Friday, May 18, 2018

MOTO GP: An Interesting Dilemma

(Image source:

This is Suzuki, this is Yamaha. Suzuki or Yamaha. One lump or Two?
 Yeah, I know my timing's impeccable... Especially since Y'all are probably Hankerin' for some finely "tuned 'N Jetted" story revolving round "Fast Friday," or who'll be putting Thar Fire Breathin' Dallara UAK-18 on Pole at Mother Speedway, Eh?

But that's not how I roll upon thou Isle 'O Nofendersville, which you're painfully aware of if you read these Award Winning No Fenders pages regularly...

Instead, I enjoyed an article posted on my newest Racing Website I visit, named For which the article was in regards to the Dilemma one of the Privateer Squads was currently enjoying. Having to debate over which Motorcycle Manufacturer to take up Satellite status with.

After all, not only have Two Wheelers raced at Mother Speedway, but were actually the Brickyard's first track contestants after the Balloon race...

As may be it's a STIR-RETCH? But I found the quandary of choosing a Scooter' supplier loosely akin to Open Wheel Racing teams having to choose what engine supplier to align with, provided they're granted the option of choosing.

Since there was an immense amount of Politicking in order to grant McLaren's desires to ditch their Hondre' lumps; Err PU's in Formula 1. For which it now seems that the Honda Power Units potentially aren't as Bad as they've been Blamed for lately. Especially during that stellar weekend's outing at Bahrain!

And it'll be interesting to see if the B-I-G BULLZ', nee Red Bull Racing chooses Honda over le Reggie' (Renault) for 2019?

Thus imagine if Indy Cars can finally woo somebody into becoming the third engine supplier for its series, sometime in 2021? Since I think the year 2020's out, since typically manufacturers like to have a two year lead time, Me Thinks?

As I'd enjoy seeing Alfa Romeo being the Brand to do so, although I think their Commander-in-Chief Sergio Marchionne is more focused upon the Glitz 'O Formula 1? Although I'd suggest that the Indy 500's nothing to sneeze at...

While Alfa could build upon its IndyCar Heritage, even if the previous Championship Auto Racing Teams (CART) endeavour wasn't successful. How could you not enjoy "Mr. Spin 'N Win," nee 'Ol Hollywood', aka Danny Sullivan pedalin' an Alfetti at the Brickyard...

As certainly there's room upon the IndyCar Grid for a third engine supplier, which would presumably Bump the series entry list above the current 23-24 competitors. Not to mention relieving Chevrolet and Honda from their current Heavy workload for the Month of May!

Since I think the Bowtie's currently supplying 19 and Honda 17 Indianapolis 500 entries respectively. Which surely doesn't include spares or engines in the vernacular of 'Ol Hobbo', aka David Hobbs have Done Blown Up!

And if a third engine supplier was enticed to participate in Indy Cars, would we revert back to the Top Bananas, i.e.; Penske, Ganassi and Andretti once again becoming "Anchor Teams," a la "Works" or Factory Teams. Which occurred during the 2012 season when you wanted to be anything but "Powered-by-Lotus!"

As we remember the Maelstrom over the 'lil Minnows who couldn't get Thar Mitts upon either of the preferred Chevy's or Honda's, when I pontificated for Hondre' to do the right thing' and give Sarah Fisher Racing an engine!

whilst others not so lucky were forced to campaign the Judd designed and badged Loti's, which quickly earned the moniker Luddis' & Slowotuses'; YOUCH!

Obviously I've got ZERO Clue if this will happen or not? Even though we hear from time to time that the Heavy Breathers at Hulman & Co. are in discussion with potential third or even fourth party engine suppliers...

And now that China's Geely Group's taken control of Lotus, and has big Plans for turning Lotus into a Star Brand, why couldn't they Dust Off the Judd IndyCar engine design, tweak it to perform better and Wallah! Once again see Lotus racing at the Speedway?

But then again, would that mean we'd have to put up with seeing that I just Swallowed a Canary Toothy Grin of Kevin "Smiley Face" Kalkoven's on the Indianapolis Motor Speedway's Grid?

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Le Mans and WEC Super Season Moving to New TV Network

But Good luck Seeing I-T!

Ah, the Dominoes Uh Keep Falling, as now Sports Car racing is moving to a new Television Home Stateside, for those of us who can actually watch it! Since although it's not as pathetic as MotoGP moving to beIn' Sports, it's still on a somewhat obscure Network. With Racer's Marshall Pruett noting it's in a somewhat paltry 73 million U.S. Homes. Which by my Ryth-Muh-Tickin' is just a skosh over 61.6%.

With the Nielsen Ratings company claiming Thars' currently 118.4 million U.S. Houses with Television sets, while the U.S. Population was 323.13 million in 2016...

While hopefully it'll be better than Liberty Media's Regurgitated Sky Sports Formula 1 coverage, since Velocity's using the same Business Model, and will simply "Pipe-in" Eurosport's TV Feed.

But HELL! If my Over Inflated, Money Grubbin' comca$t Cable TV Service Provider cannot even offer me (Fox Sports) FS-2. Then Thars' probably NO way in Bloody Hell we'll get the Velocity Channel in time for Le Mans! Since it AIN'T on my current Channel lineup.

So I'll just listen to the race via Radio Le Mans and the always enjoyable tones of 'Der Heindenmeir',aka John Hindhaugh instead!

As it sure would be nice  if comca$t at least offered a Motorsports Channels Package, Eh? Although I shudder to think how much more they'd need to Rip Us Off in order to do this...

Monday, May 14, 2018

Maximum Attack...

Max Verstappen sits on a Kerb after Crashing Out of Friday's first Free Practice Session in Baku. An Ominous sign of things to Come later that weekend in Azerbaijan. (Image source:
As Defending Indy 500 winner and former Formula 1 Pilote' Takuma Sato says: "No Attack, No Chance!"

For Mwah, it's very Funny how much Hot Air has been Blown about over Max Verstappen's Driving Style. Since what's been ringing in my Head ever since first hearing this Noise! Is the late Ayrton Senna's poignant Quote - something like: "As A Racing Driver, if you see a Gap and Don't G-O For It, then you're NO longer a Racing Driver!"

As I'll admit, originally I wasn't a Fan of Max Dutchboy' Verstappen, instead enjoying calling him by his other nickname, "The Brat!" Which No Fenders F1 Spotter Jeannie coifed him, upon his arrival to Formula 1.

Yet sometime late last season, I suddenly found myself enjoying Max's exuberance, not to mention his superb Driving Talent. Presumably this occurred sometime round him notching his third Formula 1 Victory in Mexico City, Ci?

Although I'm way more a Gynormous Fan of Daniel Ricky' Ricciardo's, and always have been. Way before his most Awesome performance en route to an improbable victory at Shanghai!

Nope, I'd say I latched onto the Smiling Aussie' Wayback in 2014, when he thoroughly Kicked 'lil Sid Viddle's (Seb Vettel) ARSE at Red Bull!

alas, I'll probably always be more a Fan of Ricciardo's than Verstappen's, but I now fine myself rootin' for either of these B-I-G BULLZ' Boys to Kick Golden Child's (Hamilton) and Vettel's Heinys!

As the Junior Verstappen reminds me of another Brash, Controversial Hard Chargin' multi-crashin' IndyCar Driver whom El Capitano', nee Roger Penske reputedly flirted with Firing before he won his first race a Quarter of a Century ago at Long Beach.

As he's got many nicknames, but this one should give it away, Can Y'all Say Mr. Chrome Horn? As the former IndyCar Driver I'm talking 'bout is named Paul Tracy.

As what's that 'Ol Racin' Adage 'bout rather having a Fast 'N Speedy Driver you need to Slow Down. Rather than just a plain 'Ol SLOW Driver needing to Speed Up...

Naturally, I'd scribble the above sentiments prior to watching the Sunday evening's Encore Presentation of the Azerbaijan Grand Prix...

Where I'll skip lamenting too much over ESPN2's, le Douche' Butchery of the race! As the Condescending Female's voice Thanking me for my Stupidity 'O Watching their Horrendously Sliced 'N Diced Production would return exactly where it had left off after the Commercial Break; BULLSHIT Sister!

As they went to Break right in mid-sentence of Thar Pitlane Pundit; Uhm, Reporter? Theodore, Not Lenny Krabitz' asking Saint Christian (Horner) for his take upon his two Red Bull Charges (Drivers) having just Crashed each other Out!

For which when we came back from an agonizingly long Commercial Break, the interview was over and Sky Sports had moved on; Crickets?

Thus it all came Flooding Back over what rubs me wrong about a new nickname for the Dutch Sensation, i.e.; "Max for Crashing;" YOUCH! Since that makes me think of the past Crashmeister Pastor Maldonado; YIKES! Although I'd say Verstappen's way more talented.

So I can live with his petulance over the In-car Radio, even if it makes him sound like a Spoiled Brat! Which is surely why they're played for us.  But I cannot overlook Max's affinity for making Double Moves to Block Opponents, for which he's now got a well documented History of.

As Verstappen makes me think of his Red Bull Predecessor in more ways than one, 'lil Sid Viddle, nee Sebastian Vettel, whom I find to currently be the Biggest Arsehole on the Formula 1 Grid! Followed extremely closely by Lewis "golden Child" Hamilton.

Whilst his Squeeze Job on Danny Rick' makes me think of Herr Skewmacher's blatant pinching Rubino' (Barrichello) along the Pitlane Wall!

Thus I applaud "Danny Ric's" masterful set-up and overtaking abilities, for which he was forced to try a second, third or was it fourth? To Overtake Verstappen, who once again moved twice, which is a blatant Disrespect for the  Rules!

And if nothing else, than at least Ricciardo gave his younger team-mate a pretty Damn Good message when the pair collided, by showing he's NOT gonna put up with Max's Act! Even if they Broke the Golden Rule of Motor Racing. Do NOT Take Out your Team-mate!

"Meanwhile, immediately following the race, Mercedes chairman Niki Lauda said Verstappen was 70 per cent at fault."

"It was the latest high-profile example of the 20-year-old Dutchman’s aggression, and five-time grand prix winner John Watson, who had a distinguished career in the Seventies and Eighties, placed the blame squarely at Verstappen’s feet.
Watson told Sportsmail: ‘Red Bull have created a monster. After signing him up on a multi-million bucks deal, he thinks he is undisputed No 1. Actually, the way he races is as if he’s still in F3.
‘If I ran the team, I’d swap him with Pierre Gasly, put him back in Toro Rosso (Red Bull’s junior team for whom Gasly drives), to learn how to be a grand prix driver. Until he realizes that driving as recklessly as he does serves nobody, he is just going to be a dangerous hot-rod.
‘To think smart, not fast, is beyond him. Over four weekends so far he has screwed up each time. They’ve created a monster and it is difficult to control it now."

Whilst I've got NO Clue on whether or not I'd catch leDouche's  Sky Sports Spanish GP Chop-fest prior to the race. Or how would the Red Bull Pair get on in Barcelona? Like would they play nicely with each other? And when will Verstappen's weaving antics lead to a really big, Horrendous, Harmful & Nasty Shunt?