Here’s Flavio

Danny Bridges;
“When Paul McCartney wrote money can't buy me love, HE WAS WRONG…”

In the wake of last weeks horrible news regarding the death of Renault R & D Engineer William Miller, I thought a little good news was warranted for the Enstone based Formula 1 outfit, a.k.a. Renault F1.

And why yes, I know that this is a little dated… But nevertheless Indiana Bureau Chief Danny B sent me the following story about F1’s prima Donna Playboy, a.k.a. Flavour Flav (Flavio Briatore) getting married to 28 year-old Italian Super model Elisabetta Gregoraci...

Be careful Flav, Sir Maxxum may have somme-thun to say ‘bout being Top Cheese in the Playboy department, eh? Although Flavio isn’t immune to having the “Beauty’s” tripping all over him as his past includes trysts with Naomi Campbell, Adriana Volpe and Heidi Klum, whom had his daughter, Helene "Leni" Klum in May, 2004, but according to Klum; “Flav is not involved in the child's life.” Aye Karumba…

Reports claim that the newlyweds were chauffeured to and from the wedding chapel by none other than Double World Champion Fredrico Suave. (F. Alonso) Of which immediately made me flash back to when some Seven Time World Champion pulled chauffeuring duties for one of the Scuderia’s heavyweights… As in Michael Schumacher donning tuxedo and cap for Luca di Montezemolo... To which I can only say; Yo, Flavour Flay, you’r NO Luca di Montezemolo. So get over it!

Renault F1 internship

The following information was previously sent to the No Fenders mailbox and although I’ve never heard of the Altran Engineering Academy, they sound like a very interesting outfit who are offering a once in a lifetime opportunity, which sounds absolutely fantastic to me! I only wish that they had something similar for aspiring scribes like your humble servant, eh? Here’s the skinny…

Altran - ING Renault F1 Team technological partnership
How do we respond to changes in engine regulations; how do we improve the chassis’ aerodynamic performance? High-level expertise is required in so many different fields. Altran has been supporting the Renault F1 Team since 2002, providing talented engineers in a variety of specialities, including computation, information technology, electronics, logistics and quality control. They contribute their skills to chassis in Enstone, UK, and to engines in Viry-Châtillon, near Paris. The Altran experts are driven not only by the human and sporting adventure, but by the technological challenge as well. Earlier this year, the partnership was extended to the end of 2010.

Thus, in it’s partnership with ING Renault F1 Team, Altran has just launched the 5th issue of the Altran Engineering Academy.

Like the four young champions who came before, the future winner of the Altran Engineering Academy will join the R&D department of the ING Renault F1 Team in September 2008 for a six-month internship. Before that happens, the winner will go through a rigorous selection process, from submitting an application (deadline: May 15, 2008) to the Final Presentation on June 30th in Enstone, UK.
Applicants must submit a case study in the realm of Formula 1, then explain how they will conduct their project over the six months.

Candidates can enter from March 3rd till May 15th on the official website at: ttp://www.altran-academy.com/

Applicants must be last-year students or recent graduates of a university or prestigious school specialising in science or technology. To enter the competition, candidates must submit a project, describing in 500 words a technological innovation in one of the following eight Formula 1 disciplines: aerodynamics, power-train, race and test engineering, design and analysis, vehicle dynamics, control systems and electronics, R&D of materials, transducers and test technology.
The winner will be selected from a field of nine finalists from around the world who will present their projects this summer to a jury of experts chaired by Robin Tuluie, the ING Renault F1 Team’s R&D manager, at the team’s Enstone facilities.


About Altran
Altran is the European leader in innovation consulting and high technology. The Group’s 17,500 consultants, operating worldwide, cover the entire range of engineering specialities, including electronics, information technology, quality and organisation. Altran offers its clients ongoing support throughout the innovation cycle, from technology watch, applied basic research and management consulting to industrial systems engineering and information systems. The Group provides services to most industries, including the automotive, aeronautics, space and telecommunications sectors. Founded in 1982, Altran operates in 20 priority countries. In 2001, it generated a turnover of €1,591.4 million…

Piquet Jr playing second fiddle?

So, after last year’s showing up of Fredrico Suave by F1’s undisputed rookie of the year Lewis “Jaguar” Hamilton, some of the assorted media hacks are wondering how Ferdi the Putz will do against his newest teammate.

Nelson Piquet Jr, who finished runner-up to Hamilton in GP2 in 2006 and has spent the past year as Renault’s test and reserve driver, while itching to land himself a race drive, which Flavour Flav had promised him.

Thus it’s entertaining to hear this year’s Indy 500 pace car pilot and fellow countryman Emerson Fittipaldi claim that Piquet junior will give the two time world champion Spaniard fits, as Emmo was quoted telling Italian newspaper Gazzetta dello Sport.

“Nelsinho will be worse for Fernando Alonso than Lewis Hamilton [was],”

“Nelsinho is an excellent driver, is very fast and in the past year has completed more than 15,000km of testing with Renault.

“For all these reasons I believe that he will give more problems [than Hamilton, to Alonso].”

And although the winter Olympics (testing) shouldn’t be taken too seriously, nevertheless Alonso has had the upper hand over the youn Nelsinho, so it’ll be interesting to see just who gets the upper hand at the Reggie this season…

Renault R28

Like Honda, Renault’s newest challenger, the R28 also first broke cover at Valencia testing before having its official launch in Paris on January 31st. Of course Flavour Flav (Briatore) Fredrico Suave (Alonso) Nelson Piquet Jr. and test and reserve driver Roman Grosjean were all on hand to give the dreaded PR speak, you know when everybody says how great the new car is, how optimistic they feel towards the upcoming season, blah-blah-blah.

Of course Renault is definitely counting on Ferdi the Putz to push the Reggie further up the grid back into the winners (whiners?( circle and ultimately contest for this years drivers title…

Here comes the Bride-Postscript

Talk about your incentive to come back to the fold… As SPEED’s resident red head (Nicole Manske) read from the teleprompter that Spanish newspapers are speculating that Renault will pay Ferdi the Putz a GROSSs salary of $53 million per year for the next two seasons!

Let’s see, skip the wedding cake, pass the Dom Paragon and go directly to the bank, so much for Honeymoons, eh?

Here comes the Bride

Although it had long been rumoured that Fernando Alonso would rejoin Renault for 2008, the deal has finally been “consummated.” As Team Boss Flavour Flav had previously suggested that it was a 60% certainty that “They’d kiss ‘N Make-up.”

Many pundits thus speculated that Ferdi the Putz would simply stay on “Holiday” until the FIA ruled on the “Reggie’s” infidelities, while Flavio stated that their previous history gave Renault the inside track towards reunighting with the Spaniard. (Prior to the WMSC’s meeting on Dec. 6th)

On November 19th while speaking to Italy’s ANSA Radio, Flav proclaimed that; “Renault would definitely have different drivers next year, [and] there’s a 60 percent chance Alonso will be with us.”

Briatore further commented: “When you marry, split up and get back together it is not easy, [but] we have the intention of finding a solution. This week will be decisive for the marriage."He can choose and he knows us. Last year he chose McLaren and made a mistake. We often forget these are 25-year-olds who have never lived their youths. They'd prefer to stay at home with their auntie than to go doing promotional work in Bangladesh or in Tokyo. Alonso knows us from a human point of view and that is important. The last season has been difficult for him. It may have even changed his personality. We'll talk; I want to see where he wants to go.
At McLaren he arrived as the world champion and he was put in competition against a rookie driver: that way the relationship inside a team is put in danger. You can't have two prima-donnas inside a team. You need to get behind one of the drivers."We have an advantage because we know him. Between today and the day after tomorrow it will be decided.”

Also long rumoured has been the suggestion that Briatore had promised Nelson Piquet Jr. a race seat for 2008, thus it was of little surprise when Renault confirmed that Fernando Alonso and Nelson Piquet Jr. would be the teams racing drivers for 2008, which sees Heikki Kovalainen being shoved out of his Renault drive.

With Toyota seemingly having secured its 2008 driver line-up, it appears the only reasonable seat left is McLaren. Which would fit Ron Dennis’s philosophy of hiring Finnish drivers.

Yet I find Flavio’s comments about putting Alonso with a rookie driver dangerous; HILLARIOUS, since this is exactly what he’s done for 2008… And don’t even get me started on the Prima Donna quip! Also isn’t it funny to hear the Italian playboy talking about long term relationships? “Hey Flav, how’d things work out with Heidi Klum, eh?”

Renault in Trouble

Just when you think that perhaps we’ll make it thru the rest of the year without further legal shenanigans occurring in the Formula 1 arena, word comes of the next major bombshell.

Of course its of little surprise to me that Flavour Flav was in total “Denial Mode” when the first whispers of the story started to make the rounds, as Renault was thought to be in illegal possession of McLaren technical documents.

Yet Renault has issued the following statement that this is indeed true, as Phil Mackereth, an engineer whom joined the team from McLaren in 2006 had brought several floppy discs with him containing Proprietary information.

Renault claims that this information was loaded onto their computer system and Mr. Mackereth’s personal directory before subsequently coming to light on September 6th, nearly one year after his joining the team.

Renault claims when the information was divulged to the Senior Technical Management, it immediately informed McLaren and Mackereth was suspended. Renault also insists that none of the data was used for either of its 2006 or 2007 chassis.

Thus a whole new chapter in the “Spy Gate” saga currently gripping Formula 1 is set to be written as Renault has been issued a summons before the FIA tribunal on December 6th. And it seems only logical to assume that Renault should suffer no fewer penalties then were handed out to McLaren in regards to “Stepney Gate” earlier this year. Especially since McLaren was deemed to not have actual possession of any of the damaging documents on its internal computer systems.

Interestingly even more Draconian punishment was thought to be possible for McLaren before the final ruling and thus Renault at the very least will loose its 2007 Constructors points and be fined $100 million…

If the penalties are more severe, this in turn could affect Fernando Alonso’s return to the team in 2008, as Ferdi the Putz is conveniently on vacation for the time being. Perhaps in Germany, near Colone. (Can you say Toyota?)

It will be strange having two major F1 powerhouses at the tail end of pit lane. Loosing out on other normal “perks” associated with being one of the “Top Four,” which the FIA pays its freight costs for. And much to their chagrin, the rest of the grid will move forward another place…

School ‘O Fisi

Otay, so it’s late and the draining of wits is quickly overcoming me as I stare into the eerie glow of the confuzer… Yet I found this item entertaining as apparently “Fishy Fella” is planning his post Formula 1 career.

Giancarlo Fisichella who is already partners in a GP2 team is now taking the next step by announcing plans to open a Tadpole, err “Techno-Pol.” Better known as a technical center for training of aspiring motorsport applicants. (Hey, I couldn’t resist the aqua lung fishy theme)

Does this imply that Fisi is already expecting Flavour Flav to give him the boot at the end of the season?

Dyno Testing

Here is an interesting video link a friend sent me featuring the Renault F1 “Boy’s” busily testing one of their Formula 1 engines. Check it Out!

Renault Dyno Test

Bell comments on floor issue

Interestingly I seemed to have miss this FIA rules clarification, although I did mention how Ron Dennis had complained about the Ferrari’s underside.

Renault’s Technical Director Bob Bell claims that the ruling to curtail the use of springing to move F1 chassis floors means that Ferrari and BMW Sauber will have needed to redesign their 2007 challengers prior to the Malaysian Grand Prix…

Renault’s Fizzy Water

With less than a week remaining until the season opening Formula 1 race in Melbourne begins, teams and drivers are still all overly optimistic about their chances for 2007. Well ok almost everybody is giddy except for “Ralfie” and “Web-Head” (M. Webber)

This enthusiasm includes such positive “spin” as Renault’s new team leader Giancarlo Fisichella’s comments towards believing the “Reggie” still is a contender. And although “Fishy Fella” could win a race or two, I certainly don’t expect him to be in the hunt for this year’s driver title…

New Kids on the Block

Although certainly not the first major manufacturer to implement such a program, Renault has just announced its class of 2007 development drivers.

And these aspiring young guns hope to emulate the career paths that Fernando Alonso and Heikki Kovalainen took towards ultimately landing full time race drives with the “Reggie…”

Renault R27

Last week saw the second installment of new F1 car launches with Renault leading the triumbrent of Constructors showing off their new race cars…

Renault launched its R27 in Amsterdam in deference to its new title sponsor AIG who replaces Mild Seven. The 2007 “Reggie” sports a striking new colour scheme along with new racing driver Heikki Kovalanen…

To read about BMW-Sauber's 2007 Launch, see: BMW Sauber F1.07