Sunday, January 27, 2013

Rolex 24: Thoughts upon the Race ‘N More


The No. 61 R.Ferri/AIM Motorsport Racing with Ferrari - Ferrari 458 Italia with Max Papis at speed. (Source: motorsport.com)
So it’s funny how much I’m theoretically slipping... As in winters past I’d have watched a ton ‘O Memorex of past Formula 1 races to fill in the Downtime, yet CRAP! I haven’t even bothered to carve out time to watch my tape of last November’s inaugural USGP at Circuit Of The Americas; CRIKEYS! Whilst its even funnier how as I poond away on thy keyboards my favourite ‘Kuhnadiun rock band RUSh’s Limelight serenely plays in the background...

Thus it was with GURR-REAT!!! Anticipation that I eagerly awaited the green flag flying at Daytona for this year’ s Rolex 24, which for Mwah always signals the start of a new racing season!

And a zillion thought bubbles occurred; as I’m happy to see that Brian Till has moved into Leigh Diffey’s announce spot, who Y’all might recall my pining for as Bob Jenkins replacement last year... While I marveled at the thought that Justin Bell was kind enough to grant me an interview - as he looks set to become an integral part of SPEED’s Sports Cars broadcasts, provided FOX doesn’t obliterate the channel in favour of stick ‘N ball sports when conveniently their portion of ‘RASSCAR expires this August, eh?


And Juan ‘O Oil Pressure’s favourites, ‘TK, thy original ‘TK as in Tommy Kendall succinctly mused ‘bout his first ever rubber chicken autographing experience, which Bob Varsha asked if he still had his famous Chicken car, to which Kendall quipped has its own Facebook page; Hoohah!

And then there appeared to be the No Fenders jinx, as four of my top picks ran into mechanical troubles immediately, with the No’s 00, 60, 61 & 73 all experiencing maladies early in the race; SHEISA! As I found myself rootin’ instead for the No. 2 Starworks DP of le ‘Hamburgular, Razzle-Dazzle & thee Scottish Terrier; although I also found myself marveling over how much I like “Symone Pagenoe” (Simon Pagenaud) as they stuck a microphone in his face after he’d just completed a double stint...

And I also found myself finding some new appreciation for ‘Dashley LePew (Dario Franchitti) after another typical non-plus interview after his driving stint; effectively saying sometimes you’re the bug and sometimes you’re the windshield when describing the ebbs ‘N flow of racing in traffic...

And there was the brief interview with ‘Ol SuperTex, aka AJ Foyt, who took pity upon a past charge of his named Brian till. While as always it’s the drivers & celebrities that get A-L-L the attention, as I read somewhere that Continental tyres would have 85-crew members working on their rubber for the duration of the event. And they’d need 17-semi truck trailers to house the 12,000? Sets ‘O majik black ring thingys - and some further crazy statement like they’d be pumping out 200-sets of tyres every two minutes during the heat of the battle; Aye Karumba! As I know many think Continental is the scourge of motor racing after trying to maneuver their way into IndyCar; but, Y’all gotta respect this monstrous effort, eh?

And that’s just one tiny example of the countless behind-the-scenes efforts that occur that we’re not privy too - as I know I’ve not typed anything yet about the action upon the racetrack, but there’s simply way too much going on to try typing a running diatribe here...

As I found myself agreeing with 15 Days in May’s Mike Knapp about how I always marvel about how I can go to sleep at night and arise 8hrs later somewhat fresh ‘N rested whilst having sugar-plum dreams ‘bout how those 56-enteries have been racing around the clock while my sleepy head lay upon its pillow!

And I got big laughs outta the amusement over putting Juan Pablo ‘MAC Montoya behind the wheel of the #01 this year, as ‘Monty promptly incurred a speeding penalty upon leaving the pits for his first stint, ah, shade ‘O Indianapolis and the Brickyard 400, eh? As hopefully he won’t hit NO jet dryer’s on the high banks this year; Hya! Although ‘Monty stormed backed to the point quickly - as I think he did a triple-stint? As I know he was leading overall when SPEED went off the air at 8pM Pacific...

Think the No. 61 “MAD MAX” Ferrari 458 Italia was leading the GT class at this point, although I lost track since I was busy guffawing over James Hinchcliffe’s Kimi Raikkonen impersonation; thank you very much! As thee Mayor ‘O Hinchtown was in his usual rare form while having lots of extra free-time on his hands since his #70 Mazda 6 Diesel had been retired, as two of the three GX class Mazda’s had tossed their lunches; Err thrown pistons, as Hinchcliffe noted how they’d only managed to do eight consecutive laps at a time; YIKES! Although in fairness to Mazda, this was a brand new program and they’re the very first ever diesel’s to run at ‘DayToner and I wonder if the high banks 31-degree banking had anything to do with their engine maladies?

Hence, as fireworks lit up the sky near 11PM ET - and the Telescreen as Bob Varsha signed off, I wondered if the ‘Chebbies were gonna come outta nowheres? As Tommy Kendall had the best ‘Juan-liner of the day by saying how the only more sand bagging that the Bow Tie brigade was doing was at Hurricane Sandy! As I know Wayne Taylor was a very accomplished driver, but his whiny pitch makes me instantly think of Jim Harbaugh...

Daylight Returns
Trying to decide whether or not to arise at 6AM Pacific to find out who’s leading as daylight returns on the east coast after the racers & crews have toiled thru 13-hours of darkness - the alarm clock rang way too early for Mwah, rising at 5:55AM in order to try opening my eyes ‘N watching at least the very first segment to find out what had gone on during the night...

Ho Hum; URGH! The Freakin’ Ganassi car is leading still; Yawn! And thus my new found enthusiasm for the season went POOF! As I stumbled back to bed instead, as I awoke hours later and just flitted about listening to the time being counted down; 3hrs 13mins, 3hrs 3mins, 2hrs 45mins, 1hr 43mins before as many claim, it became an interesting sprint with the final hour plus remaining - as I finally turned my attention 100% to the finish of the race with one hour eleven minutes remaining...

And what a battle royale between ‘MAC Montoya, Max-the-Ax Angelelli, A.J. Allmendinger & Joao Barbosa, with the latter two deciding Racin’ is Rubbin’ after the Booth Boyz had droned on ‘bout fuel saving strategies - as I still don’t understand why Barbosa was given a one-minute penalty... And I cannot recall so much ‘Wingeing ‘bout unfair horsepower advantages, as NO one claimed they could beat the ‘Cheepster’s Boyz in a straight-up fight, saying the BMW had a clear advantage this year, which makes you wonder why Grand Am took away 300-revs from the Ford’s and slightly corked the Chevy’s air restrictor-wise, eh? As it simply was Monty’s race to lose.

Yet it was a real nail biter down to the last five minutes of the race not knowing whether the Suntrust No. 10; Err new sponsor this year, but just doesn’t seem right calling Wayne Taylor’s car anything else would be able to make a surprise win upon fuel mileage? Nope, they had to make a splash ‘N go with just a scant four and a half minutes remaining and hence, Juan Pablo ran to the chequers to claim his third Rolex timepiece, whilst Scott “Scooter” Pruett tied the legendary Hurley Haywood, ironically this year’s Grand Marshall for five overall victories, who gave a nice post-race interview on duh Freaks! Mentioning how his bum ankle was a result of that horrific brake failure IndyCar testing accident he endured all those years ago back in the CART dazes with Trusport...

Yet how ‘bout that GT battle, eh? Going down to the wire with Audi almost making a clean sweep of the podium in just its sophomore campaign at Daytona Beach! As unfortunately Marcus Whinklehock’s third placed Audi R8 ran out of fuel on the very final lap; Aye Karumba! As I know I watched the race that’s the answer to Andrew Marriot’s trivia question. What race did Marcus lead in F1? As I know it was a Spyker, and he led the race at the red flag due to the horrific “Allskate” weather conditions... Gulp, was it Hockenheim by chance?

And who the HE-LL is this Filipe Albuquerque
?  As somebody quipped how he’d beaten everybody including DER TERMINATOR, nee Michael Schumacher, and more impressively Master ‘Zebb (Vettel) in a past year’s ROC; (Race Of Champions) 2010, and NO less on their home soil in dusseldorf Ja Volt! Hmm? Will this propel him to future single seater stardom a la Paul di Resta?

Otay, I’m exhausted just from typing all of this, and looking very forward to a nice break away from Zed Keyboard, as I haven’t been pacing myself very well so far this year, as after all it is Sunday which is supposed to be a day ‘O rest, right? Which means I’m NOT supposed to be on this DAMN thingy!

Yet I did listen to a great interview with Dario & Jamie McMurry on Speed Freaks later that evening which Y’all might wanna check out...

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