Monday, May 28, 2018

INDY 500: Eddie Who?

The always Outspoken, Brash Edward Cheever, Jr. (Image source:, Photo by Kelly Wilkinson )
Pass Me Duh Potato Chips... Munch-Munch-Munch; Think Somebody's laying another Brick...!

Not sure what's worse? That I watched that race, remember the Hilarious incident at thou local Grocery Store immediately after, since I needed a Beer or Three after watching an IRL sanctioned race. Or that I'm 86% certain what Racin' Duds; Err Finery I wore on said visit...

Twenty years ago this past weekend, Y'all know that the man I Don't Call Underachiever NO More. But instead I just call him Eddie The Mouth! won his lone Indy 500 race piloting a Dallara IR08/Oldsmobile Aurora adorned in Rachel's Potato Chips livery.

As surely Nobody remembers that Buddy Lazier finished runner-up that year, Eh?

For which the irony for Mwah is that Eddie Duh Mouth! Was nominated for IMS Hall of Fame status previously. Whilst Buddy, whose racing resume far exceeds Cheever's hasn't garnered a peed from the IMS Museum for consideration...

As mentioned, following the race, the first I watched from my newly relocated Tomaso Manor, having moved north the previous fall. I hoofed it up to my local (QFC) grocery store resplendent in a racing T-Shirt with Code Blue on the front, with the EKG outline and a Ford/Cosworth IndyCar; Err Championship Auto Racing Teams (CART) Open Wheel Racing car also in FoMoCo' Blue Oval hue.

With the white shirt's Backside blaringly emblazoned in Fire engine "Arrest Me Red" boldly touting The Heartbeat's Just Stopped! With a red Bowtie underneath the caption.

Whilst I'm fairly certain thou Ball cap of the day was my dark blue lid' with white with blue stripes Shelby GT-350 wrap-around hat!

As I stepped up to the cashier, whose name is Bob, and has gone onto etch my name into the Store's lore', now proclaiming every single time I step thru the sliding glass doors and amble towards the checkout registers, Bob bellows "Shopping with Tomaso!" but I digress...

As Bob took a look at me, and apparently noticing my racing finery said: Who Won the Race? For which I blithely replied: Eddie Cheever, to which Bob shot back Eddie Who? To which I said EXACTLY!

For which I've not only cherished that memory for two decades now, since it perfectly summed up my feelings towards the Indy Racing League, which I quickly changed to Indy Retirement League; Cymbol Crash please!

Not to mention the overall Obscurity of who the winner was, since Eddie's probably more recognized for his laying Bricks Colour Commentating on ABC's Indy 500 TV Broadcasts, which this is the last; HURRAH!

But also perfectly defines that nebulously Dark, STUPID and ridiculous Era between 1996-2000 and what us 'Ol Timers will forever know sadly as The Split!

As somebody pass me a Cheeseburger, since All of that talk 'bout Potato Chips makes me Hungry...