Monday, March 31, 2014

Mother Nature's P1!

What a wacky past weekend 'O motor racing that was, as not only has precipitation exceeded our normal monthly allotment here in the Pacific Northwest, not to mention being a big contributor to the Deadly Mud Slide in Oso, WA; But! How 'bout Malaysia and St. Pete, eh?

Madly awaking just My-nutes' before 1AM (Pacific) in order to watch; Err listen to the F1 Qualie' from Sepang, I could only muster a barely audible chuckle over the RAIN delay, which stretched to 50mins - reminding Mwah of staying up 'Uber LATE into thy night; Err morning to watch a  rain soaked Korean GP Qualie' session a few years ago...

As 'bout the only good thingy from the delay was the ultra rare, never done before decision by NBCSN to show A-L-L three Qualifying sessions without any commercial breaks; HURRAH! As they'd already run 'Dem Defend your Manhood; Uhm, Shield your Leaks Depends add during the rain delay...

Yet it was quite Anti-climatic since I literally couldn't S-E-E SHIT! Although probably better than the drivers were seeing, eh? As I awoke with a startle  from a nasty neck snap at 3:12AM whilst awaiting the Post-race interviews and instead decided to switch off thee 'Telie  and go to bed! Especially since Leigh Diffey kept telling me not to worry over missing the English Premier League Preview Show programming slated for three Bloody AM: CRIKEYS!

As apparently I missed A-L-L of the Fireworks afterwards, as "TWINKIEBOY" (Seb' Vettel) got into a Post Qualie' Spat with "Brittany!" (Nico Rosberg)

then I decided for humour, after all, in for a Penny, in for a Pound, right? As I must be desperate wanting to listen to Mark 'Graveley James voice via Zed Internetz, but hey, after all Indy Lights is the preferred feeder to the B-I-G CARZ', right? Although Columbian standout Carlos Huertas certainly didn't come that route to Dale Coyne's (second) rental car, eh?

As I found the following notice posted at Tracside Online after I couldn't get the Indy Lights Qualie' session to play upon, as they just played a "loop" track extolling the virtues of Mother Speedway, nee IMS instead; ACK!

Attention: Please evacuate all grandstands and open areas and take shelter immediately inside Mahaffey Theater or parking garage, Al Lang Stadium, or the Airport Terminal building behind Turn 2 until further notice.

 And I'd gone to Trackside Online in order to find out what the holdup was over Indy Lights qualifying, since the IndyCar Homepage offered NOTHING regarding the SEVERE weather warning, only claiming that rain was disrupting qualifying that was Online now - before I stumbled into a replay of last year's race being broadcast at 11:08AM.

Waiting to struggle tuning into the "Live" Timing & Scoring page; BUTT of course! Around 1:46PM an overly LOUD industrial strength chipping machine fired up outside my windows - followed by the requisite "leaf blowers;" URGH! I just wanna listen to the season opening Fast Six Shootout you Goofballs!

But it's ok since is qualifying gonna be at 5PM, 5:20PM or 5:40PM Eastern? Listening to Kevin Lee do a radio mike check 1-2-3-4-5 around 2:21PM (Pacific) as the Internetz feed was horrific, cutting in 'N out repeatedly, as Gee Wally, this is gonna be fun; URGH!

And then I-T really got fun; Ha-Ha NOT! As the Bleepin' link wouldn't work; Psst! QUIT F%%KING MOVING the Click Here Live Timing & Scoring link wills Yuh!

As I spent copious amounts 'O time SWEARING at the page, watching the minutes slip by without being able to get a connection, repeatedly trying over 'N over from 2:42-56PM to complete SILENCE every time I clicked upon the Play button; URGH!

For humour I searched the A-L-L knowing INtra-woods to see if there were any other options available? As last year there was an Indycar-radio website which worked pretty good... So there was some  Livestream page I've never heard of before which I proceeded to attempt listening to between 2:56-3PM to a very Warbly inter             mit                   tent                  Pau      l                       Page                            cut       ting                  in &                  ou                        t before I said that AIN'T gonna work; Aye Karumba!

And it must be nice for IndyCar to know that even after our 16-months winter's hibernation, the remaining 43 Diehard Fans will put UP with ANYTHING in order to hear their beloved Indy Cars...

As I persevered a further 12-minutes, even going so far as to Hardboot my brand new 'Confuzer... And was just about to throw in the towel when Viola! At 3:12PM, after about the 69th time of going thru the motions of logging onto, clicking the "LIVE" Timing & Scoring link, clicking upon the Play button - a somewhat scratchy sounding Pippa Mann entered the room... Having only MISSED the entire first two rounds of qualifying; SHEISA!

And the connection was listenable, but definitely NOT perfect, with lots of cutting in 'N out, sound quality issues, etc, and thus, for humour I decided to count how many times the broadcast cut out during just the Fast-Six Shootout session. And thy number is: Broken connection 15-times during Fast-6: 12X in 1st 5mins. Broadcast went pretty well 'til Kevin Lee's interview w/'TK "Follow your Schnoz" (Kanaan) & Scott Dixon - before I pulled the plug, as that's enough of this CRAP!

Not to mention the PATHETIC Soundboard control during Nicky "Salt" Yeoman & Jake "The Riddler" Queiry's Driver interviews; just about lost an eardrum from Queiry SCREAMING at end of Sato Pole position winner interview, having needed to turn UP the volume to hear the 1st portion...

As why in the FUCK am I getting up again at 1AM in order to watch Formula 1 who's race replay just so happens to magically be scheduled at the exact SAME time as the IndyCar TV broadcast on its fellow competitor ABC?

Hmm? Guess it's a good thingy I didn't watch 'til the Bloody end of the "LIVE" qualifying show, since watching the Qualie' replay conveniently scheduled at 11PM (Pacific) and presumably the same show - once again "Peacock-lite" (NBCSN) FAILED to show the Post-qualifying TV Unilateral press conference; WTF??? Oh Never Mind!

But hey, shockingly, at 1:43AM or somewheres about then (Sat morning) NBCSN ran its first promo for their Long Beach IndyCar race - now perhaps if they'd just run I-T during Daylight hours, eh? Like I dunno, during ELP, The Dan Patrick Show, etc.

As note to IndyCar, I DON'T wanna hear one more FUCKING thingy 'bout how Verizon's a game changer and how incredible they'll be for the sport, which I get; BUTT! If I'm so PISSED OFF at the freakish Internetz connection, imagine how those casual twenty Somme-thun' Millenial's instant gratification fans are gonna feel about NOT being able to get a FREAKIN' connection on their smart Do-daddies...

And I know the weather  was a problem, but, guess what? I live in the Freakin' Pacific Northwest where it RAINS A-L-L OF THE TIME! So Deal with I-T IndyCar, I mean Yuhs only had 16-months since the last season to make sure everythingy worked; as I think You need A-L-L the fans you can get!