Friday, September 14, 2018

Indy Cars racing is Far More Compelling than Formula 1



Yeah, Yuhs read that right Kiddies', at least for me this season, with the relentless Drive for Five Dribble...

So my TV was finally unpacked, set-up and connected to my new Cable TV Service Provider Spectrum/Charter, which Oh My Freakin' Gawd! Gives me MORE television channels for less than that BASTARDIZED comca$t Cable TV service ever did that I endured for 13 Bloody years before moving. As Don't let thou moving trucks sliding door hit Yuhs you know where comca$t, as good riddance!

As my service was initiated the week prior to this year's Portland IndyCar race; Hurrah! Which the first programme I watched in it's entirety, after being given a brief lesson upon how to work the brand Spankin' new TV Remote; Hey, you try being Blind!

Which although I'm never happy to hear about somebody's Health suffering, once again, I felt like I was swimming in thou Seas of Synchronicity when reading Mrs. Oilpressures Blog post about her Blurry weekend at Gateway.

Since I always enjoy hearing someone else's take upon vision loss, and its effects upon said person, since after all I've been dealing with my Blindness Daily for over a quarter of a century now. While fortunately Susan's just suffering the ill effects of vision loss temporarily, for which I hope she'll enjoy their upcoming outing to Sonoma with her new "eyes."


Uhm, it was funny how I waited until Saturday's Delayed Broadcast of Qualie' from Portland International Raceway (PIR) that afternoon, beginning at 4:30PM Pacific. Since although I'd been able to listen to the Indy Lights race via Indycar.com, I wanted to hear the voice of 'Ol PT', nee Mr. Chrome Horn, aka Paul Tracy for the B-I-G CARZ' once again.

Thus turning on Thy Telie' some 15mins early to the appropriate channel I promptly said What The Foobar? As the local NBC Sports Network channel was the only one on my TV that just had picture but NO sound; WTF! Although thankfully Leigh Diffey's voice became audible at the appropriate time! thus all I can ARSE-Sume is that the Horse Racing programme had some sorta satellite problema?

Since I'd specifically chosen the TV Package that included NBC Sports solely for the IndyCar TV Broadcasts. Can you Hear Me Now Mark Miles!

And think I've already prattled on 'bout how I'm NOT getting up at Oh Fuck You Dark 30 anymore for Formula 1 Broadcasts, even if they HA-HA! Return Exactly where they left off, BULLSHIT Sister!

Especially since in the 14 races-to-date, there's been a whopping five different Pole winners. With 'lil Sid Viddle, aka Seb Vettel leading "Golden Child" (Hamilton) 3-2 before Danny Ric', aka Daniel Ricciardo claimed the Monaco Pole.

Lewis Hamilton leads Vettel 6-5 for Poles this season, with Riccardo's solitary Pole followed only by Golden Child's "wingman" Valtteri Bottas notching the P1 Grid Slot in Austria. And Kimi the "Iceman" Raikkonen scoring only his second Pole position in a Decade at this year's just concluded Italian Grand Prix.

Meanwhile, if I've done my Ryth-Mah-tickin' correctly, Thars' been a total of seven different P1 Award winners on this side of thou Puddle, as Claire calls it. Although in fairness Team Penske's dominated the results with Will Power and Josef Newgarden notching four apiece.

But at least there's three top teams vs. Formula One's two big Cheeses. As Alexander Rossi leads the way for Andretti Autosport with three Poles this season, with just Sonoma remaining.

whilst thee "Young Wicky," aka Robert Wickens, remember him? Your 2018 IndyCar Rookie Of the Year (ROY) winner claimed a shock P1 award at St Pete's season opener! Along with the likes of le Hamburgular, nee Sealmeister B', aka Sebastain Bourdais at Phoenix, "FAST EDDIE" (Carpenter) at some 'lil 'Ol Oval called Indianapolis and a surprising Marco Andretti leading the way at Belle Isle's first race of the Detroit Double.

Gateway's Qualifying was Rained Out, with Scott Dixon starting P1 solely by virtue of leading the points standings and therefore doesn't count as an official Pole position.

Yet I was wishing for DJ WillyP', nee Will Power to claim his 54th career Pole position at Portland, since it would vault him solely into second for Overall Career Poles, ahead of some Cat named Anthony Joseph Foyt, Jr. - which is exactly what happened in a fairly enjoyable Fast six Shootout at PIR.

Whilst I'm very Happy to hear that Portland's return was an absolute success! And hopefully I'll be Thar next year...


Then came the day I'd been waiting for, i.e.; Race-day! Although it's pretty funny how Peeved I'm over the Sun flooding thru thou front picture window with the blinds cranked fully shut! HELL, I had every shade in the Bungalow's front half fully shut but was just being bathed in muted sunlight NO less!

As it's pretty funny since I still wish to be able to SEE the TV Screen even though I cannot see the cars zooming by, or anything at all upon the screen! Other then occasional snippets of in-car camera shots.

And with NO Disrespect to Dixon, I'm simply rootin' for Rossi to claim his first IndyCar Championship this year, which would be a mild upset, since most likely Dixon will prevail at Sleepy Hollow; Err Snorhoma' this weekend.

As I won't try recapping Portland's Electrifying race, C'mon Jeffie', where's your Bleepin' Brain Dump story Dude! Yet instead I just sat transfixed with four sets 'O fingers crossed shouting feverishly at le Telescreen C'mon Taku! Don't you let Hunter-Rey by! Go Takuma. C'mon Taku-san', G-O!

Although it was amazing how badly thou Bungalow echoed from my Shouting Takuma Sato's name, since the walls are still devoid of any Artwork...
With my only complaint of the IndyCar broadcast being that there wasn't any Post-race Show scheduled, along with chopping off the race at 2:18PM Pacific in order to runaway to RASSCARLAND' for a riveting 40+ minute Pre-amble; Err preview, BARF!

Yet I suppose this should have been a Harvenger 'O Thingys to come, Eh? After waiting 'N waiting All Day long for the encore presentation of the Italian Grand Prix at 8PM Pacific, What The Fuck! As some tennis match made us wait another half hour before finally showing us the F1 action from Monza - FAULT!

And I Don't want to say it was a Boring race, especially since I was hoping Raikkonen could do the unthinkable and finally win again, no less than for Scuderia Ferrari on their Home Turf!

But it wasn't to be, as I found Kroftie' and BillyBob's endless, nasal monotone race call to be sleep inducing, especially after the exciting IndyCar race from Portland.

As I was totally Gutted when Hamilton passed Kimi for the eventual win, and was so disappointed that I didn't even wait to listen to those Sliced 'N Diced Top-3 winners interviews.

Surely Y'all can come up with a better Podium Winners Interview format then currently? As I never thought I'd be opinin' for those Days of Celebrities talking briefly to the Top-3 Finishers atop the podium, a la Captain Picard doing a Shoei' by Drinking from Riccardo's Boot on NBC Sports...

Instead turning Thy Telie' immediately off after the chequered flag was thrown and hightailing it to Slumber-land instead...

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