So what can I say that Y’all don’t already know, as I spent
the majority of last Sunday inside straining to S-E-E anythingy of substance
onscreen whilst staring mightly at thee ‘Telie when first watching the live
broadcast of the Pocono IndyCar race and then after lunch watching the tape of
the German Grand Prix at Der Nurburgring, which holds fond memories for Mwah,
since attending I-T ‘Wayback in Twenty-oh-Two; Ja-Ja, indeedy!
And wasn’t that done much better this time ‘round Mates, as
we all were informed ahead of time of the race being on CNBC - which I had to
look up in my TV guide to see if I had I-T? Which thankfully I do, especially
since comca$t just once again INCREASED my monthly bill another $2.25, a 3%
increase; SHEISA! (Like everybody got a 3% raise this year, right?) As Formula
1 has been moved the past two weeks since thy Tour de Farce bicycle race is far
more important; Err incurs higher commercial revenues, eh?
Thus, NO SCREAMING at Leigh Diffey ‘N
NBCSN this time, and GASP! Even ABC managed to plug the upcoming Toronto IndyCar race three
times vs. two Doublewide ‘RASSCAR plugs!
Didn’t have a chance to listen to Pocono qualifying via IMS
Radio Network since I was Out ‘N Aboot, so I
didn’t get to hear Dario Franchitti tell his crew over the radio: “This is
Embarrassing!” After qualifying 20th, whilst his teammates Scott
Dixon wound-up P17 with surprisingly their “Junior Birdman” Charlie Kimball
being the fastest Target-mobile with his twelfth place effort. As the
‘Cheepster’s arch nemesis Roger Penske’s Boyz would roll off fourth and sixth,
Will Power starting ahead of Helio Castroneves, while it was an all Andretti
Autosport affair upon the front row with Marco Andretti claiming Pole ahead of
teammates Ryan Hunter-Reay and James Hinchcliffe respectively.
But the driver I was most interested about was Ryan Briscoe
who was pulling double duty this weekend by shuttling between Lime Rock Park
Raceway in Connecticut for the American Le Mans Series race, where he claimed
his first Sports Car Pole position for the LMP2 class before racing to victory on
Saturday and then originally intending to start dead last in the B-I-G CARZ at
thee “Tricky Triangle” Sunday as part of the Panther Racing substitute drivers
Merry-go-round...
As Briscoe would ultimately roll off P19 after a flurry of
‘Honder lumps being changed, most notably for the two Target boyz Dixon &
Franchitti - both incurring 10-spot grid penalties...
Late Saturday afternoon I watched my tape of ‘Qualie from
Der Nurburgring, which was a bit bizarre for Mwah rootin’ against thee TWINKIE
BOY, aka ‘Seb Vettel, who’s become my current Bad Boy of F1 and hence I was
hoping for Lewis Hamilton to spoil Vettel’s party as its shocking to think that
it was the first Pole position at the “Ring” for a Mercedes since El Maestro
Juan Fangio Manuel did so in 1954 aboard a Silver Arrows chassis at the mighty Nordschleife, better
known as the Green Hella! Where Mercedes entered four of its all conquering
W196’s which interestingly, German driver Karl
Kling ignored Team orders and passed leader Fangio before
ultimately finishing fourth, with Fangio winning the race ahead of two Ferrari’s,
with the second place car being co-driven by “El
Cabezón” (José Froilán
González) and future World Champion Mike Hawthorn, while the
podium’s final step went to Maurice
Trintignant.
Ironically, earlier that morning I read two stories in the
New York Times about the vaunted W196 of which a lone example is set to go on
the auction block shortly, no less being a Fangio driven chassis, which even
more ironically won the ’54 German GP and most likely will set A New Auction
Record for price, while there are some ten remaining examples in existence, one
of which resides at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway’s Hall of Fame museum...
A Singular Mercedes Aims for AnotherRecord
While I also enjoyed the story about ‘Journo Leo Levine
accidently buzzing this very same chassis to 10,200RPM’s after having been
given a very strict 7,500RPM limit, having buzzed the engine due to its reverse
shifting pattern; OOPS!
A Drive of a Lifetime, Nearly Ending inMechanical Mayhem
Thus the most shocking part about qualifying for the German
GP was the horrendous Foopah Mercedes made by sitting thee Great Nico (Rosberg)
during the Q2 ‘Qualie session thinking his time was safe only to see last
week’s winner relegated to starting completely Dumbfounded in P11! While I’ve
already alluded to Hamilton taking the Pole ahead of Vettel with teammate Mark
Webber P3; while I really couldn’t make out much of anythingy during the Pocono
race, which they claimed had a great turnout, which I hope is true, since it’s
a very unique track and seems to race pretty good, albeit I’m sure that thee
Mayor ‘O Hinchtown has mixed feelings after smacking the wall on lap-1; OOFTAH!
While I cannot say that I really felt too bad for Marco
Andretti as the Cheepster’s Boyz proved that the Tortoise is usually “faster”
than the Hare, (Rabbit) as Marco’s most laps led of 88 was for naught after
finishing tenth and running out of fuel at the end of the race, while Chip
Ganassi celebrated his first ever podium sweep with Dixon leading Kimball and
Franchitti home to Ganassi longtime sponsor Target’s 100th IndyCar
victory, which was also Honda’s 200th IndyCar victory. As Honda
swept four of the Top-5 finishing spots, with Penske’s Will Power finishing
where he started in his Chevy followed home by SFHR’s Joseph Newgarden, who
started from 15th, while Briscoe soldiered home in 14th.
And the absolute Brain Fade moment of the day had to go to
Takuma Sato who out late-braked himself into the pits and rammed an
unsuspecting Hunter-Reay, ultimately ruining both drivers race while AA Team
Owner Mikey Andretti said over the radio: “I saw it with my own eyes, he’s an
IDIOT!”
Meanwhile over in Der Fatherland, a pretty entertaining race
of its own was taking place at the currently Bankrupt Nurburgring circuit, as
the Mighty ‘Merc’s tyre problems resurfaced; NO! Not those exploding tyre
troubles of Silverstone but instead the ones where the Mercedes simply runs off
its rubber and cannot keep pace with the competition, as first Hamilton got
swamped by the Red Bulls and then ultimately worked his way back up to a fifth
place finish.
Yet the most impressive driver of the day was the much
unloved Frenchie Romain Grosjean who
actually chased leader Vettel for quite awhile but simply couldn’t overtake the
German and ultimately was informed that “KIMI IS FASTHER THEN YOU!” Which is a
very well known reference instructing the driver to move over for his teammate;
Ja Volt!
And speaking ‘O teammates, Mark Webber did an amazing job to
recover from his Pitstop where the team totally botched attaching the right
rear wheel, effectively sending him off without I-T attached! As it careened
down Pitlane and struck an unexpecting FOM Cameraman, who thankfully was
unhurt. As Webber was forced to come from 21st to a credible seventh
place finish...
Yet the most BIZZARO incident of the day had to be Jules
Bianchi’s Marussia going KABLAMOE! Or as ‘Hobbo (David Hobbs) exclaimed; that
was a Double Kablamoe! And the ensuing fire was so BRIGHT! That it was one of
the few thingys I could see clearly upon the screen; Aye Karumba! Yet I-T got
even stranger, as the car summarily rolled across the track as Bianchi stood
alongside the corner workers after the fire had been extinguished, resulting in
an extremely long Safety Car period...
And like the Silverstone race preceding it, would the
outcome have been different if the race had lasted a further lap? As even
eventual winner Vettel said over the radio on his cool down lap that was a Hard
One today, they really pushed me! In regards to Raikkonen’s late race blitz to
less than one second behind at the stripe with teammate Grosjean finishing third after letting Kimi by to attack
Vettel, who finally won his Home race, the first German to do so since the
great Michael Schumacher did so seven years ago.
Fourth place went to
Fredrico Suave, aka Fred Alonso, who’s Ferrari stopped abruptly after the final
lap to which curiously there wasn’t any explanation for, while as mentioned
earlier, Hamilton somewhat rebounded to round out the Top-5 placings, while the
Birthday Boy ‘Seb Vettel, who just turned 26 notched up his 30th
Grand Prix victory and further widened his points lead. NO word on whether or
not he likes Twinkies; Hya!
And
NOT sure about this, but I found it to be totally new hearing the German
National Anthem being played two weeks in-a-row for two different drivers, a la
Nico Rosberg at Silverstone and then Vettel one week later in Germany, no less!
As I cannot recall that ever happening in the modern F1 era...
