Monday, January 15, 2018

The Tomaso Files: Random Thoughts Upon life via The Oregon Trail ...

No Fenders Doggytrain' at Heceta Head Beach near Florence, Oregon. Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen with Doggies' on leash and is pulling Tomaso via his white cane. Thy esteemed Mad Molly is leading the pack on the right. Then thou Pixolator, (Pixie) Mary Ellen and No Fenders Head Scribe Tomaso as the Caboose. (The Tomaso Collection)
Nah, Won't say that Uhm? Ged' Along 'lil Pardner; Yah! Yah! Mush!

Hopefully, Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen, Pixie-the-Wonderdog; WUF-WUF! Be Quiet Silk; Hya! And thou never ending scribe Tomaso wilts Art thoust beeth somewhars' upon the Oregon Trail, rumblin' towards Warshington, as it's my Christmases break in January, having never quite shut Ye No Fenders BLOB' Down over Thar Holidazes; Yah, Yah, Mush!

As Once Upon a Time I used to regale Y'all 'bout taking two weeks off over Christmas, a la that fine black & white paper magazine called Ontrack I subscribed to Waybback Yonder! Especially now whilst tryin' to poond out a few more riveting BLOB stories before leaving; but I digress...

Having struggled to focus solely upon my latest CD Audiobook selection, made for me by Ruth, one of my friendly local Librarian Assistants. It seemed quite Apropos, after checking thou book out a second time, I'd finally settle down to listen to I-T just before leaving for California's Redwoods and a Roadtrip back North Eh!

The book's titled: The Oregon Trail: A New American Journey by Rinker Buck, published in 2015. And what struck Thy Fancy, besides the Pioneer Spirit, along with the author's crazy desire to travel the entire Oregon Trail via Mule-drawn Wagon, with his brother as the Mule Team Driver! Was the brief portion 'bout a pioneering woman named Narcissa Whitman.

As my only critique of Narcissa is her professional choosing, since I cannot help but think of Timothy Egan's interesting book Short Nights of The Shadow Catcher.

A book about Edward S. Curtis's prolific attempt to capture Native American Tribe's authentic Heritage, primarily upon his famous plate glass photography, before Disappearing. Where Egan points out how the white Christian Missionaries set about converting Native Americans into the "White Man's" Christian Doctrine via forced Schooling, attempting to eliminate the Native American's ancestral culture...

But what most impressed Mwah 'bout Narcissa Whitman, was not only was she the first woman to successfully travel the then still undefined Oregon Trail in 1836, but that she made much of the trip while being pregnant!

Hence, this set my mind racing towards the thoughts of le Femmes', the Fairer Sex, and their unquestionable tenacity! And thus, why are we trying to set them back a further generation with this sullied European notion of a Female's Only Women's Motor Racing league!

Ana Bia' Beatriz heading into Turn 1 at 225 mph on the second lap of her Qualie' attempt for the 2013 Indy 500. (The Tomaso Collection)
Having realized that in my thirty-plus years of following Open Wheel Racing, I've never witnessed a Female participate in any Formula 1 activity in person around the Globe! Since they've been given sparse opportunity! As it was nearly two dozen years before Susie Wolff got her token chance with Team Willy.

As the only Femme Fatales I've witnessed racing in the flesh in thee Top Echelons were primarily at Portland International Raceway, where Lyn St James flew Solo. Before crossing over to thou Bevy 'O Femme Fatales at Mother Speedway...

Whilst it's hard to believe, sorta', that it's a decade now since I first attempted chronicling female racers...

Abigail Scott, another pioneer woman, who I believe the author spends great time musing 'bout her riding Side Saddle, possibly noting that she rode this way across thee entirety of thou Oregon Trail; Me Thinks? As she was also noted for her detailed Journal during her family's crossing, which was an assignment given to the 17 year old Adventurer.

As once again, thou Karmic Whip, Ged' Along TOMASO KEEEE-RACK! Hits me when searching for information upon Miss Abigail, who's riding Side Saddle seems to have something to do with women not getting their Dresses Dirty! For those few women provocative enough to ride Horses on the journey!

As this Oregon Trail Tenderfoot, after marrying would go onto publish her own Woman's Pro Suffrage Newspaper, The New Northwest, with fierce opposition from her younger brother Harvey Weinstein; ZOINKS! Y'all knew that was coming, righto? Err, Harvey Scott and The Oregonian Newspaper he was the longtime Editor of.

Although women wouldn't be granted the right to vote in Oregon until 1912, with legislation being defeated five times, including fierce opposition voiced by Mr. Scott and his Oregonian Newspaper.

Suffrage legislation finally succeeded in Oregon, signed into law by Governor Oswald West., who asked Abigail to write the Proclamation for the 19th Amendment, which sadly, Abigail would pass away before Women were finally granted the right to vote nationally in 1920!

Since naturally, ironically Oswald West State Park is one of my favourite places to stop along the trip to 'n from thou "Other Florence!" Which may be, if it's not too Cold, Wet, Rainy 'N Nasty; We'll stop at to take the Hoonds, and Tomaso on a Walkabout?

Meanwhile, once again whilst bobbing in thou ever frothing Seas 'O Synchronicity circling Thy Isle of Nofendersville. I came across another unknown female Pioneer, albeit this time of someone most likely having way less notoriety.

As I'd definitely never heard of Mamie Johnson, who was the only female to ever pitch Baseball in the oft, forgotten Negro Leagues.

With another modern day female activist embracing the Pioneer Spirit, Janet Benshoof also catching my Attenzione upon thou Daily News Trawl of the New York Times...

To continue reading more Haberdashery from thou Oregonian Trail trek, see; The Tomaso Files: More Wild Buffalo Tailz' from The Oregon Trail

No Fenders Doggie Train photograph c/o Clarity Pictures
BIA' photograph c/o No Fenders ‘Offical Photographer CARPETS'

Thursday, January 11, 2018

RETRO: An Oft, Overlooked Cool Californian...

Saleen's "BOSS!" 730bhp Championship Commemorative Mustang. (Image source:
Who's probably better known for his Automobiles then his racing career...

Whilst your Humble No Fenders Scribe is hopefully on thou Road, Headed Northwards from California ridin' shotgun with Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen, Pixie-the-Wonderdog; WUF-WUF! And Knock that Barking Off Silk!

ARSE-Sumedly we'll be north of California's unbelievable Fire Destruction, notably from thou Santa Anna winds and thou terrible Thomas Fire, which Thankfully is now contained!

As I-T came to Mwah, when posting that Saleen Whiteout post, just how many people know 'bout the proprietor of those wicked Fast Mustangs? And although Thars' a slew of Cool Cats from California, with the top three popping to mind being "Rocket Rick, Joe Cool" and Jimmy Johnson, the racing driver, Not Duh football Coach; Hya! While not sure how cool 'Ol Robby Dirtman' Gordoun (Gordon) is?

Although "Rocket Rick" Mears grew up in Bakersfield, CA, he was born in Gulp, Wichita, Kansas. While naturally with the flurry of 'Ol Pigskin activity currently, I thought of Joe Montana, the original "Joe Cool" Me Thinks? But 'Ol Montana was born in PA, not CA...

Yet this meandering prose is 'bout racers' from "the Raisin State;" Hya! Hence I thought of thou original TK", Tommy Kendall, Billy Auberlen, Scott Scooter' Pruett, (Townsend) T-Bell' and Alexander Rossi, the new "Joe Cool" to name a few...

What's Dat? You say what 'bout Jeffrey "Pretty-boy Floyd" Gordon? Uhm, although he's certainly Cool, and was born in Vallejo, CA; Oh Never Mind!

But this meandering prose is supposed to be about a Californian from Inglewood, originally. Who's made quite the career by producing a bevy 'O Fire Breathin' specialty Aftermarket Signature vehicles, most notably FoMoCo's eponymous Mustang!

Yeah I know, Fire Jokes AIN'T funny in California right now...

Alas, it's funny, Ha-Ha! But when I thought about the man in Questione when beginning this elongated rant, I thought of his Championship winning Racetruck instead; Hya! Although I was always mildly intrigued by those Uber Narly Ford Ranger Racetrucks.

Whilst how many people know he contested the 1989 Championship Auto Racing Teams (CART) season? For which ARSE-Sumedly, I saw him putterin' round the tail-end 'O grid at Portland?

Otay, for those of Yuhs who haven't figured out who I'm ramblin' on 'bout, his name is Steve Saleen, albeit the picture should have given I-T away, Eh?

First off, Messer Saleen finished third overall in Formula Atlantic in 1980, behind series champion Jacques Villeneuve and '79 Atlantic champion Tom Gloy, who missed three races due to having moved up to CART.

Then after Rompin' thru Trans Am, Steve apparently ran just a partial CART campaign in '89, running a year old March 88C Cosworth under his own Saleen Auto Express banner, with a best finish of 12th at Toronto. Culminating in 31st Overall with a single point scored.

And contrary to popular belief by thou, didn't race at Portland that year, which is odd since it would have been part of the West Coast swing, as Steve's first finish was 14th at Long Beach, while he failed to qualify at Indianapolis that year.

As Saleen and another driver named Lazier, as in Buddy Lazier the eventual 1996 Indy 500 winner - both crashed on Day 3 of Qualifying, Saturday May 20th, with neither driver making "The Show."

Whilst ironically it was another Cool Californian' named Scott Pruett winning Co-Rookie Of the Year Honours at Mother Speedway for Truesports, alongside Bernard Jourdain...

Yet my strongest memories of Saleen's racing efforts seem to revolve around the Saleen Allen R-R-R Speedlab Racing effort of '96, when he teamed with noted Comedian Tim Allen for that year's SCCA Pro Racing's World Challenge series, with some Ringer' known affectionately as Bondo', aka Bob Bondurant as Thar third team-mate.

While my internal Stang' Hoof beats still fondly recall his pair of Awesome Saleen GT2 Class Mustangs run at Le Mans in '97 with wild running Horses motif - purposely running the numbers 66-67 in true Shelby lore.

While I last followed Saleen's racing efforts in earnest in the early 2000's, when the Konrad Motorsports Saleen S7LM was always a factor at Circuit de la Sarthe.

Alas, thanxs to my friend Rob, who introduced Mwah into the world of Ford Motor Company's (FoMoco') Total Performance era, and more specifically Carroll Shelby, and the modern day incarnation being the aforementioned Saleen, I first learned about Saleen's Mustang's in the early 1990's.

As it became a yearly Summer tradition for Mwah, especially when ensconced in WASSAC', nee Washington Shelby Automobile Club, where I first got this writing bug... To attend the Mustang Roundup at Bellevue Community College, (BCC) where I stood in line and got Steve's autograph on that year's Saleen poster multiple times.

As the Saleen company has apparently gone thru its High's 'N lows, but is now once again under Steve's tutelage, as part of his latest venture SMS Supercars, with currently three BAD ARSE modern day Muscle cars on offer, the S302 Mustang, Black Label, S570 Challenger and S620 Camaro. Along with the electric GTX, apparently based upon a Tesla model.

As it was nice to have been invited to the Saleen Mustang commemorative models Washington unveil this summer at Evergreen Ford Me Thinks, which unfortunately I couldn't attend. As even think the notice in the No Fenders Mailbox said that Desire Wilson would be Thar?

Whilst Saleen's motto certainly is true: "Power in The Hands of A Few;" Beep-Beep!

Keep It Lit, Steve!