FOX in The Hen House

Y’all knew that one was Ah-Comin’, didn’t Yuhs? Now where’s Foghorn Leghorn, I Say, I Say?

 

First ‘n Foremost, suppose I should remind Y’all that I’m apparently a card carrying member of les Miserables, Wee-Wee…

 

As its old news now that the FOX Corporation has acquired one third ownership in Penske Entertainment, i.e.; IndyCar, the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and IMS Productions.

 

And that FOX is excited to bring Innovation to IndyCar’s, Supercharge its potential, Make its Drivers and IndyCar Household names, along with telling us great stories about the Sport All year round…

 

As some of that’s true. And let’s just same some I’ve Embellished upon…

 

Overall, I’m really not sure what to make about this surprising development that “Dropped” on Thursday, July 31st.

 

funniest bit in the press release is the quote from El Capitano’, nee Roger Penske or simply RP’. About the long-standing trust and shared vision for the future in this partnership with FOX is perplexing to Mwah…

 

Hang on uno momento, how do you have long-standing trust with a company; Err Corporation you haven’t even been working with for one year?

 

But now they’re tied at the Hip and FOX will be helping to guarantee energizing IndyCar’s future, Spew! Can Y’all say Rucky Dawgs’ and Checkers or Wreckers, Yeehaw! Or Playoffs and All Star race?

 

Why not incorporate ‘Ol Uncle Bernaughty’s desire for sprinklers on-track at F1 circuits? Or scheduling races during the afternoon’s Monsoons, eh?

 

As FOX started off this new relationship swimmingly Y’all! As I’d had no clue what the “Programming” Delay was during the Portland IndyCar race, when the start was delayed 15mins.

 

Having subsequently learned via David Land that many Folks in TV Land were rightly peeved with FOX! Having bumped IndyCar over to FS1 as the Live Golf match went long, Four!

 

Along with some local FOX Affiliates dropping the race entirely. Most notably Chicago, where David Malukas and Dale Coyne Racing Hail from. In favour of a Chicago Bears NFL Pre-season game instead! Uhm, let that sink in Y’all, BARF!

 

Along with FOX gaining a multi-year broadcasting rights extension, I doubt the season’s calendar will expand anytime soon, i.e.; begin sooner or end later, since FOX has the Day-Toner’ 500 and Football bookending IndyCar’s take it or leave it schedule…

 

Another entertaining part of this acquisition is how the whole FOX airing the entire season on Network TV was supposed to increase viewership; hopefully to one million viewers average outside the Indy 500 race. Yet FOX is actually averaging less than NBC did.

 

As FOX had its sixth consecutive broadcast of less than 800,000 viewers at Laguna Seca, and I couldn’t see how this trend doesn’t continue for the Portland broadcasts. Which it did, dropping from 734k to 708k viewers, whilst no idea how Milwaukee did?

 

Still not sure how FOX is going to “energize” IndyCar going forwards? Or how their metrics claim a 31% increased growth for year over year broadcasting?

 

On the positive side, selling a third of Penske Entertainment perceivably shores up its weakest link, i.e.; marketing and promotion of the series. But the other strange comment from FOX CEO Eric Shanks, which I heard on David Land’s Youtube Channel. Was about the potential for “Storytelling” of IndyCar year round, Say What?

 

How do you do that when your Hyper-energized racing series is Hibernating for Half the Freakin’ year? Having already begun its long winter’s slumber before Labour Day, Chirp-Chirp, Bueller?

 

What little I’ve read and listened via Podcast on FOX becoming a vested partner in IndyCar, tends to make me believe that Roger will never sell IMS. And wishes to keep in the “Family” for generations to come. And with a 66% controlling interest, that sounds feasible to Mwah for the time being. But who knows, Eh?

 

As I “See” this basically as a way for Roger to insert a “Poison Pill” into others trying to buy Penske Entertainment into the future, along with getting somebody to do the marketing work His team is Failing at currently…

 

Since as Marshall Pruett notes, FOX now has a vested interest financially to make the series grow, in order to please its Shareholders, and their bottom lines.

 

My only question is what happens if FOX decides its not going well and wishes to divest itself from IndyCar in the future? Although I’d guess there would be some sort of buyout clauses in their contract?

 

Now I’ve gotta go find my Coastal.com Tristan Turbo’ Vautier Cheap Sunglasses from Mother speedway, cause’ the Futures so Bright! 

IndyCar, Be Afraid! Its Football time again

“Johnny said you play a pretty good Fiddle, now let me show You How its done!” Hut-Hut, Arkansas!

 

Obviously, this No Fenders rant is pointless! But I felt like uncorking it anyways…

 

As two songs crystalized upon my internal Jukebox after that Oh, so clever title sprang to mind! Since none other than the late Larry McMurtry said He couldn’t write the book until He had a title for it…

 

Thus Wasted Days and Wasted nights first flashed upon my radar. But thinking more about the fearful 869lbs Gorr-rillia’ that IndyCar’s so scared to go up against. Instead Charlie Daniels Devil Went Down to Georgia seemed more Apropos. Since after all, think Georgia’s Football country, Y’all?

 

Having said it before, I’ll stand firm on my conviction that IndyCar sold its Soul to FOX for its latest TV Broadcast deal. For which the crammed down our gullet July portion of the calendar saw FOX only average 734,000 viewers for the Toronto IndyCar race. Last seen on Terrestrial TV Wayback’ in gory 2019, when the NBC Sports Broadcast netted a stark 504,000 viewers. Before NBC showed Oh Canada the love yearly, by making Toronto its only Peacock streaming race of the season.

 

As the hoped for silver bullet of inking FOX as the new television partner, was that the network FOX TV Broadcasts would result in a viewer ratings surge to above the magic One million viewer threshold weekly, Which we know didn’t happen.

 

As Toronto was FOX’s fifth  consecutive race during summer without an audience over 800k. Netting FOX eighth races under 800k, albeit four races above One million viewers.

 

Arse-suming Laguna Seca kept FOX’s streak of under 800,000 viewers going…

 

Average FOX Broadcast equals 829,000+ to date, through 12 races, not including this year’s Indianapolis 500. Compared to NBC’s 38 (2019-2024) non-conflicting races vs. NASCAR, the Indy 500, weather delays, NFL or COVID-19 season averaged 998k plus. Which drops to 935,408 for races going up against opening weeks of NFL. football.

 

While NBC’s six non-conflict telecasts last year averaged 932,833 to FOX’s 829,833 = Over 100k less FOX viewers to date! Which I’d say will not improve with the doldrums, Err Dog Dazes ‘O August fast approaching. Uhm, where’d they go Vern?

 

NBC’s 2024 tally dips to an average of 868k plus when factoring in last year’s Nashville finale vs. Week 2 of NFL Football, Urgh! Which was still approx. 40k higher than FOX’s tally through Toronto…

 

Look, I get it, which doesn’t mean I have to like it! That we’ll never go back to IndyCar’s Heyday’s of CART. Which for example the 1990 CART PPG IndyCar World Series also featured 17 races. Beginning on April 8th at Phoenix International Raceway. And ending on October 21st at Laguna Seca Raceway, with effectively a Double Header. Due to the Marlboro Challenge race running on Saturday.

 

With two new races added that year, both being street races at Denver and Vancouver, with Pocono being dropped due to safety concerns.

 

Although 30 years ago, the IndyCar season began another 17 race calendar on March 5th at Miami’s Bicentennial Park. And concluded the season on September 10th at Laguna Seca. With seven street races, six Ovals and four road course races.

 

Hmm, don’t Y’all just love when history gets in the way of your rant? As perhaps this six months on/off thingy’ Aint’ so new, Eh?

 

Yet IndyCar is never going to improve their ratings until they figure out how to improve the schedule away from its yearly Famine-Feast-Famine routine. As everyone knows All about the ridiculous six month Hibernation. Followed by two or three races with three week gaps between them, Blah-blah-Blah. For which I’d say the 1995 calendar was way more “balanced” and flowing nicely, without any momentum killing gaps upon it.

 

Then slamming half of the season between May to June. A weekend off and then another five races over four July weekends, before limping to the finale on August 31st, Crickets! Is never going to grow your desired audience…

 

And let’s not even get started on one of IndyCar’s worst Buzzwords. Can Y’all say Date Equity? With it being time to play Wackamole again…

 

I also  understand we cannot compare IndyCar to NASCAR or Groan, Formula 1, who’s sweeping the nation with it Real Housewives of F1 reality TV Show. Be still my bleeding Heart. What will they do with the demise of Chris Horner, eh?

 

But its funny how IMSA’s still got a few races left on their calendar, i.e.; Battle on The Bricks (Sept 21st) and Petit Le Mans. (Oct 11^th) While the NHRA’s still racing until November 16th at Pomona, the conclusion of its 20 race season. Even with the litany of Pigskins being tossed round, Illegal Formation – tweet!

 

As believe it or not? Thars’ some of us who only follow Motorsports. Meaning its good to have other racing series to follow in IndyCar’s absence. Especially since IndyCar has gone into its winter’s slumber, and won’t see its shadow for another Freakin’ six months, Sigh!

 

As what’s that ‘Ol saying about Out of sight, Out of mind! Which ironically, Davey Hamilton said the very same thing during the Laguna Seca race, regarding the shortness of the IndyCar season…

 

(TV Ratings Source: Indianapolis Star, Nathan Browne)

HYDROS: The 2025 Season Spools up in Earnest

Although a fifth’s of Thar season’s already over. And I feel like I need a fifth after a most disjointed weekend of trying to follow along…

 

This coming fourth ‘O July weekend sees the H1 Unlimited series contesting Thar’ second race of the 2025 season at Madison, Indiana

 

The season began nearly one month ago at the Guntersville Hydrofest, June 8th on Lake Guntersville, Alabama. With the remainder of the five events as follows: July 6th Madison Regatta at Madison, Indiana.

 

Then a three race west coast swing, including the traditional Warshington’ back-to-back “Double”, i.e.; July 27th Tri-Cities Water Follies at Kennewick on the Mighty Columbia, nee Columbia River.

 

Followed a week later on Lake Washington  August 3rd at Seattle’s Seafair, presumably replete with the legendous’ Blue Angels, unless somebody’s spent too much upon His 79th birthday’s military parade and had to cut their funding?

 

The season concludes on September 14th at Bayfair’s Mission Bay, with the Bill Muncey Cup in San Diego, CA.

 

This year’s Tri-Cities Water Follies commemorates the 60th anniversary of this event and will host this year’s prestigious APBA Gold Cup race. With the Gold Cup being the oldest American trophy, beginning with it’s 1904 inaugural event

 

Like every offseason, much movement has occurred in the top Dawgs’ Unlimited Hydroplanes fleet. As Dustin Echols has decided to retire from competition, leaving the U-40 devoid of a driver.

 

And with Sharon and Kelly Stockton, longtime owners of Bucket List Racing and the U-40’s main sponsor Flav-R-Pac moving onto the U-11’s flanks as its new primary sponsor, Y’all have to wonder the status of the U-40 Bucket List Racing Unlimited Hydroplane this season.

 

Once again, the H1 Unlimited website has suffered another compressor stall, since I couldn’t find anything on its apathetic website about the seismic shift of the competing teams landscape…

 

According to the Madison Courier, Miss Madison Racing which had gotten itself into hefty financial debt due to it’s 2018 sponsorship agreement with Home Street Bank. With the former Miss Budweiser Tukwila race shop becoming an albatross around its neck due to the hefty mortgage, has led to Miss Madison president Charlie Grooms selling the entire assets of the championship winning team! Having just won their twelfth championship last year…

Seattle’s Bruce Ratchford, the founder and proprietor of Apollo Mechanical, who not only became Seafair’s title sponsor last year. When the Apollo Mechanical Cup joined Seafair for its 75th anniversary.  Also sponsored the U-27 Miss Apollo last season. With the newly created race team stepping up with the acquisition of Miss Madison Racing’s two Unlimited Hydroplane Hulls. Along with adding the U-27 to its fleet.

 

Thus, defending APBA National High Points Drivers Champion Andrew Tate has become teammate this season with Dave Villwock. With Tate in the U-91 Miss Goodman Real Estate and Dave Villwock in the U-27 Miss Apollo for the new BWR Racing team, forming a new powerhouse race team to challenge Strong Racing…

 

Initially, I Arse-sumed BWR Racing would be run out of the former Miss Madison Tukwila race shop. Although re-reading the Madison Courier story, it notes that the entire Tukwila inventory was sold, making me wonder if the building wasn’t included?

 

As Grooms and four other Board members of Miss Madison Racing Inc have been fired over this travesty, with the immediate future of the team unknown.

 

Yet H1 Unlimited blissfully reported in February, that Miss Madison racing Inc had sold one of it’s Hulls to eric Christensen over the winter. Who’ll compete aboard the U-2 this season, driving for His newly founded Christensen Racing team. Making me wonder just how many Hulls did Miss Madison Racing own?

 

Christensen clamed they’d have the U-2 Fraternal Order of Eagles and Albert lee Appliance Hydroplane ready for May’s Spring training event on the Columbia River, but the race boat, based out of Buckley, WA didn’t appear at Guntersville. Making me wonder if this will just be another west coast partial season Hydroplane?

 

A la the U-21 Go Fast Turn Left Racing Hydroplane, that Gunnar O’Farrell dramatically flipped during testing in Pasco this May! Although the team’s confident they’ll be ready in time for the Water Follies event.

 

Meanwhile, following the sale of Miss Madison Racing’s assets to BWR Racing, the series notes that in conjunction with representatives of Marshall County Tourism and Sport, the Madison Regatta and Miss Madison Racing, the team will attempt competing in the season’s first two East coast races, i.e.; Guntersville and Madison.

 

Subsequently, Miss Madison Racing announced that rookie skipper Brandon Kennedy will be at the tiller of it’s U-6 Hydroplane, as the organization regroups and hopefully secures it’s long term future. AS I’d like to think the team can rebound and return to a full season campaign in the near future…

 

Cannot say I’m overly impressed by only six Unlimited Big Boyz’ Boats showing up at Guntersville, but think we’ve had worse. As I tend to recall some of the races having a paltry four Hulls. But with the cloud hanging over the storied Miss Madison operation right now, guess I should see this as a good thing overall.

 

Another interesting side note is that Bruce Ratchford has joined forces with Darrel Strong, owner of Strong Racing, the H1 Unlimited Hydroplane’s other two boat team owner in Hydrotown Racing Inc.

 

As Hydrotown Racing Inc was created in 2023 to promote and market the Unlimited Hydroplanes, while apparently APBA is the sport’s governing body thru its ABRA association.

 

Yet Hydrotown Racing’s got a long way to go towards marketing and promoting the sport properly! Especially if Guntersville is their media template for success…

 

Whilst opining for nine Unlimited Hydroplanes competing in the Gold Cup and Seafair this summer. I think the best will be eight Hulls, since the U-6 Miss Madison is slated to run just the first two races. Meaning it will be Strong Racing vs. BWR Racing this season jousting for the National High Points Championship titles. 

Trying to Follow IndyCar is a Hard Job!

Y’all know what’s Ah-comin’ Righto? Can You Hear Me Now Racer and IndyCar Radio Network?

 

In what seems to be a fitting nod to the now concluded “Month of May”, why would I have expected anything less?

 

On Monday, May 12th, Y’all may be aware of Racer launching it’s “New & Improved” website, which for Mwah, now no longer adequately works! As why would you do this two weeks before the biggest IndyCar race of the year, and the day before Indianapolis 500 practice began?

 

Being a Blind Motorsports Fan and having “read: Racer.com for the past dozen-plus years, which I rely on for my daily racing news. I utilize Zoomtext Fusion 2025 screen reading software to read the internet and All things electronic, i.e.; email, word, etc.

 

Thus,  I’m guessing whatever you’ve done in the coding of your new website isn’t compatible with my screen reader. As it now says button when I “click” on the IndyCar section, (for example) which never happened before.

 

And then after I have to play jump with whatever comes up next, needing to tab to get past whatever it is? All of the subject titles simply say Article page. And below that says Authors profile page for the entire current page, Huh?

 

The same issue occurs when I select the F1, IMSA, etc. “button”, meaning I have zero idea what Any of the articles on the entire website are about? And I really do not wish to spend my time playing guess what this mystery article is?

 

If this information is now a graphic? Then my screen reader would be unable to read it, for which I don’t think this should be done. And I have the exact same issues in either Microsoft Edge or Firefox/Mozilla web browsers, which once again makes me think it’s a coding issue.

 

Guessing I’m the only person having this issue? As all I know is that Racer’s previous website worked perfectly and “interfaced” with my screen reader. As something’s obviously happened! Since this is the only website on Ye Intrawoods I have this issue with, Urgh!

 

Then there’s the whole month’s issues of IndyCar Radio and IndyCar Radio Network’s pathetic sound quality, which I tired of quickly and didn’t bother venting my frustrations previously, since after all, it’s the world’s greatest racetrack. Uhm what is it? Speak Up sonny! Did Yuhs say something about a Firetruck?

 

The horrible sound quality issues began with the IndyCar tune-up race on the road course during Mothers Day weekend. As not only was the “Stereo” sounds quality strange, like inside of a tin can. You also could never hear what the pit reporters were saying when talking to a driver. But you could hear them talking over the intercom completely, i.e.; Rob Blackman saying I’ll go talk to Ferrucci, etc. Not to mention the Booth Boys cracking jokes during the commercial breaks, with Nicky Salt’ Yeoman enjoying Davey Hamilton’s One-liner…

 

This same, pathetic and annoying turn up, down rinse, lather, repeat volume issue persisted throughout Indianapolis 500 practice, whenever I did try bothering to tune-in. Although thankfully I was busy the first two-plus days. And then I just turned off IndyCar Radio during Fast Friday since this was so G-Damn Annoying! As you’d think they’d have been able to fix this by Fast Friday, El Correctomundo?

 

Huh, what did you say Alex Wolff? Oh, what’s that Firetruck doing in Gasoline Alley? You did say Firetruck, Eh?

 

Resorted to my old “trick” of listening to Indy 500 Qualifying upon The Fan’s 1070AM Tune In weblink, which was much better. But hey, if you thought FOX had too many Adverts’, (commercials) then Y’all better not listen to IndyCar via The Fan!

 

Also do not understand why The Fan needs to drop the IndyCar Radio Network coverage for three hours during the middle of Indy 500 qualifying? Since they just put on some B-Team instead, so I jumped back to Indycar.com’s strangled radio webcast instead before simply completely tuning out until 1PM Pacific when Mark Gravelly’ James and Zach Veach returned to the Airwaves…

 

Sunday’s final qualifying day’s coverage was much better on The Fan, which I only bothered beginning with during the Fast Twelve Shootout, so naturally was astounded over ScottyMac’, aka Scott McLauglin destroying His primary Yellow Submarine Speedway car during morning practice, Youza! Before the unbelievable Team Penske Attenuator Shenanigans…

 

Naturally, I thought the sound issue qualities would have been ironed out by Race Day, Stee-rike! Since just like the race itself unfolding into two parts. The radio broadcast sound issues persisted thru the entire first half of the race, as I repeatedly jumped back ‘n forth between IndyCar Radio and 1070AM The Fan with barely any improvement between either site, Groan! As I even tried tuning into IndyCar Radio Network’s newest member’s station KALL, in Salt Lake City Utah to no avail!

 

As it’s Uber annoying that Mark James never, ever mentions any West Coast radio stations, with the exception of Hawaii having been mentioned in the past. Whilst I couldn’t find a listing of IndyCar Radio Network affiliates…

 

So I just spent nearly the first half of the race constantly scooting up closer to my Confuzers Bitchin’ Soundbar speakers, along with jacking up and then back down after the turn announcers were yelling over the race cars sound modulation, Sigh!

 

And then just like the race “settled” down, suddenly The Fan’s sound quality improved immeasurably and I was able to listen the rest of the way without constantly adjusting the volume. With my only complaint being after the litany of Commercials run Ad Nauseum, Seriously? You had to go to another Freakin’ commercial break with twelve laps remaining, and not returning to the race until only eight laps to go, WTF!

 

Yeah, being Blind, I’m definitely a Card carrying member of les Miserables, Hya!

 

Now, stay tuned for the G-r-R-Reatest Spectacle in, Oh Never Mind… 

INDY 500: Penske to the Forefront Again

But for All the Wrong reasons!

 

So it’s the day before the Mack Daddy 109th running of the Indianapolis 500, and I just have to say that this year’s race has a bad taste in the mouth for Mwah…

 

After learning late Monday evening of Team Penske’s additional penalties handed out by J. Douglas Boles, all I could say was Horseshit! Wondering to thyself do I totally ignore Team Penske being caught cheating again, or do I try scribbling something constructive here upon No Fenders? Skipping the F-bombs’ laden initial response I had when learning about this…

 

Everyone knows about Penske’s No. 2 Josef Newgarden and No. 12 Will Power’s entries being sent to the last row, now starting P32-33 based upon Saturday’s qualifying speed. And that they’ve been given the final two pit selections, forfeited their qualifying points and handed a $100,000 fine per car. Along with Team Penske top two IndyCar lieutenant’s Tim Cindric and Ron Ruzewski being banned from taking further part in this year’s Indianapolis 500; for the second straight year, Boo-Hoo-Hoo!

 

I understand Boles decision of keeping the fastest 33 cars in the field, but I also believe what Pato O’Ward said. Claiming that the cars were in their altered configuration on Saturday, for which we’ll never truly know…

 

But I say that IndyCar’s penalty wasn’t harsh enough. As the only message that can truly be sent about altering a safety component on a racecar, however slight is simply for immediate Disqualification. End of Story!

 

As the IndyCar statement claims that the Attenuator’s seams were filled in order to gain an aerodynamic advantage, which regardless of whom you believe, is just another of the countless examples of Penske seeking it’s legendous “Unfair Advantage!”

 

My “gut” feeling is that as long as Roger Penske holds the keys to everything. Sadly, there will forever be a dark cloud overhead IndyCar! Which I really don’t know the solution to, but I’d say it’s quite the conundrum.

 

Since once again one of the little teams is taking it in the shorts financially, whilst the Big Dawgs’ keep rollin’ on! As how much did Dale Coyne just lose out upon?

 

As the spotlight should have been solely focused upon the incredible accomplishment of rookie Robert Shwartzman, which was Freakin’ Amazing! With only five IndyCar races to His (and Prema’s) credit, He becomes just the third rookie in Indy 500 History to win pole!

 

The last being Italian Teo Fabi in 1983, the year Prema was formed. And first rookie team since the “Gasman” Tom Sneva driving for Mayer Motor Racing in ’84.

 

Totally Unbelievable!

 

Yet lie Pato O’Ward said in the IndyStar article I listened to late Sunday night, following the Fast Twelve Shootout. The real question is why does Penske feel they need to do such things? As they’ve got really good drivers, good equipment,  so why?

 

And who will Roger put on Double Secret Probation this time? Uhm, guess that Doug Boles did that for Him, Eh?

 

Although I’d like to point out what at least I heard Boles say during His press conference announcing the harsher penalty. The Nos. 2 and 12 weren’t disqualified, Team Penske simply elected to withdraw them on Sunday. As they were allowed to run in the Fast 12 Shootout but most certainly would be disqualified afterwards for failing post technical inspection.

 

While I still do not believe Cindric’s comment about ScottyMac’s No. 3 car not having a modified attenuator. Unless that means that Team Penske made the modification between McLaughlin’s practice crash and Sunday qualifying? Even though reports claim that other teams have photographs of Penske’s car running with this modification going back to last year, Huh?

 

As it’s a really Ugly problem! And no matter how it was handled/not handled? Somebody in the Last Row shootout got screwed! Especially when it’s the series owner caught cheating at the racetrack He owns!

 

As congratulations to Robert Shwartzman and Prema Racing! And may somebody beside Team Penske win this Sunday! Since can you imagine the scuttlebutt if either the No. 2 or No. 12 wins?

 

Aftermath

Naturally, the story wasn’t finished. Since a day after I finished penning this article, Roger Penske dropped a Bombshell with the firing of Tim Cindric, Rob Ruzewski and Kyle Moyer, His top three IndyCar lieutenants on Wednesday, May 21st.

 

This is quite significant, since I like many believed that Cindric would one day take over control of Team Penske when El Capitano’, nee Roger Penske had finally taken the chequered flag…

 

I should also say that I’ve found Doug Boles to be very pragmatic during this whole ugly situation, and as a lawyer saying He’s just been working with the facts. As Boles has been decisive and straightforward in what appropriate punishment He could deal out. Thus I find myself unexpectedly defending Him, by just saying that He’s only been president of IndyCar since early February. And as Boles said, the Penske penalitespenalties are probably Harsher then what was handed out to other team violations at the Thermal club this past March…

 

I also know that whilst photographic evidence of Josef Newgarden’s 2024 Indy 500 winning car sporting the exact same alterations exist. Boles has noted that He’s been told the Aerodynamic modification would net 0.0mph gain.

 

While it’s also somewhat hard to believe that Roger Penske would wish such negative publicity focused upon Him at the racetrack He so cherishes, and has spent millions improving to make “Penske Perfect”. Not to mention the huge stain this puts upon His legendous’ racing organization. Not to mention All of the people who work so diligently for Him…

 

Yet I still say that the only acceptable punishment for modifying a safety component. With the rear attenuator designed presumably with said seam gap to crumple in a rearwards accident and dissipate crash energy away from the driver, is for immediate Disqualification of said racecar!

 

While it will be very interesting to see how IndyCar moves forward from this massive scandal… 

Indy NXT returns to Action, in Earnest

But like it’s Big Brother IndyCar and Alex Palou. Can anybody stop Denis Hauger?

 

Yeah, your Humble, Haggard No Fenders scribe Tomaso’s another dollar short and several days late…

 

Have to say I agree with For the Love of Indy’s Raymond Hando over how exhausting the sheer volume of negativity surrounding IndyCar is, albeit much is self inflicted, unfortunately…

 

Case-in-point is the series yearly inability to smooth out it’s schedule and the Uber annoying three week breaks at season’s beginning, after we’ve waited another agonizing six month to go racing once again!

 

Yet think those three week gaps are annoying? Then think about how the Indy NXT competitors and it’s Fans feel over the totally ridiculous 63 Freakin Days gap between it’s St Pete season kickoff and round two last weekend at thee Barber’s, nee Barber Motorsports Park on May 4th, nine weeks later, Youza!

 

Naturally, much has happened since I last listened to an Indy NXT race, for which I “Drop-in” for the Alabama round., the first I’ve listened to since I Dunno, sometime last year.

Learning that Indiana native Kirk Dooley was named Director of Indy NXT by Firestone on April 7th, and will oversee all operations and competition of the Feeder series.

 

Dooley previously served as IndyCar’s Chief of Staff between 2015-16. In in 2016, Dooley was named Director of Executive Operations for Indianapolis Motor Speedway. Leaving in 2020 to served as Chief Operating Officer of the Skip Barber racing schools.

 

Was ready to scribble all about Doce Femme Fatales in Indy NXT this year, before learning nearly one month after the fact that Sophia Floersch had ended Her Indy NXT campaign with HMD Motorsports, Huh?

 

As the 24yr old German driver reportedly had a misunderstanding with Her primary sponsor according to Racer’s Marshall Pruett and thus She and HMD Motorsports parted ways immediately, with no word on what Floersch will do next?

 

As Sophia qualified P17 and finished P12, two positions ahead of HMD Motorsports rookie Hailie Deegan. As Deegan makes Her transition to single seaters, with the Temecula, California native being known for Her Offroad and  NASCAR career. In ARCA, Trucks and Xfinity.

 

On a side note, learned earlier this season that Jace Denmark, who’s now racing for TJ Speed Motorsports in His third USF Pro 2000 campaign Has been signed as an HMD Motorsports development driver…

 

Norway’s Dennis Hauger claimed His first “Grand Salami”, Err Grand Slam on His rookie debut for Andretti Global. As Hauger is the first Indy NXT driver since Linus Lundqvist in 2021 to win on debut.

 

Hauger led wire-to-wire from pole, and set fastest lap. Along wit leading rookie Lochie Hughes in an Andretti Global 1-2 finish, ahead of Caio Collet, driving for HMD Motorsports.

 

Myles Rowe of Abel Motorsports with Force Indy tied His series best finish in fourth, with Salvador de Alba, also of Andretti global rounding out the top five.

 

HMD Motorsports signed Kirkland, WA native Evagoras Papasavvas to replace the departing Bryce Aron. With Aron moving onto Chip Ganassi Racing’s Indy NXT team for the remainder of the season as Jonathan Browne’s replacement.

 

While Hauger once again cruised home for His second win in dominating fashion, with a second wire-to-wire victory from pole. The story of the weekend was Papasavvas’s Indy NXT debut.

 

Papasavvas, who raced in USF2000 the past two years, initially had signed a partial season deal with HMD Motorsports. A three race deal beginning at Gateway and concluding at Mid-Ohio. Yet the HMD Motorsports reserve driver, who impressed during a Mid-Ohio test, was called-up as Aron’s replacement four round two.

 

Evagoras won His maiden USF2000 race at Mid-Ohio, His hometown track in 2023. Followed by a second win at Toronto and fourth in that year’s USF2000 Championship.

 

On debut at Barber Motorsports Park, Papasavvas qualified third, inherited second when Caio Collet had a throttle issue, and held off a menacing Lochie Hughes, Myles Rowe and Josh Pierson to finish Vice Champion, Err runner-up!

 

Hughes tried everything He could think of, with Rowe and Pierson nipping at His Heals, all to nought…

 

Indy NXT contests a Double Header outing on Indianapolis’s road course this Friday-Saturday.

 

While can anybody catch the red-hot Hauger? Who’s two back-to-back wins on debut matches Ed Jones start to His 2015 Indy Lights season. As Jones would win the first three races in-a-row before finishing third overall behind Spencer Pigot and Jack Harvey… 

Another lost weekend of Shouting

As Are, You, Excited Now? Speak up you frothing Announcers…

 

Hmm, why did that title make me immediately think of an ‘Ol Rush song titled Between the Wheels, and the words Another Wasteland, Eh? Although it’s actually “another War, Another Wasteland and Another Lost Generation”, Righto Geddy…

 

“To live between the Wars in our time

Living in real time

Living in Good times

Holding on to Yesterdays,

 

You know how that Rabbit feels

Going under your speeding wheels

Wheels can cut you down

But the Wheels of time

Just pass you by”

 

 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cj1eUnNOvpY

 

Spent the entire weekend of April 11-13 consuming four separate motor racing series, i.e.; IndyCar, IMSA, formula 1 and MotoGP, Gulp! With my primary focus upon Indy Cars at The Beach’, ergo Long Beach. Along with the IMSA Sprint race which featured the return of Robert Wickens; beginning with Friday’s first IndyCar practice session.

 

Catching half of Saturday morning’s second IndyCar practice on (Fox Sports) FS1, as FS2 pulled Ye ‘Ol Switcheroo. Bumping the MotoGP Sprint race to that afternoon in favour of showing us more Bassmasters, Fish On!

 

Then IndyCar’s Qualie’ session capped off by the 140mins IMSA Sports Car “Sprint” race.

 

Next I “watched”, Err listened to the Bahrain Grand Prix Sunday morning, followed by the Long Beach Grand Prix and the nightcap being MotoGP’s delayed airing of the Qatar Grand Prix.

 

Now perhaps it’s just Mwah, but All of these races seemingly blurred into one long set of Boring motor races! Especially both F1 and MotoGP, the latter definitely not worth waiting until 9PM Pacific to watch, Urgh! As what did Raymond Hando say about late race start times ruining your day?

 

So, I didn’t catch the Australian Grand Prix, other than listening to the Highlights package. Being the most exciting of the season’s first four races, largely due to inclement weather, i.e.; passing rain shower…

 

Yet Formula 1 has largely been processional, even though I’m happy that Oscar Piastri has won twice from pole. Other than I hope He won’t get too swell-headed over thinking He can win the championship. As He’d be smart to ask His manager Mark Handlebarz’ Webber how that worked out Yas Isle 15 years ago!

 

Cannot say that IndyCar has been Uber exciting either, albeit at least there’s been passes for the win, even if Alex Palou won the first two races, followed by second place at Long Beach, where effectively Kyle Kirkwood led wire-to-wire from pole.

 

As it’s funny how at least the DW12 seems more capable of following other racecars and allowing for passing, but is this a biproduct of Firestone’s different rubber coumpounds?

 

Whilst Pirelli makes a range of different compound tyres for Formula 1, the choice of five various compounds in this range seems to be too small for meaningful tyre performance drop-off. As just consider how many drivers ran a one stop race at Shanghai…

 

As it’s even more funny how the current F1 chassis regulations introduced in 2022 were specifically designed to allow for the trailing car to run closer behind and encourage passing! Yet the ten F1 Constructors designs has seemingly converged to the point that this is no longer applicable.

 

Making a Farce of Formula 1 further, is the FIA instituting a mandatory second tyre stop at Monaco this year, to artificially induce some passing upon the narrow streets of Ye Principality, where overtaking is nye impossible…

 

Meanwhile, Team Penske and it’s factory Porsche 963’s have been untouchable. With the team’s No. 7 entry having won the first three races, Yawn! As don’t know if Long Beach was their second 1-2 finish?

 

Whilst Ye Pinball Wizard’, aka Marc Marquez returned to His domineering, winning ways in Qatar. Claiming His fourth, consecutive pole, along with four consecutive Sprint races on the trot. Plus His third Grand Prix win in Doha, Yawn!

 

Oops, what about the Shouting you might be saying? As I just don’t understand why the various TV Announcers think they need to Shout at us to get excited?

 

Although I did tune-in to my very first dosage of the new FOX TV announce lineup. For which I must say, Will Buxton seemed completely, totally out of place!

 

While Jack Harvey didn’t seem “Stiff” to Mwah, just think it’s His dry, British accent coming across…

 

As my favourite Announce Duo of the weekend was IMSA Radio’s John Heindhaugh and Ryan Marin during the Long Beach Sprint race. As Marin manages to interject enthusiasm without shouting or screaming. And Heindhaugh’s always entertaining.

 

Whilst the King of Screamers Kroftie’, aka Sky sports f1 lead Pundit David Kroft was doing His usual bit to keep me awake thru another boring F1 race!

 

And I don’t wanna say that the Long Beach IndyCar race was boring, But! Even Mark Gravelly’ James didn’t bother shouting euphorically over Kirk Kirwood winning, which speaks volumes to Mwah.

 

Yeah, it’s gonna be a Gory long, Hard season of motor racing, if this it what will typically transpire the rest of the year, outside that ‘lil ‘Ol Oval track at 16th and Georgetown. Provided we Don’t have more multiple faux Red Flag stoppages, or some Golf game on Thy Telie!

 

Then again, I suppose a boring race weekend is better than NO racing at all, Eh?

 

Partial song lyrics from: Between the Wheels by Rush. From their 1984 Album Grace Under Pressure. 

Think You’re Having A Bad Day?

As perhaps I should have chosen U2’s Sunday, Bloody Sunday instead?

 

Naturally, Y’all can figure out why that ‘Ol “Tell Me why I Don’t like Mondays” song I Don’t like Mondays by the Boomtown Rats springs to mind here, Righto?

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yteMugRAc0

 

As I realize it’s what He gets paid millions of dollars, Euros whatever to do for a living, but you’ve still got to feel for thee Martinator’s Nightmarish year! And how much things would be going differently if not romping on that cold Michelin tyre at Sepang during pre-season testing Wayback’ in February…

 

Thus we know that Jorge Martin crashed heavily and broke His hand and fractured a foot during that test outing. Requiring surgery to His right hand to place a screw in a metacarpal. While His left foot was left to heel on it’s own.

 

Then on the Monday preceding the season opener Thailand MotoGP race, Martin injured Himself again in a training accident. Suffering multiple fractures to His left hand, including the thumb carpal! Needing further surgery to repair His broken wrist…

 

Martin ultimately missed the first three rounds at Thailand, Argentina and Circuit Of the Americas, (COTA) before making His Aprilia debut at Qatar.

 

Now I could play Monday morning Quarterback here, but that seems pointless. As All racing drivers and riders seemingly live under the mantra of you’re only as good as your last race. And you don’t want to be out of circulation too long, less being forgotten or replaced…

 

Yet with the amount of physical pain Jorge was enduring at Qatar, it now seems obvious He rushed His return to racing, before disaster struck once again the Hapless, reigning MotoGP World champion.

 

Arse-suming Y’all know that Martin lost control of His motorcycle during Sunday’s Grand Prix, with Fabio di Giannantonio directly behind Him. With the Italian rider having nowhere to go and striking the fallen Martin in the back on-track with His front wheel!

 

Jorge ultimately suffered eleven broken ribs and a collapsed lung! Staying in Hospital for several days with a chest tube to drain fluids from His lung cavity before being released. But having to wait for His lung to sufficiently heal, i.e.; one to three weeks before being cleared to fly home, due to the altitude’s pressure difference. Before further treatment, rest and recovery, all under the supervision of His phalanx of medical professionals, i.e. Doctors and Physio’ commencess…

 

Martin will obviously miss several more races, with scuttlebutt suggesting the Spaniard will be out of action a further three months, with test rider Lorenzo Savadori further deputizing at Jerez, and presumably afterwards.

 

Yeah, now I know Why I don’t like Mondays… 

F1: The Sting of Max

Ah, to “Float like A Butterfly”. Uhm, where’s’ Good ‘Ol George Foremen to Knock Yuhs Out!

 

After wading thru the pandemonium Ye Bloody Daily Mail rag was frothing about over thoust Axing of Liam Lawson. I have to say I mused to Thyself how la Scuderia must be most content to have the pressure taken off of them regarding their first ever double disqualification from a Grand Prix, eh? Although Ferrari will need to drastically improve at Suzuka, results-wise. Seriously, lagging behind Williams in the Constructors standings, Yikes!

 

Whilst I doubt I’ll ever be a fan of Max Blunderhead’s, nee Naximilian Verstappen. You cannot underestimate His driving prowess. As last year’s Sao Paolo Grand Prix still clearly stands out as His best drive to me.

 

Not to mention the immense amount ‘O pressure the Dutchman relieved for Red Bull by winning from pole on Sunday…

 

No, what peeves me off is the Free pass the Hierarchy at Red Bull Racing seemingly is getting somewhat, with it’s Mega’ Damage control spin job. Touting how this is being done to save Lawson’s future and for the good of the team, Bully!

 

Since I can no longer recall how long I’ve been scribbling here on No Fenders about der Helmut tossing out drivers like luke warm bathwater, Ja Volt! As how far back do we wish to go?

 

While the Pied Piper of F1 Chris Horner serenely states that they’re looking forward to Yuki Tsunoda’s vast wealth of experience to help sort out the troublesome RB21, Seriously? Hmm, why didn’t Horner and Dr. Helmut Marco see fit to put the Japanese driver in straight away? Or does the reported increase of Honda money have something to do with this change of heart?

 

As the names Scott Speed, Vitantonio Liuzzi and Sebastien Bourdais immediately spring to mind. While being reminded of Jaime Alguersuari, Jean-eric Vergne, Sebastian Buemi, etc.

 

Not to mention the harshness Nyck de Vries suffered during His ten race outing at Alphatauri. Before somebody named DannyRic’, aka Daniel Ricciardo replaced Him, and so it goes…

 

While it’s also been well documented over the fortunes of Maximus’ Hothead’s past Red Bull F1 teammates Pierre Gasly who was swapped mid-season for Alexander Albon. And then Albon being demoted to test and reserve driver in favour of Sergio Perez. All suffering crushing blows to their F1 careers as Verstappen’s teammate at the Big Bulls’ outfit since the Dutchman’s arrival in 2016.

 

Going back even further, it was also pointed out how Daniil Kvyat suffered a similar fate accompli as Lawson has. Although the Russian driver was at least given a full season before being demoted to Scuderia Toro Rosso in order to make way for Formula 1 Wunderkind Max Verstappen. While Gasly also suffered the same demotion before ultimately moving onto Alpine…

 

The saddest statement or indictment of Red Bull’s driver blunder is the fact that Lawson lasted only half as long as Japanese driver Yuji Ide did for Super aguri in 2006, Youza! Especially since I’d rate the 23yr old Kiwi’ Lawson as a far superior talent vs. Ide!

 

While to underscore the brilliance of Verstappen, to date Max has won 64 of Red Bull’s 123 victories, which I believe equates to over 50%! Not to mention His 41 pole positions equals more than one third of the team’s 104 to date. As Red Bull quickly approaches it’s 400th Grand Prix, a mere pittance vs. Ferrari’s All-time ledger of 1,100 and counting! Although Red Bull is only celebrating it’s 20th Anniversary in Formula 1 vs. Ferrari having raced since 1950.

 

While at least Marco’s willing to admit that Red Bull is missing the genious of Adrian Newey, as even Max says this year’s RB21 is a handful to drive!

 

Yet Tsunoda’s placement at Red Bull can surely only be seen as a stop-gap measure with Honda becoming Aston Martin’s Werks’ Power Unit (PU) supplier beginning next year. While Honda Racing Company president Koji Watanabe  has already confirmed that Honda’s funding of drivers at Red Bull will cease at year’s end. Thus presumably leaving the door open for either Lawson to return, or Isack Hadjar to join the roiling Hot driver barbeque at Red Bull.

 

But I’d say that Red Bull’s bigger problem is keeping Verstappen, since inevitably the Dutchman will either move to another F1 team or retire from the sport, leaving Red Bull in a vacuum! As Red Bull seemingly has nobody in it’s vaunted Junior Academy to emulate Max’s impressive winning tally for the Energy Drinks company…

 

As Grizzled F1 Journo’ Joe Saward notes, only two Red Bull Junior Academy drivers have won Grands Prix for Red Bull, i.e.; Sebastian Vettel and Daniel Ricciardo. With Pierre Gasly winning once for Scuderia AlphaTauri, whilst Vettel made history winning both Toro Rosso and Red Bull’s maiden Grand Prix victory, if I remember correctly?

 

Meanwhile one of Red Bull’s two Blowhard, as ironically Joe Saward noted being somewhere in Hornerwald prior to the latest Red Bull Messopotamia. Noted that it wouldn’t be surprising for Lawson to outqualify Tsunoda in the Racing bull, which is noted for being quick in Qualie’.

 

And talk about pressure, as Yuki will be under immense scrutiny by His Home Nation’s Fans…

 

As this gives Alpine’s rookie Jack Doohan a slight reprieve, making me think of the following scenario. Imagine that Williams had justdumpedCarlos Sainz Jr. who’s reportedly been struggling for pace in the FW47 after just two races in favour of Alpine/Williams reserve driver Franco Colapinto…

 

As the Box score will show that Tsunoda finished P12 at Suzuka, with Lawson P17. Although one race doesn’t make a very large sample size. And in fairness to Lawson, Yuki’s in His fifth full season having just made His 90th start in Japan. While Lawson has only raced two partial seasons as a replacement driver, having just capped His 14th start

 

 As Formula 1 is a brutal sport, perhaps even Blood Sport, Eh? As the $64k question now is how well does Lawson progress from this setback? Or will the Red Bull Hierarchy see fit to replace Lawson at season’s end?

 

While “Wouldn’t It be Ironic”, (Alanis) if Verstappen and Tsunoda became future teammates at Aston Martin…