Monday, November 4, 2013

What's Really going on at Lotus F1 these Days?


So naturally, in this world of Political Correctness, along with not wishing to upset anybody's ears  or  heavens forbid, let the kids hear some foul mouthery on thee 'Telie, we weren't privy to thee Iceman's heated conversation with Lotus F1 trackside manager Alan Permane in India where Permane famously told Kimi to get out of the *FUCKING* way! In regards to letting his fast approaching junior teammate Romain Grosjean to overtake him, since after all Grosjean "was FASTER than Raikkonen; Can you confirm that Kimi!" As the Frenchman went onto an impressive third place finish while thee 'Kimster dropped down to an eventual seventh place upon his utterly worn Pirelli rubber...


Yet the funniest portion of this whole tit-for-tat affair between Lotus F1 and Raikkonen is the proposed intrigue over Kimi's angst towards the team and unexpectedly not showing up for Thursday's obligatory PR demands in Abu Dhabi - for which the Finn is notorious for not being keen over.

Yet according to thy 'Wee Willie Buxom (Will Buxton) Kimi was never expected by the team to show up on Thursday, due to a well placed team source and henceforth, allegedly Lotus is milking all of the PR it can from the matter, obviously trying to spin I-T positively in their favour, naturally...


Thus one has to ask themselves, is this simply A-L-L just theatre in order to keep Lotus F1 in the press spotlight? As rumours abound over Lotuses continuing financial concerns, since reportedly Kimi has received ZERO Euros this year whilst propelling the team to amazing heights - still mathematically alive for runner-up in this year's vaunted Constructor's cup which Professor (Steve) Matchett likes to bang on about constantly...

As the team is still hopeful of finalizing its minority shareholding stake purchase by the Quantum Motorsports group which would allow the signing of thee Incredible Hulkster, nee Nico Hulkenberg to the vacant Lotus seat in 2014 over Pastor Maldonado's countless Venezuelan PDVSA millions...


All of which may be mute by the time I've posted this? As possibly there'll be some sort of public announcements over the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix weekend? As I'd personally prefer Hulkenberg to join Lotus F1 over the "Chequers-or-Wreckers" Maldonado... I mean if Messer Permane was infuriated over Kimi's antics of holding up Grosjean, then how will he and the team get on with Pastor who threw a nasty block upon Team Willy teammate Valtteri Bottas when trying to Turf him off this year during qualifying at India I believe! Or was it Korea? As the last three races all bleed together for Mwah... (Not to mention becoming overly distracted by Seb' Vettel's mockery of the Formula 1 grid at the moment whilst I've got my balls in the wading pool; Hya!) As I definitely think it was actually Korea...

Yet surely there's some rancor between the departing Raikkonen and Lotus F1, as its pretty amazing that Kimi's driven the whole year without being paid, (his rumoured $15-million Euros) yet currently lies third in the driver's standings - as perhaps he was simply looking out for himself in India since after all his contract is heavily bonus laden, which I'd ARSE-sume has something to do with being paid per points scored which is an old contract ploy used by Formula 1 teams, as it gives an incentive to the driver whilst obviously helping the team out championship wise and thus ultimately I guess Gerald Lopez just needs to pay up, eh? Or just get out of the F%%KING Way; Hya! As its hard to believe Kimi will actually skip the US and Brazilian GP's...

Raikkonen angry with Lotus over lack of Pay

As hopefully the Lotus F1 team can continue its impressive march towards the front of the grid with two strong, hungry competitive drivers, nee Grosjean & Hulkenberg  next year, while the verdict's still out on whether or not Lotus can give them the chassis to do the job with in 2014?

But seriously? Does Lotus want to take Pay Driver Maldonado over Hulkenberg? As I'd say that Nico's got the upper hand upon Pastor, although both have won the coveted GP2 title, Hulkenberg's also won the long forgotten A1GP crown, not to mention having qualified in the Top-10 Q3 'Qualie session five of the last six races; along with being the meet in the Lotus F1 sandwich in Abu Dhabi this past weekend, (during qualifying) with Kimi on top and Romain Grosjean on the bottom Ooh la la Mon Cherie! Also having BEATEN both "Works" Scuderia Ferrari drivers Felipe Massa (P8) and "Fredrico Suave," aka Fred Alonso who qualified an uncharacteristic P11, failing to make Q3 for the first time since Valencia, 2012!

And while one might argue the current plight of Team Willy's chassis woes, let's not forget that Williams Grand Prix has won the second most Constructor's titles (9) vs. Sauber who's never won one, not to mention having always been a Customer team and thus, perhaps the most logical move will see Maldonado fill Hulkenberg's vacated Sauber seat next year instead? As surely the Venezuelan Oil money would be welcome there - letting 17-year old 'Rooskie F1 saviour Sergey Sirotkin toil next year as a junior "simulator Jockey" before making his leap into Formula 1, since after all, I believe he still lacks the necessary FIA Superlicence...

And it now appears that good news has finally come for Lotus, Raikkonen, Hulkenberg and all involved; having first read about this from Grizzled 'Journo Joe Saward late sunday night after the Abu Dhabi GP...

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