Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Mic-Nuggets?

Uhm? Is it just me, err DON’T answer that! But I find it a bit funny that the Washington State Fryers Commission is running ads celebrating their 50 year anniversary during the “Turkey Lurkey” weekend… And it’s a “cute” ad, saying that the chickens aren’t 50yrs old, since those would be some “Tough Birds!” But I digress…

(See what happens when Blogger is experiencing “Technical Difficulties” and won’t let me publish the dag-nabbit story, which I tried doing twice this morning…)


Upon noting that the 2007 Racing season has now finished with the conclusion of the RASSCAR “Chump-pee-onship” weekend… I settled down to watch the chequered flag edition of my favourite racing program, Wind Tunnel with Dave Despain. And "GOLL -LEEEEeee…” They even let their resident Open Wheel soothsayer Robin Miller chime in on the final episode.

As usual, Miller had me cracking’ up in only a matter ‘O moments… As Despain and co-host Mike Joy were laying the RASSCAR angle on thick. With a caller asking Miller why don’t all of dem Open Wheelers have to go to the Richard Petty school ‘O driving performance? Apparently our “boyzs” Carpentier, Hornish Jr. and Villeneuve had a hard time stayin’ outta the way in Homestead…

For a few weeks now Despain has been asking viewers what’s the Biggest Story of the Racing season? And I was surprised to hear the ‘ol Windbag himself correctly point out that it unequivocally has to be the “Stepney Gate” spy scandal…

Thus Despain asked Miller what his biggest story was. To which Robin retorted that the SADDEST story of the year is definitely the mass exit us of Open Wheel drivers to RASSCAR… Saying how it shows how far Open Wheel has fallen when successful drivers are content to go run 35th in France Cup every weekend!

Despain then asked did I hear this right? Your biggest story of the season is Formula 1? It was until this morning when Darrell Waltrip told the truth about RASSCAR SUCKING the life outta Tony Stewart and Kevin Harvick…

My second biggest story is how “The Ronster’s” ARROGANCE COST Lewis Hamilton the World Championship… Making him stay out on track forever and spinning off into the sand trap in China. But that makes me happy, ‘cause Ron Dennis now has to be miserable for the entire winter!

Wait a second, Dennis’s Arrogance cost Hamilton the title? Well they kept telling Ron he’d better pit for tires each lap… And ok, “Jaguar” going crazy on the first lap in Brazil wasn’t Ron’s fault. But, Boo-Hoo-Hoo!” Poor Mr. Dennis… He’s a BAD Guy!

(We’ll pause a moment here for the Ronster. Having to get dem “Kraut’s” to fess up $100 million in Euros, let’s see, that’s ‘bout $45 million in funny money, eh?)

Apparently the humongous gaps in the Champ Car calendar along with pinching ‘O pennies by SPEED not wishing to send Miller Down Under has compelled him to cover “Flat liners?” (NHRA)

Actually this seems to be another sign of the current plight of Open Wheel racing, as Miller stated that Champ Cars TV rating have gotten so bad, that they don’t send anyone to bother covering the races anymore! Yet I do find it hilarious how I’d rather hear Miller reporting on those Nitro burners then the 24/7 continuous DRIBBLE ‘O Roundy-round on the RASSCAR Shoppin’ Network…

Sadly Miller seems to think that the entire focus of Open Wheel Racing wrests upon the shoulders of “The Princess!” Who’d uh thunk-it that the 100lb media darling would become our guiding light?

And it seems like Miller’s gonna be really busy next year, since he’s agreed to not only chauffer ‘ol DW for the next five years, but also “Suitcase” Servia, you know De-Spain’s “brother.” Hopefully SPEED is either going to give Miller a raise or at least pay for his mileage.

But I think my pick for Funniest Story of the Year… Categorically, without a doubt was Miller and Dan “Spike” Wheldon appearing on Wind Tunnel with Miller’s circa ’82 “CHEAP” Ganassi button blatantly affixed to their chest, while Miller told Despain he was just “Showin’ the LUV!”

DON’T forget to vote for Helioe…
Happy Turkey Lurkey Day ‘Y’all!