RETRO: Smokey's Definitely Got's the Hammer Down Now!

2017 Pontiac Trans Am Bandit limited edition. (Image source: autospies.com)

As that's a B-I-G' 10-4 Rubber Duckie!

Ah', what better way to celebrate Black Friday... As Y'all are presumably recuperating from another Madcap Turkey-Lurkey Day, amid Wall to FREAKIN' ANNOYING Wall 'O 'Dem Pigskins bein' tossed around!

Just think, thanks in NO large part to that Irrepressible Bandit in a Black Trans Am with the delightful Sally Fields ridin' Shotgun. Not to mention Snowman behind the wheel of that 18 Wheeler carrying thou precious cargo... We're all able to now enjoy that Adult Beverage West of Ye Mississippi, or wherever it was Banned; YEEHAW!

As did Y'all PickemUp' on my Oh, so Clever Black Friday tie-in? Uhm, black Pontiac Trans Am... As may be I'd better put that Coors down, eh? Although I'm a Deschutes Man now instead...

VIDEO: Smokey and The Bandit's East Bound and Down Theme Song

Per Tipicali here upon thou Isle 'O Nofendersville, once again I've simply not had time to crank this riveting No Fenders post out. since presumably Y'all know by now that the legendous' Burton Leon Reynolds Jr. has departed to that Shopping Mall in Heaven, where the theatres playing All of his Hit Movies.

Actor Burt Reynolds Dies at 82

As it's hard to believe that it was 41yrs ago when Smokey and The Bandit was en route to becoming the Nation's second largest grossing movie 'O 1977, surpassed only by some George Lucas Flick called Star Wars.

And whilst for many, Reynolds became known to us for his haunting role in Deliverance in 1972,

having subsequently learned he was on Gunsmoke from 1962-65.

Yet I won't try recanting each 'N every one of Reynolds films, other than it really doesn't feel like it's been over two decades ago since I last witnessed him in person upon thou Big Screen, when I saw his last great film appearance in Boogie Nights. As I can even still recall what he looked like in that film, sans toupee and trademark mustache.

Although I don't believe I've ever been able to sit thru it's entirety, somehow I do recall snippets of that Flop of a racing movie called Stroker Ace. Most notably with Burt in a Chicken Suit and 'Ol gomer Pyle', nee Jimmy "Back Home Again" Neighbors as his Crew Chief. Whale' Golleeeeeeeee...

As I'll let Y'all be the Judge over which is worse? Stroker Ace or Dazes 'O Blunder'; Err Days of Thunder? Or perhaps that epic Sly Stallone Film I'll forever remember Awntie' Harriet calling "Drive;" Uhm I meant Driven, but I digress...

Although Reynolds himself has noted that Stroker' was his Downfall, especially in light of deferring the Terms of Endearment's movie role that went to Jack Nicholson the same year!

Burt Reynolds: What I'd do Differently

But it now seems logical that Reynolds would do a Taxicab Bombers' Roundy-round movie in 1983, since somehow, ARSE-Sumedly 'cause it was before my motor racing Baptism in Earnest began?

I somehow never knew, cared or figured out that the "Bandit" moniker in the Mach 1 Racing Skoal Bandit's name was in deference to  his partnership with Hal Needham as NASCAR team owners.

And ARSE-Sumedly the Mach 1 Racing name came about from Needham's controversial Budweiser Rocket Land Speed Record Car Caper with Stan Barrett in '79. When Needham claim's they were the first to ever break the Sound Barrier...

Hence logically, Barrett would be the team's first "Wheelman." When the team campaigned it's No. 22 Pontiac Grand Prix during their debut in 1981 - before switching to Buick Regal's the following season.

But it was the team's second car, the #33 with Harry Gant behind the wheel that put them on the map. As Gant won nine NASCAR Winston cup races whilst driving for them between 1981-88. Before Needham pulled the plug the following year and sold the team to Travis Carter.

While the last time I recall seeing Reynolds on TV was several years ago? At least awhile ago upon another zany, wacky episode of Gas Monkey Garage's Fast 'N Loud TV Show, when they not only built a replica Bandit-mobile, but got a cash bonus for getting Burt's "John Hancock."

VIDEO: Burt Reynolds - Fast 'N Loud

While I also enjoyed seeing briefly Good 'Ol "Fluffy," nee Gabriel Iglesias on the Jay Leno Garage TV Show with his 2016 limited edition "Throwback" Trans Am Bandit SE replica, one of 77 units produced by Trans Am Depot. Which Jay good naturedly thrashed.

VIDEO: Bandit Trans Am SE edition - Jay Leno Garage

Or Y'all can check out the company's official website upon the 2016 Bandit SE Edition here: Bandit - Trans Am Depot

As hopefully, We've All got A Long Way to G-O', and not such a short Time to Get Thar; Oh Never Mind! As I'm East Bound and definitely Down...

Female Speed Demon Kitty O'Neil Flames Out

The controversial Budweiser Rocket Car, the protégé of the SMI Motivator, with Hal Needham and Stand Barrett alongside. (Image source: bluebird-electric.net)

Naturally, when I heard the words Stunt Woman and Speed Racer when perusing the New York Times Obituary section, I said Whoa Nelie! What's that All about?

And making me even more curious was the article's beginning, on a Dry Lake Bed in the Alvord Desert in Oregon; Huh? This Brazen Femme fatale tapped the "Loud Pedal" twice before rocketing into the distance in a Blur aboard the SMI Motivator; Say What?

The woman at the controls of this three wheel Rocket Car was Kitty O'Neil, who'd set the Land Speed Record for Females in December, 1976.

Yet making Kitty's Daring Feat even more remarkable, was Hurtling to an Uber Stout velocity of 618mph-plus on her first pass, before shrieking back on her second flying Kilometer run to record a two-way average of 512.710mph - is the fact that she was Deaf!

As Kitty's record as the Fastest Woman still stands some 42 years later!

 

Kitty O'Neil, Stunt Woman and Speed Racer is Dead at 72

Kitty first hoped to become an Olympic platform Diver for the 1964 Tokyo Summer Olympics, but was sidelined with a broken wrist, along with suffering from Spinal Meningitis. before deciding she wasn't interested in Diving anymore, as it  wasn't Scary enough for Her!

As Kitty's "Need for Speed" began by racing motorcycles, where she met fellow motorcycle racer and future partner Ronald "Duffy" Hambleton, who was a Stuntman working for Stunts Unlimited.

After Hambleton spent two years teaching her the tricks of the trade, and how to protect herself, Kitty was ready to become a professional Stunt Woman.

Kitty quickly landed work on two Hit 1970's TV Shows, where she Stunt double for such leading Ladies as Lindsay Wagner, flipping a Dune Buggy in The Bionic Woman. And Linda Carter, jumping then a record 127-feet in a Super Woman episode; aye Karumba!

Kitty also worked on other television shows like Quincy and Beretta, along with working in such movies as Airport 77, The Blues Brothers, Omen II and Smokey and The Bandit II to name a few work projects before retiring in 1982.

But apparently racing motorcycles wasn't fast enough for this Dare Devil, who ultimately held 22 land & water Speed Records, including water skiing at 275mph! While O'Neil ultimately gravitated towards Rocket Powered vehicles, with her zenith coming aboard the SMI Motivator, for which I'd never heard of before.

SMI Motivator

This Hydrogen peroxide propelled Rocket Car was owned by the legendary Stunt Director Hal Needham, for which Y'all might have heard of him? Can Yuhs Say Smokey and The Bandit?

While O'Neil had connections to Needham, who's Stunt Company was named Yuhs Guessed It! The aforementioned Stunts Unlimited, for which Kitty was the first female member.

Unfortunately, she wasn't allowed to keep Wonder Woman's lasso, which would have come in handy during her Land Speed Record attempt. As Needham had signed her to a contract allowing her to only utilize 60% throttle power for only breaking the women's Land Speed record.

As Needham wanted the glory of breaking the overall Land Speed Record All to himself!

"On each of her practice runs, O'Neil pushed the car up to speed with ease, and when she officially broke the record, she was still only using 60 percent of the Motivator's power. "There is no doubt," Sports Illustrated reported, "that by dialing in more power...Kitty would have gone still faster"--past the overall land-speed record (638.388 mph, set by Californian Gary Gabelich in 1970) and maybe even past the sonic barrier.
But dialing in more power was not an option for O'Neil: under her contract, she was only permitted to drive the "Motivator" to a new women's record. The movie director Hal Needham had paid $25,000 for the chance to steer the car to a new overall world record, and he was determined not to lose that chance to a woman. So, after O'Neil set her record, Needham rather unceremoniously demanded that she be pulled from the drivers' seat. (His spokesman even told reporters that it would be "degrading" for a woman to hold the "man's" record.) While the lawyers squabbled, it began to snow, and Alvord was closed for the season. Needham never even got behind the wheel."
(Source: gregwapling.com)

As John Radewagen, a Chicago PR Man representing Needham and the Gabriel Toy Company that was preparing to launch Hal Needham Action Figure toys, claims he was falsely quoted over the Sexist remarks, albeit the Needham toys were "Pulled!"

While Kitty would have her own action figure Doll marketed by Mattel. Along with a television movie about her life called Silent Victory, The Kitty O'Neil story starring Stockard Channing produced.

Then further muddying thee waters, reportedly the SMI Motivator was severely damaged and a second Motivator built, before Hollywood Stuntman and latter 'RASSCAR "bomber" pilot Stan Barrett controversially broke the Sound Barrier in '79 aboard Needham's newest three wheeler incarnation, the Budweiser Rocket, a  direct descendant of the SMI Motivator.

As I've scribbled 'bout the Budweiser Rocket previously upon No Fenders Wayback in Twenty-ten, but wasn't aware of the SMI Motivator until reading Kitty O'Neil's obituary in the New York Times...

The 700 Club

Sports Cars Shanghaied' by Weather, World's Press

Uhm, pardon me "Main Stream" Media, would you have any FIA World endurance championship race results to share?

Otay, I'll admit that I was mainly excited to watch, Err listen to the World Endurance Championship's (WEC) Six Hours of Shanghai Sports Car race on the Velocity Channel Saturday evening for the sheer novelty of being able to do so. Since like I've prattled on previously, I've never had television access to this Bloody TV Channel before.

But All I can say is Oh, My FREAKIN' GAWD! And I thought the sky Sports regurgitated F1 TV Broadcasts Stateside were bad; Yowzah!

My first bout 'O consternation came when the voiceover Dude kept Bangin' On 'bout the Live Coverage of the race, albeit the programme's duration was slated for a scant 90mins total of the race's 6hrs length. As we went a whopping 5mins before the first commercial break of similar duration.

And whilst I enjoyed the announce crew of Martin Haven, Graham Goodwin and especially thee "Scottish Terrier," nee Alan McNish. Along with Pitlane reporter Louise Beckett, I simply cannot say I was even slightly impressed with the broadcast itself.

Naturally, I'd ARSE-Sume' that since Velocity was only devoting a quarter's duration of the event overall, that I'd be watching a canned Highlights package Show, which is why I couldn't understand the ceaseless prattling on 'bout it being live.

And I knew it was gonna be Boring since the Heaven's had opened up with the race being started behind the Safety Car whilst McNish wryly noted to put the kettle on... As the race was Red Flagged due to the obscene amount 'O Standing Water, after one of the Rebellion Racing's LMP1 Non-Hybrid Prototypes had gone Snap-spin Slithering off into the "Armco" barricades behind the safety car, as the racer's couldn't generate sufficient Heat into Thar tyres to get any sort of decent traction!

thus I listened distractedly to the broadcast crew ably filling time during the red flag  conditions until 7:45PM Pacific, 15mins before The Show was gonna end. Before saying NUTS! And switched off to go back to listening to my most enjoyable Ken Follett CD Audiobook World Without End instead.

So, if the Velocity Channel's really only airing the first quarter of the WEC Sports Car races live, then Shame On Them! Like seriously? Would ravenous NFL & College Football Fans wish to only see the first quarter of the game?

Although the Shanghai 6hrs race certainly lasted longer than that with its multiple Red flag periods and multiple Safety Cars being deployed...

Toyota perseveres in Heavy Rains to Win Shanghai Six Hours race

But surely there would be a quick race recap version in Thy Daily Newspapers I peruse via my NFB Newsline for The Blind telephone service Sunday morning, Righto?

STEEE-RIKE! YOU'RE OUT!

As naturally I wouldn't expect any local or national Newspapers Stateside to say anything, especially when Duh Chase', Y'all know some Roundy-round Taxicabs series crowns it's champion at Homestead Sunday...

Thus I began with my normal World selections, The Guardian and Reuters, which both had nothing! Then Ditto for the London Telegraph and Daily Mail. Whilst the BBC didn't even offer a Sports section; WTF?

Instead, All of the European Rags' were All Ah-lather' over some horrendous Macau F3 Shunt which saw one of the competitors flying thru the air and landing in a Kerbside' Photographers "bunker," and sending five persons to Hospital! 

Motor Racing: F3 Driver Floersch Fractures Spine in Huge Airborne Crash

As so much for trying to watch the world's Premiere Sports Cars series on Thy Telie! As I found it to be an absolute waste 'o time...