Monday, July 23, 2012

Modern Day Villans?

Otay, if you listen to ‘R, thee ‘Ol Curmudgeon of Open Wheel Racing... Better known as Robin Miller, then you’ve probably heard his “HATE IS GOOD” more than once on either Speed Centre or Wind Tunnel... As for reasons unknown - probably due to human nature, your humble No Fenders scribe has been known to those willing to let him pontificate over the decades over just who exactly he HATES in Der Motorsporten ‘Vurld Ja-Ja! Primarily of Formula 1 and IndyCar...

Thus I spent the weekend consuming copious grains ‘O sand gorging thyself upon le Telescreen watching all three days of the German Grand Prix and Edmonton’s Indy Car race, along with listening to the ‘Qualie session via ze Internetz...

Thus I spent Saturday being chagrined - thinking I’d been smacked hard upside thee head by the Karmic Whip, as my current top two villain’s threw down upon me, as first it was thy smarmy ‘Juan Fredrico Suave, aka Fernando Alonso snatching pole ahead of local hero Master ‘Zebb in Der Fatherland... As I’ve previously noted Alonso will forever be known to Mwah as “Ferdi-duh-Putz,” as he was rightly christened by Blogmeister Miguel! Which is funny since he’s the only current F1 driver I have any great disdain towards these days.

And whilst I currently harbour angst towards ‘HULIO and “Dashley LePew - my numero uno target ‘O hate in IndyCarz is none other than “BULLY-RAY!” And NO! This angst surfaced prior to his becoming the point’s leader; basically when he first brake-checked Oriel Servia and then got into a heated push ‘N shove match on TV ironically in Edmonton one year ago...


Therefore I wasn’t overly surprised to learn that ‘BullyRay had been given a penalty for unsportsmanlike competition during Friday’s practice session when he ‘Turfed James Jakes off-track and then also apparently told the Englishman who fly’s the Boy Scouts flag he was number-one! Geez Ryan, that’s not very good behaviour upon your part, I mean talk ‘bout setting an example for all of ‘Dem aspiring Scouts, eh?

But Hunter-Reay showed me who’s boss by claiming the pole on Saturday afternoon; SHEISA! As I shut down thee Inter-woods prior to his post ‘Qualie interview - with the only silver lining being he’d need to take a 10-grid spot penalty for an unapproved engine change...

And I typically DON’T think of Grizzled ‘Journo Joe Saward as a villain, having seen him getting his 15 ‘My-nutes ‘O Fame on SPEED during the Jolly Good Hydrofest at Silverstone - when Joe not only made it on to thy ‘Telie, but became a pair of Bookends between another commercial break when Bob Varsha waxed-on about Joe hangin’ out in the Sauber F1 Team’s pits with its top brass, his various media platforms and winning a car. (A Toyota Prius I believe...)

Thus I found myself overly annoyed with Joe’s ‘Wingeing on about needing to be careful of who you trust for your media reports as he’s ‘Juan ‘O the Privileged to not only have Grand Prix Paddock access but actually report on the races live-in-person...

And speaking ‘O TV, typically FOX is my villain de rigour when it comes to F1 broadcasts... But I’d haveda say this year’s solution of hosting the Pre & Post-race segments on SPEED made this usually abysmal block of Grand Prix’s most palatable... Along with not only the Booth Boyz of FOX/SPEED but NBC Sports Network actually reading the entire starting grid line-ups which is most preferred by your visually impaired ‘Vurd Botcherer; Err Hack!

But back to the races, as you can probably guess my feelings of joy over that DAMN Fernando winning again... As CRAP! Alonso’s now won three races this season, as I was hoping ‘JENSE would pull off an upset; guess we all know why Ferrari’s reportedly paying Fredrico $32m per season; CRIKEYS!

And then there was BullyRay instantly causing me to croon WWHAAHHHH-WAAH-WAAH!!! At my television as RHR’s in-car radio was played for everybody’s amusement over him CRYING that Will Power should be given a drive-thru penalty...

As somehow I didn’t even find myself being overly annoyed by ‘HULIO winning Sunday; YIKES! Although I did spend the races latter laps chanting get ‘em ‘Taku! As I can still vividly recall being the ONLY person BOOING him in the grandstands on his thought-to-be victory cool-down lap at Edmonton in 2010... You know when he tried fixing Charles Burns shirt collar, right?

Since in the years past I’d actually mute ALL Castroneves and ‘Princess interviews - although that’s gotta be the most happy I’ve ever seen & listened to him... Although I still say he’s working overtime upon his future ‘RASSCAR Bomber Pilot career, I mean C’mon Helio, who’s your shoe sponsor, eh?

And there Y’all have I-T, a fairly typical Tomaso-rant - as I wonder what original Open Wheel Racing BAD Boy Mr. Chrome Horn thinks about all of this? As somehow I don’t think ‘BullyRay holds a candle compared to Thee Thrill from the West Hill...

‘Weeze miss Yuhs ‘PT!