Tuesday, July 10, 2018

AUTOS: Deloreans in Different Guises abound in California...

This Time Capsule Delorean was spotted in "Rocket Rick's" (Mears) Backyard 'O Bakersfield, CA during the "Month of May," 2017 by Blogmeister' Miguel, and isn't the one Jay Leno drove subsequently on his Car Show. (the Tomaso Collection)
As one's a Movie Car replica, and the other's Bone Stock.

Rolling On, as I typically do here in Nofendersville. I broke thou story into 2 Part Harmony, since I thought it would be too long otherwise.

As this nebulous Back to The Future Delorean theme began for Mwah upon making my first-ever trip to Fresno, CA earlier this year. Which I've already regaled Yuhs in another long-form Tomaso tome previously.

A Day 'O Comedies
The Shuttle Express Driver showed up nearly 15mins early, and told me to take my time. I'm in the black Escalade, parked on the side of the building. To which I told him I'm Blind! Ok, I'm outside Sir.

Went outside and Nobody but Yeahooz' living here in my compound were just driving back 'n  forth in the parking lot. So I called Shuttle Express, said I'm Cornfuzed. I ordered a Share Van Ride, and my driver sez' he's outside in a black Escalade but I DON'T SEE him! One moment please.

Ok Tomaso, yes, we've upgraded you to your own (VIP) personal Town Car at NO extra charge, and he'll take you directly to the airport... Ok, but I still cannot S-E-E him! One moment please...

Next, when checking in at Curbside for United Airlines, as I'm 100% positive it was the same employee as last time, who told me exactly same  thingy' when asking for Assistance all the way thru to my final leg's destination. Sorry Sir, but you'll have to ask at the gate. My computer cannot talk to theirs... WTF!

Was seated at my gate 3hrs before departure, and the woman "Handler" (assistant_ who took me by wheelchair, basically just Dumped me in the nearest seat in the waiting area and Skedaddled.

As it's becoming most entertaining having to Prod my way thru the crowd queuing up to walk down the Gangplank! When they make the "Courtesy" announcement for Disabled persons to get Thar ARSE up front El Pronto! Giving Yuhs may be 2mins if you're lucky?

And that's if I can even find I-T? Where we're supposed to Board without Whacking Anybody with my White Cane; Whack-Whack, coming thru; Hya! As typically these days, I just have to find somebody standing in the way and ask which way to the gate?

Next, I stopped at the check-in & said I need to get assistance All the way thru to Fresno, via Los Angeles. And really didn't care if I was holding up boarding since the Airlines are RETARDED these Days!

But Jokes on Mwah, since although I enjoyed having had Claudio reserve me AN aisle seat directly next to the bathroom, nearly the VERY last row of our Aeroplane. Naturally we hit turbulence, being told to return to our seats 'N buckle up immediately after the flight Attendant had escorted me into the loo; CRIKEYS! As won't G-O into details 'bout a Blind person trying to use the bathroom in a rocking  Aeroplane; Whoa Nelie!

Then the man seated next to me, who was also flying to Fresno, told me how he'd made this trip multiple times. Informing Mwah how we'd actually be flying south past Fresno to get to LA before flying back north again upon a Puddle Jumper; SWELL!

Claus was a very friendly Chap who ended up assisting me down the Jet-way in Los Angeles (LAX) since they seemed short staffed. And it was a tiny Aeroplane, smacking my Head on the stowage bin, and hearing something go crunch when trying to shove my backpack in it; SHEISA!

So naturally the Flight Attendant ARSE-Sumed we were flying together, even though he was a row behind me, and I had to ask her on her second pass thru for "A Cookie;" Err cup 'O water, as she said she didn't hear me...

When I'd tried asking repeatedly if she was talking to me? When passing thru the Darkened Cabin on her initial Walk-thru. Since this is a fairly common occurrence with Flight Attendants whom don't seem to grasp the difficulties of being Blind in a Dark Aeroplane!

Notice how I'm NOT even bringing up trying to eat in the Dark in miniscule seats with crying, kicking Baby's seated next to Mwah in the; Oh Never Mind!

Then the funniest part was when I was finally assisted off the "Puddle Jumper." As for reasons unknown, United decided to leave my suitcase I'd paid the FREAKIN' $25 check luggage fee for in Los Angeles; URGH!

As do NOT even get me started on the sheer MADNESS thou Airlines cause me every single Stinkin' time I'm waiting to Board and hear the now Obligatory announcement of stowing Bags FREE 'o Charge to your final Destination due to their NOT being enough Stowage Bins...

Meanwhile, Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen waited outside in her own "Holding Pattern," circling round 'N round with two Doggies, as my Airport Assistant gamely tried locating our unknown to us missing suitcase!

As the two Hoonds' Mary Ellen was traveling with were the epitome 'O "Mutt 'N Jeff;" Hya!  With the one she's Babysitting named Silk, is basically Marmaduke! And weighs 100lbs, with people constantly asking her if he's part Great Dane? For which Mary Ellen sez' she believes Silk's breed is actually American Field Labrador Retriever, for which I've never heard of before.

Whilst the other's been prominently featured on thou Award Winning pages 'O No Fenders. First as thou Pixolator, but now goes by Pixie-the-Wonderdog; WUF-WUF! As this precocious Chihuahua weighs in at a scale tipping 9lbs Soaking Wet! But I digress...

We elected to return the next day to pick up my suitcase, since Mary Ellen had errands to run in Fresno & didn't want to sit round waiting all day for a suitcase delivery - "Entertaining" Mwah. So that's how I started this ultimately wonderful Mad-Cap trip.

Frolicking in Fresno...
We spent Monday bopping round "Downtown" Fresno running errands before finally returning to the airport to retrieve my suitcase, since United Airlines thought the bag I'd paid $25.00 should spend the night in La-La Land; Oh Never Mind!

We then drove back to Fresno to our friends Jon & Elisa's house for a very enjoyable evening's dinner;
Where I also met Mary Ellen's longtime friend Susan for the first time.

Coolest part for Mwah is that Jon's a Car Dude! And has a Factory Five Cobra replicar he built in the garage.

After dinner, we gravitated out to the garage where Jon obligingly Started it up with the garage door opened, having previously warned me about how LOUD I-T IS! Before it immediately SNARLED to life, as he's running straight exhaust pipes off the side of car - underneath the doors in classic Cobra Racecar style: TURN I-T OFF!


Next up was his Delorean, which he asked me if I wanted to sit in the driver's seat? Uh Duh, Dude! As I immediately moved toward the car's Gull-wing Door, with Jon warning me to watch my Noggin'

For which I immediately noted to Thyself how the Car's extremely low, and very tight fitting for Mwah. As I had my winter Hiking Boots on and promptly got 'em stuck underneath the pedals; Aye Karumba!

As John said it's a 5-speed and feel free to shift the gears. But I elected not to, since the pedal's, where's thou clutch? As my feet were still stuck behind the pedals... Got it, Which were so damn tiny! That I elected to refrain from doing this while enjoying my time behind the wheel.

But I just had to ask John into starting his Delorean for Mwah, since I'd never heard one before in real life. Which reluctantly fired after cranking a few times, since it had been sitting un-started awhile in a cold garage.

And unfortunately it was raining the whole day & night of our visit, so NO rides in either the Cobra or Delorean. Which I'd have opted for the latter, since I've never ridden in a "Movie Car;" Hya!

Jon's Daily Driver is a Fiat 500 Abarth turbo, which he also fired up for Mwah, outside. Along with telling me to run my hands over all three cars, before Jon blipped the Fiat's throttle several times for my amusement.

Returning inside, we watched John & Elisa's wedding video from the past Summer, along with John having Elisa drive the Cobra to the beach, also in the video, where he proposed.


Back to The Future...
Returning Full Circle, figuratively, I broke down the first week of June to watch my first episode of Jay Leno's Garage TV Show this year, since when scrolling thru my Zapp2It TV Guide, I'd discovered that part of the June 7th episode titled One of A kind featured a Back to The Future Delorean replicar; so I had to watch; Err listen!

As Jay met some Nerdly "geek" at the famed Gable House in Pasadena, CA, which Leno casually says is the house featured in the movie. As I've got ZERO Clue who this other Chris Dude was?

And whilst I won't give away how they both felt about the Delorean's driving characteristics. I'm totally Blown Away learning that this car, replete with pieces of the original movie car is claimed to be worth $750k!


While Y'all can check out the video I've subsequently found on Ye Net, from the very same American Pickers episode I so labouriously chronicled previously, which kept my Delorean euphoria alight after sampling my first Stainless Steel wonder in Fresno...

(Photo c/o No Fenders Blogmeister' Miguel)