Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Formula One's Sour-Patch Kids...

The Kid's Are Alright, but is Formula 1's New McManagement?

I mean, I've already got nicknames for two-thirds of the leadership team. Chevy Chase, Brickity Bratches and Ross Brawn. Whilst all we need now is thar dog Fido; Err Spot. As hopefully the new cars won't look like Abominations 'O Chitty-Chitty Bang-Bang!

Although I must confess, that I've shamelessly borrowed the Chevy Chase moniker from Joe Saward...

By now, Y'all have heard 'bout Liberty Media's newest Formula 1 wrinkle, replacing those Nasty, Ooh la-la F1 Grid Girl Tarts with Kids, in the face of today's modern world. Which ironically they've apparently pilfered thou idea from another racing series known as Formula E.

Yet who are we, especially Men, i.e.; the esteemed new mouthpiece 'O Formula 1''s revered "Chevy Chase" (Chase Carey) to be deciding what Women in Sport or on a whole feel about reversing this tradition?

As Kudos to Susan for putting into perspective what a modern day female thinks about this matter so eloquently...

Meanwhile, in the immortal words of Alanis Morissette: "Isn't It Ironic?" That thou mustachioed Chase Carey would be raising eyebrows by twisting words upon his upper lip's Hairpiece, by proclaiming just days later; If it was up to Him, He'd have Kept Grid Girls...

As Grizzled Journo' Joe Saward's already been "Johnny On-the-Spot" pointing out how Liberty Media, Formula One's owners, who also have a controlling interest in the MLB Atlanta Braves, who Uhm, Oh Yeah use Cheerleaders.

While lookee Thar', Who'd Ah-Thunk IT? Both the North Korean's & South Korean's had Cheerleading Squads at the Olympic Games. And How Dare those South Korean Cheerleaders brazenly wear Mini Skirts; Oh My Freakin' Gawd! AIN'T that so Degrading; Err, Uhm? American...

Not to mention, and may be I'm taking it a tad extreme? But isn't Carey's words about Pretty Girls Sexist? Not to mention thou irony that Carey formerly worked for some Media Mogul's television network FOX, that's renowned for its blatant Sexism practices...

As I'm not sure why, but my Head's been screaming for days now, that this Bamboozled; Err boggled change to F1 has NOTHING' to Do with the plight of Grid Girls, or that Liberty Media cares. Especially since Mr. Carey cannot backup his typically grandiose claims with any valid numbers...

but instead, Liberty's simply trying to seed the future market of the Sport by using, Uhm, enticing youngsters to embrace Formula 1 and become Addicted to it like I did some three decades ago! So why all of the Chicanery, Flash Bangs & Smoke 'N Mirrors Liberty Media?

As perhaps it would behoove Formula One's Brain-trust to ponder thou words of a past, popular Rock Band, Eh?

"We just heard of a brand new wave
And we heard it's here to stay
We'll have to wait and see if it's half of what they say
We heard he opened up a brand new door
Well you know that's what I'm lookin' for
We'll have to wait and see if it makes you scream for more

The kid is hot tonight
Whoa, so hot tonight
But where will he be tomorrow?

And we just heard of a brand new fad
And they say it's gonna drive you mad
We'll have to wait and see if it's the best you ever had..."

The kid is hot tonight
Whoa, so hot tonight
But where will he be tomorrow?"

Partial Song lyrics from: Loverboy
Song: The Kid is Hot Tonight
Album: Loverboy
Year: 1981