Monday, July 19, 2021

F1: Historic Sprint Qualifying Race is A Dud!

As the second fastest car starts on Pole…


While I typically enjoy The Guardian’s Formula 1 Beat Reporter Giles Richards articles, I was totally unimpressed with the Headline imploring his take upon this weekend’s “Historic” Sprint Qualifying format. Seriously, is this considered History making?


And like Ye Oldest IndyCar blogger Geo. Phillips time honoured motto proclaims: “change is Bad!”


As Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy with the results, since I’m totally opposed to Golden Child’s (Lewis Hamilton) continuous winning of every bloody thing! As it was pretty Funny that Sir Lewis was Denied an record equaling eighth Pole position at his Home track of Bloody ‘Ol silverstone!


But sorry ‘Ol Billybob’, (Martin Brundle) who proclaimed towards the latter stages of the “Electrifying,” NOT! Sprint qualie’ race, “If it Quacks like a duck, then It’s a Duck!” To which All I’ve got to say is Quack Quack, Gobble gobble, Duck turkey!


Although Brundle did have a very entertaining One liner ‘bout the combined ages of Fredrico Suave, aka fred Alonso and ‘lil Syd Viddle, nee Seb Vettel being 74 years “Young,” Hya! As the two longtime protagonists were furiously scrapping over ultimately 7th place, with the duo improving Thar Friday results.


As Max Verstappen Blitzed Sir Lewis off the line, beating the Pole sitter into Turn One and never looking back, despite his front Brakes catching on Fire when waiting for the lights to go out from P2!


As did this really Spice Up the Show? Uhm, I’ll go out on a limb and say Not Really!  Since the first two cars to improve Thar positions, besides Hamilton and Verstappen inverting positions were the two McLaren’s, thanks solely to Red Bull’s Sergio Perez’s “Tank Slapper,” seeing the Mexican demoted to P20 on Sunday!


And the “Adoring” British Fans wintnessed Team Willy’s George Russell demoted One position from P8 Friday, while Ferrari’s Carlos Sainz had a lurid Qualie’ race after being “Punted” by Russell’s Williams, before recovering to finish 11th, two positions behind his Friday results. While Aston Martin’s Vettel rounded out Friday’s Top 10 first Qualie’ session in 10th, one place ahead of Bosom Buddy Alonso.


Although  I suppose the midfield “dicking” was entertaining, but once again the Fans ultimately get Cheated, since presumably  15 minutes of Ontrack action was lost on Saturday, i.e.; Knockout qualifying vs. Sprint Qualifying race duration.


As Saturday’s Sprint Qualifying Top 10 results were as follows: Verstappen, Hamilton, Mercedes Valtteri Bottas, Ferrari’s Charles Leclerc, Lando Norris, Daniel Ricciardo, Alpine’s Fernando Alonso, Vettel, Russell and Alpine’s Esteban Ocon.


But George Russell was subsequently handed a three place Grid penalty for causing the collision with Sainz and will now start P12, with Ocon, Sainz  and AlphaTauri’s Pierre Gasley moving one position forwards.


Whilst it Pains me Ah-Mighty’ to actually agree with ‘lil syd Viddle for once, Ouch! As Sebastian Vettel has correctly pointed out how for the first 71 years, or 72 Seasons, Pole position has Always been determined by the Fastest Car’s elapsed time during the myriad of Qualifying formats utilized. As Nico Rosberg also Heartily agreed with Vettel’s sentiments, saying Pole position equals the Fastest lap, Not who wins the race!


Thus how does this effect the History Books? As I’d say it simply waters down this Statistical category, and makes it semi-meaningless. Although I suppose you could argue the same thing about the Points structure constantly being tinkered with, but then again does Anybody care how many points a Driver scores during his F1 career?


Lastly, I’m a tad Bitamyte’ Dismayed over how Nobody in the Media’s willing to say anything Negative about this new, Farcical Qualifying format, as what’s next? Reverse Starting Grids? Lucky Dog Wave-arounds, Joker laps or Sprinklers Ontrack? Oh Never Mind!


Since I had a really good Chuckle over 1996 F1 World Champion Damon Hill’s Quip about how there had been More Action during lap 1 of Sunday’s British Grand Prix then during the Entire Sprint (Qualifying) Race during the ensuing Ref Flag after Lewis Hamilton Punted Max Verstappen!


As C’mon Gory Liberty Media, Quit Mucking Up the Sport!