Monday, January 24, 2011

F1: Paddock Notes – January 24th Edition

Otay, this is a little dated – especially since Y’all probably have heard this by now? As nothing much happened over the Christmas break, besides the announcements of two further driver signings, WHILE The Iceman threw down on F1 a ‘Wee bit after the Holiday break and lastly Seahawks Defensive Star Colin Cole announced his newest driver...

Virgin Inks Second Driver
Virgin announced the signing of Belgium’s Jérôme d'Ambrosio as its second race driver – alongside of The Glockster, nee Timo Glock.

Dambrosio (25-years old) replaces first year Virgin driver Lucas di Grassi, as apparently the Brazilian wasn’t cutting-the-mayonnaise, (clever Belgian French Fry joke, eh?) while Dambrosio will become the first Belgian to race in Formula 1 since the multi-country Bertrand Gachot raced for Pacific Grand Prix way back in 1995. Yet unfortunately Gachot is probably best known for his mustard gas attack upon a Taxicab driver...

Thus, when I think of Belgian Gran Primo Piloto’s - I most fondly think of Thierry Boutsen who I believe is the last to have won Grand Prix races, albeit Jacky Ickx wasn’t half bad either, eh?

”Scuderia Enstone” Keeps Rooskie
I haveda say that Willie Buxom’s (Will Buxton) Scuderia Enstone moniker for the Lotus team that wants to be Lotus, even though it used to be Renault, who wanna buy into Lotus; Oh Never Mind! What a load of rubbish, eh?

Thus the new Genii-Lotus-Reggie-Souper-Dooper X P califrocious Racing Team... Has announced the re-signing of Russian Grand Prix driver Vitaly Petrov to a further 2-year extension of his former contract... Hey! After all somebody’s gotta flip Ferdi-the-Putz the Byrd ‘N let Alonso know he’s Numero Uno; Hya!

Kimi says Rallying’s Better
The original ICEMAN, nee Kimi Räikkönen has claimed that World championship Rallying has made him a better driver since he won the Formula One World Championship...

Raikkonen: WRC has made me better driver

On a sad note, Kimi’s father Matti unexpectedly died just 2-days prior to Christmas at the early age of 56, as Kimi & the entire Räikkönen Family are still in mourning...

The Fastest Indian?
I THINK NOT! Although that’s apparently the Tagline being used to describe Hispania F1 Racing’s newest signee Narain Karthikeyan, who I’ve previously noted has taken over Karun “Cowboy” Chandhok’s HRT race seat – in order to most likely secure the teams immediate future.

Yet when I think of that Tagline – The Fastest Indian, I immediately think of Anthony Hopkins in the movie of the exact same title, about a certain motorcycle on the Bonneville Salt Flats; as ‘Juan O these Dazes I’m gonna get around to watchin’ it...

In the meantime, now comes word that Hispania has quit the Formula One Teams Association, (FOTA) claiming it no longer feels it has any significant value... While the FOTA has reported that HRT is delinquent upon payment of its 2010 membership fees...

CRIKEYS! Hope this doesn’t give Uncle Bernaughty the needed wedge to thwart the FOTA’s hoped for monetary increase for the fast approaching 2013 Concorde Agreement. As Messer Ecclestone has a long cherished reputation for paying teams to see his side of the picture and fight against the other Formula 1 Constructors for his benefit...