Monday, June 4, 2012

INDYCAR: While Randy placates Owners - Series keeps dropping ball for loyal fans...

By now Y’all know ‘bout duh Tweet heard ‘round the world; Chirp-chirp? As I found Randy “the CandyMann” Bernard’s tweet apathetic and self-serving... As really Mr. Bernard, some IndyCar Team Owners are mad at you? Hmm? Do you think Uncle Bernaughty gives a shit about the F1 Team Bosses? And NO! I’m NOT comparing Randy vs. the Mack Daddy Formula 1 Supremo Bernard; just sayin’...

Yet what I find more irritating is the fact that I’m still P.O’ed at Mark ‘Graveley James for insulting me a year ago by saying I need to not only attend races but support my favourite drivers by buying their non-existent merchandise.

Case-in-point: I attended this year’s Indy 500 with three ‘KuhNucks whom traveled all the way from Toronto - because it’s MORE cost effective to attend Indy vs. Toronto... Now riddle me that Mr. Bernard? While your humble No Fenders scribe flew all the way from Seattle to take in some racing action since Portland seemingly has become Indy Cars red-headed step ‘Seester; URGH!

Thus, naturally the ‘KuhNucks were in search of Oh KanaDuh’s rising star, thee ‘Juan & only Mayor ‘O Hinchtown, nee James Hinchcliffe swag... Since the very simple Hinch-gear that Toronto Motorsports was selling was reputedly given a cease & desist order to QUIT selling his plain Hinchcliffe hats with nothing more than a red maple leaf upon them; WTF?

And these  Boyz were loaded for bear to Shop-Shop-Shop! But do you think they could find any Hinchcliffe merchandise trailers? NO!!! Only the two behemoth’s known as Penske & Ganassi were conveniently located upon the Speedway grounds - to which even Kurt Cavin & Kevin Lee weren’t aware of during their post-Indy Trackside show, (5/29) although somebody did Tweeterer ‘em and say that the Lids booth in what was affectionately dubbed “Trailer land” did have some drivers merchandise... Yet there were two problems with this. One, it was closed Friday evening when we sauntered down there and Two; why in the HELL is what potentially is now the Official Indy Car Series merchandise provider doing way the hell down at the end of Georgetown street OFF-site, eh? As there were three very disappointed Canadians who wanted to wear Hinchcliffe swag upon raceday - not to mention the fact that I’ve thrown in the towel upon ever finding any Justin ‘BIG UNIT Wilson merchandise... And DON’T even get me started upon the lackluster choices of driver swag in the IMS Gift shop - as why were they selling an Ed Carpenter Dollar General T-Shirt there? Oh Never Mind!

Then, talk ‘bout momentum killers... Whilst I was pleasantly surprised to stumble upon ESPN actually playing a promo for the Belle Isle race on ABC during the last two minutes of the Celtics playoff game; Hmm? Where’s duh qualifying show... What? Versus; Err NBC Sports Network is taking the weekend off? OH SHIT! Guess I’ll haveda try listening to it on the IMS Radio Network; Uhm? Here’s your Sign!

As I AIN’T NO Tekkie; BUTT! Why in the HE-Double Hockey Sticks is the query for IndyCar STILL being re-directed to the starkly bleak lookin’ Mobile webpage when I query it on Internet Explorer; WTF? Thus I jumped over to Mozilla instead and found the radio player link; BUTT SHEISA! At first I thought perhaps it was due to the system being waterlogged? As the Webcast was routinely inter     rupt      ed                    every               fi          ve                    seconds... Which apparently was actually the FRILLIN’        Live      Tim                  ing                   and                  Scor    ing       updates interrupting the broadcast???           As                    I                       must                be            des                  pe                                            rate... to have listened to the entire ‘Qualie show this way; Aye Karumba! Not to mention that it’s impossible to not learn the winner of the Firestone Indy Lights race prior to the delayed NBCSN broadcast...

But really ABC, Disney or whomever the owners of that fine Stick ‘N Ball conglomerate is? You cannot squeeze-in 90-minutes of live IndyCar qualifying on ESPN2... You know like SPEED did back in the final dying dazes ‘O CART. As at least ABC should be required to run a qualifying highlights show like NBCSN does on its intermittent race airings...

‘Whale, otay, I’ll watch the IndyCar36 rebroadcast of J.R. Hildebrand... Oh Wait! Y’all are way ahead of me... As NBCSN bumped the show in favour of its Hockey Nite recap show after the LA Kings went up 2-0 in the Stanley Cup in OT Saturday night... And then Indy Car follows up the 500 by going to an almost impassable Street Circuit; go figure? As I’d say it AIN’T just the Team Owners Randy needs to worry ‘bout! Then again perhaps the Hulman George family is only worried about its bottom line, eh? Yet it seems that the series has miles to go in order to engage its Fan base financially!