Village, I was unaware of the day prior’s outcome, where a quick glance in the mighty TNT (Tacoma News Tribune) a scant two and a half hours before Race time revealed that DRAT! Messer Dario had taken the Pole and hence whittled Power’s Championship lead by a further point, to a most precarious 11 markers...

Franchitti scores critical pole at Homestead

Thus having decided to stay over another day in order to watch the Season Finale, at 2:21PM, (Pacific/Seattle/West Coast/PST) a scant 1hr 39mins ‘til the Green flag dropped, Clyde said; C’mon Tomaso – you’re gonna help me move the boat trailer up at Uncle Tom’s Cabin... SHEISA! BUTT... I’m waiting to watch the race and need to eat some lunch first! (After all, that is why I stuck around, Eh!) Oh Shut-up – it’s NOT even Three O’clock yet! Hurry up and finish eating your sandwich... Then Clyde disappeared; where’d he go? As I walked a short distance up ‘N down the Drive looking for him; Otay Buckaroo, you’ve got exactly 65 minutes until I need to be back in front of le ‘Telescreen! As off we went to move said trailer... As Clyde sez; it AIN’T even 3-O’clock yet as I informed him its 2:57PM.

Thus having moved said boat trailer to its new resting spot, Clyde had me back in front of the ‘Tellie by 3:30PM, as I’d vowed to NOT watch any of that overly long ‘Hypefest more commonly known as the Versus IndyCar Central Show... (YUK!) As I checked my clock which rang 3:34PM as I was anxiously awaiting it to be time to warm-up the TV.

Thus as the mine-nutes ticked down, at 3:48PM I decided it was high time to find out where the TV’s “Clicker” was residing, (hidden) as it almost bit me... As I calmly thought, hey I can work this ‘Juan too since it’s the same all knowing comca$t remote control I’ve been forced to acquire in order to run my DIGG it ‘Tul box at home, to which I’d quickly discover: WRONG! As I somehow magically managed to mess le Telescreen UP! SHEISA! As Mary Ellen informed me; Uhm, you’re not even pointing it at the TV or Digital box... As by some crazy way I managed to make the picture disappear with only sound coming out, albeit a distorted audio feed with a large amount of interference; WTF? You’ve gotta be kidding, right? As I’ve been calmly waiting all day just in order to SCREW UP the Television just moments before the Green flag drops; CRIKEYS! As I suddenly had 5-people trying to figure out what in TARNATIONS I’d done to the all knowing DIGG it ‘Tul controller...

Thus we missed the Opening laps as David came to our rescue and quickly returned the picture to synch-up with the garbly audio, and viola... We were back to a normal Television picture with Bob, Jon & Robbie’s voices crisply booming out at a high decibel level in order for Aunty Harriet to be able to hear it... (Who’s ‘Dat guy?)

Thus I became resigned to rootin’ for anyone BUT Dario to win the FREAKIN’ race! As my tension steadily mounted as Power seemed to be in a Catch-up mode the entire race, as Franchitti seemingly was puttin’ on a driving Clinique; CRAP! Knock-it OFF Dario, Yuhs hear? As the Flying Scot remained out front ‘N ahead of Power the entire race... Piling the pressure upon will by what appeared to be effortlessly leadin’ the MOST laps to snatch another 2-points and thus claiming all three bonus points which wouldn’t help Will Power’s cause; Aye Karumba!

And then it simply went up in smoke on lap 134 as all I heard was Jon Bekhuis’s voice quietly saying I think its Will Power who’s brushed the wall and brought out the yellow flag; OH CRAP! As after it was shown on replay and Robbie “Purple” Floyd blathered on ‘bout how it WEREN’T over yet... Uh, yeah Robbie; IT IS! I bellowed out SHIT! Before sayin’ sorry Auntie Harriet... SHEISA-SHEISA-SHEISA!!! As I felt absolutely GUTTED! And could only imagine how Messer Will felt!?! Although we stayed with the program to the bitter end, as I wryly commented Take him out Milka! Although I wouldn’t take any solace in Power backing into a title that way... As Dario dodged the Wanderin’ Milkalicious to finish P8 and secure his third Championship by a scant 5-points ahead of ‘Aussie runner-up Will Power...

As we only watched the first few interviews to which all I could do was laugh as Dario & Co. seemed way too giddy and simply blew off LyndieCar’s interview as I said Yuh’s can Shut ‘er OFF as I DON’T wanna watch any DannaWho? Interviews!

And thus as we prepared to go Grocery shopping for our evening’s supper, I went out ahead to the Drive and screamed as loud as I could at the empty Commencement Bay FUCK! As I tried to get over my disappointment of Will Power having clearly been outclassed by Dario Franchitti... So Congrats Dario, and better luck next year Will!

Random Thoughts On Homestead
Thus having watched my tape-delayed version of Wind Tunnel, until after having waited to hear an interview with “Symone Pagenoe” (Simon Pagenaud) on Speed Freaks... (Sunday evening) I could only chuckle when the self anointed Windbag (Dave Despain) asked for Dario’s impression of the new Overall ICS Championship Trophy, (which I still AIN’T seen) getting so much LUV by the Bloggaratzi... To which Dario calmly replied; Oh you mean the Naked Man on a Uni-cycle? Hya! Typical Franchitti Humour!

Championship Contendors Defect from Series on Eve of Season Finale