Monday, August 1, 2022

IndyCar Radio Pulls A “Heidi!”

Uhm, what’s that ‘Ol Verizon Commercial About Can You Hear Me Now?


All I can Arse-sume is that somebody was Asleep at the Wheel! As I was patiently Ah-Waitin’ Saturday’s IndyCar Mother Speedway Road Course race. Y’all know where Indy Cars are the Undercard of the Undercard of the RASSCAR’ Undercard!


Trying to “tune In” at 9:08AM Pacific on’s Radio page, I was mightily Cornfuzed Hearing the voice of Sid Collins telling us we’re in a Rain Delay, Huh?


So I tried refreshing the page a few times, and then closed my browser completely and tried opening a “Clean” page All to No Avail, WTF!


Wondering if the race start had been Delayed for some unknown reason, I went and turned Thy Telie’ onto Big NBC and Shuddered over Hearing Kevin Lee telling us You’re watching IndyCar Live. As it’s Funny how the TV Broadcast Has become my Backup…


So I went back to thoust Confuzer and Sid Collins was still talking, just “Killing Time” during the Rain Delay, saying are you there Lou Palmer? On what apparently Had to be the 1976 Indianapolis 500, since I chuckled over Hearing a very young sounding Paul page talking to the driver of the #68 Noroton Spirit, Penske’s tom Sneva. With Page noting how the year before Sneva had been involved in a frightening accident when He Barrel rolled His car over ‘N over down the Straightaway!


The World’s “Fastest” School Bus Driver from Spokane, Warshington’, before He became known forever as The Gasman! Told Page how He’d been Hit by Debris which Had taken out His windshield and also Hit His Helmet! But they’d been able to replace both to which Page said that the rain delay was a good thing for Sneva, before going back to Collins who said now let’s Hear from Lou Palmer.


As I found this very Apropos, Karmic or Symbiotic. Since just a few weeks ago I was talking to somebody In the Valley of The Sun who told me She had a new Pickleball partner who’s initials were TS. As in none other than Tom Sneva, The Gasman!


So it Had to be getting close to the race’s start and still Nobody Had Woke Up on the Internet Broadcast… So back to my TV and now the cars were circulating around Mother Speedway behind the Pace Car with Townsend Bell saying do you Copy Felix? As T-Bell’ talked to Pole Sitter Felix Rosenqvist during the Pace laps which I always find to be ridiculous!


So I sat Thar “Watching,” Err listening to the start of the race being called by Leigh Diffey, Bell, James Hinchcliffe and ‘lil E’, aka Dale Earnhardt Jr. And it just seemed Surreal, and strange listening to the Television Broadcast, especially with Earnhardt in the Booth! Since I’ve come to Depend upon the IndyCar Radio network’s Broadcasts instead! And Haven’t listened to a TV Broadcast since the Indy 500 when my Power went Out the Night before…


On lap-4 or so, I went back to my Confuzer and suddenly at 9:36AM Pacific, whomever was Asleep at the Control Board suddenly Woke Up and after having refreshed the page again. It suddenly abruptly cut off and came into the middle of a current race Commercial!


Then Adding Salt to the Wound, the Glib Female Promo Gal said Cooingly: Miss a Broadcast? Go to Spotify or and Never Miss a race! Which Yo Sweetheart, I am Tuned into right now and you Clowns Screwed Up Again!