Monday, December 5, 2022

Santa brings Haas F1 Team early Present in Sao Paolo

    As I just Hope Kevin gets to Keep His trophy!


Yeah, if Y’all haven’t already noticed. No Fenders Ain’t the place to go for Breaking News. As it’s a rough life being thee Head Bottle Washer on Ye Isle ‘O Nofendersville Matey’s, but I digress!


By sheer luck, I was able to catch the Friday Qualie’ session from Interlagos, a proper ‘Ol School racing circuit! And the outcome not only put a smile upon my face. But kept a Rosy Glow upon my Cheeks all the way up until the final lap of the Brazilian Grand Prix, when ‘lil Maximus Hothead’ was Naughty!


Whilst Kroftie’, aka David Kroft chimed in that it was the first American (Flagged) chassis to win a Pole position since the 1975 British Grand Prix, Aye Karumba! For which I’m not sure if they mentioned it or not? But I Don’t recall them saying anymore after that.


SO I Arse-sumed it must have been Shadow, and when I looked it up I learned that it was Welshman tom Pryce scoring His one and only Pole position at arguably His Home Grand Prix. For which I immediately said to myself, wasn’t Messer Pryce the F1 Driver Killed by an errant Marshall’s Fire Bottle?


As yes, sadly, tom Pryce Died during the 1977 South African Grand Prix when two Marshalls Had run across the track and Pryce was unable to avoid one carrying a 40lbs Fire Extinguisher, which Clobbered Pryce on His Head, Killing Him instantly!


And Karmically, or ironically? As many will know, 1975 was the year of Mauro Forghieri’s second Formula 1 championship for la Scuderia, as the Italian Engineer died on November 2nd at Age 87. As Niki “the Rat” Lauda won the first of His eventual three F1 World Championships for Ferrari that year.


Whilst 1975 also saw the Death of Penske Great Mark Donohue following that year’s Austrian Grand Prix. As I previously scribbled about Donohue in the following No Fenders tome.


As I’ll say American flagged for Haas, since we All know that the car’s obsessively produced by Dallara of Italy. Utilizing as many Customer Ferrari parts as the FIA permits under current regulations…


But back to our Dane’ in Question, as I just absolutely loved K-MAG’s reaction over His In-Car radio played upon the world feed. Are You Fucking Kidding Me! For which naturally the F-Word was summarily Bleeped. For which I think Kevin repeated twice…


Although somebody on the other end, presumably His Race Engineer told Kevin to Not get Ahead of Himself. As the Q3 Qualie’ session had been Red flagged and there was still 8mins and 10 seconds on the “Clock,” but I’m getting ahead of myself…


As arguably, you’d have to say Magnussen’s biggest claim to fame in Formula 1 was His infamous Suck My Balls! Comment to Nico Hulkenberg Wayback’ in 2017. Although the duo made up earlier this year when Hulkenberg was Deputizing for ‘lil syd Viddle’, aka Sebastian Vettel at Aston Martin.


Which I suppose is a good thing, since thee “Incledible Hulk,” aka Nico Hulkenberg has just been announced as Magnussen’s teammate for 2023, replacing Mick Schumacher.


Although I now recall that Kevin ultimately finished Runner-Up on His Formula 1 Debut Down Under at Melbourne for McLaren in 2014. When originally Magnussen became the first F1 Rookie to score a Podium in His maiden Grands Prix since Sir Lewis Hamilton did seven years prior.


As this was the Grand Prix where the Race Stewards were loathe to Strip Daniel Ricciardo’s second place finish after He’d celebrated during the Podium exercises to a Delirious Home Crowd! Before DannyRic’ was subsequently Disqualified for a Fuel flow violation.


As Kevin’s since raced for Renault in 2016 and Haas between 2017-2020, before He and Romain Grosjean were replaced by a pair of Rookies. With K-MAG’s lone Podium to Date being upon His F1 Debut some eight years ago…


Yet I came to admire Kevin more for His year Stateside driving for Chip Ganassi Racing’s IMSA Sports Car team aboard their Cadillac DPi’s, where Kevin even won a race with teammate Renger Van der Zande on Detroit’s Belle Isle.


And then I really enjoyed Kevin’s “One Off” IndyCar Debut, when He Deputized for the injured Felix rosenqvist at Arrow McLaren SP at Road America. As ironically Rosenqvist had suffered a Nasty, Scary Accident at Belle Isle where His throttle stuck wide open!


And although I really Hoped that Kevin would find His way into a Fulltime IndyCar ride, it had already been announced that He’d signed to be one of Peugeot’s Sports Car drivers for the 2022 FIA World Endurance Championship.


Although we know now that Kevin got a surprise call to return to Haas this year upon the Sacking of Nikita Mazepin, where the Dane’s F1 career seems to have been totally revived…


Fast Forward to this year’s Brazilian Grand Prix, and with the ever changing weather, i.e.; Rain. Along with Haas strategically getting Kevin to the Head of the Pitlane for Q3. And then Magnussen setting the Quickest lap Ahead of the other nine drivers, Wallah!


Thanks to the combination of Mercedes George Russell Beaching Himself and causing the Red Flag, and then the Rain summarily arriving! As it was wonderful Hearing the Happiness in Kroftie’ and Ted Krabitz’s voices when saying we know we’re Not supposed to Root for Anybody, but How can you Not? With Even Martin BillyBob’ Brundle saying we all love Underdogs. Magnussen Shocked everybody with His and Haas’s maiden Pole position!


As Magnussen’s Pole came one day before Team founder Gene Haas’s 70th Birthday, ironically Kevin’s 100th Start for Haas. And occurred on Haas’s 143rd  Grand Prix start.


As Kevin now becomes the third longest wait for an F1 Driver to score their maiden Grands Prix Pole on His 140th Start. As crazily, three drivers have now eclipsed the previous record Holder for longest wait to claim their debut Pole. Which Mark Handlebarz’ Webber had Held since 2009 with 132 Starts.


Yet Sergio Perez shattered that number when finally scoring Pole at Jeddah on his 215th Start! Then Carlos Sainz Jr. scored His maiden Pole at Silverstone on His 150th Start.


As Congratulations Kevin, you Deserve it!