Friday, July 25, 2014

INDYCAR: Assorted Race Notes – July 25th edition



Otay, so this is long overdue, as I'd begun scribblin I-T 'Wayback whilst waiting out thee start of the Pocono IndyCar race during its ridiculously LONG Pre-amble; YIKES! Which now seems like an eternity ago; especially after having just sat thru endless hours Saturday & Sunday watchin' duh German Grand Prix and 2-in-T.O. on ONE Day IndyCar races...

NBCSN SCREWS DUH POOCH AGAIN!
Note to the BASTARDOS at "Peacock-lite!" (NBCSN) Please do NOT reveal the results of the British GP or ANY other Grand Prix's during your U$ Bank Sports Update like Yuhs did Sunday morning (7/6) moments prior to your "STUPENDOUS" 1hr IndyCar Infomercial Pre-amble; Err Pocono Pre-race, which I didn't bother watching, as thankfully the race's start time had been divulged... As I'm afraid I hit the MUTE button too early during the recap and know who won before watching the replay at 2PM Pacific; SHEISA!

Yet fortunately I'd managed to re-mute the Telescreen before hearing the points standings which would have definitely given I-T away, nevertheless, KNOCK IT OFF "Peacock-lite!" But I digress, as typical...

DOUBLE BROILER
Yet I'm jumping Duh Gun by eluding to thee "Tricky Triangle" before reminiscing 'bout what I've affectionately tagged as the "Double Broiler," nee Houston's Double -Down weekend, which I've already lamented my thoughts in;


Thus, decidedly miffed over IndyCar's STUPIDITY to race not once but twice in Houston during summer, I'd really not planned upon watching either of the races before Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen asked: Don't Yuhs wanna watch the IndyCar race before uze go home? What time is I-T  on? and low 'N behold, I suddenly found myself sitting alongside the esteemed 'Awntie Harriet watching ; Err listening to the rain delayed Saturday race; Huh? Rain in Houston in late June; WTF? As the start was delayed whilst 94-year old Harriet thanked me profusely for getting to watch a  car race with Mwah! Even if it was Mary Ellen's idea instead; as how many 94-year olds with acute Dementia do you know who get excited over watching an IndyCar race, eh?

Thus I really don't recall all what happened, as it was KURR-RAZY! Although I do recall that my Numero Tres Boy "Symone Pagenoe" (Simon Pagenaud) started P1 - his debutant IndyCar Pole position before having issues with one front brake, or is it like one of my supporters recently mentioned; One Fender - in regards to thy Blog; Hya! With the Frenchie' fast fading from contention...

Then in the dying stages, it was too good to be true, being a timed race with a Dale Coyne 1-2 Freightrain of Justin 'B-I-G UNIT Wilson leading his rookie team-mate Carlos Huertas. And although Wilson would surrender the lead needing a splash of Methanol - Gawd, how I 'LUV the smell 'O Methanol in the Morning! Err Ethanol to make the finish, the mostly unheralded Huertas did the unthinkable by winning his first IndyCar race ahead of his idol Juan Montoya with Carlos 'Silk Munoz claiming third - with Columbians sweeping the podium for the first time ever! And then it was off to the "Aroma Dome" (in Tacoma) for a 3hr Bus Ride home...

ROUND 2: TURN ON THE HEAT!
Typin' this just hours  before the final Double of the season at Toronto, makes it seem so  "last year" already, (Especially with the propensity 'O that WET stuff that deluged T.O. during the weekend, eh!) as Hey! This New & Improved condensed IndyCar schedule is FANTASTIC, right? Err, more like BOMBASTIC! As why does the word condensed make me think of condensed milk, like Y'all know how GURR-REAT! That tastes; Oh Never Mind!

As what more can I say than noting how Symone' was completely Knackered after winning the race, saying how he wasn't gonna be like 'Ol "Spiderman" (Castroneves) during his interview, not to mention NO fence climbing! As Pagenaud commented many times upon how brutally H-O-T! It was, mentioning how it was worse being behind the Pace-car with NO air moving than when at speed, as surely the HEAT had a lot to do with determining the day's podium, which was made up all of "Young Bucks!" As Pagenaud was the elder, with his 'Rooskie team-Mate Mikhail Aleshin (Age 26) finishing a fine runner-up, first ever podium finish for a Russian, while "Union Jack" (Hawksworth) scored his debutant IndyCar podium (P3) at the ripe 'Ol age of 23! As Hawksworth's result was the best of the trio after the Englishman had survived the harsh task of holding off an overly persistent Montoya for the position.

Thus, naturally I looked forward to the evening's interview with Houston winner Symone' on duh Speed Freaks, where he revealed he'd lost at least 15lbs over the weekend, amongst other topics...


TRICKILY TRIANGLE
And what a difference a week makes, as 'Union Jack wouldn't be taking part in the Pocono 500, having crashed  in practice, sustaining a 'Mega 100-G crash which ultimately bruised his heart! Along with wrecking his car's "tub," as thankfully he's recovered and the team's built up its spare chassis, with Hawksworth being medically cleared to drive at Iowa just day's later...


Y'all know that Juan Pablo Montoya drove a superb race to score his first IndyCar  victory in 14yrs, as Yuhs just had a feeling 'Ol 'Monty would be there at the end of the race, after the NBCSN Booth Boyz' correctly noted how the leading car was burning an extra 3-laps of fuel for the privilege of piercing the wind for the others, as Tony Kanaan who was  stout all day, got hosed by his team's Pit strategy, as the in-car camera feed played TK's telling the crew he'd gotten a fuel alarm when leading with just four-laps remaining! Certainly a bi-product of his leading much of the race...

While I stumbled upon this brief article 'bout Montoya's crew chief in;

Best Quip I've heard in awhile now came from Townsend Bell who said to 'R. (Robin Miller) "Robin, you've been a Vent Man for 45-years;" Hooah! Which was in regards to Miller talking 'bout what he'd do if he was the IndyCar Commissioner whilst reminiscing 'bout his days as a Vent Man on Pit-lane - which I think was in regards to his Hero Jim Hurtabise?

While I was stunned to hear Tim Cindric's curt advice to DJ WillyP'; "Get your Head on Straight!"  Which was in regards to (Will) Power's block he'd thrown upon  Penske team-mate 'HULIO; which rightly-so, Beaux "Knows" Barfield 'N Company assessed the 'Aussie with a Drive-thru penalty... As my only qualm over the whole matter is Castroneves going Bananas  over the radio 'N calling for the penalty - whilst he seemingly gets treated differently in regards to his  wiggly driving wide moves on-track...

Yet Power's sour grapes afterwards during his interview when complaining over the TV announcers giving him grief made me lose a bunch 'O respect for him. As thee "Thrill from The West Hill" (Paul Tracy) so aptly put I-T! Dude, Yuhs told me to call it like I saw it and you made my job pretty easy!

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