Monday, June 13, 2022

A Jambalaya of Motor Racing

As Summer solstice’s right round thee Corner…


It’s Funny How we Change over the course of our lifetimes, since when I first began following Motor Racing in earnest Wayback’ in 1986, I was simply consumed by All things Open Wheel, initially Formula 1 before being told about the Indy Cars race at Portland International Raceway by a supervisor, who also was a member of the local Porsche Club. Although Formula 1 was Top Dawg’ for Mwah then.


As I marveled over how inexplicably I found myself “Watching,” Err listening to Baku’s Friday (Free Practice) FP2 session, being the first Formula 1 I’d consumed in over one month, not having “tune In” since that Farcical Faux Monaco GP poundin’ round Miami’s Hard Rock Stadium’s Parking lots!


Although I’m told that Miami had something Monaco doesn’t, that being the bevy ‘O Mermaids Suntanning” themselves upon the Hot Rocks jutting the Ash-fault pavement adorning that Lake Miami which featured No Water, Psyche!


Thus I found it weird listening to Kroftie’, aka David Kroft prattle on about potential 2023 F1 Driver moves, Huh? As it Ain’t even Summer yet! Yet the traditional (Fathers Day weekend) running of Le Mans Always makes me think of How we’ve already reached Summer’s Zenith…


And although I was paying much Attenzione to Circuit de la Sarthe over the weekend, I found myself musing how Le Mans and Road America were both renown for their Camping! Whilst it was Great Hearing, Err reading that Mrs. Oilpressure had finally  escaped the confines of Her Hospital Bed for the Greener Pastures of Road America this past weekend!


As it was entertaining reading how Romain Grosjean had told Kevin Lee He’d rather Go for the Brat versus being a Cheesehead, since He wasn’t a Fan of Wisconsin Cheese. But I was more interested Hearing Romain say that Road America reminded Him of thee Mighty Spa’, aka Spa Francorchamps, which are arguably two of the world’s Best Racetracks!


While I know both circuits are also known for the wafting fragrences of many Campfires and Cooking, as Colton Herta’s comments are typical of both venues. As Herta mused in a taped recording during the IndyCarr Radio Network’s race Broadcast how much He enjoyed being able to smell Sausages and Bacon being Cooked on the Back Straight of Road America…


But back to the racing, as I have to say I was left feeling quite Deflated, since Alexander Rossi seemed to just Fade after having been Beaten Out of the Pits during the first Pit Stop by eventual race winner Josef Newgarden. As Rossi just seemed never able to recover, and then on the race’s final restart, Marcus Ericsson passed Rossi who was frantically trying to keep pace with Newgarden, seeing Rossi finish a Dejected third.


As it was a fairly entertaining race, with All of the multiple race (tyre) strategies, while the five Full course Cautions tended to make the race feel somewhat Disjointed. Which led me coming up with a new nickname for Devlin DeFrancesco, calling Him de CrashFesto’ after His run-in with Will Power, Youch!


Although I suppose we should have been expecting some Mayhem after the Indy Lights race was Red Flagged for Christian vogel having launched Himself off the Turn 5 Kerbing and taking out some 80-feet of Catch Fencing, Aye Karumba! Causing the remaining 11 laps of the race to be run following the IndyCar race’s conclusion.


And know it’s nothing to write Home about, but Kudos to Beth Paretta, Her Paretta Autosport Squad and Simona de Silvestro for finishing 21st after starting last in Her first Twisties’ (Road Course) IndyCar race in seven years!


And although I did “Watch,” Err listen to some 10 Hours of le 24 Heurs du Mans, beginning on my Telie’s Motortrend TV channel, I left for IndyCar Qualifying from Elkhart Lake before finally listening in earnest to some seven Hours via Radio Le Mans on Ye Intrawoods’, nee Internet before calling it a night.


As I seemed to notice that very little was said overall about the Toyota’s playing Leapfrog with each other, other then noting who was leading. But Shea Adam’s being more intrigued by some Big Red Button in the Toyota’s Pits that could remotely “Send” the Cars spoke volumes over how Dull of a race for the Overall victory was!


Since I Didn’t even bother getting up early for the finish. Or checking the results until late Sunday evening, following the replay of the F1 race. Since I was awaiting the Encore Presentation of the Azerbaijan Grand Prix with the Mothers Shoe Polish lady, and Didn’t want to accidently find out the results.


Which once again, the Clowns at ESPN were playing more Games! Since the replay magically shifted from starting at 4PM to 7:30PM Pacific upon checking my Zap-2-It’ TV Guide again following the conclusion of the Indy Lights race! And then ESPNews “Scared” Me again, since when tuning in around 7:20PM Pacific, instead of some UFC/MMA Super Highlights Show, they were showing a College Baseball Game and I thought Here We Go Again…


But they cut to F1 at 7:28PM and Wallah, “It’s lights Outs” in Azerbaijan! As cannot say it was a great race, or even worth waiting until 7:30PM Pacific to “Watch,” but it also wasn’t Boring either.


As you had to “Feel” for Ferrari which saw both cars retire. With Carlos Sainz Jr. having a Hydraulics issue and Charles Leclerc’s PU (Power Unit) going Kablamoe spectacularly while leading! As the High track tempuratures apparently weren’t kind to Ferrari powered cars, since Alfa Romeo’s GuanYu Zhou and Haas’s Kevin Magnussen both also had to retire due to PU issues…


Meanwhile the Mercedes were still suffering from their massive Porpoising issues, with Lewis Hamilton needing assistance getting out of his car afterwards and complaining of lower Back Pain, whilst Toto Wolff apologized for giving him a Shitbox car! Even though Mercedes finished 3-4 with George Russell leading Hamilton again.


While DannyRic’, aka Daniel Ricciardo mentioned how His Head felt like a Basketball being Bounced low continuously after the race, saying now He understands what the Silver Arrows Boyz’ are complaining about!


But it was pretty Dull over how Max Verstappen put a total Beatdown upon the field, cruising home some 15+ seconds ahead of a Dejected Sergio Perez, even with Red Bull having told Max to not use His DRS in the closing portion of the race. As it was another 1-2 for Red Bull who are now on a tear. As I still Don’t know if Perez’s tyre problems were real? Since I really Hate Team Orders in F1!


Although the most entertaining portion was the Kerfuffle between the two McLaren Drivers with Lando Norris Whining Ah-Mighty for His team to tell Ricciardo He’s Faster then You! Before Norris was told to Hold Station with five laps remaining, before we were left pondering if Norris was gonna Pull a Didier Pironi on the final lap? Before Picciardo finished ahead of Norris with the McLaren duo finishing P8-9 respectively.


Meanwhile I wasn’t surprised to learn that the No. 8 Toyota was victorious over it’s Sister No. 7, which apparently Dropped to second after a sensor issue with it’s front Hybrid system delayed it momentarily during Hour 16. As Sebastian Beumi, Brendon Hartley and Ryo Hirakawa won Toyota’s fifth consecutive Le Mans 24 Hours race, Yawn! With the #709’s Ryan Briscoe, Richard Westbrook and Frank Mellaux standing on the Podium’s third step for Scuderia Glickenhaus.