Oh Rudolf, you’re definitely lighting up these
amazing No Fenders selections, Ho Ho Ho!
This year’s Holidazes have certainly Stunk! As
Thy Turkey Lurkey Dazes Crud, Err cold that was Sweeping the Nation certainly
took Ye Stuffing Outta Mwah! For which is why these F1 Golden Tailpipe Awards
are fairly Sanguine, Eh?
As Y’all can compare ‘N contrast these Spur of
Ye Cuff, Nonsensical selections vs. last year’s in the link below.
http://www.nofenders.net/2022/02/the-2021-formula-1-golden-tailpipe_0565370627.html
WINNERS
2022 F1 World Champion: Max Verstappen
2022 Constructors Champion: Red Bull Racing
2022 Monaco Grand Prix: Sergio Perez
CATEGORIES
1. Driver of The Year
Winner: Carlos Sainz Jr.
Yeah, Y’all are probably ah-Sayin’ Carlos Who
for Driver Of the Year, Righto? But None of the Usual Suspects did anything to
impress Mwah this year!
What gave the nod to Carlos for Mwah is that He
Doesn’t Whine like other top name drivers, Yoo Hoo Maximus Hothead!
And although Carlos was beset by a bevy of
mechanical Gremlins, multiple Power Unit changes, Pit strategy Blunders and
other team issues. Sainz seemingly didn’t give up and claimed His maiden Grand
Prix victory on His 150th start! Coming on the Heels of His Debutante Pole position,
which ultimately was the first of three Poles scored this season.
Not to mention I’m always amazed at how Hard
Carlos and His competitors work behind the wheel, especially when playing Sainz’as
In-car radio! As it would be nice to think that it’ll be a “Fair” Fight against
esteemed team leader Charles Leclerc in 2023, whenever the new Team Principal’s
announced. Since I’m guessing it’s only a matter of time before Frederik Vasser’s
installed at Maranello…
Other
Choices
Alex Albon, Kevin Magnussen, Valtteri Bottas and
Sergio Perez
2. Biggest Disappointments of The Year
The Biggest Disappointment has to be Porpoise
Gate! Like this is the Sport that Bill’s itself as The Pinnicle of Motorsport!
And yet their brand new chassis were Pogo sticking Up ‘N down the racetracks
All over the Globe, Crikeys! Which is may be why Miami brought in a Bevy ‘O Mermaids
for it’s Grand Prix Debut, Eh? Y’all know, right next to the Faux Lake in the Hard
rock Stadium’s Parkring lot. No, look Over Thar!
As the phenomen was caused by the
reintroduction of Ground Effects in the name of improving F1 chassis following
each other. And as we All know, Mercedes got their design the worst of the Big
Dawgs’ and chased Thar Tails all the way to Abu Dhabi…
Other Disappointments lie with Red Bull Racing’s
Cost Cap infringement of the 2021 F1 Season. Along with ‘lil Maximus Hothead’s
continuous Child-like Tantrum Throwing escapades! As I tried sharing my
thoughts first following Maximilian’s Sky Sports row at Mexico City in the following
No Fenders tome.
http://www.nofenders.net/2022/11/when-motorsports-collides-with-nature.html
And then further pontificated Max’s ridiculous
Behaviour in Sao Paolo, as Seriously Max? You’ve definitely been Naughty this
year!
http://www.nofenders.net/2022/12/oh-max-youve-been-naughty-again.html
3. Race of The Year
Winner: British Grand Prix
Ok, it’s so long ago now, I hardly remember it.
But I know that the Silverstone race was a veritable Donnybrook! As I tend to recall
that Ferrari’s Charles Leclerc was Bellyaching for la Scuderia to put Him in
front of Carlos. With the Spaniard having to pass for the lead twice. Not to
mention during a late race restart. Along with Leclerc and Golden Child’, aka
Sir Lewis Hamilton having a Mega Mano e Mano passing Duel which collectively
had everyone Holding their Breaths as they went Wheel to wheel!
But I was estatic for Carlos finally Breaking
His duck! And He definitely earned this win! As it’s just a Shame He only
netted a single victory this season…
Other
Choices
Brazil, Baku, Mexico City?
4. Most Improved Team of the Year
Winner: Alfa Romeo F1 Team Orlen
Initially I’d planned on giving this choice to the
plucky Haas F1 Team. But upon complying this year’s F1 constructors points tally,
I was more impressed by Alfa Romeo’s improvement.
As the Switzerland based Sauber AG concern
moved up the pecking order by three places, albeit having finished level on
points with Aston Martin. But won on the first Tiebreaker. Arse-sumedly Valtteri’s
two finishes of sixth place being better than Aston’s…
And although it’s a far cry from His fiver year
stint at the All conquering Silver Arrows, Valtteri Bottas scored the bulk of
the team’s 55 points, over four times better than 2021’s tally of 13. With Valtteri’s
49 points netting the Afable Finn’ tenth Overall in the Drivers rankings this
season…
5. Most Disappointing Team of the Year
Co-winners: Scuderia Ferrari, Mercedes-AMG Petronas F1 Team
Giving this to two of the sport’s top Teams for
obvious reasons! Although both have already been discussded Ad Nauseim…
What more can I say about la Scuderia? Although
History will show they finished Runner-up in this year’s Constructors Battle,
they were a distant 200-plus points behind Red Bull! And from mechanical woes
to ridiculous Pit strategies, somebody Had to take the Fall, which is why I
guess Mattia Binotto has reluctantly Resigned after a lifetime at Ferrari…
Ditto for Mercedes, even though I’m quite Happy to Have a different F1 Constructors Champion for the first time since 2014! But you just wouldn’t expect the Eight-times Constructors Champion to get it’s car so wrong, and be the Butt of Porpoise Gate!
