Friday, March 31, 2017

INDY 500: Race is On to Filler-up' the 2017 Grid



As it'll be amazing if we get to 34-cars vowing to contest the 101st running of the Indianapolis 500 this May 28th.

With the demise of KV Racing Technology, who fielded three cars at Mother Speedway last May, Indy 500 "Only" Drivers are busy searching for rides, with the addition of two new teams possibly fielding three Dallara DW12's this May, potentially making a wash for number of missing entries.

As Larry Curry's reportedly managed to get the Harding Group to Pony up for two new Dallara's for Gabby Chaves, as they'll work out of the Dreyer & Reinbold Racing shop in collabouration with DRR's one car entry for Sage Dangerboy' Karam.

While Juncos Racing, who bought much of KVRT's assets will field at least one entry, and possibly two cars at Indianapolis during their IndyCar debut.

As Matthew Brabham, James Davison, Jack Harvey, Zach Veach, Stefan Wilson, and Gustavo Yacaman are the most probable candidates for the remaining seats available, with S-Squared', aka Sebastian Saavedra and Jeff Simmons names also being bandied about.

With Racer's Marshall Pruett noting the following team car counts two months prior to the 101th running at 16th and Georgetown being: A.J. Foyt Enterprises, (3) Andretti Autosport, (5) Chip Ganassi Racing, (4) Dale Coyne Racing, (3) Dreyer & Reinbold Racing (1) Ed Carpenter Racing, (2) Juncos Racing, (1) Larry Curry/Harding Group, (1) Lazier Partners,
(1) Penske Racing, (5) Rahal Letterman Lanigan Racing
(2) and Schmidt Peterson Motorsports. (3)

As the above equals 30 contestants, with Foyt & Andretti having one car apiece listed as TBA, with rumours of a potential fourth car at Coyne, and Juncos possibly fielding two entries...

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

The Tomaso Files: Power Boats, Mercs', PM's and places Far Away...



Some of Sydney Harbour's iconic landmarks. (Image source: www.crystalgraphics.com)
Boss, Boss! De Plane, De Plane...

As the tranquil sounds 'O sizzlin' hot rain Ah-splashin' down upon Kona's Disappearing Sands lava encrusted shores tinkle Thy Ivory's... What better way to launch into this riveting No Fenders tome whilst Opinin' on "Island time," eh?


Wanderin' PM...
This past December thru early January, I listened to another CD Audiobook at my typical Snail's pace, since once again I've let No Fenders rule Thy life; URGH!

Alas, thoust Herculean task was thoust taken uponst
Thyself in some contorted way to keep Thy Audience amused. Whilst I' was off 'N away playing on the B-I-G' Island, albeit Thy tank Done Ran Dry a few weeks out before departing. And hopefully that great 'Ol White Leviathan won't ram me in thou Pacific Ocean!

Thus I found it most Apropos that although I'd selected the author, Bill Bryson, who's travel tomes are quite enjoyable, I-T was either karma or just sheer luck that my friendly librarian reserved In A Sunburned Country for Mwah. Which is Bryson's travel-log upon his Walkabout Down Under, published in Y2k; (2000) Aye Karumba!

As naturally I'd had Australia Mates! Upon thou noggin', since Somme-thuns' just occurred Down Under in Bloody Melbourne, albeit I'd be coming home one day late, and obviously several dollars short; Botta-Boom!

Having chosen to leave a day after ST Pete's IndyCar season opener, in order to view; Err listen to I-T on Thy Telie' since there's perceivably more than two Silver Cars; Err Red 'N White joustin' for victory Stateside.

Although I was mildly worried that Scotty Somonex' Goodyear would put me to sleep & I'd miss my flight; Hya! Then again, the IndyCar broadcast times are typically far MORE palatable then Formula One's abysmal Oh F%%KING DARK 30 here on the West Coast...

Alas, I believe Bryson starts off the book in typical dramatic fashion by wryly musing that Australia's the land where their Prime Minister simply went for a Walkabout and swim in the nearby "surf," only never to be seen again!

As the man in Questione, who I'd never heard of before was the late Harold Hunt, Australia's Prime Minister between 1966-67, before simply vanishing in the waters of Cheviot Beach, on the coast of Victoria nearly a half century ago!


Was that a Mercedes Cigarette Boat that just Swamped Me?
Hey! What's 'Ol Golden Child doin' racin' about Melbourne's Sydney Harbour underneath the famed "Coathanger?"

 And shouldn't Lewis Hamilton be busy piloting a Silver Arrows round Bloody Albert Park instead of a Magneto Green machine; Err Green Hella Magno paint scheme Powerboat! Underneath the iconic Sydney Harbour Bridge.


As Don't know 'bout Y'all, but I had ZERO clue that Mercedes collabourates in the sport of Power Boat racing, primarily those ultra sleek, speedy and blindingly fast Cigarette boats!

As AMG has just celebrated its tenth anniversary of said collabouration by producing the aforementioned Marauder, partnered by the current spec AMG GTR and corresponding AMG automotive products over the past ten years. Although  the Marauder's nearly 3,300bhp is a tad bit higher than current AMG automobiles!

And whenever I think 'bout Power Boat racing retrospectively, naturally I Flashback to the late Didier Pironi, who contested 70 Grands Prix for Tyrrell, Ligier and Ferrari between 1978-82, before his Mega' Shunt which effectively forced his retirement from Formula 1.

Although I know about Pironi's death from a "Rogue Wave" from a passerby Tanker during his fatal boat race, I've never heard or read anything 'bout the other two passengers aboard; Jean-Claude Guénard and journalist Bernard Giroux.

Whilst as typical, Grizzled Journo' Joe Saward has expounded upon the presumably forgotten Monsieur Guénard, and 'Ol friend of Pironi's, fellow racer and le Reggie's' (Renault) original Formula 1 project leader - in one of his nearly 100 Fascinating F1 Facts he's been sharing with us this year.


Meanwhile, naturally Didier's name always triggers the death of his Ferrari team-mate, the legendous' Gilles Villeneuve, for which I've scribbled the previous tome about the late Quebecer...


HMS Endeavour...
As once again, symbiotically, the islands of Hawaii and Australia clash, or perhaps more appropriately are intertwined for Mwah, As Bryson pontificates 'bout how if Bloody 'Ol Captain Cook hadn't discovered Australia, and proclaimed it to henceforth be under the rule of the British Empire, and more importantly the Bloody Queen! Then Australia could have very much have fallen into the hands of the French Wee Wee!

Interestingly, reportedly on Captain James Cook's third and final Pacific Ocean voyage, he narrowly missed our Straits of Juan de Fuca, and laid anchor at nearby Vancouver Island en route to Hawaii, where he ultimately met his death in 1779 after attempting to kidnap the local Hawaiian's chief to rest control favourably towards his expeditionary force...


As I look forward to another visit to nearby Kealakekua Bay
which I visited as a wee lad' before the Ocean wiped the road to I-T out! Having just viewed it from above a few years ago now.

As perhaps I'll get to go via boat tour to Captain Cook's monument on thou Big Island...

Monday, March 27, 2017

F1: So, just who did Drive the #33 in Melbourne?



Like was I-T Joseph, Paul, Max, Ringo or George? As how does that 'Ol Paul Simon song G-O? You can call me Stan, Jack, Gus, Slim or Lee, but just NO reason to be Coy Roy!


Shirley; Oh No! Uhm, surely by now, if you're a regular reader of this Award Winning Blog site, then Y'all know that I'm definitely NOT known for my speeling foreteh' here in Nofendersville; Hya!

As ARSE-Sumedly it's just Mwah, butt, I found I-T Hilarious over the concerted effort to mistakenly identify the driver behind the keyboard of the No. 33 Red Bull Racing RB13 over the tail end of the second winter testing session.

As perhaps it's some sort of mental Blockitus issue over whom No Fenders F1 Spotter Jeannie has proclaimed simply as "The Brat!" As I found it comical that four separate media sources had put their Blinders on, having trouble identifying the teenager Niederlander sensation...

As first via the Daily Mail, in a story provided by the Press Association, I was surprised to hear the name Joseph used, which trolley's a first. Then Reuters motorsports correspondent slipped 'N called him Max. And then Ditto for The Guardian's F1 correspondent. And finally, my favourite Grizzled Journo' did this not once, but twice...

All of which left me to joke with Jeannie that apparently The Brat's NOT racing this year, to which she said How Come? Well, his cousin Joseph and father Max are racing in his place instead; Hooah!

And since I'll most likely not be finding my way anywheres' near a television over the race weekend, since I'll be wishing to bob in the Pacific Ocean with the green sea turtles one final time.

Along with possibly a return engagement to the Kona Brewery for some of their delectable  Pizzano 'N Suds', bumpin' elbows with a kid really named Dundee; Crikeys Mates!

As I've got ZERO clue who'll be chaufferin' the #33, but I'll go out on a limb, and predict that Max; Err Jos Dutchboy' Verstappen will start the race; Hya!

As presumably the Australian GP winner will be one of a very small handful, with the entire grid chasing those G-DAMN Silver Arrows; Ja Volt! With only the Red Bulls and Ferrari's playing the role of spoilers...

MOTO GP: 2016 MIA - The Most Exciting Season that Nobody Saw!



Didn't Y'all Stateside see them ultimate Kneedraggers' on the Telie last year? And did anybody Stateside see 'em this past weekend from Qatar; Chirp-Chirp, Bueller?

Cannot help but think how MotoGP's currently Head 'N Shoulders above thou Pee Knuckle 'O Motorsports, nee Formula 1 right now in terms of On-track action!


What! Y'all didn't see I-T here last year Stateside? WTF! Like doesn't everybody on their overpriced, bloated cable TV service get Peep, Peep, Crickets? Err beIN' Sports; Uhm, beIN' WHO!

As seriously, a record nine different riders claiming victory last season, with an astounding four riders scoring their debutante win; SHEISA!


As I've got ZERO idea if I'll remember, or have time? To peruse the A-L-L Knowing Intrawoods' to see; Uhm, have Lucy', my ARSE-Steamed Screen-reader read me who was fastest in the final test before racing under the Desert Stars 'O Qatar.

As My Boy Maverick Vinales, who I've glommed onto calling him Top gun...

As this SHITZ' gotta stop! Or I really need to start buying some Freakin' Powerball tickets! As I kid Yu NOT! As I began typing Maverick's name above, Kenny Loggins began croonin' Highway to The Danger Zone on my crappy 'Ol radio station; Chuh-Ching!

As Maverick's been fastest in every test session prior to the final test outing March 10-12 at Losail International Circuit before the season starts a Fortnight later (March 26th) at the same Qatari venue.


Whilst surely; Oh No, Here we G-O again; Don't call me Shirley; Hya! Marcus Pinball Wizard Marquez will surely be the man to beat for the title, although it's 2-Wheelz' FUCKING Bad we won't get to witness the Fireworks between Top Gun Vinales, Pinball Whiz Kid Marquez, "The Doctor" (Valentino Rossi) Jorge "the Dancin' Robot" Lorenzo and whomever else dares crash their party!


Meanwhile, whilst naturally I wasn't privy to the tacky dismissal Suzuki carried out against Aleix Espargaro last year, the elder of the Espargaro brothers, with Paul now riding for the brand new KTM Factory squad.

Nonetheless, I'm mildly intrigued over how Aleix rebounds this season aboard the Works Aprilia effort for which apparently many count as a step down from his previous Suzuki mount.


And whilst it's a Real Shame! That NOBODY's seein' MotoGP's ultimate Kneedraggers Stateside on thee Telie', nonetheless, I sure DON'T mind NOT having to get up at Bloody Oh DARK 30 for the live broadcasts anymore!