Monday, July 20, 2020

The Tomaso Files: Fourth 'O July's three Ring Circuses Races Hype mostly Exceeds Expectations

What's that 'bout the Postman Always Rings Twice? Although Paul Revere never used this modern day incarnation of a custom Bimmer' to deliver his Rebel Yell. (The Tomaso Collection)
Although should I really be Surprised? Since presumably it's Dan-Dan-Danickers'; Err My Fault for expecting so much, Eh?

I suppose I'm somewhat temporarily Afflicted by Ye Quickly approaching languid Dog-Dazes' Afternoons 'O Summer right now, not to mention the constantly shifting light playing Bloody Havoc with what little I can see Onscreen! Making it Uber Difficult to work upon anything; SIGH!

Not to mention the Delayed implementation of Google's Blogger platform "Upgrade," URGH! Or that I've been spending copious amounts 'o time trying to find a Gory web-based Internets service that will interface easily with my 'Ol School Zoomtext Screen Reader programme; Oh Never Mind!

Alas, I find Thyself somewhat unmotivated to 'write" anything for Ye No Fenders Blog momentarily, now that Thee All Knowing gOOgle Monster's slid it's unwanted Blogger Update 'til thou end of July...

Arse-sumedly this "Tiny Dancer's" Morose is partially due a Wee Bitamyte' that just two Gory weeks shy of my intended company's arrival I still didn't know what state of COVID 19 Pandemic "Rebirth" Mode Oregon would be in? (although like most States, we're going the wrong way.) Or if Oregonians and the General Public Behaved over Ye Fourth?

And it's Funny how much I expected from thou Three Ringed Circus 'O Motorsports over Ye Fourth 'O July's weekend, since I Don't watch/follow RASSCAR', although i was hoping for some precipitation during thou Cup-Lite' Road Race at Mother Speedway to Spice Up the Show.

Since Taxicab Bombers' on rain tyres with Thar single wiper trying to clean the Windscreen on a Road Course would be interesting!

As Shades 'O Circuit Gilles Villeneuve Grand National Slugfest with KuhNucks' TAG', nee Alex Tagliani and Pat "The Carpenter" (Carpentier) from Wayback' come to mind...

Although apparently it was a good 'Ol Donnybrook without thou Wet Stuff, with A.J. Allmendinger & Austin Cindric Beatin' and Bangin' to No Avail!

As it was the IMSA Sports Cars race at DayToner' that got Dumped Upon by Mother Nature instead, Eh? Since they were Delayed by 45mins due to a Thunder 'N Lightning Storm's Delay, Yikes! Or should i say Static Electricity? Z-A-P!

As those traveling from Thee Indy GP outing, nee IndyCar Talkin' Head (Townsend) T-Bell', who was doing his own version of Ye Double! Since he Moonlights as an IMSA GTD (Daytona) Chauffer of the AIM Vasser Sullivan #12 Lexus RC F GT3 racecar.

Along with his two Bosses, i.e.; Top Jimmy', aka Jimmy Vasser and James "Sully" Sullivan, along with Mike Shank, Co-owner of Meyer Shank Racing All aboard a Chartered Flight had to divert to Jacksonville instead of landing at Daytona's Airfield as originally planned.

But once again, IndyCar seemed to be playing Second Fiddle to RASSCAR; URGH! Seriously? No IndyCar Pre or Post-race shows, but Thars a 1hr Sing-along for the Taxicabs preceding the second tier Cup-Lite Bombers; WTF!

Or the totally Disjointed and completely Out of Place interruptions during the IndyCar race by Mike Sunday Night Football Tirico and Dale Jarrett, BARF!

And can we Puh-Puh-Please, Pretty Please either completely get rid of the Uber Annoying Gladiator "Bumper" theme music played ceaselessly during every Gory Intro' and rampant, runaway Commercial Breaks! Since Yuhs know, NBC does truly stand for Nothing But Commercials!

Or at the very least turn I-T Down! Since Thars NO Excuse for Not having figured out the sound levels by now. As Seriously? I can barely hear Leigh Diffey over the Roman Gladiator Fight Musak - BARF!

Oh Yeah, I almost forgot, there was that Indy GP race first thingy' Saturday morning for those of us on the west coast. And like others in Ye Blogosphere', it wasn't a Snoozer, but another Scott Dixon Beatdown did little to make it overly exciting.

And I must say I found it excruciatingly Difficult to stay focused or engaged by the BLA-BLA-BLA Gladiator theme Musak' Blasting my Hearing every 7-8, or was it Six brief minutes before NBC just had to run some more Commercials, Jackarses! Although at least Dixon finally stopped Penske's Domination at Mother Speedway.

As I'll let Racer's Marshall Pruett do ye Heavy Lifting once again, especially since his views upon the Aeroscreen are quite blunt! whilst I believe Marshall knows what He's telling us.

Whilst Racer's Elder Statesman 'Ol R', aka Robin Miller, Ye Curmudgeon 'O IndyCar's also reported  on how insanely Hot the Aeroscreen's "Greenhouse" was for the Drivers during the first two IndyCar events, albeit IndyCar has taken several steps since to try aiding the Drivers, i.e.; moving the Drinks Bottle location, Adding another Cooling Vent and allowing the Crew Member Cleaning the Aeroscreen to give Drivers Cold water bottles during Pit Stops.

Meanwhile, the Rain Delay at DayToner' somewhat Dampened my enthusiasm for the race, albeit it was great hearing Der Heindenmeier's, nee John Hindhaugh's voice again, along with Jeremy Shaw and Shea Adam. But I found myself having trouble staying focused, especially since Thar Sound levels were even Wonkier than IndyCar's were; GROAN! As Pit Reporter Shea Adam was Boomin' over the Racecars, whilst Shaw was at just above medium volume while Hindhaugh's voice was quite Muted, making it Uber Annoying to listen too!

Thus I really Didn't care a whole lot at the end of the race, which is sad since Sports Cars had been Dormant for just over five Gory months! Along with the wrong Mazda won, since I'm a Fan of Tristan Nunez's...

Tincknell, Bomarito lead Mazda 1-2 Finish at Daytona

And I Swore I wasn't gonna do it, but apparently the Siren Song 'O 20 PU's at Spielberg was too much for Mwah, since my internal clock woke me up prior to the Gory 5AM F1 Preamble, for which I dually arose! And I managed to stay awake thru the whole bloody Pre-race and Austrian Grand Prix, which I must say was most entertaining! With le piece de la Resistance being Lando Norris throwing down a Qualie' lap at race's end to Demote Golden Child Off the Podium, Hurrah!

As I really enjoy Alexander Albon's Youthfulness and think He's a pretty good Driver, albeit He needs to Quit letting Golden Child Push Him Around! Like C'mon Alex, next time Hamilton tries Squeezing You, Hit 'em Back! Although Albon's Quip to TV Reporters after Thar latest collision at Austria was priceless!

Alexander Albon
"I'm a bit Fresh right now, so I've got to be Careful about what I say..."

Whilst I certainly made the right call the following weekend when I didn't bother getting up for another Lewis Hamilton Whitewash, this time at is it Thee Styrian GP or the Steiermark GP? For which the Sunday Road America IndyCar race was far more interesting!

As 'Ol Hobbo, nee HobbsCapp', aka David Hobbs used to proclaim 'bout his F1 Colleague Professor (Steve) Matchett having Eyes Sharp as Rats; CRIKEYS! Yuhs Eagled Eyed Blog Readers will have noticed that the image above was Bungled previously due to Technical Issues; Err Operator Error in a previous No Fenders post...

(Picture c/o JD' Creations)

Alexander Albon Quote via Reuters