Tuesday, October 6, 2020

F1: The Night ESPN2 Double Faulted at Flushing Meadows

Huh? I thought the Women's W Series was Suspended this year?

Congratulation luh Duesh! Once again you Showed your True Colours! After I'd spent the whole day in my own virtual "bubble," making sure to not open any websites, listen to any Sports News or even turn on Thy Telie, in case of stumblin' across an errant update giving me the results of the Italian Grand Prix I was eagerly awaiting after having been told earlier in thou morning to make sure i definitely watched it!

Yet for Mwah, the Saddest part of it All, was my correctly predicting that ESPN2 would Screw Us Devoted Formula 1 Fans once again! As I was totally suspicious when learning that Gory Tennis was scheduled for 4hrs preceding the listed Encore Presentation of the Italian Grand Prix from 8-10:30PM Pacific.

After all, the week before I'd fallen asleep after Ah-Waitin' a Stupendous One Hour 25mins Delay for the Stinkin' (MLB) Baseball game to finish saw the Belgian Grand Prix Encore Presentation beginning at 8:25 Pacific!

And after the myriad 'O the Mothers Shoe Polish lady Cooing Sweetly we'll return exactly where we left off immediately following these riveting Glow in The Dark $19.95 Helicopter Commercials, Sigh!

With Golden Child', nee Lewis Hamilton's serene saunter into thou Sunset, continuously stretching his lead with ease at the Mighty Spa Francorchamps put me into a Sleep induced State and I simply Switched Off instead, perhaps only two-thirds of the race's distance?

Turning on Thy Telie 15 minutes before the F1 Replay in Questione was slated to begin, I was relieved to hear that the Min's Tennis match had ended and they were interviewing the winner with several minutes to spare before the top of the hour.

But then it got Weird! As Chrissie Evert and some other Talking Head began prattling on 'bout the upcoming Women's tennis match late night at Flushing Meadows, Huh? And then they interviewed the two female contestants in the Prime Time Pre-amble; WTF?

As Yeah, we Won't get, Uhm Fooled? Oh Never Mind! As luh Duesh' did I-T Again BASTARDOES! And not only Double Faulted by airing the Naomi Osaka match, but presumably caused scores of Formula 1 Fans to Turn Off their Televisions Fuming!

And feeling that ESPN2 should be Disqualified a la Novak Djokovic Had been earlier that day for Stupidly Hitting a line Marshall with a Defiant tennis ball lob after losing! And now fined $10k for his Sophomoric Antics.

Especially since this year's Italian Grand Prix will most likely end up being my choice for Formula One's Race of The year! Even if I Didn't get to watch it.

And with No Disrespect towards Monsieur Gasley, I'd really like to know who was the Bloke on the Pit Wall that called him in on lap-19, just One lap prior to Kevin Bacon' Magnussen's Safety Car inducing accident...

As every Stinkin' story I've read/listened to via my NFB Newsline for The Blind's telephone service or the Internet, since Mary Ellen sez' I sound Silly saying Internets so easily! And Nobody get's that Circa 2000's Joke Anymore; But I Digress...

Nothing ever truly explained how Gasley went from P10, including ironically going Argie-Bargie' with his Red Bull replacement Alexander Albon at the start! To resuming the race after the Red Flag in third place, as how many cars did he Jump during the Safety Car period?

But Hats Off to Pierre, who after all is the former 2016 GP2 Champion, Err now FIA Formula 2 Champion, being the final GP2 Champion before the series rebranding in 2017.

Gasley's also finished as series runner-up in the 2014 Formula Renault 3.5 Series Championship, ironically behind then another Red Bull Junior Driver named Carlos Sainz, Jr. And the 2017 Super Formula Championship, the latter I wished to mention briefly because of another Super formula graduate named Alex Palou, now contesting his rookie IndyCar season for Dale Coyne Racing with Team Goh, but this story's supposed to be about Monsieur Gasley Wee-Wee, Bon Appétit!

As its most certainly ironic that Scuderia AlphaTauri's Debutante Grand Prix comes at Monza, Home race of the Fienza based F1 Squad.

Who's only other Grands Prix victory occurred also at Monza twelve years ago, when a Fresh Faced Driver I call 'lil syd viddle', aka Sebastian Vettel claimed his and then Scuderia Toro Rosso's maiden victory at what's called The Temple of Speed! Aka Autodromo Nazionali Monza.

Also think it was The Guardian's Giles Richard reporting that this was the first F1 Podium since Hungary, 2012 to not have a single member of Mercedes, Ferrari or Red Bull on the podium, Yikes!

Not to mention being the first French Grand Prix winner since Olivier Panis's Shock Win in Thee Principality, nee Monte Carlo when he won the 1996 Monaco Grand Prix.

So Congrats Pierre Gasley, you Deserve It! And at only age 24, the question now must be will he ever win another Grands Prix in his budding Formula 1 career?

Pierre Gasley secures Maiden Grand Prix Victory in Accident plagued Italian Grand Prix