Wednesday, July 29, 2015

F1: Budapest and Mid-season thoughts...



Can it already be time for Formula 1's annual summer break - which surely All of the F1 Mechanics are looking forward to..

Bloody Hell! I've finally gotten to watch; Err listen to another Formula 1 race for the first time since Barcelona! As the Spanish GP seems a long, long time ago - which I actually arose for, listened to thy Talking Heads beginning at Oh DARK-30! Uh, 4:30AM Pacific, plus the race's first twenty-plus minutes before simply being too knackered and going back to bed.

Being totally akin to "Louise 'JAGUAR" Hamilton's quip 'bout when he was a 'Wee lad and would watch the starts, go back to sleep and wake-up at the end for another Schumacher victory! As now all we need to do is replace Schuey's name with Hamilton...

Yet little did I know that my TV would "DONE BLOWN U-P!" The night before departing for Indianapolis and  hence, the television "Blackout" all these following months - having finally procured a spiffy new Telescreen the night of the Fontana IndyCar race; but I digress...

Yet during this self imposed Telie Blackout, whilst reading the  daily pundits reports on Zed Internetz, it just seems to Mwah that F1's leadership(?) with ultimately the money grubbing Capitalists at CVC pulling thy strings. While Uncle Bernaughty flaps his wings, Jean Todt hides behind  his desk and the STUPENDOUS Strategy Group throws darts wildly about... I distinctly feel like they're A-L-L just grasping at straws while hoping not to pull the short one.

And with The Lewis & Nico Show still going strong, as the Box Score shows that Rosberg's won three races from Barcelona to Silverstone vs. Hamilton having won just two Pre-Hungary; where I left off of this season 'Wayback on Mums' Day. Nevertheless, Lewis is firmly in command of the championship on the back of his five-wins to NIco's three.

Alas, although I'm NOT holding my breath! Hopefully Budapest can throw a spanner in the Silver Arrows Duo - as it'd be Uber enjoyable to see one of Team Willy's boyz win, or HELL! Even Seb Vettel; GASP! Or even better yet one of the much maligned Red Bulls. Although my Numero Uno F1 pilote' Valtteri Bottas was all the rage pre-Hungaroring, and it would only be fitting to see him hoist his first Grand Prix winner's trophy there.


And with all of the speculation on who'll go where, etc. I'm surprised nobody's gesticulated 'bout thy "Iceman," nee 'Kimster, aka Kimi Raikkonen going to Haas? I mean what better exposure could you get besides that? As they're reputedly a Semi-works Ferrari 'B-Team.

Although I still think Esteban Gutierrez is a better fit for one of the seats, i.e.; Double Dipping marketing exposure from Mexico and America. As thee "Incredible Hulkster" (Nico Hulkenberg) and Gutierrez would make a formable pairing, albeit that would leave American F1 hopeful Alexander Rossi who was second in the points, 65 adrift of this year's runaway GP2 leader Stoffel Vandoorne prior to the Hungarian Grand Prix weekend. Once again on the outside looking in.

Or if you're Hulkenberg which is better? A customer Mercedes or Ferrari lump? And Kimi, the sport's current most favourite F1 driver could surely give Rossi a pointer or two, as Alexander's team leader, but hey, that's why they call it Silly Season, right?

Obviously, A-L-L of the Driver Market fuss was prior to the news of Jules Bianchi's death, which was first reported late Friday evening, the week prior to the Hungarian GP...



Alas, whilst its somewhat funny, as the other nine F1 Constructors seemingly quibble for table scraps, albeit the multi-millions in Sterling Pounds Constructors prize fund awarding AIN'T exactly anythingy' to sneeze at! Yet the Silver Arrows just serenely go on their way pummeling the opposition, as The Lewis & Nico Show juggernaught whistles away countless "Klicks" (Kilometers) en route to another 1-2 finish; YAWN!

You're getting very sleepy, sleepy; Hya!

As it's a virtual Whitewash; Ahem Sir Frank and your predominantly white paint scheme; Hooah! As seriously, Mercedes had won eight-of-nine races Pre-Hungaroring, with Sebastian Vettel's lone victory for la Scuderia (Ferrari) at Malaysia upsetting the German team's Apple Strudel; Err Kart, Ja Volt!

As Lewis Hamilton  has completely obliterated the competition - along with his teammate, having racked up nine Poles in the first ten races, i.e.; Hungary, where he seemingly made Rosberg squirm in the Post-qualifying interviews! As Hamilton passed Vettel for third most ever Pole positions in Formula 1 fittingly at his home circuit, nee Silverstone, before notching his 47th Pole to date at the Hungaroring. Only 21-shy of All-time leader Michael Schumacher's 68 and his Hero Ayrton Senna's 65!

But Williams remains strongly on the upswing, excluding high downforce circuits a la Hungary, Monaco - showing well with its current third place overall in the F1 Constructors standings - as I doubt they'll overtake Ferrari, unless Raikkonen completely packs it in?

Or more likely his car keeps failing him!

And what can I say about the once mighty McLaren? Other than Honda's come up against a much more formable task in the new Power Unit era then its past "Glory Years," a la the once mighty Renault - for which Chris Horner, Helmut Marco and "Deeter Majestik" have taken great Glee in kicking about! As Grizzled Journo' Joe Saward points out the obvious, noting how the days of customer (Cosworth DFV V-8) engine teams winning championships in Formula 1 are long gone!


What an absolutely wonderful weekend 'O racing from the previously known "Hunga-boring!" Which was anything but that, first marveling over a most enjoyable GP2 Feature race on thy Telie, the first I've seen A-L-L season long. Where Team Willy' Development driver Alex Lynn scored his maiden Feature race 'W ahead of Dams team-mate Pierre Gasly, with the exalted Stoffel Vandoorne finishing fifth after an unsafe Pit-stop release netted the Belgian a five second time penalty. As Sergey Sirotkin took the podium's final step with unknown of Indonesian Rio Haryanto sandwiched between S-Squared' (Sirotkin) and Vandoorne.

Although not overly enthralled with getting up at 4:30AM! What an absolutely Wild, Wacky and Wonderful race the B-I-G' BOYZ, aka Formula 1 put on! As I won't try recapping the race blow for blow, as I'll let the Heavy Lifting be done by the "Professionals" race report...


First of all, Yuhs gotta feel for thee 'Iceman, nee Kimi Raikkonen who appeared to have a second place finish in-the-bag, only to see his Kinetic Energy Generator unit (MKGU) QUIT working, and leaving him a sitting duck with a loss of 100bhp or more!

And when would you think that the Talking Heads would A-L-L be in a lather over both McLaren's finishing in the points. Or WOW! Fernando Alonso finished fifth - McLaren-Honda's best season result to date! As  I'm afraid this won't last once we get back to racing on "Horsepower" circuits, nee Spa and Monza for starters.

And the P12-13 place finishes of Williams is certainly not representative of their true performance this year, nor is the Red Bull's double podium finish. Whilst Max "Dutch boy" Verstappen's career best-to-date fourth place finish despite a drive-thru penalty is very impressive, as he's easily my F1 Rookie Of the Year so far!

Meanwhile, "Professor" Steve Matchett's Post-race Quip 'bout Nico Rosberg just wanting the interview to be over were priceless, as I was laughing-out-loud too loudly to remember exactly what he said; Hum, something 'bout body language and Nico rolling his eyes?

As Nico came off to Mwah as a totally petulant, childish bore, whom as thy 'Wee "Willie Buxom" (Will Buxton) eluded to, was chasing his tail A-L-L weekend long! While I thought thee young "Louise 'JAGUAR" Hamilton, which ties in nicely with the reported lion's head tattoo he got on his chest recently! Seemed pretty serene publicly about "His Bad Day at the Office." As he  seemed to be totally taking his driving errors on the chin - not bemoaning how he didn't know what's wrong a la  Rosberg.

And while I've begrudgingly come to the fact that Hamilton's simply the best driver on the grid, I'd have to say that perhaps Seb' Vettel is more ruthless and the only driver who currently can match Lewis's performance. As I'd say the "Smiling Assassin" is definitely back! And it'll be impressive if la Scuderia can ever match the Silver Arrows performance to watch these two go Mano e Mano!

Especially since it was Vettel tying the legendous' Ayrton Senna's career win tally first today in Hungary, as Sebastian notched his 41st Grand Prix victory and seemingly is just getting warmed-up!

As sadly, Me Thinks "Fredrico Suave's" (Fred Alonso) days at the front of the grid are numbered, if not gone? As how many years can the "Raging Bull" toll away behind the wheel of a recalcitrant McLaren? And can Honda, along with Renault get back in to thy thick 'O things? As that was one race definitely worth getting up for!