Thursday, July 11, 2013

Moving Targets - Two sets of Different Mountains Climbed...

So what can I say that Y’all don’t already know, as I spent the majority of last Sunday inside straining to S-E-E anythingy of substance onscreen whilst staring mightly at thee ‘Telie when first watching the live broadcast of the Pocono IndyCar race and then after lunch watching the tape of the German Grand Prix at Der Nurburgring, which holds fond memories for Mwah, since attending I-T ‘Wayback in Twenty-oh-Two; Ja-Ja, indeedy!

And wasn’t that done much better this time ‘round Mates, as we all were informed ahead of time of the race being on CNBC - which I had to look up in my TV guide to see if I had I-T? Which thankfully I do, especially since comca$t just once again INCREASED my monthly bill another $2.25, a 3% increase; SHEISA! (Like everybody got a 3% raise this year, right?) As Formula 1 has been moved the past two weeks since thy Tour de Farce bicycle race is far more important; Err incurs higher commercial revenues, eh?

Thus, NO SCREAMING at Leigh Diffey ‘N NBCSN this time, and GASP! Even ABC managed to plug the upcoming Toronto IndyCar race three times vs. two Doublewide ‘RASSCAR plugs!

Didn’t have a chance to listen to Pocono qualifying via IMS Radio Network since I was Out ‘N Aboot, so I didn’t get to hear Dario Franchitti tell his crew over the radio: “This is Embarrassing!” After qualifying 20th, whilst his teammates Scott Dixon wound-up P17 with surprisingly their “Junior Birdman” Charlie Kimball being the fastest Target-mobile with his twelfth place effort. As the ‘Cheepster’s arch nemesis Roger Penske’s Boyz would roll off fourth and sixth, Will Power starting ahead of Helio Castroneves, while it was an all Andretti Autosport affair upon the front row with Marco Andretti claiming Pole ahead of teammates Ryan Hunter-Reay and James Hinchcliffe respectively.

But the driver I was most interested about was Ryan Briscoe who was pulling double duty this weekend by shuttling between Lime Rock Park Raceway in Connecticut for the American Le Mans Series race, where he claimed his first Sports Car Pole position for the LMP2 class before racing to victory on Saturday and then originally intending to start dead last in the B-I-G CARZ at thee “Tricky Triangle” Sunday as part of the Panther Racing substitute drivers Merry-go-round...

As Briscoe would ultimately roll off P19 after a flurry of ‘Honder lumps being changed, most notably for the two Target boyz Dixon & Franchitti - both incurring 10-spot grid penalties...

Late Saturday afternoon I watched my tape of ‘Qualie from Der Nurburgring, which was a bit bizarre for Mwah rootin’ against thee TWINKIE BOY, aka ‘Seb Vettel, who’s become my current Bad Boy of F1 and hence I was hoping for Lewis Hamilton to spoil Vettel’s party as its shocking to think that it was the first Pole position at the “Ring” for a Mercedes since El Maestro Juan Fangio Manuel did so in 1954 aboard a Silver Arrows chassis at the mighty Nordschleife, better known as the Green Hella! Where Mercedes entered four of its all conquering W196’s which interestingly, German driver Karl Kling ignored Team orders and passed leader Fangio before ultimately finishing fourth, with Fangio winning the race ahead of two Ferrari’s, with the second place car being co-driven by “El Cabezón” (José Froilán González) and future World Champion Mike Hawthorn, while the podium’s final step went to Maurice Trintignant.

Ironically, earlier that morning I read two stories in the New York Times about the vaunted W196 of which a lone example is set to go on the auction block shortly, no less being a Fangio driven chassis, which even more ironically won the ’54 German GP and most likely will set A New Auction Record for price, while there are some ten remaining examples in existence, one of which resides at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway’s Hall of Fame museum...

A Singular Mercedes Aims for AnotherRecord

While I also enjoyed the story about ‘Journo Leo Levine accidently buzzing this very same chassis to 10,200RPM’s after having been given a very strict 7,500RPM limit, having buzzed the engine due to its reverse shifting pattern; OOPS!

A Drive of a Lifetime, Nearly Ending inMechanical Mayhem

Thus the most shocking part about qualifying for the German GP was the horrendous Foopah Mercedes made by sitting thee Great Nico (Rosberg) during the Q2 ‘Qualie session thinking his time was safe only to see last week’s winner relegated to starting completely Dumbfounded in P11! While I’ve already alluded to Hamilton taking the Pole ahead of Vettel with teammate Mark Webber P3; while I really couldn’t make out much of anythingy during the Pocono race, which they claimed had a great turnout, which I hope is true, since it’s a very unique track and seems to race pretty good, albeit I’m sure that thee Mayor ‘O Hinchtown has mixed feelings after smacking the wall on lap-1; OOFTAH!

While I cannot say that I really felt too bad for Marco Andretti as the Cheepster’s Boyz proved that the Tortoise is usually “faster” than the Hare, (Rabbit) as Marco’s most laps led of 88 was for naught after finishing tenth and running out of fuel at the end of the race, while Chip Ganassi celebrated his first ever podium sweep with Dixon leading Kimball and Franchitti home to Ganassi longtime sponsor Target’s 100th IndyCar victory, which was also Honda’s 200th IndyCar victory. As Honda swept four of the Top-5 finishing spots, with Penske’s Will Power finishing where he started in his Chevy followed home by SFHR’s Joseph Newgarden, who started from 15th, while Briscoe soldiered home in 14th.

And the absolute Brain Fade moment of the day had to go to Takuma Sato who out late-braked himself into the pits and rammed an unsuspecting Hunter-Reay, ultimately ruining both drivers race while AA Team Owner Mikey Andretti said over the radio: “I saw it with my own eyes, he’s an IDIOT!”

Meanwhile over in Der Fatherland, a pretty entertaining race of its own was taking place at the currently Bankrupt Nurburgring circuit, as the Mighty ‘Merc’s tyre problems resurfaced; NO! Not those exploding tyre troubles of Silverstone but instead the ones where the Mercedes simply runs off its rubber and cannot keep pace with the competition, as first Hamilton got swamped by the Red Bulls and then ultimately worked his way back up to a fifth place finish.

Yet the most impressive driver of the day was the much unloved Frenchie Romain Grosjean who actually chased leader Vettel for quite awhile but simply couldn’t overtake the German and ultimately was informed that “KIMI IS FASTHER THEN YOU!” Which is a very well known reference instructing the driver to move over for his teammate; Ja Volt!

And speaking ‘O teammates, Mark Webber did an amazing job to recover from his Pitstop where the team totally botched attaching the right rear wheel, effectively sending him off without I-T attached! As it careened down Pitlane and struck an unexpecting FOM Cameraman, who thankfully was unhurt. As Webber was forced to come from 21st to a credible seventh place finish...

Yet the most BIZZARO incident of the day had to be Jules Bianchi’s Marussia going KABLAMOE! Or as ‘Hobbo (David Hobbs) exclaimed; that was a Double Kablamoe! And the ensuing fire was so BRIGHT! That it was one of the few thingys I could see clearly upon the screen; Aye Karumba! Yet I-T got even stranger, as the car summarily rolled across the track as Bianchi stood alongside the corner workers after the fire had been extinguished, resulting in an extremely long Safety Car period...

And like the Silverstone race preceding it, would the outcome have been different if the race had lasted a further lap? As even eventual winner Vettel said over the radio on his cool down lap that was a Hard One today, they really pushed me! In regards to Raikkonen’s late race blitz to less than one second behind at the stripe with teammate Grosjean finishing third after letting Kimi by to attack Vettel, who finally won his Home race, the first German to do so since the great Michael Schumacher did so seven years ago.

Fourth place went to Fredrico Suave, aka Fred Alonso, who’s Ferrari stopped abruptly after the final lap to which curiously there wasn’t any explanation for, while as mentioned earlier, Hamilton somewhat rebounded to round out the Top-5 placings, while the Birthday Boy ‘Seb Vettel, who just turned 26 notched up his 30th Grand Prix victory and further widened his points lead. NO word on whether or not he likes Twinkies; Hya!

And NOT sure about this, but I found it to be totally new hearing the German National Anthem being played two weeks in-a-row for two different drivers, a la Nico Rosberg at Silverstone and then Vettel one week later in Germany, no less! As I cannot recall that ever happening in the modern F1 era...

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