Friday, September 6, 2013

Silliness Abounds in Formula One

Just a few casual observations from one of Grizzled 'Journo Joe's 'legendous cadre 'O Cut 'N Paste Monkeys... Uhm, careful there Joe, as I believe that Monkey can be considered an offensive term on your side of the pond, eh?

Yet, I have been pissing myself silly lately, not to be 'Cornfuzed with Jay 'Pissinbootz Penske, but; Oh Never Mind! Its just that A-L-L of this Silly season talk 'bout where will Kimi go is starting to seem a bit tedious... As in I think it's all an elaborate sham to ensure that Kimi gets his untolds millions to stay put at Lotus next year. As perhaps this is all a convenient smoke screen for Uncle Bernaughty to escape the German prosecution spotlight while trying to ready the F1 stock exchange flotilla?

thus the two biggest names now being bantered about make NO sense of moving either, as in a one Fredrico Suave and 'JENSE, as in really? Fernando Alonso is gonna leave Scuderia Ferrari to be outshined by 'TWINKIEBOY (Seb Vettel) at Red Bull? Can Y'all say McLaren '07? As in the Ferdi 'N Louise show... (Fred Alonso v Lewis Hamilton...)

And now the latest cock-up, which I think is just a very wry way of Messer Whitmarsh paying back the media is his taunts of Kimi coming to McLaren and teaming with Button, which would see McLaren drop-kick 'Checka (Sergio Perez) to the kerb, really?

One you're gonna cut your ties to Carlos Slim's billions; WTF? And two, somehow I don't see how that would help Uncle Bernaughty's plans for returning to Mexico City, as it seems that Mexico will be keen a la Mother Russia is to have at least one countryman on the grid, preferably two Gran Primo Piloto's instead, which means I'd expect both Perez and Esteban Gutierrez  to retain their current F1 seats for next year.

Meanwhile we're set to most likely see at least  one 'Rooskie on the grid, as Sauber intends to have 18yr old rookie pay driver Sergey Sirotkin in its fold for 2014, whilst Vitaly 'VO5 Petrov is seeking his return too; hence, odds would suggest that thee Incredible Hulkster, nee Nico Hulkenberg would be the odd man out at Sauber, with no word on where Petrov would land...

Viva la Mexico
And speaking of Mexico, as I said above, it makes NO sense to jettison the Mexicali Piloto's when rumours suggest that Mexico's on the verge of returning to the F1 Calendar for 2014 at the Autodromo Hermanos Rodriguez circuit for 2014, perhaps being announced in a Fortnight? Although I'd expect it to be 2015 instead since I don't think the circuit has been updated to the usual Herman "Tilkie" (Tilke) constraints - and I called him 'Tilkie since that's what one of the organizers used to call him at the beginning of the Circuit Of the Americas inclusion into F1, as Y'all recall Tavo Hellmund, right?

Tiafosi to be  Disappointed Again?
Otay, I'll confess that I couldn't actually see the side-by-side onscreen still photos of the all conquering Red Bull RB9's 'Uber small wing settings it was carrying vs. the Ferrari F138's larger rear wing - which Professor (Steve) Matchett went to great lengths to illustrate for us, albeit he did mention how potentially Ferrari had been anticipating rain to arrive in the tail end of the race and set their  wing package accordingly?

But it was a different Matchett comment that makes me think that the Italian GP has already been won by Vettel, when Matchett pointed out how there was virtually NO wing when the slot gap was opened on the DRS (Drag Reduction system) which leads me to believe that the Red Bull can run with less wing than its competitors - which doesn't bode well for Monza which is the lowest Downforce circuit of the season... But  Hey! I'm still rootin' for either Fredrico Suave or thee young "Louise 'JAGUAR" Hamilton to upset Vettel's party!

  Mid-season Driver Rankings
Not exactly sure who the author is, and everybody seemed to be doing I-T during the Formula 1 Summer Holiday which thankfully is over, so sit back 'N check out one of the numerous F1 Driver Rankings floating about thee either, although we're now officially into the second half of the 2013 F1 season, and there probably aren't any big surprises in here... As I'd have to say that Jules Bianchi gets my nod for Rookie Of the Year...