Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Hey IndyCar – I think Portland’s still available...


So here it is - another Labour Day weekend having just concluded... Which means that the Twenty-ten Indy Car season is almost over, and I haveda say, in a sorta weird, twisted kinda way... I’m finding myself chuckling louder ‘N louder over how members of the Bloggaratzi are Frothing over the loss of certain Oval tracks ‘N IndyCar venues in general... And the slighting of Open Wheels versus that bloated 800lb Gorilla named RASSCAR...

NO, the part that’s killing me the MOST is all of this blather ‘bout needing to go to tracks that aren’t ISC (or SMI) owned, where they put on a good show and are wanted... Hmm? Can Y’all say Portland? As I know a one Mr. Carpets will be bustin’ out the Kleenex upon reading this post... As I still just DON’T get it???

Last time I checked, a few Fortune 500 Companies named Boeing, Microsoft, Nordstroms, Starbucks and Vulcan Ventures were still doing business in Washington, not to mention the Bon Marche being bought out by some entity named Macy’s; Hmm? Don’t they sell some brand called IZOD there? while I think some Company named Nike was born in Oregon?

And in case your unaware of what Vulcan Ventures is, it’s the Venture platform of a one Messer Paul Allen, who was originally the other half of some ‘lil computing company named Microsoft and Y’all know who – Bill Gates, one of the richest Gentlemen in the world is, right? Not to mention how Mr. Allen bought out the all conquering ticketing entity I fondly call RIP-OFFMeister... Officially known as Ticketmaster, who I was forced to purchase my Edmonton tickets thru. (Complete with exorbitant Service Fees!) And Oh-by-the-Way, Messer Allen owns some Professional Sports Teams known as the Seattle Seahawks and Portland Trailblazers...

But instead, the Indy Racing League continues to focus upon the Midwest and East coast, trying to fit its product into whatever venue will hopefully seat the most people (Butt’s) and NOT necessarily provide a good race, which I believe is known as Entertainment dollars...

Thus, I still bristle over Mark James comments about how I as a loyal Fan of Open Wheel Racing need to do MORE then just listen ‘N watch the Indy Car races... But also need to be attending them, talking positively ‘bout them and buying my favourite Drivers merchandise ‘N related Advertising products; Whiskey-Tango-Foxtrot? What was that all about Mr. Gravelly? As this comment came during one of the very FEW Indy Lights races I was able to successfully tune-in via the pathetic indycar.com Webcasts! I mean SHEISA! Indycar.com CANNOT even list ALL of the Indy Lights Radio Broadcast times on its website? NOT to mention the LACK of any Television coverage... Which if it does ever come back, and then it would be nice if they DON’T tell us who the winner is before the tape delayed broadcast, eh? But I digress...

Now, I’m NOT proclaiming that Portland is the BESTEST natural terrain Permanent Road course in North America, nor will I attempt to procostinate who is, although I’d haveda hard time picking between Road America and Watkins Glen... But hey Indy Racing League... Do you remember Kevin Costner’s comments in Field of Dreams? If you build it, they’ll come... As Gee Wally, Err Randy & Terry; Portland International Raceway is ALREADY BUILT! Accessible via the major Highway (I-5) with the entire necessary infrastructure already completed... And Oh My Gawd... It’s even steeped in a rich Open Wheel Racing history, albeit CART and Champ Car... NOT the IRL; Tisk-Tisk! And it’s had some pretty good finishes too; just ask Little Al, Mario & Michael Andretti, Gil De Ferran and Mark Blundell just to name a few...

As for going to races, thanks to IndyCarz current philosophy, the three nearest venues are Edmonton, Canada, Long Beach and Sonoma; both in California, while last time I checked... ‘Los Wages is even further away – and I seriously doubt I’ll be going to any stinkin’ Oval races there! Whilst the first three venues all haveda be at least a minimum of 800-1,000+ miles away; not to mention ‘Juan includes running the Border Gauntlet... Yet all I still hear is never ending prattle ‘bout going back to Phoenix and Milwaukee and Boo-Hoo-Hoo other Midwest venues are disappearing...

I mean; So What! If the precious ICS schedule AIN’T perfectly symmetrical between Ovals “N Twisties, while I get the gist of going abroad to China ‘N Australia... As can you say Greenbacks? While I’m all in favour of Australia rightfully returning to Indy Cars, but perhaps Y’all will wanna check how the Chinese business model worked out with CART/Champ Car, eh? I mean, why not go back to Mexico City instead? As I think its one Helluva lot closer and could become a lucrative market also, right? I mean just ask those Fans affectionately named the Guacamole Heads; Ariva-Ariva-Ariva!

So I won’t hold my breath any longer over Indy Car ever coming back to the Pacific Northwest, as I’m quite certain it will once again be left off the riveting 2011 Indy Car Schedule this Friday... Especially since we’ve got plenty of other choices here... As I find it pretty entertaining how various venues keep getting shuffled due to conflicting dates with RASSCAR... As I’m pretty certain if Portland did miraculously return, it wouldn’t get its traditional Father’s Day date, but a Mid-August “Double Header” with Sonoma would work nicely, while my “Perfect” Double Header would see the Indy Cars run with the American Le Mans Series... Or GASP! Imagine those RASSCAR ‘Pickem-up Trucks Bangin “N Beatin on a Road course... Oh Never Mind!

As can Y’all hardly wait to stay up into the wee hours to catch another riveting race around the Twin Moons ‘O Motegi? Hey, at least Mister Chrome Horn will be there, allegedly due to the helping hands of his Battleing SuperCarz Co-Host Tanner Foust; Aye Karumba!

May be IndyCar should Stay Away from the Northwest After all...

And I know for certain Vancouver, BC will NOT be getting a race, as they used to have a great little Street Circuit event running around BC Place on Labour Day weekend, before CART/Champ Car moved that date to Denver...

Meanwhile, I wonder what the attendance figures for Kentucky will be? As hopefully JP will have a favourable report after his latest trek to the Bourbon State, which makes it kinda funny to think how Eddie Carpenter will be running the Fuzzy’s Ultra Premium Vodka Drinks car there! Then again if the note I just received regarding Hotel fees being overinflated from $189 per night to a WHOPPING $489.00 per night is any indication of how Motorsports Fans are being GOUGED!!! Then good luck Indy Car with increasing attendance...

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