Tuesday, January 8, 2013

The Tomaso Files: A Few New Years thoughts...

So it’s funny how we’ve all supposedly made our New Year’s resolutions & are sticking to them, right? As obviously I won’t share all of mine with Yuhs, since typically I DON’T make any... And I’m pretty certain I’ll break the ‘Juan or two for this ‘lil ‘BLOB thingy... Which is to try scribblin’ shorter stories - which undoubtedly won’t happen; especially with some doozies already in the hopper... Whilst also trying to pace myself somewhat this year regarding the number of riveting posts published, and hence, I’ll be starting the year a ‘Wee bit slowly, since I'm still trying to not let go of the Holidazes quite yet; having once again stayed up ‘til midnight to watch via le Telescreen the New years ringing in!

As tradition dictates thee annual blowing up a massive amount ‘O fireworks via the iconic Space Needle’s roof, of which said structure was celebrating its 50th Anniversary this year, having hosted the 1962 World’s Fair as  the centerpiece attraction... Y’all know where some dude named “Elvis-the-Pelvis” (Pressley) came ‘N made some movie called It Happened at The World’s Fair. (1963)

And although those red, white & blue ambers have fizzled out, nevertheless I do have a few things stickin’ in my Craw botherin’ me right now, albeit I totally understand how they pale in comparison to the recent tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School, right?

Nevertheless, here goes just a few small observations by your visually impaired No Fenders scribe - who likes to pretend he isn’t blind! Right Mary Ellen?

Hence, I certainly don’t expect any remedies to these everyday problemas for Mwah, especially now that we’ve slid over thy Fiscal Cliff, eh? Or did the Freakin’ politicians actually do their elected jobs somewhat? Oh yeah, that’s right... I keep forgetting IT’S THE ECONOMY’S FAULT!       

Shrubbery Snubbery
May be its just living in Suburbia? But why can’t you home owners, apartment complexes and cities trim your  damn FREAKIN’ bushes that Y’all let overgrow upon sidewalks; WTF? I’ll spare you on how F%%KING annoying it is trying to navigate rough, course and un-level sidewalks with a white cane that grabs every nook, crook ‘N cranny; BUTT! Try coupling that with having to attempt ducking underneath low hanging bushes, being constantly snagged by stickers and branches which proliferate the landscape up here in the Pacific Northwest; SHEISSA!

As although I do attempt trying to memorize every obstacle low, medium and high upon my daily ‘Walkabout routes, nevertheless, quit being so damn Freakin’ LAZY and trim your properties foliage please...

App This!
So apparently my family’s getting tired of my bellyaching over how FUCKED the world has become for the blind & visually impaired in regards to the frenzied fever to be just like apple - who I hold largely responsible for forcing the shift to icon based electronic gadgetry... OOH! There’s an App for this, and this, and this ‘N that! But what if you CANNOT see the Freakin’ Apps? As I don’t envision owning an all conquering “Smartfone” anytime soon; nor an Ipad, Itouch, Icar,  Ibrain, Ilicous; Oh Never Mind!

As I still contest there’s a massive problem coming shortly to the Baby Boomer generation & beyond. It’s called LOSS of vision! Which is a normal part of the aging process, not to mention most likely a byproduct of staring at ‘Confuzers all day long, plus those miniature screens on our cellular devices and tablets... I mean haven’t Y’all gotten your tablet yet?

Yeah, I know that Apple is trumpeting its Serie technology, but, once again, I highly doubt it works for everything, not to mention its NOT currently available on the touch screen debit card reader I’ve been forced to learn how to use at my local grocery store - as I CANNOT see or read the Yes/No buttons when trying to purchase my groceries!

And on top of this comes microSOFT’s HORRIFIC win-DOUGHs 8 software revolution to join the ‘App This Craze! And it gets even better yet, since not only is it totally icon driven, but the “tiles” are also colour coded... Earth to microSOFT! How does a visually impaired person who’s got the added bonus of being colour blind even remotely stand a chance of being able to successfully utilize your software; WTF?  And I really mean WHAT THEE FUCK - RUBBER DUCKY???

As in how in the HELL am I supposed to navigate a touch screen I cannot see or decipher the various coloured blobs onscreen...

And another side effect of this gotta have I-T latest gadgetry craze, which I’m totally positive hasn’t even been remotely considered? Is the fact that it’s routinely pointed out that 70+ percent of ALL blind people are unemployed! Which Gee Wally would imply that they’re probably NOT able to afford purchasing all of this latest ‘N greatest SHIT; Err stuff! Oh yeah, that’s right, I forgot. We’re definitely NOT the manufacturers target demographic. Yet does that mean we should be forgotten or overlooked? As that’s what I call Discrimination...

Tagless Torment
Just another personal ‘Oh-pine-yon here; BUTT! What is the dealio with the rush to produce T-Shirts these days without tags... WTF? Ever wondered how a blind or visually impaired person puts there clothes on correctly? As I typically count upon finding the corresponding care/size label tag which indicates the rear/back side of said t-shirt, yet now in the haste to cut costs and simplify manufacturing... Otay, just guessing here; BUTT! Knock it the FUCK OFF! I mean its bad enough that Y’all have gone to skimpier cotton thicknesses, but now I’m supposed to figure out which side of said t-shirt is what? As I’m guessing Y’all never thought ‘bout that, right?

On Dec 31 I got a call from my Apt Office informing me that it was my final day to sign my lease or go onto month-2-month payments, which are like another $200 more; YIKES! To which I grumbled out loud to the message Huh? As I’d already signed this a month prior.

Calling the office I told them I’d already signed the paper copy several weeks ago to which she said huh? One moment please, can I put you on hold?

You see, once again in that frenzy to go paperless, I’m supposed to sign  my lease electronically - reading ALL of the small print and initialing & signing all of the corresponding coloured boxes... As Gee Wally, guess what? Somebody hadn’t bothered to input my paper copy onto the ALL KNOWING CONFUZER...

Miniaturization Miniaturization, On thee Wall
You Dear Google are NOT thy Fairest of All!

As I deliberated on whether or not to even scribble this or not, since I personally know how thee fine folks at Google do NOT give a SHIT about the blind or visually impaired population! As I’ve tried screaming; Err writing concise letters to  Google, Foundation Fighting Blindness (FFB) and the National Federation of the Blind, (NFB) typically to NO avail...

Yet could we please quit shrinking everything to fit on our all knowing “Smartfone,” making it noxious colour combinations and icon based/driven... I mean once again, how do you think a low vision + colour blind person does trying to navigate gOOgle(dot)com, Gmail and Blogger(dot)com on a daily basis? NOT very good as I’m guessing Y’all have noticed - for those of you still reading this blog or its  corresponding posts...