Wednesday, June 16, 2021

Who will be Andretti Autosport’s Top Banana this Year? Or will it be Banana Splitz?

Although I know the obvious answer, I certainly Hope it Ain’t So, since I’d prefer it being Alexander Rossi!


While Thars’ very few Bloggers I read these days upon Ye Intrawoods’, nee Internet, since Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary ellen says I’m showing my age by continuing to call it thee Internets, and Nobody gets that ‘Ol George The Decider!” Bush reference. And probably thinks I just Don’t know how to speel, but I digress.


Although I’ve tried expanding this by adding Mike Silvers The Pit Window and Patty Nolan’s I Kiss The Bricks to my IndyCar Blogger’s Shortlist of Oilpressure, For the Love of Indy and The Field of 33…


Alas, my new totally button-down, 100% No Nonsense Corporate Biz-Speak’ Screen Reader who I originally nicknamed Ken in deference to “Ken & Barbie,” I think I’ll now call “Him” Mark, as in deference instead to IndyCar’s No. 1 Puffed Shirt! A One Mr. Mark Miles. And NO! That Ain’t No Gory compliment, but I definitely digress further!


As Geo. Phillips of Oilpressure Fame, who’s Ye IndyCar’s Oldest Blogger, Hya! Previously pondered if thou Curmudgeon ‘O IndyCar’s ‘Ol R’, aka Robin Miller had made a typo when pondring ‘bout IndyCar’s Big 4? George started going Team by Team.


Musing over the now rebranded Arrow McLaren SP outfit that I prefer the smarmy acronym SPAM’ for, Hya!


George noted how the Team’s a totally different “Animal” now vs. it’s previous Schmidt Peterson Motorsports incarnation where Symone’ or Pageantry’, aka Simon Pagenaud and Thee Mayor ‘O Hinchtown had only won a total of seven wins since 2010, with Hinch’s and the team’s latest coming at Iowa in 2018. (Having begun this prior to Pato O’ward’s Breakout Debutante IndyCar W’ at TMS this May)


Hence this got me thinking about Hinchcliffe’s rather lackluster career and how his move reuniting with Mikey A’ would pan out? Along with who’s the Biggest “Cheese” on Andretti Autosport’s “Campus” and their apparent pecking order? (Thru this year’s Indianapolis 500) Which Sadly, I’d say the quick answer is already defined by their current Car numbers, Sigh!


Colton Herta

Car No. 26

Age: 21

First Race: Sonoma, 2018

Wins: 4

Poles: 5



2017 Indy Lights rookie Of the Year

2018 Indy Lights Runner-up


Having finished third Overall in last year’s IndyCar’s Championship standings, along with being the series Youngest ever Winner, plus being the only Andretti Autosport Driver to have won a race the past two seasons following this year’s Indianapolis 500. Obviously the young Phenom is the future of Andretti Autosport which was recently confirmed with his new two year Contract extension. As All of the “Signs” point towards a glittering IndyCar career, potentially as a Multi-times Series Champion with multiple wins whilst chasing that most elusive victory, the Borg Warner trophy!


Alexander Rossi

Car No. 27

Age: 29

First Race: St Pete, 2016

Wins 7




2016 Indianapolis 500 Winner


Full disclosure, of this Quartet, Rossi’s my Favourite, and I’ve been a Fan of his for several years now! And find myself rootin’ yearly for him to not only win his first NTT IndyCar Series Championship, a la like I did until DJ WillyP’ (Will Power) finally closed the Dealio’ in 2014, but to also win another Indy 500!


Surely Alexander had “Designs” of becoming the De Facto Team leader upon signing his latest Multi-year Contract extension, and obviously Bristles over the Fulltime arrival of younger team-mate Colton Big Shot! Herta. But Rossi’s had a nearly two years Brutal streak of everything imaginable going wrong! And hasn’t won a race since his dominant victory at Road America in 2019! And after publicly decrying Nothing less than a Championship this Season is Acceptable, naturally He’s feeling the Heat of becoming Number Two at Andretti is inevitable.


Ryan Hunter-Reay

Car No. 28

Age: 40

First Race: St Pete, 2003

Wins 17

Poles: 7



2012 IndyCar Series Champion

2014 Indianapolis 500 Winner


Must say I’ve never truly been a fan of Hunter Reay’s, and in fact I took to calling him Bully Ray here on No Fenders for awhile after his unnecessary “Turfing” Off Oriol “suitcase”  Servia! That said, I later took to calling him the Dude! As I feel he totally got a raw Deal from former Champ Car Boss Paul Meatheadz’ Getilozzi! But Patty Nolan’s (I Kiss the Bricks) comments of RHR’s Aloofness at the Indianapolis Museum recently does nothing to change my not liking him, But I digress…


While Ryan’s repeated description of the Cartoon Anvil repeatedly Hammering his No. 28 ride is absolutely true, you’ve gotta feel Hunter-Reay’s better days are behind him. And as P3 on Mikey A’s Depth chart, I’d say he blew his biggest chance at Mother Speedway to redeem himself, and this will be his final ear in IndyCar’s. Since I’ve been saying how either Oliver Askew or Kyle Kirkwood, who are both current Andretti Autosport members are eagerly waiting to fill his seat. But then again, I thought Helio Castroneves would never win another Indianapolis 500…


James Hinchcliffe

Car No. 29

Age: 34

First Race: Alabama , 2011

Wins 6

Poles: 1



2010 Indy Lights runner-up

2011 IndyCar Rookie Of the Year

2016 Indianapolis 500 Pole Winner



Can I say about this “quirky” Kuhnuck? Since although I’ve always enjoyed his On Air personality, the lone time I met him in the Aisle of a “Puddle Jumper” flying from Indianapolis to Detroit, I found him to be pretty Snarky!


Obviously I feel like he got Screwed by Sam Schmidt, who’s also tossed  Tristan Vautier and Oliver Askew out like Ye proverbial Cold Bath water! But after his Breakout 2013 season at Andretti Autosport, when scoring his first three IndyCar wins, He’s never really taken off as a true Championship Contendah’, since presumably he went to Schmidt Peterson Motorsports in order to not be part of the Multi-car Andretti pressure cooker.


And The Mayor ‘O Hinchtown seems to have excelled better out of the cockpit as an Announcer then inside it, since this year’s return to Andretti has been nothing short of a Nightmare! Having just read he’ll be part of the XRX Announce Crew this summer, how soon before he’s commenting Fulltime? Although I’m Not trying to imply anything there, but you’ve gotta wonder how long he’ll remain Andretti Autosport’s 4th “Wheel” Eh?