Monday, September 5, 2011

INDYCAR: PULL OVER CAR NO. 22 - YOU’RE IN THE WRONG LANE!

Calling Car No. 22; Copy? Car No. 22 come in. Hey Car No. 22 - Do You have Your Ears on Good Buddy? Son ‘O A Bitch! Can you hear me now Car No. 22? Breaker-Breaker Car No. 22 anser YOUR radio immediately!

FUCK! SHIT! Does Anybody up here in Race Control know how to speak Italian? And it’s a GOOD thing we’re NOT on live TV, right?

I repeat; Car No. 22 please respond now - you’re driving down the WRONG lane... The OUTSIDE lane is ONLY for FASTER moving vehicles... The  middle lane is for medium speed vehicles  and the INSIDE lane is RESERVED ONLY for SLOWER moving vehicles...

GAWD DAMMIT! GEORGE - Answer Your FLIPPIN’ Radio! Crap! Frick! Is it Pan-Tano, Paunt-Uh-no or Pantano? The  Frillin’ BLEEP! WON’T pull over into the SLOW lane to let that Swarmy ex-Champ Car Champion Frenchman who thinks he’s The Greatest go by...

Car No. 22 COPY?

Car No. 22; This is your FINAL warning before Brian goes Postal on Uze...

SHIT! Somebody send that Versus Reporter who likes to tell World War II stories in Victory lane down to Dennis Reinbold’s Hauler ‘N TeLL HIM FOR ME! We’re giving your Car No. 22 an 11-place PENALTY for tryin’ to cut in on ‘Ol ‘PT’s Patented Chrome Horn treatment to What’s-him-name? You know the Frenchie in the boy Scouts ‘O America car... Err, ‘SeaBass? Sebastiane Bourdias or ‘Somme-thun...

And you can tell Dennis if he’s got a problem with it he can come see me as soon as I get back to Indiana!